Chp. 22- Fantasizing the Future
Thanks to everyone that reviewed chapter twenty-one...
Finally I stop the water, and sigh with satisfaction as I sink myself into my warm bubble bath. I relish in the feel of the warm water licking at my body, soothing my aching muscles. I had quite the workout with Draco the other night, what with six different rounds of shagging from the time we started and the time we ended. I am so not complaining...It's a good sore actually.
Actually it's a fantastic sore in fact...I would love to be this sore every day if it included a couple shags each day with Draco. It's a great workout, not that I really need one. I have a very high metabolism, which keeps my body lithe and fit to this day. I take more after my dad than my mum...Most of my siblings take after my dad, except for the twins. They're more like my mum...Well at least in looks. My mum hates their mischievous ways with all her heart, but what can she really do? They never listen to her reprimands, no matter how many times they get grounded or yelled at. It's just who they are...
I'm lying there in my bathtub, letting the vanilla scent get soaked into my skin, and relaxing as much as I can before my stressful night. Finally after an hour of soaking in the tub, I get out and wrap a towel around myself.
I have a lot to do before I'm ready for the rose ceremony tonight, so I better get my bum right into gear. I have only two and a half hours left to get ready in...Well actually less than that, because Graham will expect me to be downstairs fifteen minutes early. I sigh as I look at my reflection. I have so much work to do...
I give myself a small smile of encouragement before tucking the end of my towel inside so that it will stay put. I grab my make-up bag and start applying foundation. I watch my reflection as I transform myself from the young, fresh-faced woman face to the sophisticated woman who always looks impeccable. That's the one part of my job I don't like. I'm not myself when I'm up on that runway. I'm flawless when I'm up there. I'm wearing a ton of make-up and my hair is in weird styles I'd never wear out in real life. If I could change anything about my job, it would be that I could go up on that runway and show the real me.
No make-up, no crazy hairstyles, no model strutting. Just plain old Ginny Weasley. Without my make-up, I look like a young girl. Because that's what I am. I have freckles splattered across my nose, cheeks, and the rest of my body. The model agency covers them up to make my skin flawless looking. My deep red hair when it's in its natural waves, cascading down my back against my creamy white skin, adds to my young disposition. Everything about my natural self screams young girl. My body, my face, my freckles, my hair, my clothing that I wear on normal days. I'm a jeans and t-shirt kind of girl when it comes down to it. I like comfort over fashion.
Which is insane, given the fact that I'm a model. Fashion is much more important than comfort when it comes to modeling. When I have to retire in a couple years, because I'll be old too old to be on the runway, I can start my life. Get a stable job where looks aren't everything, get married, have children, and be happy.
The man I picture as my husband smirks at me in my mind. I can't help but wonder what would happen if Draco and I got married. Would our parents allow us? Would we have six children or none at all? Would we be madly in love till our dying days? Or were we too different, because of our backgrounds, that we couldn't make it work? I was the poor Pureblood by birth that lived in a house that wasn't exactly a mansion, and I had to live with six brothers, always receiving all the hand me downs that I could. Draco was the spoiled only child of very wealthy Purebloods who never wanted for anything. He had house elves at his beck and call. He probably never had to lift a finger when he was growing up.
I had worked my butt off every day to help my mum cook and clean. I was always busy doing something, and hardly had free time. I still did the hard work, but I also had money now and could hire someone if there wasn't time to do the work. Occasionally, I still liked getting my hands dirty and working hard, because it gave you satisfaction to finish something.
So I could sit here and fantasize about Draco being my husband as much as I wanted, but I wouldn't know how things would turn out unless we actually got hitched. And as much as I loved Draco, I didn't know if he would be ready for marriage. He'd always seemed like a non-relationship type of guy, and despite that, he'd declared his love to me before making love with me six times the other night.
But would he be able to put the past behind us, and start a relationship with me when this was all over? Would he propose ever, and marry me? Would he start a family with me? Or would he dump me on my ass after some time, concluding that we were wrong for each other?
I could easily see myself with him, happy as could be. But I could also see myself in tears as he turned his back on me. Draco was unpredictable like every other man out there, even more so given his background. He'd been in maybe one or two serious relationships throughout his life, but those relationships were insignificant if you brought his thousands of flings and no-strings attached relationships i.e. friends with benefits. Although Draco didn't have very many female friends, because he'd shagged all the girls, and then broke their hearts when he told them he was done.
What if he did that to me? I'd be completely heartbroken, that's what. I'd never really had my heart broken, so I didn't know how or if I could handle it. What if I couldn't recover? What if I was ruined for life after Draco Malfoy broke my heart?
But if I didn't take a chance on Draco, would I always wonder what if? I'd always thought Draco handsome. I'd entertained the idea several times about having a relationship with him, even before this show. So why was I running scared now? I was finally getting the chance to choose Draco over any of the other men, and I was beyond scared.
I was terrified!
I wanted to be with him, but I was scared that he'd end up hurting me. What if someone better looking came along? Would he dump me to be with her? That was, if he even decided to stay with me…
I exhaled a shaky breath before shaking my head. I really needed to stop thinking about the future. I said I'd live in the moment, and that's what I was going to do. I'd worry about Draco breaking my heart when that time came, if it came. I stared at my reflection and saw my eyes fill with tears at the prospect of Draco not wanting to be with me. After the night we'd spent together, I wanted to believe that he'd be there for me for the rest of my life. That after his confession and tender love making, he'd want to stay by my side. That he'd never leave me, no matter what.
I blinked several times, willing my tears to disappear. Finally my eyes cleared up, and I gave myself a shaky smile that threatened to dissolve at the slightest problem. I finished putting my bronzer, lip gloss, mascara, and eye shadow on.
With my make-up out of the way, I got working on my hair. I decided to curl my hair into big ringlets. My shorter hair towards my face was curled into my face, and the rest cascaded down my back. I grabbed a long black dress from my wardrobe, and unzipped it before sliding it up over my hips. I untied the halter-top and retied it once it was around my neck. I zipped myself up before resituating the top to make sure my breasts were covered.
I turned around to fix my hair, loving how my deep auburn hair clashed against my skin and complimented the black silk dress. My hair fell to the middle of my back, and my dress dipped down to my lower back. So you could still see some of my skin.
I slipped some black stiletto heels on before turning fully around in front of a mirror, checking my appearance. When I was satisfied with my dress and appearance, I checked the alarm clock. It was nearly six thirty, which meant Graham would be here within fifteen minutes to give me the lowdown on tonight's rose ceremony.
And while I was looking forward to the end of this all, and the fact that I'd find a guy for me out of this, I was scared that I might get rid of the wrong guy during this process. That I'd settle on someone that was wrong for me, like Draco. What if we couldn't work out our past differences? It would like seeing a plane crash and burn right before m eyes. This whole thing would have been for nothing. So did I dare fantasize about Draco and my own futures together, or did I go with a safer man? Someone who seemed more reliable or trustworthy. Someone who was less likely to break my heart.
I was nibbling on my lower lip when the doorbell rang. I grabbed the train of my dress and hurried down the stairs as quickly as my feet would take me. I could hear my heels clicking against the marble flooring, as I called "I'm coming Graham" towards the doorway.
I threw open the door and gave the host a big smile, but my smile stopped part of the way when I realized it wasn't Graham. My half smile dissolved completely as I looked into the eyes of the man standing before me, luggage in hand. What was he doing here?
That's it for this chapter! Let me know what you thought. You'll see who the mystery man is in the next update. The rose ceremony will be in the next chapter as well, so you'll see who goes and who stays. Please leave me a review, telling me what you thought.