Chapter 33: Unexpected Endings

The sun was rising at a slow and leisure pace, as though it did not really want to force the glorious moon out of its throne. Or at least that was how my uncle would have described the scene… I have never been much of a morning person so every morning is kinda miserable for me. However, this morning was not so bad – I had a certain blonde and magnificent elf to thank for this.

I stretched my back when the sun made its official conquer of the moon, "aww poop… morning…"

"Yes, Phryne, it is."

Of course after all the time of being around Legolas, I was still not used to his silent appearances, "Legolas! What have I told you about sneaking up on me?!"

"'Make some noise when entering.'" My adorable elf rolled his eyes (something he picked up from me) and turned away. "meleth nin, you might want to cover up."

It was then that I noticed the sheets gathered at my waist and my chest completely bare. The sight brought back memories of the previous night and all the pleasures… unfortunately, interrupted due to some minor political emergency he was needed for.

"Oh god!" I quickly pulled the sheets up to cover myself, making Legolas laugh as he toyed with his tunic.

"We are married, Phryne, I do not understand what you have to be modest about." He turned back around, slowly pulling off his tunic in one sweep – Yes, as you would imagine, I was practically drooling at his perfectly toned muscles and overall yummy-ness.

"Le – Le – Legolas, put your hunk, I – I mean shirt on!" I was blushing bright red and my mind completely went haywire when he crawled into the bed.

He pulled me into his arms with his mischievous smile, "I ordered for them to let us be for a while, are you sure you want me to cover up?"

"Mmm…" At this point my mind went into a haze, so I shall not recount the kisses he placed on my neck and shoulders leading to other naughty actions. However, I should probably give you a quick update as to what is going on.

Legolas and I were married not long after the love was professed, much to the displeasure of quite a few people (including Pippin and a certain little brother of Ethan) – while others merely smiled sadly at our fate or rejoiced. Pippin had completely ignored and avoided me after my resurrection, until I hunted him down and talked sense into him. I gave him a high-five for giving Legolas a good lashing when I could not, and assured him that he was forever my favorite hobbit. Éowyn was alright, she found joy in her children and often spoke to me about her plans for them – Oh my! And she made a startling revelation! Let us travel back to that day while Legolas and I, ahem, finish up in our bedroom.

Éowyn and I were sitting out in the central garden talking about her kids – or more like Éowyn was talking and I was listening while making a flower crown.

"I think Angel and Miguel, after their father, would be great names – if they are two boys. Two girls would be great as well! Leonor, after his mother, and Miranda, after his grandmother! I personally would love if it was a boy and girl, Miguel and Miranda! Oh but whatever gender they turn out to be, I would love them nonetheless!" Éowyn was rubbing her huge belly with a fond expression as she spoke about her plans. I would have told her that she was going to have two boys – my journey through their life stream revealed this to me – but she wanted to keep it a surprise.

I examined her growing belly and a thought struck, "Éowyn… is it wise to be blatantly admitting that well… my uncle is their father?"

"What?!" Éowyn looked at me as though she could rip my face off, scaring me enough to rush through my next part.

"I mean, they are being born out of wedlock, is that not improper?"

"My babies should be proud of their father! And for your information, they were conceived in love and wedlock!"

"But…" I was terribly confused, when were they married? "You two… married?" I have always been rather slow, but this time I did not want to believe the conclusion I was coming to. Éowyn's expression explained it all to me, they had married in secret. "Why haven't you told me??! Why marry without informing me?! He was my uncle! I can not believe you two went behind my back!"

"Phryne… please," Éowyn's worried tears moved me slightly, enough for me to pause a bit in my oncoming rant, "we… well, we did it in secrecy – only King Elessar, my uncle, and Gandalf knew! They were the only witnesses!"

"Why was I not invited?!!" As you can imagine, I was terribly hurt and I'm sure Éowyn felt worse than guilty.

"We were going to, but you were rather drunk and off with Legolas... and Kings' testimony would hold greater power than, well… your's…"

"He never told me… you could have told me!" I did not bother to stop the tears running down my cheeks, why would my beloved uncle not share this with me?

"We did not want to hurt your feelings, Phryne, we were going to have a bigger wedding after the war, but… well…" Éowyn looked down at her hands in shame and sadness.

I was pacing in absolute hurt and fury, this felt like a great betrayal. I thought back to the night Éowyn claimed to have gotten married with Miguel, and then I remembered. It was the same night I had gotten completely wasted and pretty much raped Legolas – not that he minded. "Oh god… he really did not have time to tell me… nor was I in any shape to attend a secret wedding…" I looked at the crying Éowyn and sighed, "I am sorry…"

She smiled gently at me, looking absolutely like a goddess. No wonder my uncle fell in love with her. "I am sorry as well."

And so we hugged and made up, I was never one to hold a grudge for too long – especially when that grudge was directed at the woman carrying the children of my beloved uncle. The children that would not be branded by rumors and unkind whispers due to 'propriety' and customs.

Children… oh yes, this brings another topic I should probably discuss. First we should check if Legolas and I are done. Nope, we are not. Naughty, naughty! Well, this topic of children takes us to the night after Legolas and I… after we… well, after we slept together for the first time. Yes, we did sleep together before we were married by Man's standards. A standard that Legolas did not understand, he said that when elves lay together they complete a private ritual that automatically binds them. Which is understandable with elves, I mean, they only love one person for their entire lives. Humans, on the other hand, are rather fickle; therefore need the elaborate wedding ceremony to force and keep two people together for life – well, until divorce is invented. Anyhow, so after completing a small ritual (mainly professing to the elf gods this and that and burning some seemingly random plants) we slept together under the open sky. It was quite the marvelous experience (not that sleeping with the love of your life never is), probably enhanced by the small pots burning an unknown substance in them. Oh dear, I seem to have ranted again, I apologize.

