"Angel"
A Songfiction by Erin Lightning


Foreward:

This fanfiction takes place anywhere between the second season of FullMetal Alchemist and around 2-3 years after it. Breaking from the canon of the show, Bradley is still alive, and Roy still has both eyes. Anyway, a war has broken out in a town (unnamed), and Bradley decides that, in order to prevent another Ishvar, the entire military should be called out to destroy anyone and everyone in opposition as quickly as possible. Roy and Riza go into this war and...

(Author's Note: Forgive me, I'm pretty sure I kept them in-character, but it's quite hard with this sort of fiction. Gomensai if my portrail of anyone upsets you. Also, a lot of this story is told in flashback. Just a warning.)


"Spend all your time waiting, for that second chance,"
Roy Mustang's obsidian eyes locked with the bright golden brown ones of his subordinate and his hands, wrapped around her petite frame, drew her closer to him. His lips pressed tight against hers, his tongue slipping into her mouth and entertwining with her own.
The world outside didn't exist now. Only him, and only her. And they were together, if only for just this time.

"For a break that will make it okay,"
He broke from the kiss what seemed an eternity later. "Are you ready?" he asked, in that cold, intense voice that could easily send chills up Riza Hawkeye's spine.
"I've never been more ready," she replied, struggling to maintain the coldness in her own voice. She reached up, as she spoke, and let her hair down, it falling like strands of sunlight against her shoulders.

"There's always some reason to feel "not good enough","
His hands moved to her jacket, and he attempted to remove it from its position wrapped tight around her waist. She obliged, helping him and in turn reached to pull his off of his shoulders. This was done in silence but, as the articles dropped to the floor, she found herself pausing, hesistating.
"Are you sure...this is what you want?" Riza asked.
Her reply came in the form of another kiss; this one much more passionate and intense then the first.

"And it's hard at the end of the day,"
"There is nothing I've ever wanted more," he replied. And it was true. In all the years of his life, Riza Hawkeye was and had always been the one true object of his affections. But it had been a one-sided relationship. For obvious reasons, she was never quite in his grasp. He was always left, lusting for her, wanting her touch, her soft words that he knew she would never show at work.
This movement and these simple words satisfied her and she proceeded to reach for his zipper, using the utmost care to unbutton his pants and then to remove them from his muscular form. He did the same to hers.

"I need some distraction, oh, beautiful release,"
Now they stood with only lingerie still on. Their shirts, their uniforms, lay on the floor haphazardly strewn about.
Crushing her against his chest, he felt his pulse quickening, felt his entire body more alert now then it had ever been, even during the Ishvar Rebellion. He could feel her heart beat strongly against him, the smooth, soft sweat of her bare skin against his.
"Are you afraid?" he asked.
"No," she said, her voice firm. But her eyes, locked with his now, betrayed her.

"Memories seep from my veins,"
He stood there, holding her in comfort, trying to get her to relax a little. Keeping one hand wrapped tight around her bare waist, he moved the other hand up to stroke through her soft, silken hair. She sighed ever so softly, her shoulders sagging lightly, the muscles in her body relaxing, not entirely of course, but to Mustang, it was better then nothing.
"I won't hurt you.." Roy whispered. "I swear I won't, Riza."
"I know, Roy," she replied. "I know."

"Let me be empty and weightless, oh and maybe,"
It was he who lay her down on the bed, his hand moving to unclasp her bra strap. And it was she who spoke now, as if the silence could no longer be tolerated. As if he had to know. Had to know everything.
"I love you, Roy," she whispered. "I love you...so much..."
"Shh," he replied. "I know, Riza...I know you do."

"I'll find some peace tonight."


"In the arms of an angel, fly away from here"
The sound of the bombs echoed outside, slamming against concrete walls, exploding in vast arrays of red and oranges. Shadows flickered upon the walls, dancing to the melody of war. Roy Mustang's ears echoed with the ring of the air raid sirens, blaring the alert to anyone who could hear it still.
And there, locked away in his apartment in the middle of a world torn in two, lay Roy and Riza, both having decided that if this was going to be their last night, they were going to actually enjoy it for once.

"From this dark cold hotel room and the endlessness that you fear"
Roy wanted desperately to get up, to look outside and see what was happening. Was the State winning, or losing? Or perhaps all had turned to Armageddon, and it was nothing but death and decay on both fronts. Perhaps, he had to admit, even if he were out there right now, there would be nothing he could do.
It was so much like the Ishvar war. Just like Ishvar. His heart ached.

