I'm trying a different approach at this story. I hope its just as funny to you guys!


Erik sighed. He was bored… again.

There was absolutely nothing to do. Nothing to do, that is, except mope around and cry. Erik grimaced at the thought of Christine in Raoul's arms. That was a completely nasty though. He needed to do something to get his mind off of his problems. That was when the small, white scrap of paper caught his eye:

Nothing to do except mop around and cry?

Picturing the girl who left you in another man's arms?

Well… we have something to get your mind off of your problems!

Erik cocked his head and picked up the sheet of paper.


Fresh air, beautiful wildlife, and only your friends around you.

He snorted. Camping? And what friends?

The sound of Carlotta's nasally voice reverberating though the walls made him clutch his ears. He shrugged. He might be able to stand her for a couple of weeks… maybe. But he couldn't just go camping with Carlotta. He needed some other people too!

Christine and Raoul! They'd be good take along, and maybe they didn't hate him so much now! Erik quickly stood up and shoved the paper into his back pocket. When he emerged out of the cellars, he squinted and shook his head. Carlotta stood on the stage, running her scales.

"Carlotta…" Erik threw his voice so that he could see the diva's reaction.

She screamed. "The Phhhannntom of the Opera is there… inside my mind!" Carlotta looked around nervously.

Erik rolled his eyes and then walked onto the stage. He held out his hand. "I'm Erik. You are Carlotta. You, Carlotta, are coming on a camping trip with me."

"No, 'm not!" Carlotta stamped her foot. "You keeled my love."

Erik snorted. "Did you really love him, or did you love the…"

Carlotta cut him off. "Fine! 'll go with you!" Carlotta said. "Is anyvone else going along?" She asked.

"I'm pretty sure the Vicomte and his wife would love to join us." Erik paused. "Maybe we could ask the managers too."

Carlotta laughed brutally. "Haven't oo 'eard? The managers ran 'ff as 'oon as the chandelier fell."

"Oh. Okay. I guess that counts them out then." He shrugged. "Well, you get some things together and we'll be going as soon as I recruit Christine and Raoul."

What am I doing? Erik thought, I'm asking Carlotta, Raoul, and Christine on a camping trip. The only pleasurable thing will be Christine, and she'll be all over Raoul. Erik stuck out his tongue in disgust.

Erik hailed a carriage and caught a ride to the Vicomte's home. When he walked in, Raoul and Christine were in the middle of a passionate kiss. Christine's eyes widened and she pulled away when she saw Erik.

"Erik!" She breathed, "What in the world are you doing her for?"

"Pack your things, you lovebirds." Erik commanded.

"Why?" Raoul asked, sizing Erik up. He shrunk back down at Erik's glare.

"Because, you, Christine, Carlotta… yes, Carlotta, and I are going on a camping trip. I stopped at an equipment store on the way over and bought three tents. One for Raoul, one for Carlotta, and one for Christine and I…"

At the couple's alarmed faces, Erik laughed. "Just kidding! Christine, you can share with Raoul."

The couple, feeling they had no choice in the matter, went up the stairs to their room and packed their things. Erik, meanwhile, inspected the foyer and scuffed up the floor a bit.

"All right. Lets go. By the way, Erik, how long are we staying?" Raoul asked.

"For as long as we need to." Erik told them happily.

When Raoul's carriage swung around to the opera house to pick up Carlotta, Christine voiced her concerns about taking 'that woman' along. "She's annoying!" Christine whined.

"Christine, I'm paying for all of this. Besides, I thought you'd be happy that we were going to a tropical island for just the four of us!" Erik exclaimed.

Christine shrugged. She liked the sound of tropical island.


"Here we are!" Erik exclaimed, stepping off of the boat.

Nobody knew how they'd gotten there so quickly, but they did so shut up.

"Wow. Look at the sand! And the water! And the sky!" Christine twirled about.

"Would 'oo shut up!" Carlotta snapped. "I already have sand stuck in my shoes."

"Oh boo hoo." Raoul mocked.

Erik sighed. "Should we set up the tents?" Erik asked.

This was going to be a long three weeks…

R R!