Disclaimer: I don't own The Hamptons (name ripped off from the movie White Chicks), a GQ magazine (no seriously ;; I don't own a copy!) or any of the Inuyasha characters.

Rating: PG-13 for a teensy bit of swearing. Just a teensy.

Author's Note: I'm practically shattering my dream with this fic hahah, but it was fun writing it. Scroll to the end of the story (press End on keyboard) for footnotes if you don't understand something. Reviews are always a pleasure to read : 3

Summary: Long walks on the beach, candlelight dinners… nothing could go possibly wrong, could it? Miroku x Sango

The Perfect Date

Miroku sighed for the 59th time as he glanced at the clock on the wall. It was 1:30, bright sunny afternoon and no where to go. He couldn't understand why someone who was good-looking, had charm and not unemployed could have absolutely no where to go on a day such as this. Inside, he already knew why. It wasn't because he was not "dating-material", or that he had "commitment issues." No, plenty of girls like him and is more than willing to go out with him, but his affection was not so easily won by them. He already had another girl in mind, someone who was smart, determined and not stupid. Sango was that lady. Too bad whatever charm he used on other girls fails him whenever he was around her.

Miroku slumped down on his couch and gazed out the window of his sunlit beach house. He left buttons on his shirt undone, feeling nauseated from the heat. Everyone else out there seem to be having some fun in the sun, he thought grouchily. Tick tock tick tock. He was bored to tears. He lazily flipped through a GQ magazine he found on the glass coffee table. A page with hot pink lettering caught his eye. 'Everything a Woman Desires.' Wide-eyed, Miroku skimmed through the list.

Long walks on the beach.

Candlelight dinners.

Dancing in the rain.

Tapping his chin lightly, he thought, 'Maybe this is what I need to get Sango to fall in love with me.' Grinning, he dialed her phone number and started mentally planning The Perfect Date.

Everything was perfect. Nothing could go possibly wrong. He checked his purple shirt one more time, making sure the top three buttons were undone. 'Flaunt it just a little,' he smiled. He wore black slacks, looking casual but handsome all the same. The little diamond stud on his ear gleamed as he smiled. Everything was just right: she agreed to go on a date with him (surprisingly!), the sun has been shining so far today, clear skies and maybe a light breeze of wind. A light stroll on the beach with Sango… he even had a conversation in mind!

Ding dong 'That's her!' he thought excitedly. Checking one last time in the mirror, he strode to the door and opened it. There was Sango, looking stunning as usual. Miroku flashed her one of his charming grins, grinning inwardly as he saw her cheeks coloring slightly. 'That's a good sign,' he cheered inwardly. Holding out his hand, she took it and they walked out.

The beach was very crowded. Little kids were running around everywhere. Miroku had already taken off his shoes and socks because the sand was dirtying them. And the heat was almost unbearable. He let go of her hand to wipe his sweaty palms on his pants. Running his hand through his hair he suggested,

"Want to walk near the water instead?" The sand was burning his feet, sticking in between his toes and getting into his toenails.

Whoever thought walking on the beach is romantic must be retarded, they both thought silently to themselves. They walked silently on the shoreline, the wet sand felt cool beneath their feet. 'Think of something to say you dork!' his mind scolded, but his tongue-tied rendered him speechless. Maybe a nice gesture? Like finding her a pretty shell for keepsake of this date?

"Oh shit!" Sango cursed. She lifted up her feet to see that she stepped on a fairly sharp shell. "Damn it, stupid fucking shells."

'Guess not a shell,' he noted silently. After guiding her away from the shell-mined shoreline, they sat on a rock to look out on the sea. The landscape was picturesque, rolling waves crashing continuously on the sand.

"So Sango…" Miroku began, gathering his courage to talk to his date.

"Yes Miroku?" she replied, too busy swatting the flies around her to look at him.

"Do… you… want to go somewhere else?" he managed.

Without replying she stood up and walked as far away from the fly-inhabited area as fast as possible. 'Part 1 of the date went completely horribly,' he groaned. 'Is there anyway to fix this?' His mind snapped back to the article in GQ magazine. 'Romantic candlelight dinner at a upscale restaurant, that's it!' Jogging quickly to Sango, he flashed her a grin and asked,

"Would you like to join me for a candlelight dinner at the Hamptons'?"

Annoyed at how her wonderful afternoon was ruined by his ingenious date, she turned to glare at him. Miroku's smile faltered but there was still a bit of hope in his eyes. 'Please don't say no…' he prayed silently. Giving in to his puppy-eyed look, she sighed and agreed. Miroku skipped a little, grabbed Sango's hand and ran towards his car. Sango, despite herself, laughed. This date couldn't get possibly worse, right?

Swanky was the only word that came to mind when entering the restaurant. Instead of walls, there were windows everywhere, from floor to ceiling, giving the customers a gracious view of the water fountain outside. Lights were dimly lit creating a hazy romantic mood. A garcon told the couple to wait "a few minutes because they were clearing up a table." After half an hours wait, Sango's patience began to wear thin but she said nothing. The garcon returned, leading them to a table near the entrance of… the restrooms.

"Sorry ma'am, but without reservations, this is the best table that is available."

Forcing a smile, Sango nodded curtly and sat down on…folding chairs. Miroku sat down, slightly embarrassed and looked at Sango with an apologetic glance. Clearing his throat, he opened to menu to decide what to order. 'Holy shit.' he mouthed. The prices there were extremely high! "A salad for 34.99" he muttered at the ridiculous price. Looking up at Sango, he asked,

"Ready to order?"

"Yes, I'll have a salad."

Miroku hardly tasted the meal. For one thing, the worry of not having enough money ate his insides away. And for another thing, the expensive food tasted like crap. But looking at Sango was enough for him. The dim candles lighting up the table gave a softened glow to her features, illuminating shadows here and there. Miroku smiled warmly and said softly,

"You're so beautiful today, actually… you're beautiful everyday."

Sango reddened from the compliment. 'He isn't so bad I guess... he makes that earring look good!' she thought to herself, embarrassed. Miroku leaned over to kiss Sango. Just before his lips touched her cheek, his chest knocked over the candle, setting both his shirt and the table cloth on fire. Frantic, Sango grabbed a glass of ice water and splashed it all over the flaming shirt. That knocked out Miroku cold, sending him shivers from head to… well down there. After the garcon put out the fire on the tablecloth, Miroku stared down on his plate and muttered,

"Wanna leave?"

Grateful, Sango agreed. The garcon handed him the bill, chuckling as Miroku's eyes went from big to bigger. Gulping, he whispered,

"Hey Sango… can I.. borrow some cash?"

It was pouring outside the restaurant. Sango and Miroku ran to his car (which was parked 3 blocks away). 'Great, here we are dancing in the rain.' He thought sullenly, vowing to burn the GQ magazine once he goes home. Without a word, he drove her home, not even waiting for her to say good bye, and sped away. Ah, the Perfect Date eh?

Foot notes: (in case you didn't know)

GQ magazine is a men's magazine filled with teasing pictures and other fun stuff that testosterone-filled guys love ;)

The Hamptons was a hotel in the movie White Chicks where pretty much all the rich and famous people go to. I made it a swanky restaurant in this story.

Garcon is waiter in French.