So after I had the best night of my life, Legolas and I laid in the grass (well after the initial act I asked Legolas to lay a blanket down for us), far from the peering eyes, and simply enjoyed the bright stars.

He placed a kiss on my brow in utter bliss, "Meleth nin, you have brought much happiness into my life."

"Legolas…" at this point I did not know what to say, I could not formulate words properly – well all except for the phrase that brought a smile to his face every time – "I love you." And yes, it unfailingly brought a smile to his face – actually, it made him move on top of me faster than I could see. "Oh dear!"

But he did not do anything, he merely examined my eyes with an intensity that no human would ever be able to achieve. In fact, had I not been absolutely in love with him, I would not have been able to maintain eye contact. "Meleth nin, I-" his expression suddenly changed to one of confusion and he sat up, pulling me onto his lap.

"Legolas?" I asked nervously.

"Your life stream… it is flowing incredibly slow, it is even a different shade than other humans." He peered deep into my eyes, I felt as though he could see into every fiber of my soul. Later I would find out (from Gandalf) that the binding ritual opened up my heart for his examination even more than was normal (yes, somehow through the ritual we were connected), and that is why he could not see how slow my life stream really was until after we the deed was done. The color change had occurred when my cleric spirit 'died,' really her spirit merely dispersed and some of it bonded with my life stream permanently – hence the extension. Basically, the portal and my old cleric spirit were to blame.

"What are you talking about?" I, at the time, was still terribly confused.

"Every being has a life stream, as you know, well elves can sense these. It is how I realized Éowyn was expecting children. Yours is slower than other humans, your whole aging process has been slowed down."

The shock overwhelmed me, I realized that I was given more time with Legolas but… it also made me wonder, "If my whole aging has been slowed, then does that mean my entire body slowed?"

"Well, it conserves more energy and therefore slows aging."

"So I can not have children?" my question made his eyes widen in sudden realization.

"No… you can not…" Were I not so close, I would have missed his sad words.

"I - I am b… barren?" my tears choked the words in my throat.

"I am sorry…" Legolas hugged me tightly, his grief pouring from his being.

I cried into his shoulder, feeling like a complete failure as a woman. Legolas had told me before then that he wanted children with me, I had laughed and joked about evil trolls… but deep in my heart, I wanted kids with him too. Now the privilege was taken from me and I felt terribly empty. The rest of the night, we made bittersweet love. Never again did we breach the subject, instead choosing to look at the positive of having more time together.

Oh! Shall we fast forward through time to the morning we opened with?

I was lying in Legolas's arms with practically half my body on top of him. "Love," I murmured, "Aren't we going to be late to little Miguel's and Angel's third birthday celebration."

He began to nod slowly and then realized what I had said, and sat up in a bolt. "We are! I shall summon help for you to dress immediately. We must hurry." I laughed and stretched yet again, my absent mindedness was rubbing off on him. "Meleth nin," at his husky voice I looked at him inquisitively, "moving like that is not motivation for me to be punctual to the celebration." His hungry eyes running down my body resulted in me blushing bright red – amazing how after how long we were married, I still blushed so easily.

I covered myself with the sheets and went to find my robe as he pulled a rope to summon servants to help me dress.

At the celebration, Éowyn gave me a knowing look before continuing with the feasting and speaking to Faramir. She had married Faramir the year prior, for the simple reason of providing a father for her children. I did not blame her, besides, Faramir was a good man with good intentions. He knew full well that Éowyn would always be in love with Miguelito and still married her. She cared for him enough for a functional marriage, but he was no Miguel.

Afterwards, I was walking down the beach with Éowyn and her boys. "Well that was quite a feast! King Elessar went all out!"

Éowyn giggled slightly, "you and your odd expressions."

I shrugged and almost tripped over my own feet, bringing laughter to little Angel's face. I pinched his cheek fondly before placing him on the ground to hold his hand as he walked – I did not want to drop him. Angel was always the bright and cheerful one, while little Miguel (walking next to Éowyn) was the more thoughtful and quiet one.

"So," Éowyn began, "I wonder what kept you this morning."

"Éowyn!" My embarrassed face gave me away completely.

"Oh I tease," Éowyn laughed.

I cleared my throat, still slightly embarrassed, "I heard that Faramir plans to visit Legolas and I in our hom- ahh" a sudden sharp pain in my head made me stop mid-sentence.

"Phryne?" Éowyn's concerned voice went unheard, the pain completely blocked out everything. It soon faded and became a presence.

I looked up at Éowyn's concerned face, I felt Legolas's worry over me through our connection, the boys tugged on my dress, but I did not pay them any heed. Éowyn looked up to call for help, but her words never made it out. She saw something down the beach. I followed her gaze to the figure lying in the distance. It looked like a classic pirate. The figure tried to stand up but quickly lost balance and fell back into the sand. Without any warning Éowyn dashed off to meet the person.

"Wait," I whispered and forced my legs to follow her, the boys holding on to my skirt to lead them. Once I was close enough I stopped in shock, the presence in my mind fading to a soft hum. I could not believe what I was seeing. Dressed in classic pirate garb, my uncle coughed up water onto Éowyn's dress.


A/N: And so this is the end of the story! After all this time, it has finally ended. Wow, I do not even know if you guys remember the story… I hope I have not been completely forgotten! You were all great, anyhow. There is a new story, by the way, and I shall post it soon. Actually, it's mostly finished so you won't have to wait years for the last chapter of it like in this one. It is a PotC fic, not surprising, so be sure to look for it! Thanks for all your support! Review please, on the final chapter of My Uncle, My Cat, and I. :D