"You are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie"
But he was brought back from these thoughts by the serene voice from next to him and a gentle, if not somewhat hesitant, hand placed on his shoulder. "You've been through so much, Roy.." she whispered. "But, there's nothing you can do...don't think about it."
"I know," he said.
She gave a small sort of indignant snort. "It's time, Taisa, that you removed that mask of yours. I see glimpses of you when I look at you tonight, but you still refuse...if you want me, you have to show me yourself.."

"You're in the arms of the angel, may you find some comfort there"
"Sorry, Taii," he whispered, mimicking her calling of him. Was it true? Even now, was he still hiding those feelings from her? His head dropped, and he let it rest against her ashen shoulder as he pondered this.
Perhaps he was hiding still. He didn't want her to see him cry, of course, though that was exactly what he wanted to do now. It was what, when he thought back on Ishvar, he had always wanted to do. So many lives lost. It tore him apart. And now...amidst the same level of bloodshed...
A single tear trickled down his cheek.


"So tired of the straight line and everywhere you turn,"
His thoughts flew like doves back to the bloody red dawn of that morning, and the eruptions of flames around him. Not only the State Alchemists had been called in. The entire State Military was there, the cadets with their guns, the Taisa with his flames. Even the spiteful alchemists like Zolf Kimbree who had been locked up after Ishvar for their horrid powers were redeemed and returned to the battlefield.

"There's vultures and thieves at your back,"
The rules remained as they always had in war: Shoot to kill, destroy them all. Leave nothing standing until they surrender. No matter their age, kill them all. Don't get killed yourself. That was all that applied on the battlefield. Nothing more. Death, desolation, destruction, decimation, and the survival of the fittest.
And here he had come, even though he had promised deep in his heart never to go back to the madness of before. He had never wanted to hold a gun to an innocent again. He had never wanted his flame to be used for that evil purpose a second time over; for this was not protecting the country, this was not saving the civilians...it wasn't even human.
But it was all his fault.

"And the storm keeps on twisting,"
The incomplete Philosopher's Stone had been placed in his hand that morning and, with Riza Hawkeye standing beside him, and Jean Havoc and Kain Fury backing him, he had started it all. He had been the lucky one given the orders to start this chaos.
"Do it, Mustang. It is only suiting that the Ishvar War Hero is the one to make the first strike in this."

"You keep on building the lie,"
His eyes lit with the fear of what he was being asked, but the deep darkness of those onyx eyes hid the fear well. They didn't suspect a thing. 'No,' he thought, inwardly. 'No, I won't...I won't lead this massacre.'
"Mustang! Are you going to follow your orders, or what, Colonel?" came that cruel, commanding voice. "Stand and fight, soldier."
His head turned slowly. There were the looks of his subordiantes, a miror of his own. They were fearful; they knew it wasn't right. But they hid it with as much resolve as any of them could.
Only Riza seemed to be trying hard not to crack. Seeing him, standing there, forced to do this horrible thing; it was terrifying to her. But her wall was up and her defenses set. He knew that, even though she looked weak, she wouldn't give in.
Neither would he.

"That you make up for all that you lack,"
"I-" he started, "I won't do it."
"WHAT?" came the voice again, that deep, throaty snarl of Bradley's. "You won't? And here I thought you wanted to be the next Fuhrer!" He laughed a moment, then quieted, showing one malice-filled eye to Roy as he said, quietly, "I see, I see. I suppose I chose the wrong man for my position."
That was what it took. In an instant, Roy's head lowered, his pride challenged and defeated. He was brimming with anger. And desperation.
Without even being fully aware of it, his fingers snapped, and the flames shot up, engulfing the town.
Riza let out a cry, Jean Havoc and Kain Fury backing away from the Taisa.
"H-how could you?" whispered Kain.

"It don't make no difference, escaping one last time,"
The Fuhrer smiled. "Well done, Mustang." He turned to the two cowering subordinates. "I suppose this is the first time you've ever seen a State Alchemist at war. Well, you better get used to-"
Now! He had to get out of there; he had to get them both out! Roy grabbed Riza's hand and pulled her away from there as fast as he could, looking back over his shoulder as they ran down the deserted street. Just a little farther...
Kain and Havoc safely out of the range, he snapped and turned his head quickly away from the Fuhrer's suddenly smoldering form.
Cries of anger from Bradley, as well as the screams of the innocents finally making their way from the burning houses filled the morning air.
Cloud of ash and soot and smoke blotted out the dawn, and the world fell to chaos.

