Lust Bunny

Summary: Supernatural lust has taken over the members of Angel Investigations

Author's Note: This is just something very silly that popped into my head one day and demanded to be written.

Time Frame: S3, I guess

Pairings: Well…you'll see.

Wesley lounged on the sofa in the Hyperion lobby. He flipped a glossy page of Cosmopolitan magazine and stared at another girl modeling a cute "back-to-school" outfit. He sighed. Wesley Wyndham-Pryce: the top of his class at the Watcher's Academy, well-versed in all manners of demonology, and quite the handsome fellow (if he did say so himself)…reduced to reading a shallow, mindless girl's magazine. But he honestly had nothing better to do. Business was slow. There were no vicious demonic attacks, no sinister prophecies, no ancient evil rising from the depths of hell. Good for the world. Bad for Angel Investigations.

"I'm home!" The door banged open and Cordelia walked in. "I'll give you a couple minutes to hide the magazine and get into a nonchalant position, Wes." Wesley, frozen in mid-leap, sighed and straightened, embarrassed.

"Hello, Cordelia. Did you have any luck?" His question was answered as she came into view, carrying more bags than he would have thought possible, and balancing a large box.

"I was stress-shopping, Wesley. There is no bad luck."


"But, I actually was really lucky today," she set down her bags and held the box to her chest, a dazzling smile brightening her face. "Guess what I bought?"

"The Spear of Golgemytl?" Wesley asked, eyes glinting with boyish desire. "I just heard of it's transfer from the Tombs of Kazhad to-"

"Reality check, Wes," Cordy held up a hand and laughed. Wesley blushed slightly and nodded. "Open it." She nodded to the box. He reached over and removed the lid. He peered down into it's depths.

And peering back up at him was a fluffy, white rabbit with brilliantly pink eyes.

"Isn't it the cutest thing?" Cordy asked, setting the box down gently and scooping up the animal inside.

"I suppose so, but," Wesley straightened his glasses, brow slightly furrowed. "Why?"

"Well, there was this guy standing on the sidewalk and I usually don't talk to those kind of guys but he totally leapt out in front of me and was like, 'lady, you look like you could use a rabbit'. And I was like, 'no, sorry' cause what would I do with a rabbit? Give it to Angel for a special dessert? But anyway, he thrust this box into my face and I saw her and she was just so cute I couldn't resist."

"She certainly is cute," Wesley admitted, tilting his head and smiling at the new pet. He glanced back up at Cordelia and he blinked. A slow smile spread across his face. "But…not nearly as cute as you are, if I may say so." Cordelia blushed and looked down.

"You don't look so bad yourself, Wes." She looked back at him and their eyes locked.

Angel flipped a page and yawned. The peace and quiet was nice, but it was also a little unnerving. He had returned to his office to find Wesley gone. It was possible he had only escaped to keep Cordelia from noticing his Cosmopolitan hobby, but wouldn't he have said something? Oh well…things were close enough to normal as they ever would be. He couldn't be bothered by every single unusual occurrence in the hotel. He dealt with the strange all night long. Couldn't he at least have the day off once in a while?

He heard the door swing quietly open. He looked up and saw Fred peering timidly into the room.

"Oh, hey Fred." She took his acknowledgement as an invitation and slipped inside the office, shutting the door silently behind her. Angel frowned. Something seemed off with Fred. She wore her usual jeans and T-shirt but seemed…different. Was she wearing perfume?

"Hello…Angel." She said his name with such studied sensuality his eyes widened.

"Was there something you wanted?" He asked, willing himself to think of a reason she was acting so strangely. She nodded slowly.

"There's been one thing I've really wanted ever since I got back from Pylea…"

"Oh? What is it? You know I want to get you everything you need," he could tell he was speaking too quickly, though whether it was from discomfort stemming from Fred's expression or nervousness with the sensation building in the pit of his stomach he wasn't sure.

She beckoned him closer with one finger. She bent fluidly to whisper in his head, resting her hot palms against his chest. He could feel them even through his sweater. It was an intoxicating warmth and he shut his eyes to enjoy the sensation, like a cat sunning himself.

"You." Eyes snapped open and he leapt backwards.

"What! Uh, Fred I thought, well, didn't Cordy deal with this-"

"You know I couldn't put you out of my mind," she pursued him, closing the distance he desperately tried to create between them with mind-numbing speed. "Angel." He had backed into his desk and she took the opportunity to wrap her arms around his neck and press herself against him. He hadn't thought such a stick-thin girl would have such power, but he found himself halfway bent backwards over his own desk.

"What's the matter?" Her eyes were huge and expressive. "Don't you think I'm pretty?"

"Fred, I-" he trembled under the delicious warmth that was radiating from her body into his, but quickly threw off such thoughts as well as the Texan clinging to him. "We can't do this, Fred."

"Why not?" She pouted, and looked down at herself. "Is it because I'm…inexperienced?"

"No, Fred, it has nothing to do with…that." He allowed himself to rest a hand on her shoulder. "Besides, I," the heady smell of perfume, mixed with blood and spicy Mexican flavoring made him feel dizzy. His eyes drooped half-closed and he subconsciously stroked her shoulder "I always did like the virgins…" His head lolled dangerously and she wrapped her arms around him again, nuzzling her head into his chest.

"Oh, Angel!" His name snapped him out of his trance and he untangled himself from her embrace with lightning speed.

