By jiffy pop
A/N: Every fan-author should write a drunk anime fluff. Even if it's over done, it's so much fun.
Please review if you have the time. I always appriciate feedback.
Naruto definitely could have thought of better places to spend his Friday nights then in a dank cellar of a restaurant with his biggest rival, Sasuke, hiding from Ino and Saskura of all people. Not that he really understood it all.
"Geez, my arm hurts. You didn't have to grab me so hard, Sasuke," he hissed over at the dark-haired boy crouched next to the door they had entered from and listening intently.
"Shh!" Sasuke said, motioning for Naruto to be quiet with a quick jerk of his hand.
Naruto rolled his eyes. "C'mon, Sasuke. Give it up already. They're gone!"
"Shut it, dobe," Sasuke warned, giving Naruto a sideways glare of death to which Naruto crossed his arms to.
"I will not 'shut it,' and don't call me dobe, idiot!" He then winced. "Damnit! You had better apologize for my arm! I think you might have broke it!"
"I didn't break your arm, Naruto. Quit exaggerating," Sasuke snapped, turned himself completely around to face the loud blond boy. If the girls were in the area, they would have been on top of them by now with how loud Naruto was being. "Why do you always have to be so loud? If it wasn't for you jabbering your mouth off, I wouldn't even be in here right now."
"Well, excuse me. If you were trying to go for quiet, you shouldn't have ran right into me like you did. It's natural impulse to shout out when someone tackles you."
"Shout? You hollered fit to kill then proceeded to curse at the top of your lungs after you saw it was me! I had no choice but to drag you in here." Sasuke was holding back his annoyance barely.
"Yeah, speaking of – why they hell were you even running away from Ino and Sakura? If this has something to do with your sick love games, you had no right bringing me into the middle of it." Naruto felt a slight rise of red in his cheeks at the thought of Sakura chasing after Sasuke and not him.
"They weren't love games, idiot. Those two have been-" Sasuke hesitated. "You know what? Forget it. Let's just get out of here before they come back." He turned from Naruto frowning and tried the door only to find it wouldn't give. After jiggling the handle for a bit he concluded that it had locked from the outside. "Oh, great!" he muttered fiercely.
"Don't tell me it's locked," Naruto said, coming up behind him to try. 'As if me trying just a few seconds ago didn't confirm it's locked already…' Sasuke thought with annoyance, moving over to let Naruto have a turn.
"Damnit, let us out already!" Naruto shouted at the door uselessly, giving it a nasty tug. Naturally he pulled too hard. The door handle came off with a loud bang and sent Naruto flying back with it in hand right into Sasuke.
"Ouff!" Sasuke grunted as Naruto slammed him back into the ground. He closed his eyes for a moment, letting the dust settle before opening them again. The first thing in his vision was Naruto's yellow head lying on his chest. "Idiot, get off me!" he said furiously when he felt something tickle his thigh. Naruto was using it prop himself up while his other hand was holding...
"Naruto, did you just rip off the door handle?" Sasuke demanded as Naruto rolled off him and got up. Sasuke got to his feet as well.
"Maybe," Naruto said in a slightly apprehensive voice.
"Don't call me that!"
"Well, now how are we going to get out?"
"Kick down the door?"
"And have Ino and Sakura hear it?"
"Kick it down quietly?" Naruto remedied.
Sasuke spared him a withering look.
"Well, fine. You think of something then." Naruto said sullenly.
Sasuke did just that. "How about we sit here for a little while then, once we're sure they're gone, we'll break down the door... quietly."
"Are you sure the owner won't mind?"
"Who cares!" Sasuke said. "We're ninjas. We'll be long gone before he finds out."
"I still don't see why I have to wait to break down the door. Sakura and Ino are your problem. Not mine," Naruto said rebelliously.
"'Cause I'll beat your face in if you don't go along with it," Sasuke threatened, narrowing his eyes.
Naruto looked at Sasuke with a bored expression. "Oh, I'm so scared." He sat down on a crate. "How did you guys wind up here, anyway? I mean, a restaurant seems like an odd place to pursue someone."
"They ambushed me so that they could take my picture,'" Sasuke muttered, taking a seat on a crate opposite to Naruto. "They've been trying to take a picture of me all week. While I'm training, walking... Doesn't matter what, really. It's getting to the point where I can't have a moment's peace alone! So when they showed up here, I decided to ditch them. Trouble is they're rather hard to get rid of."
"What a hard life you lead," Naruto said with a tone of jealousy slipping into his speech.
"Look," Sasuke snapped, "I didn't tell you that to get sympathy, okay? You ask me so I answered."
"Hmph," Naruto snorted, pushing himself off from the crate. "I wonder what's in here, anyway?" His eyes lit with curiosity as he explored a stack of boxes nearby. Sasuke stayed where he was, giving an exasperated sigh. "Ah!" Naruto shouted, clearly having found something. "Look what I found."
"What did you find?" Sasuke asked, though he didn't care in the slightest, really.
