A Harry Potter Fanfiction
By Jewel

Disclaimer: Harry Potter and its characters were created by JK Rowling and are copyrighted to the rightful owners. There is no copyright infringement intended by this fanfiction.

Summary: "Too late he tries to cover his arm, but she catches it and pushes the robe away again. She stares at it. He looks at her, looking at his dark mark." A Slytherin-Gryffindor romance. (Be prepared for angst.)

Rated R for language and adult themes. Slight AU of Harry's Fifth Year.

See author's notes at the bottom.

For Redcandle17, who finally wore me down and made me write for her 'ship!

(FanfictionNet has messed up the spacing, so please forgive me for that.)

Addiction (1/1)

How exactly it started, she doesn't know. She can't decide if it started in their Fourth Year when they first kissed, or in the Sixth Year, when they first fucked. Finally she decides it doesn't matter. She's in love with him. When she first realizes this she almost becomes physically sick. In fact she gets back into bed and doesn't leave for the rest of the day. But eventually summer ends and she has to return to Hogwarts. She has to go back and face him. Has to go back and deal with this.

She thinks that maybe, with He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named resurrected, this year will be different. But there he is at the train station, and suddenly she can't think anymore. Any intentions of breaking things off fly out her head. She says goodbye to her parents and get on the train. Sits with her friends, talks about trivial things. In the back of her mind she's thinking about him. Wondering if, maybe, he's found an empty compartment and waiting for her. She thinks, maybe she should look for one. Then her friends are teasing her about the anxious look on her face, and she laughs and abandons the idea. There's time enough to see him when they arrive at school.

Weeks pass and they fall back into a comfortable routine. Dark classrooms, deserted corridors in the catacombs beneath the castle that she thinks no one might even know about, once even in the astronomy tower. They're horny teenagers, it's not too difficult to find a secluded place.

Sometimes, on weekends, she'll go to his room and stay over the night. Or almost all night. Then when the sun is creeping over the horizon she'll sneak back into her common room and tip-toe into the dormitory. Her roommates are sleeping. Even if they weren't, they'd only giggle and give her knowing looks.

If they only knew.

They all knew she had a fuck buddy somewhere in the castle. They probably thought it was a Ravenclaw. Maybe even a Hufflepuff. If they ever knew she was crawling into bed with a Slytherin they'd look at her like she was sick. And maybe she was.

After all, he was the enemy. In more than one sense.

Still, she can't seem to stay away. Before she knows it Christmas is here and the castle is drained of its students. She goes home to her parents, but once again not even the distance can take him away from her mind. Like with summer she's impatient for it to end. Inexplicably she wants to get back to him.

It's madness, she knows this.

If he only knew, he'd probably laugh hard enough to kill himself. She takes grim satisfaction in this thought. But it doesn't change anything. She's completely, inescapably, in love with him.

Then the storm breaks.

The first day back she's so eager to see him that she sneaks away from dinner and goes to the Slytherin dormitory.

She enters his room and there he is, pacing the short length of his room, his arms clasped behind his back. Black hair falls into his eyes, obscuring his pale, blue gaze. He sees her and stops.

She doesn't know why, but she smiles. He frowns, looking at her like he's trying to solve a mystery.

Then she doesn't care, she just misses his touch. It's only been a couple of weeks, but she feels like she's been trapped on an island for a century, deprived of human contact. She's that desperate for him.

Then she's kissing him, and he's not resisting. Eventually his large hands move to cup her head, his fingers sinking into her hair. Then her eyes are open, her gaze caught on the raw, dark bruise on his forearm.

Too late he tries to cover his arm, but she catches it and pushes the robe away again. She stares at it. He looks at her, looking at his dark mark.

And suddenly she's thinking again. Dozens of thoughts are swirling through her head. Her future is crashing down around her ears. He doesn't say anything.

She drops his arm as though it burned her to touch it. She turns to flee the room. But then his arm is around her waist and he's pulling her back to him. Then he's kissing her and she kisses him back. Before she knows it, they're on the bed and her eyes are closed. His arm is resting beside her head, trapping a lock of her long, dark hair.

He doesn't say anything. She doesn't say anything. And when it's over she doesn't hesitate. She puts her robes back on and leaves.

It doesn't stop. He's the enemy in every sense and she still can't keep herself away.

