Chapter Twenty: Half-fish Kids
"So…what things do you have to clean up?"
He could feel the thief grinning in his head/You'll see soon enough./
Very reassuring indeed.
There were quite a few things that she wanted. She wanted tarot cards, she got them. She wanted that really big stuffed animal from the carnival, she got it. She wanted a part in the play, she got it. The one thing she had yet to get, other than world domination, but that had yet to cross her mind. That one thing was Dark Mousy.
"I'll get him tonight! Just you watch!"
"Shush. I'm trying to read. I have a report to hand in tomorrow…actually you do too."
"I'll do it later." She stuck her tongue out at her twin, "You're not supportive at all."
Riku put down her book and looked up, "Alright, I'll give you moral support, once upon a time a girl told her sister to not go crying to her when she found out that she was wrong and her sister was right. She didn't. And they both lived happily ever after."
"I see no moral in that. And no support either."
"You have to read between the lines and not ever, note how there was the 'told her sister not to go crying to her' and the 'she didn't' and the 'they lived happily ever after' part. That's the moral. Don't come crying to me when you realize that you're wrong and I'm right and we'll both be happy."
Risa raised her brow, "That still doesn't make sense…"
Her twin smiled back at her, "You're just a little dumb today, but that's okay."
"My first night back to normal and you make me wear a dress?" A voice hissed in the darkness of the museum.
"Come on, it's only for tonight! We have to clean things up don't we? Don't take it off! Geeze! I didn't go through all this trouble just so it could get screwed over."
"I don't care, it's your fault there was a mess to clean up in the first place, anyways it probably wasn't that much trouble. The only thing that's out of place here is that I'm in a dress and you have your mini-me on your back, what's really out of place though, is the fact that you tied a fin onto his back…why do it?"
"You'll see, for now, you have to stay in that dress and when the time comes make sure you know how to improvise."
-Wow Dark, he's just like you.-
/I know, isn't it adorable/
"We'll get you something to eat later! I thought you wanted to see your real girlfriend."
"Yea! Of course I do! But I'm hungry! How much longer is this going to be? This fin is itchy! I don't like it! I want to go home! Put me down! I can't feel my legs! You take too long! You're uncomfortable!"
-Adorable isn't the word I had in mind.-
/Oh shush you./
A scoff, "He sounds just like you…"
"You lie! I'm much more suave than that! Say yes! Agree with me! I didn't bring you here so you could take his side! He's heavy! I'm hungry too! Take my side now!"
And so, Harada Risa moves onwards with her plot of total Dark domination, it began with sneaking into the museum, it really wasn't hard to sneak past the guards. And they wondered why a profession thief like Dark escaped their grasp every single time.
Next, she had to find the piece that the thief was going to steal, which also wasn't very hard, seeing that all the signs in the museum seemed to be pointing towards that direction, signs with very bold words written on it, "See it now! The piece that the infamous Kaitou Dark will be stealing tonight! Better catch a glimpse of it before it gets stolen and taken away forever and ever! You'll regret not seeing it! I swear! It's very pretty! And it's that way! Just another hall down!" And they wondered how the crowd outside heard about the thief's next target.
Next step, either to wait or to find the item-person-thing-thief-whatever she wanted, Dark Mousy. The third step wasn't all that challenging either, down the hall he could hear people arguing, and they weren't policemen. They were two random people with some random kid. She raised a brow and stepped towards the voices.
"I'm not immature! He's immature! And uncomfortable! Put me down!"
"You're immature-er than me! You're not exactly the softest cushion on the couch either! You're heavy!"
"You're the stupidest!"
"You're an ass!"
"You're a half-fish kid!"
"I am not!"
"Yes you are!"
She watched from behind a doorway to see Dark, Krad and the random kid who decided to jump from the thief's back into the blonde's arms. "Mommy!"
There was a long pause before both she and Krad gaped, "Mommy!?"
The three looked over at the additional voice, Dark gave a wave, "Risa-chan! Have you met our half-fish kid?"
She looked over at the little boy with a fin sticking out of his back, "My name is Dark Mousy!"
"Junior." The thief added hastily, "Dark Mousy Junior, he takes after me more so than Krad wouldn't you say? I mean aside from the fin, that's all Krad there."
The blonde stared at the girl then the boy in his arms, (Half fish kids…you're not serious.)
