Disclaimer: I think I'm going to cry. . .
Author's Note: I can't believe I'm doing this. . . yet here I am. Bet none of you saw this coming, did you? I certainly didn't. . . at least, not until I received Blue Rhapsody3-san's review. And she. . . she. . . put a plot bunny into my head! (gasp!) Ergo, if you want someone to thank (or blame) for this, talk to her. (;
So, Blue Rhapsody3-san, this is dedicated to you! (And everyone else who begged for a sequel. XD) I don't plan on this being uber long, but it will be. . . Long enough. (:
- Headlines: A Hollywood Engagement-
-Chapter One: Kagome's New Boy Toy-
"Okay, let's go over this ONE MORE TIME. . ."
"One more time. . ."
"There are FOUR magazines left on the rack."
"Four. . ."
"Do you know what that means. . . ?"
"Well. . . ?" Ayumi prodded carefully, voice stern but gentle. Her body was currently positioned between her rabid friends and the rack of magazines at the drug store- trying her best to salvage the remaining headliners. "There are three of us and four magazines. That means. . . ?"
"Umm. . ." Eri considered for a moment, nose wrinkling. "There are enough Inu-Yasha centerfolds for myself, my mom, my dog, and e-bay. . . ?"
"No. . ."
"Er. . ." Yuka took a stab, biting her bottom lip. "I'll have enough copies to keep one and use the rest to wallpaper my room?"
"NO. . ."
Ayumi sighed heavily, shaking her head. "It MEANS there are enough for YOU, Yuka- YOU, Eri- ME, and the clerk guy staring so intently at us from the cash register!"
". . ." As gazes turned towards him, the cashier looked away; face pink from embarrassment.
"SO," the wavy-locked girl clapped her hands, slowly moving to one side. "Let's be good about this- ONE magazine a person. No fighti. . .!"
"HEY! THIS ONE'S GOT A DENTED COVER!"
"Wha! It DOES! I DON'T WANT IT!"
"Take it! YOU SAW IT FIRST!"
"I did NOT! YOU did! You're the one that ANNOUNCED IT!"
"Er. . . !"
"Oi ve. . ." Sighing once more, Ayumi surrendered; carefully selecting one of the three magazines not currently being fought over and beginning to read the headline about the upcoming movie opening for Feudal Fairytale. All in all, just another normal day in the life of a fan girl. . .
"Um. . . Hey. . ." the clerk guy called weakly from the cashier, waving a hand with a nervous smile. "C-can you toss a copy over here? Before your friends destroy the others? Please. . . ? Uh. . . Hello. . . ?"
But though the fan girl (and boy)s' lives were all peachy, things weren't looking up for others. . .
The Forces of Fate work in mysterious ways, after all. Strange ways. Evil ways. Ways that never failed to completely baffle Kagome Higurashi. Nothing in her world ever made sense. Ever. Fate had decreed that the dryer always eat her left sock, her fiancée be a man she once despised, and her biggest pet peeve, (despite her profession,) be drama queens.
Fate, obviously, held something against her. Though she wasn't sure exactly what. . . Or why. Anyway, that was all irrelevant. Except for the fact that fate was wicked. That was all too real to her right now. . .
Oh, and irony wasn't a great friend, either.
"WHAT!" the actress all but sobbed, clinging to her agent's dress-pants with a helpless air. "Please, Sango-chan, I'm BEGGING you. . . PLEASE do NOT say what I thought you just said!"
The chestnut-haired woman arched a elegant eyebrow, trying to gracefully detach herself from her crying client. But seeing as how Kagome had a grip of steel, it was proving to be much more difficult of an action than originally intended. Leaning back to grip the edge of Kag's makeup table, Sango used the leverage to wildly kick her left leg, in the vain hope of loosening the bear-hug that was cutting off her circulation.
"Kagome-chan, what the hell's the matter!" the woman snapped, exasperated. She'd just had these pants dry-cleaned, God dammit! "Two weeks ago you would have sold your soul for news like this!"
"SAAAAAAAAAAANGOOOOOOO!" Kagome screamed, tears of utter frustration cascading down her cherry cheeks. Ah, behold- the triumphant return of the terrible toddler tantrum. "That's not fair! You of all people should realize HOW STUPID THAT ARGUMENT IS!" Pounding her fists on the floor (much to her now-free agent's glee. Maybe she could just press the slacks- no one could see the tear-stains, right?), the young adult collapsed against the pole that kept her cosmetics chair in place. "After everything you put me and Inu-Yasha through- EVERYTHING YOU AND THAT IDIOT YOU CALL A BOYFRIEND DID- you go and- and-"
"- GET HER A NEW CO-STAR!"
Miroku ducked hastily, narrowly missing having his head chopped off by a flying stapler. "Now, Inu-Yasha- I realize that this situation is a bit. . . er. . . sudden. . . But it will do the two of you some good! You need some time apart!"
A vein throbbed on the hanyou's forehead.
