Oh wow. It took months for an update. I'm sorry! School is ridiculous and it has been taking up most of my life. I hope you all forgive me.
Hi, My name is Jealousy
Harry had to endure many days of the silent treatment and door-slamming. In his opinion, Draco was being the childish one. He was definitely overreacting, Harry thought. What's a couple of hangouts between two adult(ish) men? It's not like he and Michelino were involved or anything, on contrary to Draco's beliefs. When Draco wasn't ignoring Harry, he would sarcastically ask, "Did it fit?" Harry would just ignore him, but after the 20th time that question was asked, it would tend to get violent in the Potter/Malfoy household (throwing of inanimate objects and such).
It was quite amusing though, coming from an outsider's point of view. But the amusement did go away after a while since the house became a war zone… so Ron and Hermione began to limit their visits. But they found themselves coming back just to see Draco's antics. He was always trying to think of something, anything just to annoy Harry and to show how angry he was although he would always insist, "I'm not jealous, Potter. What types of pasta he puts up your arse is really none of my business." If it weren't for the joy of seeing Draco squirm, Harry would've stopped this little dating-Michelino façade a while ago. As annoying as it was, Draco was just too funny for his own good. Plus, Harry was still angry at him for throwing such a fit on the day of his first modeling shoot. What horrible thing did Michelino do to Draco to have him deserve such hostile feelings? Harry swore he would get to the bottom of this.
The shoot with Michelino had been successful and so many witches, young and old, insisted that more pictures were to be printed of these two good looking wizards. So of course, there was a repeat since it had become such a hit. They were now the new "It couple" and the demand for more photoshoots was ridiculous. Harry didn't mind but it pissed Draco off to an extent. But he couldn't help but tag along and watch Harry and Michelino do their work.
"Why don't they just put out a sex tape?" Draco hissed to one of the people during the shoot. Being a Wizard, he obviously wasn't too familiar about recording tapes since it was a Muggle thing. But he remembered hearing about some scandal in the Muggle world involving a "sex tape" so he thought it would be fitting to bring it up. "Maybe they can put it online!" Like he knew what "online" even meant, but he just wanted to sound smart. "And people can Google it!" Yet again… he had no idea what the hell he was talking about. But due to his rage, he really couldn't help but just ramble.
People would just smile and nod since they really didn't know how to react to this. How do you act in the presence of a disgruntled model?
After a shoot, Harry approached Draco hesitantly as if the blonde happened to be a bomb that would explode at any second. Draco greeted the other boy with an icy glare.
"You are very distracting," Harry mumbled as he grabbed a water bottle from one of the tables.
Draco buffed his nails on his shirt, then held them out for examination. "I try," he said simply, then picked up some eyeliner. He usually would put on eyeliner when he was irritated.
"Well, stop it!" Harry hissed. "It's not exactly helping me. You know, Malfoy. You're being very immature about this whole thing."
Looking affronted, Draco stopped (in mid-eyeline) and whipped his head to look at the boy, "Immature?" he repeated with a snort. "You're the one gallivanting off with Spaghetti Boy knowing exactly how I feel about the whole damn thing. You're doing this to get me riled up and jealous. Now that, Potter, is immature."
Harry paused briefly, then continued, "Are you jealous?"
Draco gave him a look that plainly said Fuck. You. And he walked away without another word. But only to the other side of the room where he was free to glare at Harry all he wanted.
Harry sighed and turned the opposite direction in order to ignore the frosty stares of the blonde, which was a failed attempt since he could feel Draco's eyes burning holes in the back of his head. What was his problem? Oh fuck that, Harry knew he was jealous. But still… the relationship between him and Draco was quite muddled and confusing, he didn't even know where to start. He didn't even know if it should be considered a relationship. But before Harry could continue getting lost in his thoughts, a male voice snapped him back into reality.
"Are you two fighting? Is it a… lover's quarrel?" came Michelino's voice.
The other boy quickly glanced up and smiled sheepishly, then shrugged his shoulders lightly. He didn't know how to answer that exactly. Lovers? Whatever. He didn't know what the hell they were. He took a chance and glanced over to Draco very briefly and just as Harry suspected, he was seething and was trying to be very subtle about it.
