Due to popular request here I go again.

All copyrights are reserved to their rightful owners, specifically of course referring to Park Sang-Sun and Jo Lun-ha. As these characters that I've grown to love so much don't belong to me they belong to them. I only borrow them on occasion. br br

P.S. I am not making money off this. I have my own amateur characters for that. Thank you.

My mind is not my own anymore, not since the first day we met, but I have to move on now. I have to discover myself, who I am without you. I hope when I find that person I'll be happy with who he is.

My name is Carnelian. I was the perfect jewel of my kingdom, beautiful, strong, and I might add just a tad bit arrogant. Then again though what jewel isn't. Now however that perfect gem has been chipped, layer by layer the core has been revealed to everyone but me, and you. I've tried time and time again to let you know that it doesn't matter to me who you are Lapis, or Lazuli. It doesn't matter. Now though more then ever my words fall upon deaf ears, you couldn't hear me now even if you wanted to, even if you cared. Your affection was more then I ever could have deserved, that's why I never pushed you, I didn't dare think, nor dream, I didn't even hope that you could feel the same about me.

You'll be glad to know that everyone's still here though not all are happy, Lothestie still won't give up, and I can't give in, not out of sorrow, or grief not because I need to hold someone, even if just for a night. That wouldn't be fair to her, or to her feelings. And once I don't think I would have cared if she wanted to shower me her affections, but not now. Now that you're gone, my entire world has changed without my consent. I've become more of a babysitter then a prince, or a thief, not that I mind too terribly I wasn't very good at either of my previous professions. However I can't help but wish that it was a child that didn't look so amazingly heartbreakingly like you. The skin's lighter, the hair more red, but so like you as well. They even named him Lapis. That almost broke my heart further you know.

We were never actually able to find your body that thought still tears at my mind, I …my hands still have scars from my desperate digging, but it was to no avail. They stopped me from looking eventually, drug me away crying and screaming, not like me I know, but that's what you do to me. That's why though, why I made this little shrine to you. Because it feels like if I come here enough then just maybe someday you'll hear what I, the real Carnelian have to say.

I love you, you know. I'm almost certain you do, and I'm sorry that I always just came off as some horrible pervert to you. I do love you though, so much more then I could ever really tell. It's been nine years, I still come here everyday, still think of you almost as often as that too. Every hour of everyday you cross my mind at least once, and even then more often then that you have a habit of staying there. I hope you've thought of this Habit at least once since you've been gone. I love you and I'll never forget you.

Goodbye my perfect Lapis Lazuli.Goodbye my perfect gem.


Hope everyone enjoyed that. I also hope I didn't get to angsty for anyone. Reviews are alwas welcome.

Your author, Jared