"It's easier to believe in this sweet madness oh,"
And there, running down alleyway after alleyway, were Taisa and Taii. He dragged her along, frantic, his mind focusing only on escape for now. His senses were ready, and his eyes darted in all directions, looking this way and that for potential threats. He dove aside from the ricochet of a gunshot on the wall beside him, pulling Riza with.
Not bothering to look where it came from, he carried onwards.
What had happened back there? Why had he acted so suddenly like that? He remembered now, almost ironically, his words to FullMetal when they had fought so long ago. "A good soldier acts on speed and instinct." Edward was lucky he would never be a part of something as heinous as this.

"This glorious sadness that brings me to my knees."
Caught in his reverie, he was rudely awakened by a cry from beside him and a heavy weight on his arm as Riza Hawkeye's legs collapsed from under her. Blood blossomed from a wound on her chest, and her cry was now muffled as she choked back a wave of nausea. Tears filled her eyes, but they hadn't just appeared there.
Had she been crying as he ran with her? Damn. he should have paid more attention! But these thoughts didn't occur to him. Instead and on instinct he dropped to his knees by her side, throwing his hands about her.
"RIZA!"


"In the arms of an angel, fly away from here"
She looked up at him, and whispered but one word, "Run." Her body was starting to go limp, and it was losing heat fast. Her eyes grew cloudy almost in an instant, her breathing ragged.
He shook his head. "I'm not going to leave you here, it's against military code!" Roy could feel his heart tearing in two. Why? He should have protected her...dammit, they never should have come to this fairy-tale war in the first place!
"Shut up and go!" she said. "Damn the code, Roy, if you die here I won't ever forgive you!"
He wrapped his arms tight around her. "I...I won't.." She was right. Damn the code. The only thing that mattered to him was...

"From this dark cold hotel room, and the endlessness that you fear"
Tears came to his eyes, lacing the onyx with a beautiful diamond sort of gleam. He clutched her tighter to him. "Riza.."
"Go Roy...go..."
Her voice was fading now and along with her soft pleading came another sound: the sound of shots. Staying here would be death, but...how could he leave her? How could he leave the one person who loved him, who had always been at his side?
Her eyes met his. "Live..." she said, those same eyes becoming now lifeless, dull. "For...me.."
Then everything faded into darkness.


"You are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie"
Now, holding her in his arms as he lay beside her in his bed, exhausted from not only their passionate lovemaking, but also from the memories that had resurfaced, Roy's eyes opened and he asked, "Riza?"
"Mmm?" she replied, waking slowly. "What's wrong, Taisa?"
"It's...all a dream, isn't it?"

"You're in the arms of the angel, may you find some comfort there"
She looked forlorn for but a second, then whispered, "Yes Roy.."
"What really happened, then? Why...why can't I remember? I...I remember you...being shot...then I was here with you...but, that's not right." His voice became suddenly cold, a reflection of his usual tone. "You died.."
"Taisa...you were shot too, don't you remember?" Her hand reached up and touched his side and he winced with pain, his eyes diverting to the cause.
A large bullet wound lay underneath her hand.
He put two and two together, at last, and gave a thoughtful expression. "I fell into this dream...so...I'm still alive?" His eyes grew dark, cold as he contemplated this thought.
She nodded.

"You're in the arms of the angel, may you find some comfort here"
Taking her hand, he whispered, softly, "Riza, I don't care if you'll never forgive me. If waking means never seeing you again..."
"...I don't want to wake up."


Afterword:

The war lasted only eight days before the civilians of the town were all killed. They hadn't put up a fight to begin with, knowing they were far outnumbered. The Military had not given them time to surrender and they were massacred, leaving no survivors. Then, unsatisfied with the bloodshed and sorely lacking decent leadership, the monster that was the State turned on itself.
Bradley, thought to be killed by Roy Mustang, returned to headquarters three days after the incident. He appeared unharmed.
Jean Havoc and Kain Fury both managed to stay alive somehow, Kain suffering only minor wounds from shrapnel fire and Jean suffering a broken arm. The two refused to return to Headquarters until their missing friends were found. They searched both during the chaos and after it to find the missing Taisa Roy Mustang, and Taii Riza Hawkeye. They found them, but not as they had expected to.

Riza Hawkeye had died of a shot to the heart, and was found on one of the back roads of the city.
Laying over her, almost as if protecting her, was Roy Mustang, who had died of blood-loss due to a shot in the side.
Both died smiling, seeming, at least almost, as if they had finally found peace at last.

Taisa no Taii, amari o kyuii


We were once told a story about a Russian man who was caught up in a war. His wife was killed on the battlefield as a civilian and he went back for her, throwing himself over her body for just that "one last time". He was captured, tortured, and killed for this act.
Is it really so bad to love someone enough to go back for them in the end?

This story is dedicated to that one, nameless man.