The week he goes missing she's more worried than she's ever been in her life. When she hears them talking about it, it's all she can do not to smack them. This bothers her more than anything else. Her defensiveness about him catches her off guard, and she stops denying that she loves him.

A week without him, she hopes this can rid her of the insane obsession. But then he's found and before she can think about it she's sneaking into the hospital wing at night and sitting by his side. He doesn't say anything. The first night he just looks at her. It's like he's seeing her for the first time. The second night he recognizes her, but all he does is stare into her eyes.

This sends her into a panic, and she doesn't return the next night. But then two days later she's overcome by the urge to see him and she's back at his bedside. And he asks why she keeps coming. She shrugs. How to tell him the truth? She decides not to, and just sits there, talking to him about the latest Transfiguration assignment.

When he's well enough to return to his dormitory and classes, they're back at it again.

Soon the year is almost over and she's thinking about the future again. She needs to break herself of this habit, she thinks. It's much to dangerous to continue outside of Hogwarts. More so considering the fact that he's a Death Eater and she just wants to get job with the Ministry. Maybe something with international relations. She wonders, maybe if she goes aboard to Germany or Egypt or even China, if that will be enough distance to get him out of her system.

She doesn't even ask him about his duties as a Death Eater. It bothers her that she isn't concerned in the least that her lover is an evil bastard bent on helping a vile wizard enslave the world. She wonders if maybe there's something wrong with her. Maybe she is sick. Maybe she was sorted into the wrong house. Maybe she should turn her wand on herself and end it all right here.

She decides to go cold turkey, though it hasn't worked in the past.

It surprises her when he seeks her out. It shocks her when he asks why she's stopped coming to him. It leaves her breathless that he cares.

And then they're locked in the vicious cycle again.

Graduation arrives and she thinks, maybe this is it. They haven't made plans for anything beyond quick sex in the dark corridors at Hogwarts. After this is over, she thinks, maybe it's finished.

Then Dumbledore is wishing them good fortune in all their future endeavors. And he's offering his deepest regrets that he didn't try hard enough to help those lost along the way. And this confuses her, makes her wonder if maybe the old headmaster hasn't lost his mind after all. Then she sees them, creeping in at the back of the Great Hall. And panic sets in.

The Great Hall is brimming with students, parents, professors and aurors. Then there's old Mad Eye Moody rattling names off a list and aurors are arresting students. Arresting Slytherins.

And her worse fear comes true.

Mad Eye calls his name. And a middle-aged, balding auror with a fierce scowl steps forward and points his wand at her lover.

And it's all she can to do keep her heart from stopping. To keep from leaping up and betraying herself and the sick, dirty girl that she is.

Then it's over, and the aurors have left and he's gone.

And she still can't escape him.

She wonders if maybe she isn't insane. Hopes that maybe she's under the imperius curse. But she's not. And before she knows it, she's standing in Azkaban, debating that point of sanity again. And she's being escorted to his cell.

He looks her at, genuine surprise in his eyes. She wonders if maybe all along this has just been an infatuation on her part. She starts to berate herself for thinking like nothing more than a naive schoolgirl. Which is what she was. She chides herself for thinking he might have been her soulmate, the way she can't breathe without him. Except he is. And she's hopelessly lost.

What are you doing here? He asks, not looking altogether unhappy to see her.

I don't know, she answers honestly. And then she says it. The thing she's been afraid of for a year. I'm in love with you.

And he laughs. You are such a Gryffindor, he says. I thought you were marginally better than the rest, but I guess I was wrong. You're risking a lot coming here. You shouldn't have.

I wanted to see you. Tell me that you don't care at all and I'll go.

And he doesn't say anything. So she continues, I know you're a Death Eater. I couldn't begin to imagine what you've done over the last year to warrant a sentence to Azkaban, but I can't stop how I feel. And I needed you to know that.

Maybe not so much of a Gryffindor after all, he says, to come here and say something like that.

I just wanted you to know that I cared, and that things could have been different.

Then a week later the other Death Eaters break the former Hogwarts' students out of Azkaban. And she has her job at the Ministry, working with the Department of Magical Games and Sports.

And Montague doesn't seek her out. And for once Angelina doesn't go looking for him.

And just like that it's over.


Author's Notes:

Yes, this an Angelina/Montague 'fic. Though, I suppose, it could probably be read as any Gryffindor-Slytherin 'ship. I think there might be a sequel to this, but I'm not sure as yet.

As always, leave a review and tell me what you thought. I love hearing feedback!