Luke can't be into dudes. Nuh-uh. It's not genetic, this queer thing. Gay thing. Gay, not queer. Right. He's not supposed to say queer anymore, it's offensive or something, and he is now sensitive and informed about the homosexual community. Or something. He hates when his dad talks about being gay, like it's this issue, like Luke is someone he has to convince he's a good guy, when all Luke cares about is that his dad's his dad, and that he's happy. He can deal with his dad's boyfriends coming over and staying for dinner and sometimes breakfast, he just doesn't want his dad to get, you know, political.
But still. He's eliminated queer from his vocabulary now even though apparently it can be used in a non-offensive way depending on who's saying it – and he never thought that he'd know something like that, or that he'd have to – and he can deal with his dad being gay and the only thing he can't deal with is him being into dudes, and not even because he's prejudiced or whatever, but because it'd be ridiculous, right? Gay dad raises gay son. It's weird. It doesn't happen, shouldn't happen. Last time he checked there was no such thing as a gay gene – and that's another thing he never thought he'd have to know about.
It's all Cohen's fault, showing up and staying there and having long girlish eyelashes – how's Luke supposed to resist eyelashes like that? At first he thought maybe it was just the girlish thing, that Cohen is just way too feminine for his own good, and that's where everything gets confusing, but he's seen Cohen shirtless too often now to pretend that Cohen is anything like a girl. Maybe not a contender for a Mr Muscle contest any time soon, not like Ryan – dude, why couldn't he have been into Ryan instead? At least he's acknowledged to be handsome; it'd be excusable, expected, nearly. Cohen is a whole other story – but he's not all that bad.
He's getting better and better as the days go by. Damn it. Luke can't be into dudes. He watches Cohen, thankfully (or, unfortunately) completely dressed, and contemplates maybe kissing him – only he has a feeling Cohen might not actually be gay and that'd be really ironic after all these years, and he knows Cohen would appreciate the irony way too much – and tries not to look as though he's checking Cohen out, and decides he's going to blame his genes for this, no matter what the scientists say.
That'll be his excuse, if Cohen asks why he's being kissed.
- end -