"I DON'T WANT ANY DAMN TIME APART!" Inu raged, his silvery hair billowing behind him in all of its masculine splendor as he used every last ounce of his strength to uproot his powder seat and chuck it at his agent. "We spent YEARS apart! We HATED each other! LOATED EVER FUCKING MINUTE WE WERE TOGETHER! And the moment we're engaged- when we've FINALLY gotten over all that- THAT'S WHEN YOU DECIDE TO GRANT OUR PAST WISHES AND SEPARATE US!"
"It's not like it's permanent!" the violet eyed man protested, easily dodging a few throw pillows lobbed at him with the force of freight trains. "Next movie- or maybe the one after that, depending on how the public reacts- and you'll be back together again! Promise!" He paused momentarily when the cushions smacked into the back wall, creating craters the size of basket balls. ". . . You might want to look into getting that plastered up."
Inu-Yasha snarled, tawny orbs flashing blood red and his teeth gnashed. "YoOoOoaRgRgRgRGHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" Flopping backwards and sliding down the wall, the actor began panting heavily; sweat dripping down his brow. His loose, button-up black t-shirt hung limply from his toned muscles; new jeans squeaking slightly under the strain of all this unanticipated exercise. The dark cowboy boots on his feet scuffling the linoleum as his bottom touched the ground, he raked his clawed fingers through his bangs. "Dammit," he cursed quietly, clenching a fist around a handful of his pale tresses. "This isn't fair!"
"Life rarely is," Miroku consoled, deciding it was now safe to sit next to his client. Taking the opportunity to do so when it arose, the ebony locked male smiled at his friend; legs crossed Indian style. "But come now! It's not like you're not in the movie! You're on screen more than either of the other two, in fact!"
"I'm the bad guy!"
"Every movie needs a bad guy."
"But I'm an EVIL bad guy!" the half-demon whined.
Inu's representative rolled his eyes. "You DO have a heart in it, you know. You even have a few romantic scenes with Miss Kagome. . ."
"I try to RAPE her!"
"Heh heh, you know what they say- It's not rape if she wants it. . ."
"But in the movie she DOESN'T!"
"Details, details. . ." he scoffed, waving a casual hand. "The point is that you and Miss Kagome will see plenty of each other . . . It's just that she'll be doing the hot, steamy, passionate sex scenes-of-want with someone else! Not you!" One could actually hear the little heart added to the end of his statement.
". . ." the younger man sent his employee an icy glare from the corner of his eye. "Gee, thanks," he drawled. "I'm feeling so comforted."
"Good!" Beaming cheerfully, the agent tilted his head. "You should! As you yourself has told Miss Kagome- it's not the on-stage kisses that mean anything. And I'm sure she's giving you a LOT more at home than she'll give her new co-star here. If you catch my drift. Speaking of which. . ." A large, perverted grin began to snake its way over Miroku's lips, making his amethyst pools twinkle. "I hear you two are living together. So how go the 'late-night luuuuuuuuuuuv rehearsals'?"
Inu-Yasha's face flushed magenta. And- unable to turn away from a good innuendo session- the employee unwisely continued. "Do ya teach each other new 'techniques', or are you more traditionalists?"
Inu's eye began to twitch; clenched hands shaking. Warning bells began going off in the other's mind, but he was always one to live on the edge. (He went out with Sango, didn't he?)
"MIROKUUUUUUU!" Ignoring the agent's yelp, the growling actor attacked wildly- face almost the same deep maroon as his eyes. "I'M GONNA KILL YOU!"
"W-wait! No killing me yet!" Miroku begged, trying his best to scoot away as his employer gnawed on his head, talons slicing wildly. "I've got so much left to DO!"
"Ough 'Eaaah?" the hanyou retorted icily, the horror he might have struck in anyone's heart fizzing out thanks to the large amount of hair he had in his mouth. "'Ike waaaa!"
"Like telling you who Kagome's co-star is gonna be!" he whimpered, fruitlessly attempting to bash Inu-Yasha's head against the wall in order to get him to release his precious ponytail. "I wasn't gonna, 'cause you're not gonna like it, but seeing as how you've already reacted, I guess I should just get it all out of the way!"
The actor's eyes narrowed. Spitting out his representative's head, he hissed warningly- leaning dangerously closer. ". . . Who. Is. It. . . ?"
With a scream so high-pitched that even the coffee-guzzling security guards took a moment to see what was wrong, the infamous police captain Ayame ripped open the front doors of the studio; beyond livid. Dust and plaster raining down from the ceiling, the usually cheerful woman allowed her features to contort in fury. "WOULD ANYONE CARE TO EXPLAIN WHAT MY HUSBAND'S AGENT JUST TOLD ME!"
From the expression on her face and the screams of rage and horror that were now reverberating off the walls from the direction of Kagome and Inu-Yasha's rooms, the answer to that question would most likely be a "no".
But it wasn't looking like they had much of a choice.
That's the end of chapter one! Not sure how long this will be- I've got a basic idea of what I want to do and therefore have not written an outline. (Dun dun DAAA!) Oh well. We'll just have to see what happens! XD
I'll try to update soon! Please R and R! Ja ne!
I'll try to update soon! Please R and R! Ja ne!