Title: You Never Said Goobye

Chapter: 3 - Hot, Wild Phone Sex and Abandonment Issues

Comments: Soooo sorry that I took such a long time getting this chapter out. I wasn't sure how I wanted to go about it, and I'm not too happy with how it came out. Granted, the original draft was much worse...In fact, I might just go format the disk that it was on (again!) to make sure it's never discovered.


"Are you sure you have everything?"

"Yes, mom, for the last time, I've got it all. All two suitcases and my one duffle bag. It's all there."

"Well, maybe you should go and check one more time…"

With a sigh, Rory rolled her eyes and pushed stray lock of hair out of her face. "Mom," she said firmly, grabbing her mother's shoulders, "I've got everything. I don't need to go check again. If I do, I'll be even more late than I already am."

Lorelai, silenced, nodded, her face etched with sadness. They were standing in the driveway of the Gilmore house, and it was, as Lorelai said, 'earlier than any human should be awake to experience'. In truth, it was only about six AM, and the sun was just beginning to rise, bathing the lawn and driveway in shadows.

Luke, still wearing pajamas, stood next to Lorelai and had his arm around her shoulders. She latched onto him dramatically and pretended to sob uncontrollably into his chest. "Oh Luke!" she wailed, "My baby is abandoning me! She's going to leave me behind and forget about me and I'll be alone and lonely for the rest of my life!"

Luke, looking slightly amused at his wife's antics, said, "Well gee. Looks like you've already forgotten that I'll be around then? Maybe I'll go with Rory, then. I'm sure she wouldn't mind a little bit of company."

Lorelai looked up at him and playfully smacked him on the arm. "The ultimate abandonment!" she exclaimed as she crossed her arms huffily, "My daughter and my husband are going to let me waste away!"

With a roll of his eyes, Luke put his arm around Lorelai's waist and started to lead her away. "Come on, Lorelai; let's let Rory get out of here."

"Oh, fine," Lorelai said sullenly. She hugged Rory tightly and kissed her forehead. "You have fun out there, okay? You go and have a great time, and meet people, and find the love of your life, and all that fun stuff. But…when it's all over, come back here, okay?"

Rory nodded, her eyes shining with unshed tears, and hugged her mother once more. "Don't worry, I couldn't stay away from Stars Hollow for too long. Life would be too boring!"

Lorelai smiled around her own tears and nodded. With a final hug, she stepped away and let Luke lead her back to the house. Once they were inside, Rory took a deep breath and glanced down at her watch.

"Gah!" she exclaimed as she hurried to the other side of her car and got in, "I'm gonna miss my flight!

And with that, she hastily started the vehicle and peeled out of the driveway and down the road.


The phone was ringing.

Jess glanced up at it in annoyance, occasionally considering going to get it.

"Jess!" came his father's voice from the bathroom.

"What!" he replied over the sound of the phone.

"Can you get that?"

Jess smirked. "No, I'm afraid I can't!"

Jimmy stuck his head out from the bathroom. "And why can't you?" he demanded.

"Well," Jess started, "I haven't quite come up with an excuse yet. When I do come up with a suitably witty reason, I'll be sure to tell you."

Jimmy rolled his eyes and went back into the bathroom. "Get the phone," he said, "or else I'm cooking dinner tonight."

With a look of fear, Jess scrambled toward the still-ringing phone and picked it up. Anything was worth avoiding Jimmy's cooking.

"Hello?" he said into the receiver.

"Good morning, oh nephew of mine," came a dry voice on the other side.

"Ah," Jess said in a pensive sort of way, "Dear old Uncle Luke. I was wondering when you'd give me a call. It's been awhile…I was beginning to think you'd died." Despite his choice of words, it was quite obvious that Jess was happy to hear from Luke.

"Trust me, if I'd died, you would have known. In fact, I would place money on Taylor calling you to accuse you of being the cause." Even over the phone, Jess could tell that Luke was smirking. It was a running joke between them that if Luke ever died, Taylor would immediately blame Jess.

"Ah, that's right. I shouldn't have been worried, then."

