Hey! I don't know what had gotten into me. But I thought I want to write something lighter than my other story, A Silver Hero. This one is kinda light, humorous, and not quite angsty. I hope you guy like this!
Summary: Sasuke… tripped. On what? A stinking, rusty and really stupid sardines can. But then, there was a lot of smoke, and what do you know? Standing before him, was a pink-haired girl. She beamed at him. His eye twitched irritably. Seconds passed. Then his eyes widened in the verge of it's limits. Why? The girl suddenly threw her arms around his neck and called him… " MASTER!" His reaction:" Shit."
Disclaimer: nnnnnnnnnnnnoooooooooooooooo. I don't own Naruto. Weeeeeeell, nobody ever let me own anything! Do you flaming flamers hear me? I do not own it! If you hate this story because you hate the way I write it, well suck on that, bee-yotchs!
Sasuke: will someone call the fire department? She's turning very red. I don't want to see hell yet. I still have to avenge my clan.
Your Wish Is My Command!
Wish # 1: I'm a genie in a… can!
It was one of the sunniest mornings Konoha had ever had. The sun peeked through big fluffs of clouds, and the sky was a soft shade of Caribbean blue. A light breeze carried leaves and small specks of dust into different destinations. Everyone loved their mornings. Yeah… everyone.
WRONG! Sooooo wrong.
You see, there are only 2 creatures in Konoha who wouldn't even care if the sun is shining or been thrown into the biggest body of water. One is the devil with pointy ears, who wasn't even living in Konoha, and the second was the raven haired, onyx eyed, smirked up guy who had been known as Uchiha Sasuke.
Uchiha sasuke hated, no, despised mornings. Why? Here are three flashbacks to prove it:
Flashback # 1:
He scrubbed some more.
It would be a great possibility that after that kind of scrubbing, his skin would turn raw. And (smackdown! Hehehe!) pink. Yeah. That would be priceless.
He got out of the shower.
Fangirls: DROOL… OH MY GOD!
He dried himself up.
He took a step.
Then he tripped and landed…
… on his butt.
He looked around.
There was a bar of soap sliding across the tiled floor.
In his mind: Soap are morons.
Flashback # 2
A series of loud knocks issued from the other side of his wooden door. He looked up angrily, and tired to stare away the unwanted visitor. Then he felt extremely stupid. He forgot the tiny fact that the door was closed shut.
He got up to his feet, as the loud knocks continued annoyingly.
He grasped the doorknob firmly, and opened it with one forceful swing.
Naruto stood before him, his fist still suspended on thin air. He looked down innocently at Sasuke, who was trying to hold back the blood that began to fall freely out of his nose.
" Sasuke-bastard, come on and get your ass up, were going training!"
" Dobe…" Sasuke said threateningly, his voice in a squeezed up tone. (you know how Squidward talks? Yep. Right.)
" What? Hey, your nose is bleeding! Eeeew, that's gross! Damn, you read one of those 'paradise' books Kakashi had!"
In his mind: Blond hyper-active ramen-loving boys are morons.
Flashback # 3
He heard a lot of rumbling behind him.
He turned around.
His eyes widened.
Fangirls… rambling towards him… shrieking… shouting… even more rabid than ever. And… very ugly.
His eyes widened even more.
Landed on his face.
Fangirls circling him.
Laughing… shrieking… asking him out on dates…
In his mind: Fangirls are moronic people who deserve to die.
Now, you might think that Sasuke should be in the hospital right now, in a hospital bed, in a hospital gown. But actually, he was walking his way towards the training grounds, ignoring the sweet chirping of the birds flying around him. He quickly shoed them away, but they resorted on pecking him until he reached the bridge.
Naruto looked at him, then noticed the little winged creatures circling him.
" Aaaaaaaaawwwwwww, Sasuke, they like you!" he said in a fake-sweet-girly voice, snickering loudly.
" Shut up before I think about killing you, dobe." Sasuke muttered furiously, trying to slap the nusciance away.
But then, they heard a call.
No, a shout.
No, it was actually a shriek.
The loudest shriek you could ever imagine.
The birds suddenly stiffened, then dropped down on the ground like flies.
" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Naruto screamed.
" Saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaasuke-kuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuun!" the girl shrieked louder.
" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Naruto screamed again.
This thing happened several times before Sasuke even reacted.
" Why is everyone screaming?"
The blond haired girl put on his sweetest smile before going on, " I was calling your name ever-so-sweetly, Sasuke-kun!"
Sasuke raised a curious eyebrow. " Yeeeaaaah. Right"
He shifted his gaze at Naruto, who looked like he was still undergoing a traumatic experience. " And you?"
" Ino was screeching so loud, I thought something bad happened and we are all going to die!" he said in a panicky voice, waving his arms for exaggeration.
" I wasn't screeching dobe, I was ever-so-sweetly calling Sasuke's ever-so-sweet name!" Ino said snappishly, batting her eyelashes at the certain Uchiha.