"No. Fred, there's something going on. We, you and me, I mean, we're not…we wouldn't…"

"Fine," tears had now begun to leak from her eyes. She turned on her heel and burst out of his office, sobbing. Angel took a deep breath to clear his suddenly very muddy head and went out after her.

"Fred, I didn't mean to-" But she had already moved on. His jaw almost physically dropped as he took in the sight of Fred and Wesley passionately entwined. It looked very much like they were trying to swallow each other. She had her hands wrapped in his hair, and his hands roamed freely over her thin frame. The tears on her cheeks hadn't even dried yet.

"Oh god. What are you two doing?" Wesley broke away panting, and Fred did not even take a break, continuing to feverishly kiss his cheek.

"I would have thought that obvious, Angel. And might I mention," a very naughty smile spread across his face and did the former Watcher actually bat his eyelashes? "you look positively stunning."

"Right." He hadn't thought it would be possible for him to feel more uncomfortable than he had a few moments ago with Fred in his office, but the awkwardness level had just increased exponentially. "Listen, Wes, there's something going on here-"

"I'll say there is!" Angel turned to see Gunn standing on the balcony looking furious. Fred and Wesley both turned their heads, still closely embracing, at least managing to look vaguely guilty.

"Gunn, listen, there's a problem-"

"I can see that, Angel." Gunn strode angrily down to the entranceway. "That man over there was kissing my girl." His eyes suddenly softened and his lips trembled. "When he should've been kissing me."

This time, Angel's mouth really did drop open.

"Oh, Gunn." Wesley slipped away from Fred who allowed him to go freely. He ran over to the bald man and quickly began to shower him with light kisses.

"Okay, now I definitely know something is very, very wrong," Angel backed away from the madness he saw in front of him. Right into Cordelia.

"Hey there Angel." She slipped her hands dangerously close to his belt buckle and he squeaked in a very un-Champion-like manner and batted her hands away.

"What is going on!" She laughed.

"Come on…you know you want it." He considered this for a moment. Cordelia certainly did look unusually appealing today. He could just hear her pulse thundering at him from inside her body. Her body…

His moments of confusion were his downfall. Immediately, he found himself surrounded on all sides by pulsating, grinding, blood-filled bodies.

Cordelia pressed herself against his back and raked her fingers through his hair while Fred rubbed his chest. Wesley licked and nipped at his left ear while Gunn was busy running hand slowly down his right leg and stroking his cheek.

"It's…it's not," he could feel himself losing his senses and sinking into the mindless frenzied pleasure. "Something…happening. Wesley…demon?"

"Lust bunny," Wesley giggled into his ear. The Watcher's hot breath sent even more delicious tingles down Angel's spine.

"No…I…" the vampire tried to clarify himself but Wesley pressed a finger over his lips.

"Aphrodisia Leporidae," he clarified in a sultry tone, "often called the 'lust bunny' demon. Causes uncontrollable lustful urges in all who come within it's influence range. Spread widely throughout the world, but a full nest is rumored to be in Las Vegas." His eyes brightened. "We should go to Vegas."

"Knew…it…" Angel managed to gasp out as Wesley returned and began to lick his neck.

"You know, they said it would be really tough to get you to give in, but I'm still impressed." A foreign voice interrupted his descent into pure lust and longing. He managed to flop his head over so he could see what was happening beyond the orgy around him.

Sitting on top of the round sofa in the lobby was Cordelia's new pet rabbit. But as he watched, it stretched and morphed until squatting on top of the furniture was an extremely androgynous youth with pure white hair and sparkling pink eyes. It's nose twitched slightly.

"Not very many peopleand I include demons and vampires in that statementcould deny their lust for this long. Not with all those delicious little opportunities."

"What?" Angel murmured, inhaling the scent from Cordelia's shampoo.

"I mean, I covered all the bases," the youth continued, shaking it's head in amazement and ticking off the types on it's fingers while it named them, "I had the virginal female. The gentle male. The fierce male. The experienced female. And you just ignore all of them, even now. Wow. Really…I salute you." And it did, mockingly. "Guess I'll have to get my paws dirty after all."

And it hopped down off the seat and strode purposefully toward the knot of bodies. At some unseen signal, the four humans melted away into their own circle of lust, leaving Angel panting, barely able to stand. The Aphrodisia Leporidae sighed, as if forced to do something not wholly unpleasant, but certainly uninteresting. It pushed his legs and, in his weakened state, he tumbled backward onto the floor.

The youth then walked over him and sat down, straddling his chest.

"I never have to get involved," it complained, sensually stroking his face, even while it ranted. "Oh well, guess it keeps my skills sharp."

"Why…?" He trailed off as the demon stuck slender, nimble fingers into his mouth which effectively stifled him and distracted him as he began to suck on them.

"A visa." It told him, stretching it's legs backwards so it lay flat against him now and began to roll it's hips against his abdomen. "You go bad, the big W&H gives me an interdimensional visa."

"Mmmf?" Angel asked.

"Well, duh." The demon now seemed thoroughly tired with him. "Go anywhere I want, spreading mindless lust throughout reality? What more could a bunny want?"

Angel closed his eyes, trying to anchor his mind. He could not give in. He would not go bad, not because of some demon working for Wolfram & Hart. He was a Champion. He could deny lust. Almost every day since he had his soul returned, he held firm in denying his bloodlust. This was no different, he told himself. It was just majick. It wasn't real. The powerful feelings coursing through his dead body were not real.

"Oh come on," the demon complained, leaning in and running a small pink tongue up his cheek. "Quit all this denying. You'll be so much happier if you just give into the damn lust!"

To Be Continued….?