((I have reason to believe he is both serious and quite mad, I mean why else would he force me to wear a dress and have the child call me…mommy?)) He shuddered at the automatic flashback.
"Half-fish kids? Wasn't that mermaid fishtail a costume?"
The thief gave a nod and flashed her one of his 'looks', "Ah…or so you thought…"
Color flushed to her cheeks, "Oh my…wouldn't that mean you two have…"
He gave a nod of agreement and stated rather bluntly, "We've done it."
Krad gave him a dubious look, it was just like Dark to do something so stupid and overdramatic, the question though was how?
How did he end up in a dress?
How did Dark come up with such a strangely complex plan?
How did Daisuke let him get away with it?
How did he get his mini-me to cooperate so nicely?
How did he get talked into this?
Out of all the questions, only one was answerable, and that was the mini-me question.
One night Dark randomly came home with not only the loot as he loved calling it, but he also had a kid under his arm. "Well one down and one last thing to take care of."
"Put me down! You oversized moron!"
"Is that the best you can come up with?"
Emiko stepped out when she heard two voices and gave a squeal at the sight, "A mini-Dark! How adorable! Before you and Dark go on with your business come over here and try on these costumes! Oh! And have a sucker! You're just so cute!"
That wasn't it. That was only the beginning of the explanation.
"Okay kid, look here, Krad is a guy."
"No he's not."
"Yes he is."
"No it's not."
That part took a really long time, so after they got past the yes and no part and past the convincing part of the argument which took several hours.
"So you're tell me my girlfriend is actually in the painting?"
"And Krad is my mother?"
"That sounds about right."
"And you're my dad?"
"If you insist."
"That doesn't sound right."
Dark grinned, it was just like himself to sound rather smart when people were trying to convince him of things that sounded especially crazy. "Tell you what, I'll take you to your girlfriend."
"Why? I can get there myself?"
The thief shrugged, "I'll give you candy if you do, I'll get mommy to go too. You love your mother don't you? Krad would be heartbroken if you said no."
Like any normal child, he had a soft spot for his mother despite how Krad really wasn't his mother at all and he knew but he decided to play along with it. After all there was candy at stake. "…fine."
Dark's mini-me looked over from the blonde's arm, "Where's my candy, dad?"
((Oh…so that's how he got the kid to play along.))
(That really is a mini-Dark, being bribed by candy…)
The two sighed and shook their heads, the thief smiled and ruffled the hair of the smaller version of him, "In a sec, you have to say hi to Risa-chan."
The mini-thief looked over and waved, "Hello Risa-chan."
The brunette gushed, "Hello! You're adorable!"
The boy grinned, "I know I am."
(Well wouldn't you know it, he's inherited the cockiness too.)
"I-I guess I should leave you three to do your…family stuff. Umm…goodbye Dark-san!" She gave a wave and ran off, too shocked to be upset.
"Is that why you forced me to wear a dress?" The blonde looked over skeptically, it was very unlike Dark to plan this far ahead.
Dark blinked and looked over, "No…I just felt like it."
Golden eyes narrowed, "Is that so…"
"Murder me later, love, let's take my mini-me to see his girlfriend."
"Come along and you'll see."
The three headed to the end of the corridor where a painting stood, Krad frowned, "Dark, this is a mirror."
He looked into the mirror in horror, "Oh my god, I look like you!"
"And I look like you, opposites, you comprehend?"
The blonde glared at the thief, ((How dare he mock me.))
In the mirror, the hunter could see a miniature him in his arms, the mini-Dark hopped out of his arms and ran to the mirror with a big smile on his face, "There you are! I've been looking all over for you!"
The mini-Krad in the mirror merely stared at him as though he were stupid. But that might've been because the mini-Dark had a fin attached to him. (How fitting, one's crazy for the other while the other just stares at him as though he's a talking piece of jell-o.)
((Hn…did you just say a talking piece of jell-o?))
Dark gave the mini-him a pat on the head, "Go on, I bet your little mini-lover's waiting for you."
"Yea!" But before he stepped into the mirror, he turned around and frowned, "Where's my candy?"
"I don't have any. I tricked you!" The thief began to laugh, "I can't believe you fell for it!"
The mini-him gave a growl and kicked the thief in the shin before running off back into the painting-ish thing. Dark snorted and rubbed his shin, "Brat…well at least that's over." He sealed the painting and looked out the window where the police were still on the lookout for him.