Unfortunately, Draco didn't know how to be subtle, since he snapped the eyeliner in two and mouthed silently to Harry, Your neck.
Oh great. Now he was threatening him. Harry rolled his eyes and gulped down more of the water.
Hermione squirmed a little bit in her seat as she sat from Ron across the table at a coffee shop. Since Harry was busy with his modeling, the two found themselves hanging out more often.
"How are you and… what's her name?" she asked him in what she thought to be a casual tone.
"Oh, right. Karina."
Hermione obviously didn't forget. It's just that whenever she said that wretched girl's name, she'd feel sick to her stomach for no reason. And the worst part was, Karina wasn't wretched at all. In fact, she was sweet.
"She's great," Ron answered without his usual enthusiasm and Hermione noticed this.
"Oh?" she said in a tone that she hoped would encourage him to go further.
But much to her displeasure, Ron just shrugged wordlessly, keeping his eyes focused on the ground. He had been on edge throughout the whole week and Hermione found it strange and quite uncharacteristic. She wanted to question him, but that would probably just annoy him more.
She tried to resist, but… "What's wrong?"
The boy just grunted and stood up, "I'm gonna go home, Hermione."
"I'm going home," as he stood up, the chair scraped noisily against the floor and he made his way towards the exit without another backwards glance. He left Hermione hurt and confused, not really knowing what the hell had happened just now. Her eyes lowered to Ron's cup of coffee which was untouched, and for some reason, she felt a lump grow in her throat. Ron was upset and she didn't know why. Hermione felt helpless.
After work, Harry and Michelino chatted amiably for a few minutes. Draco watched them from a distance, curious as to what they might be talking about. He could see that Harry was laughing at something the Italian git had said. Frowning to himself, he wondered why Harry had never laughed like that with him. Letting out an aggravated sigh, he ran his fingers through his hair and tore himself away from the sight. He couldn't understand why it was bugging him so much. It wasn't as if he loved Harry.
Oh, there he goes again. Going back to that question of love. Of course, he didn't! What an absurd notion. Sure they had played nice a few times but it didn't necessarily have anything to do with love. Draco Malfoy never fell in love.
He laughed to himself. Well, more like he laughed at himself. He really needed to get rid of that "I'm such a big shot" persona. Because deep inside, he really was just a sniveling idiot. A sniveling idiot who never got laid.
Draco Malfoy. Virgin extraordinaire. A fucking fairy.
Growling to himself, he kicked a random can on the sidewalk and watched it clatter against the pavement. He couldn't go back home. He didn't want to have to face Harry and other realities that might come crashing down on him if he dared to look into those green eyes again. He needed to stall. Something. Anything.
Draco turned around and raised both eyebrows, "Weasley."
"Where's Harry?" Ron asked.
"He's off playing with his new gal pal," Draco answered with a hint of venom in his tone. "Where's Granger?"
Ron shifted his weight from one leg to the other and shrugged lightly. "Last time I saw her, she was at a coffee shop."
Then came the awkward silence. The two never really got along. In fact, they hated each other back in the day. But now, it was more like a grudging tolerance. But still, there wasn't much one could say to their once-most-hated. Ron took a chance though and broke the silence.
"I see Harry's doing well. With the modeling stuff and all…"
Draco chuckled derisively, "Yeah. Ever since he started traipsing about with his love god, Michelino, I've never seen him happier. I bet they shag standing up."
Ron, who still was slightly uncomfortable with the mention of anything gay, glanced off to the side and coughed. "Er… well…. Um."
"Oh sorry, Weasley," Draco snorted. "I forgot. Our lifestyle makes you uncomfortable." He immediately caught himself. He said "our lifestyle" without even thinking about. Draco's eyes widened and looked at Ron to see if he had noticed, but the redhead was too busy trying to get the images of Harry shagging to even be aware of what Draco said. The blonde let out a sigh of relief and continued, "What are you doing wandering around here anyway? If you're not with Granger, you're usually off with your… whatshername. Little Asian thing."
"She's busy," Ron said a bit too hurriedly, then quickly shifted the spotlight on Draco again. "So what's the deal with you and Harry? You jealous or what?"
