Author's notes: I really like this pairing, and for those of you who think I'm nuts, allow me a moment of explination:
The first time I ever read this pairing, it was before I completed Final Fantasy VIII. I didn't KNOW who Laguna actually was in relation to Squall. I fell in love with the pairing, and now... now that I know, I cannot take it back.

So I offer this, almost as a 'repent' for knowing what it is, and for loving it, finding it hot and kinky despite how much I really don't like incest. kbye.

This is a story of angst, of love, of anguish, of pain, and of finally accepting the truth that cannot be denied.

Love cannot be denied.

Warnings: Incest. Sex. Cursing, it's got it all.
Disclaimer: Not my characters, not my game, just my words using Square's characters.

Denial

Prologue: Guilt

I constantly wonder if you're watching over me. If you are, I apologize. This wasn't something I planned. My guess is that having met only a handful of moments before leaving him behind has a lot to do with this. For all it's worth, I'm sorry. I never meant for something like this to happen.

I need him. I need him like I needed you. He's the breath of calm sanity to keep me in line. Sometimes it bothers me to see your eyes looking back at me when I look at him. Sometimes it disturbs me that I see some of my own traits in his face. But there's nothing I can do. I've tried, Hyne knows I've tried to break the bond between us, tried to sever the ties. I've purposely hurt him, and he has purposely hurt me. Each time we managed to act cold and frigid to each other for only a week at best before a touch, a look, a gesture would send us back into bed with tears in our eyes, swearing we'd never to it again - which is why we're here. We can't fight it any longer. Don't get me wrong- I still think about you often, and it still hurts. I wasn't there for either of you when I needed to be. I swore that if I ever found him I would always be there for him. But before we realized it, this happened. I would be surprised if you aren't angry with us for this. I can't help it and I would take it back if only I could. Perhaps if circumstances were different, we may not have fallen in love and our relationship may have been strictly paternal, as it should be. But that's not how it happened.

Forgive me, Raine.


I never knew you. Laguna always speaks very fondly of you, when he's able. He does a lot of remembering even while I'm with him.

It's odd. I met you while settled into Laguna's mind long before I was even a thought on your mind. I know I'm an outcast for loving my own father, but, I met him how you did - before you did, in fact. At the time, I had no idea. The first time we met, there were suspicions, but it got to the point where I started to fall in love with him - after the lust hazes cleared the first time I saw him up close and personal, and not from his own mind.

His age didn't bother me. There was something about him that just drew me in, probably similarly to the way he did with you. I denied it when I discovered he was who he was, but he was in the same situation. We did try. We fought it for months. And then he asked me if I still wanted it. I tried to deny it, but it was no use. We've tried pushing each other away. We've tried hurting each other. We've tired everything we could to stop this. I'm sorry. For all that we tried, we've failed.

Forgive us, Raine.