Naruto felt a big sweat drop form on the top of his head. " Um, yeah. Yep. That's… right. I guess."
Sasuke turned on his heels, and then walked off, going deeper into the forest.
" Sasuke-kun, where are you going!" Ino called, thankfully in her normal speaking voice. Another dose of that 'ever-so-sweet' voice she has, he'll die and just decide to meet Itachi in hell.
" Nowhere. I'm taking a walk."
" Oh, can I go, pleeeeaaaaaaase?" she asked again. She's talking with her sweet voice now.
Nice. This part of the forest was peaceful. No hyper-active boy. No shrieking fangirl. No lazy-ass teacher reading his perverted book. Really nice.
In one moment, he was thinking and appreciating the forest next moment, he landed on his butt. Really hard.
He got up angrily and tried to look for the moron who tripped him.
But when he looked down at his feet, there, inches away from him was a old, rusty, and really moronic sardine can lying there.
Then he got pissed and kicked the can hard.
" Moronic cans." He muttered under his breath, shoving his hands down his pocket.
He began his walk once more when he heard a faint sobbing. Curious, he turned around.
No one was there.
But he can still hear the faint yet distinct sobs from somewhere.
His gaze landed on the can.
Feeling a bit stupid, he picked it up, and took a peek inside of it.
Then, there was a lot of smoke, and guess what?
There before him was a pink-haired girl, with the most elegant emerald eyes he could ever imagine.
She was dressed like some genie who got herself lost and can't find her way back to a Halloween party.
Not only a genie, but a really pretty genie.
Why? Here's a list of what a genie should look like:
Some TVpersonality: Genies are beautiful women who grants the 3 wishes of the person who releases her from her lamp. They are extremely beautiful and is unrealistically energetic, that sometimes, there's a great probability you'll really get pissed off.
There are several ways of deciphering one.
she should have those fancy jewelries hanging on her neck and wrists.
(genies are into fashion statements)
they should have their bellies exposed.
(duh! Everyone knows that.)
when you do encounter one (I mean, you're the first person she sees), the first thing she says is: "MASTER".
(in other words, they will follow you around.)
She continued her sobbing, not quite noticing Sasuke staring at her curiously.
" Master! Why did you leave me here?" she cried pathetically, her fingers on her eyes, very much like how a child does it's crying.
Sasuke's eye twitched.
She was like a baby.
" Stop crying." He commanded.
She looked up at him.
She stopped abruptly.
" It annoys me."
Then she asked, " Did you –hic!- open the –hic!- can?" she said in a trembling voice.
Sasuke nodded bluntly.
She slowly stood up. He noticed how petite she was, she only reached until his jaw.
" Master…" she whispered.
Sasuke's eyes went sharp as he looked at her with maddened surprise. " What?" he hissed furiously.
" You're… you're my…"
" I'm your what?" he hissed for the second time.
" MASTER!" she beamed at him, then threw her arms around his neck.
In his head: Shit.
I guess that's it then! I hope you like this, coz I don't really know if it was right to put this up or not.
T.V. narrator: And now, here is an announcement made by an inspired author.
Sasuke: Yeah right. Whatever.
Me: You frickn' flamers who flames people with senseless flames are there? Well, just try on flaming me with senseless flames, but I tell ya, it won't hurt a rat ass! I heard some people are flaming authors because they think they suck big time but they are actually really good! Well those people sicken me! You people who flame authors with senseless flames must die painfully!
Me: BUT, I am totally willing to receive flames packed with goodSENSE! Please, if you are going to flame me, please don't forget the sense! It's just a five letter word to remember! FLAMES WITH NO SENSE WHATSOEVER WILL BE CONSIDERED SENSELESS (duh!), AND IT WILL AWAKEN MY ANGRY SPIRIT ONCE MORE.
Please, let me conduct a little survey. Just attach these letters on a review or something, just so I can see who sees my point.
DO YOU LIKE FLAMERS WHO GIVE SENSELESS FLAMES?
A- I HATE THEM!
B- I love them! And so I hate you!
C- I dunno… confused! I am totally confused! or...
D- What the heck is a flamer anyway?
Please participate! I would really love to hear from you (with angry spirits! Just joking!)
So, see you around!
Sasuke: Yeah, see you around, morons.
Me: Sasuke, you idiotic bastard! Stop that! Sorry, but sasuke had been hooked up with the word 'moron' ever since I wrote this story. So please, forgive him, and please, don't bother sparing his life! Simply kill him!
Angry mob leader: GET THE MORONIC CHARACTER FROM THE MOST WONDERFUL ANIME, NARUTO!
Angry mob: LET'S GO!
Fangirls: NO! WE WILL PROTECT HIM! SHUT UP YOU LOSERS AND GET OUTTA HERE!
Me: STOP THE WAR!