The abruptness of the question caught Draco off guard and he faltered a little bit. "Erm… what?"
"You two are constantly fighting. And when you're not fighting, you're ignoring each other. And then when you go back to fighting, you always bring up that guy who you so lovingly refer to as Pepperoni Butt."
"Don't forget Fettuccini Face."
"Whatever. My question is, are you jealous? If so… then why?"
"I'm not!" Draco snarled.
Ron gave him a look that clearly said Bullshit.
The boy sighed and chewed on the inside of his cheek, then focused his gaze on the pavement, "You should've seen him today," he began in a low voice. "Harry, I mean. Laughing with Michelino. He doesn't laugh like that with me. Nothing I say can even make him smile. And when he does smile, it's probably forced. I just…" Draco let out a groan of frustration. "Fuck. I don't know."
"Yes, you do," Ron said slowly. "You know exactly."
Draco felt a lump in his throat and he swallowed it back. He did know. He'd known all along. But admitting it was the hard part.
"And you know what you have to do," Ron continued.
"Yeah…" Draco said, his voice cracking slightly. "It's just… you know… hard."
"Of course it is. You can't expect this shit to be easy," Ron looked frustrated, as if his problems were in the same category as well. "If it were easy, then everybody would have someone. Then we'd all be happy. We'd all stop playing games… we'd be with the right person."
Draco arched an eyebrow, but said nothing.
The frustrated redhead shoved his hands into his pockets, "What are you still doing standing around here? Don't you have someone to go home to?"
"I know you love her."
Ron didn't say anything. He didn't have to.
"You're such a coward, Weasley."
"Fuck off, Malfoy."
Catching each other's eye, they shared a smile.
Draco stood in front of the door of Harry's apartment, debating whether he should open it or not. This mental war went on for about 10 minutes and he finally decided to just go in. He couldn't very well spend his entire night outside trying to sort out his chaotic thoughts. So he turned the knob and pushed the door open.
Harry glanced up at the sound of the door creak. Looking at Draco apprehensively, he began speaking in slow and hesitant tone, "I was looking for you after we had finished. I couldn't find you. I was kinda worried."
Strangely, a bit of jealousy stirred up inside Draco's chest, "Yeah, well, you looked just fine when I saw you walking with Michelino, so I decided to just go off on my own."
Harry's eyebrows drew together in annoyance, "Will you quit thinking about him for just this once?"
There was tension in the air as sparks flew between the two. Nearly visible sparks, mind you. And not the good kind either. Neither spoke for a few moments since they couldn't find the words. Although, a lot was needed to be said.
"What's this really about?" Harry asked in an almost despairingly.
Draco scowled, "What's this really about, you ask? Don't act like you don't know. It's about you. And it's about me. About us. If there even is such thing as an 'us.' I just want to get some things straight."
"Shut the fuck up and let me finish. We've been playing this goddamn game for too long now and it's too much for me to handle. I've cracked, dammit. I've reached my limit. I'm tired of beating around the bush. Fuck being discreet. Fuck being subtle. Fuck these games you and I play. I'm just going to be straightforward."
"Do you love me?"
Harry's eyes widened significantly since he did not expect those words to come out of Draco's mouth, "What?" he asked, even though he heard clearly.
"Do. You. Love. Me." Draco repeated, emphasizing each word.
"Draco, I…" Harry's face screwed up into an unreadable expression. And before Draco could do or say anything else, Harry had run to the front door and sprinted off.
Oh yay. Drama. Anyway, I've been wanting to write a My Chemical Romance fanfic for a while. But what category would that fall under? Can anyone tell me? Oh…and I sure hope that you all would follow me from Harry/Draco to Frank/Gerard. Even though some of you might not know Frank and Gerard which is a pity because they make such a lovely pair. So after "A Beautiful Disaster," I'll be working on a lovely MCR fic. Please don't miss it!
And my friend just gave me a good idea…Fanart. Send me some fanart (from A Beautiful Disaster, of course) and I'll post it up on my website for the world to see!
Email them to me at CherryBlossoms08 AT yahoo DOT com along with your name. Thaaanks.