Chapter 1: There She Goes
By: Vampire Toy
PG 13 (Just in case)
Disclaimer: Me no own ;;
Summary: "Children have the uncanny ability to know that they're different and that their love is special at a very young age, it's when they get older that others cloud their hearts." A series of events leads Hinata to realize things about herself she'd rather not know, but are these realizations going to make her fall deeper into depression or help her survive? (Votes for side couples or rivalries welcome)
WARNING: Lots of Hinata-angst, NOT a bashing fic, shoujo-ai (don't let this freak you out though)
Votes for other couples wanted.
(No, please, please answer!)
The storm was pelting my face and I was freezing; I hated the rain. It always seemed to have a negative effect on me, giving me time to think over how worthless I was. That's exactly what I did, but this time I almost went too far…..
I'd gotten as far as the kitchen, holding the butcher knife close to my wrist, I was so close to ending it all….but the cook came in and I became afraid and dropped the knife, running out into this horrible night.
I needed someone to talk to or I'd go insane!
Thankfully there was someone who I'd acquired a valuable friendship with over the past few months.
"Hinata? W-what's wrong? Oh you're soaked! Come in, what are you doing out this late?"
I burst in and almost fell into Sakura; she grabbed hold of me and shut the door quickly before pulling me over to the couch in her living room.
"Sakura….its…. I….I'm really scared and :hic: I-I don't know what to do…"
"Hinata….hey, what's this…?" Sakura grabbed my arm and looked at my wrist.
"Hinata you're bleeding…"
"I-I didn't! I mean…I was going to but I didn't cut…" (The knife must have slipped when I got scared…)
"Its just a small slit, nothing major….but…Hinata, why would you even THINK about doing something like this?"
"I-I….I don't like the rain."
(What a stupid excuse)
"Me either….hmm, stay here, I'll get some medicine for that ok? We can talk about it when I come back."
I nod dumbly and sat in silence. I had been coming to her a lot more lately, though I'm not sure exactly why. After the Chunnin exams I'd tried to hang around Naruto and his team more so that I could get closer to him and maybe work up the courage to tell him my feelings. Lately, however, that didn't seem like it would ever happen; I would suddenly feel awkward around him when he would flirt with me and I'd begin to feel uncomfortable. I couldn't understand it; did this mean I didn't love him anymore? It was then that I approached Sakura first, to ask her to help me sort out my feelings; after all she spent a lot more time with Naruto than I did and probably knew him better along with the kind of affect he has on people. she finally helped me come to a conclusion….and so I kept coming to her for help.
(Sakura-chan, why do you always end up taking care of me? I'm so sorry to be such a burden…)
"Here we go, give me your arm," Sakura lightly rubbed some cream over the tiny cut and finally put a Band-Aid over it.
"Now, please tell me what's wrong! You've begun to really worry me Hinata!"
"It's just that….. my….my father…he's sick and…. Its been hard this past while, me being in charge, I'm beginning to think….that maybe….Neji…."
"You're doing a great job, you're a very competent leader Hinata, a very strong hearted person."
"No…I, no I cant, I was actually thinking…I mean, I want what's best for the clan…and seeing as….this might foreshadow how I might lead my clan ….Neji should take over…"
"Hinata, your father wouldn't want that…"
"Yes he would, …he knows Neji is stronger than I am."
"So? Neji won't just TAKE the offer from you; he has to feel he's earned it. Don't start him on another 'destiny' trek or something."
She was right, he wouldn't just TAKE it, he'd want to kill me first….he'd told me once that he was already over our branch difference, but his demeanor towards me said otherwise.
"Hinata, it doesn't sound like that's all that's bothering you."
"Oh…well….my father…is hiding things from me and has been pushing for me to, um, get married."
"He knows he's dying!"
(It is out now, I feel a little better with someone else knowing)
"He's VERY sick Sakura! It's not like a cold or something, I mean, he can't even get out of bed anymore! He has to be fed! Sakura I'm scared for him and for my clan!" I began sobbing and shaking; immediately Sakura pulled me into a tight embrace, resting her head above mine as I clung to her and cried into her shoulder.
"Hinata, it'll be ok….you can do this….you can lead your clan, and you don't have to get married…not yet, your so young still, you have plenty of time…."
"I-I have to find someone Sakura!"
"….well…I guess we could look through your options if you want ….."
"There's Shino, he's from a good clan…"
"I think he's…asexual."
"Uhh, well it wouldn't surprise me…umm Kiba? He's form clan too, pretty good status...I'm guessing you want to marry into another clan, if not I can list more…"
"I dunno…..why are we going through OPTIONS! I have NO options! I need someone to love me first! I can't ask someone to marry me for my own sake!"
"Hinata calm down! Your right, we shouldn't go through options yet, it's not that bad. Listen, how about you rest for a little while and we'll discuss this when you're a little more clearheaded?"
"Well…I-ok….umm, thank you Sakura-chan…."
"No problem, here, you can sleep over since the rain is still coming down pretty hard. You might get sick if you go out again."
"Oh, I can make it back, really…"
"No way! You're staying if I have to lock you in. Come on," Sakura grabbed my hand and pulled me up from the couch pulling me down the hall of her small home and into her room, "You can sleep in my bed again, go on."
"Where will you sleep?"
"My parents room, they're not here again, don't worry about it Hinata, you worry too much."
"A-are you sure? I could sleep on the couch."
"No! Come on, you've slept over here plenty of times, you know where I am if you need me."
Vampire Toy: WHELP Hope you guys liked the first chappie. I don't expect this to get many reviews cause not many people seem to like shoujo-ai but I'll be updating for my own sake. If you do happen to review, tell me what you thought, R&R and flames welcome