He heard Luke chuckle before he said, "Nope. You'll know about it when it happens. Till then, you can keep hoping, right?"

Jess grinned. "Why Uncle Luke, I can't believe you just said that."

"Yeah, well, I'm in a joking sort of mood. Anyway, I…uh…called for a reason."

Jess sat back on the couch that he was occupying, intrigued. "Oh? Do tell."

"Well…Liz called me, and we got to talking about you."

"Joyous day."

"Yeah, I know what you mean. Anyway, she wanted to know if you were…y'know…seeing anyone?"

"Well…I happen to see quite a few people. Mostly customers, you see, but every now and then I see Jimmy or the mail man."

"Ha ha, very funny. I'm serious here! I've been wondering the same thing."

"No, Uncle Luke," Jess said, rolling his eyes, "I'm not seeing anyone. Why would Liz wanna know about that anyway? She could have called me and asked me, either way."

Luke's tone of voice suddenly grew uncomfortable. "Yeah, well, you know…I just…uh…was wondering too. Yeah. So I volunteered to call and ask."

"Huh."

"We just wanna know what's going on in your life, is all."

"Huh."

"Well…I'm gonna go…Lunch rush and all."

"Alright. That sounds like fun. Give Kirk all my best."

"I will," Luke said with a snicker, "Lorelai sends her love."

"You made that up."

"Yeah…Guilty as charged."

"Bye, Luke."

"Bye."

As Jess hung up the phone, Jimmy stepped out of his bedroom, fully clothed and drying his hair with a towel.

"Who was that?" He asked as he went into the kitchen.

"Luke," Jess said simply.

"Oh yeah? What did he want?"

Jess rolled his eyes. "He wanted to have hot and wild phone sex with me."

Jimmy came back in and playfully whacked Jess on the shoulder. "What did he really want?"

Jess shrugged. "He wanted to know if I was seeing anyone. Said Liz wanted to know the same thing." He looked up a Jimmy, a smirk on his face. "I think he's up to something. What it is, I'm not quite sure of yet."

Jimmy sat across from him. "Well, I'd be wary all the same. Luke can be quite a devious man."

Jess snorted as if to say, 'right, in what universe?' but he stayed quiet. After a moment, he leaned against the arm of the couch and picked up a book. "What are you planning to do today?" he asked Jimmy.

"Well," he said, "since Sasha and I both have the day off, I thought I'd take her out for the day. You know, maybe the mall or something. Or maybe an amusement park, since Lily's at school. Do it to spite her, you know?"

Jess chuckled and flipped the book open. "You, Jimmy Mariano, are a terrible person."

Jimmy nodded and buffed his nails against his shirt. "I know I am. But I can't help it, you know? My evil nature just calls to me."

Sasha, Jimmy's wife, chose that moment to step out of the bedroom, drying her hair as well. She had a fresh set of clothes on and looked like she'd just gotten out of the shower.

"Wait a minute," Jess said, "I didn't hear the shower turn on a second time." He looked from Jimmy to Sasha suspiciously, and they both hid their faces.

"Oh. Ew."

Jimmy laughed out loud and Sasha smacked him lightly. "You told me he was still in bed, Jimmy." She said admonishingly. Jimmy shrugged and said, "Hey, I did what it took."

"You blatantly lied to me."

"It got you in the shower with me."

"Oh, so you decided that the best way to do so would be to tell me that there was no way he'd find out and that he was still fast asleep."

Jess looked at Jimmy with an amused expression. "Fast asleep? Me? Jimmy, it's almost noon. Even I don't sleep that long."

Sasha rolled her eyes. "Men," she said incredulously. She looked apologetically toward Jess. "Not you, though," she said, "You're surprisingly non-stereotypical most of the time."

Jess nodded in thanks.

Clearing his throat uncomfortably, Jimmy glanced at his watch. "Well, what do you say we hit the road, Sash?"

Sasha rolled her eyes and mouthed the word 'men' once again, patted Jess's leg in a farewell gesture, then stood and followed Jimmy, who had vacated the room just after his suggestion.

Jess sighed and turned his attention to his book, his expression softening a bit as he started to read.