He rolled his eyes and grabbed Krad by the arm, "What do you think you're doing?"
"We're getting out of this place via window!"
With that said, Dark Mousy, dragging a very unenthusiastic blonde with him jumped out the window, promptly breaking it to alert the authorities, why? Because he felt a sense of pity inside him, if he didn't do that, they'd probably be on the lookout for him for the rest of their lives.
"Dark Mousy! I'll kill you!" Krad yelled as he unfurled his wings, "The second I get out of this stupid dress I'll kill you!"
The thief laughed as he tucked the art under his arm, "I love you too, honey!"
Below them the police finally took notice that their painting had disappeared. For some odd reason, no one noticed how their underage commander mysteriously disappeared from the scene of the crime. Takeshi looked in the sky and gawked, "Oh my god it's Kaitou Dark!"
Riku rolled her eyes and crossed her arms as she stood beside him, she didn't know why she ended up there but it really wasn't worth her time, "No really…your power of observation never ceases to amaze me."
She looked over at her twin, "So? How did it go?"
Risa looked rather dazed, she probably was seeing that all she could really mutter was, "Half-fish kid…"
Her twin merely nodded in a wise, wise way, "I guessed as much, I mean him and that mermaid… You shouldn't feel too bad about it though, I mean he's only a perverted thief, I don't know why you liked him in the first place."
Riku turned on her supportive-ness side and sighed giving her sister a sympathetic pat on the shoulder, "Yea…I suppose I'd be a little freaked out too…don't take it too harshly."
Her fists clenched and unclenched and clenched tightly again, "Half-fish kids…"
-I think you've traumatized Harada-san.-
/Why does everyone get all 'oh my god!' over half-fish kids? I mean they're not that bad./
-You're just crazy.-
-At least you cleaned things up.-
/You got that right! I'm awesome, hitting two fishies with one rod thing./
-Now you're just bordering the line of obsession with this fish thing.-
/You're just jealous./
-Krad doesn't look too happy about it either.-
Dark looked over, "Hm? Is something wrong?"
"Half-fish kids? What were you thinking?"
The thief shrugged, "I was thinking it might be fun."
"…you're joking me."
(No he's not.)
"No I'm not. It turned out to be fun didn't it?"
"Being dressed up like a girl again? How's that fun?"
Dark crossed his arms, "You had fun and you enjoyed all the attention, admit it."
"I did not!"
"Yes you did! And you loved all those frilly laces on your dress and all those high heels you wore and all those presents you got and all those people playing with your hair-"
He was cut off when he was suddenly being strangled by the blonde, "I'll kill you! You stupid thief!"
There was a pause, the thief gently removed the hands from his throat, "Krad…I thought you turned back into a guy."
Golden eyes blinked, "Yea…what are you talking about?"
"Krad." He said in a very serious manner, "Guys don't PMS."
Then he broke out into a grin and ran off before the blonde could do any more damage to him, a moment later, Krad snapped out of it and growled as he began to chase the thief, "I swear, I'm going to kill you one day!"
"One day, Krad, one day you will."
The next day Daisuke headed to school and blinked when he stopped by Risa's desk to see her drawing something in her notebook, and for once she wasn't scribbling Dark's name all over. Instead, she was drawing dead fishies all over the page. She looked up and smiled, "Hello Niwa-kun!"
He looked away from the page and gave a nervous smile, "H-hi Harada-san, how are you?"
"I'm great!" She drew another dead fish on the page, scribbling things like 'I hate fish' all over. The redhead nodded and left the girl alone to her anti-fish-ing.
-Look what you've done to her, she's gone completely anti-fish.-
/Not my fault/
He sat down beside Satoshi who looked over from his very cool I'm-being-bored look, "Just another normal day hm?"
Daisuke smiled, "Yea…just another normal day…"
Whoa! It's finished! This fic is actually finished! I actually finished this fic! XD Whoo! And before school started too! I'm very proud of myself as you can probably read :) Risa has officially (fic-wise) gone anti-fish :O Whoa! I almost forgot, it's like a tradition to list all the thank yous I can possibly think of on the last chapter. Thank you readers, reviewers, and the random songs I've been listening to while I wrote. Random songs like Big Ass Rock XD Quite amusing. And yes, I'm saying thanks to songs because I feel like it :O
Thank you and thank you again and I'll you peoples around XD I heart you all :)