"Hehe." Naruto pulled out a large green bottle from one of the boxes. Sasuke couldn't read the label since the room was so poorly lit, but Naruto solved him the problem of not knowing. "Sake!"
"Don't you dare drink that, Naruto. It's stealing," Sasuke ordered, not bothering to add on the fact that they were underage and the idea of a drunk Naruto made his ears sting from just imagining how much it might increase the volume of Naruto's voice.
"Oh, yeah. Right, and destroying public property isn't a crime, too?" Naruto retorted back, already opening the bottle.
"Naruto, I'm warning you-" Sasuke began.
Naruto took a long swig of the drink then started to cough and sputter.
"God! That's disgusting!" he said with a shake of his head to ward off the bad taste.
"Well, d'uh. It's sake. What did you expect it to taste like? Ramen," Sasuke said sarcastically. A twitch in the corner of his mouth betrayed his amusement.
"Yeah, fine. Be sarcastic about it all. You'd gag too if you tried some."
"I would not."
"Would–" Sasuke stopped himself with a sigh of annoyance. "I'm not going to pursue this argument any longer."
"Fine then. Drink some and prove me wrong," Naruto challenged. Everything involving Naruto always seemed to end up a challenge. Sasuke was beginning to wonder if he was taking this rivalry thing a bit too far.
"If that'll get you to shut up," Sasuke said disdainfully. He motioned and the fox boy handed him the bottle. He opened it and sniffed it slightly, curious what it smelled like. The burning smell of alcohol overcame him for a second as he quickly pulled it away from his face.
"Quit stalling, already, and drink it!" Naruto urged. His eyes had taken on a disturbing gleam to them that Sasuke didn't particularly like.
"Shut up. I'm doing it," he growled, putting the bottle to his lips and swallowing some of its contents quickly. The fiery substance burned in his mouth and his immediate impulse was to spit it back out. He suddenly couldn't breath, and a cough bubbled up from his throat that he tried to repress and failed at.
The look of triumph on Naruto's face made Sasuke strongly want to break the bottle of sake over his head.
"Told you that you couldn't do it," Naruto mocked, taking the bottle back to try it again. He succeeded to not cough this time as he took another swallow.
"You barely drank any of it that time," Sasuke protested in annoyance, his face felt oddly warm.
"Whatever." Naruto drank again and failed in hiding his disgust as he whipped his face in his hand. "Your turn."
Sasuke took the bottle, and took a long deep drink of it, trying to keep his tongue as far away from the nasty taste as possible and swallowing it as quickly as he could. He put the bottle down and grinned at Naruto once the sickness in his stomach passed. "Try to beat that."
"Oh, it's on now." Naruto laughed.
Sasuke could see how flushed Naruto looked even in the darkness of the room. A little voice in the back of his brain wondered briefly if this was such a smart thing to do. Meanwhile, Naruto started chugging from the bottle.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
"We are fighting dreeaamers! Tali cowa dada something! Fighting dreamers! Dala de something!" Naruto was singing loudly with his body leaned heavily against the crate Sasuke was still sitting on. The bottle they had been drinking was somewhere on the opposite side of the room. It had rolled over there when Naruto kicked it on accident before falling over on the ground where he currently was residing.
"You're really, really drunk, Naruto," Sasuke pointed out unnecessarily, trying to ignore the fuzziness that surrounded his entire body and especially his brain. It seemed odd to say but it felt almost like it had gotten a lot heavier. "And you're really loud!" he added, after a thought.
Naruto stopped singing and rolled over to look up at Sasuke. "I'm sorry, Sasuke. I didn't mean to upset you. I just really like that song, and it struck me suddenly that it'd be really fun to sing. You should sing it too. It's a really good song. It goes something like this... We are fi—"
"You've been singing it for ten minutes now! I know how the song goes," Sasuke said, moving over to cover Naruto's mouth quickly with his hand, nearly falling off his seat and on top of Naruto as he did it. 'No more singing! No more!' his brain said.
Naruto tried to say something in Sasuke's hand. It tickled so Sasuke withdrew it.
"—such a jerk sometimes. You should get up from that crate already and find the bottle," Naruto said, oblivious that his first words had been muffled.
"You kicked it. You should go get it," Sasuke pointed out. "Besides, you're drunk. You don't need it anymore."
"No, I'm not!" Naruto said unconvincingly. "Besides, what about you? You don't look like you are at all," he pointed out, though it probably pained him to say it since it meant Sasuke was getting along better at something then him.
Sasuke didn't see the need in telling Naruto about how cloudy everything seemed to him right then. Not when it felt so good to for Naruto to acknowledge he was beating him in something. "Fine. I'll go get the bottle," he said, standing up.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Sasuke was confused, and it took a few seconds for him to wonder why he was sitting on the floor next to Naruto suddenly.
"Ooooh! Sasuke fell down!' Naruto laughed evilly in Sasuke's ear, draping his arm over his shoulder affectionately. "Guess he isn't as well off as I thought he was…"
Everything felt like it was spinning for some reason. "Shut up!" Sasuke said furiously to one of the Naruto heads swirling around his vision. "I just tripped, that's all."
"On what? Air?" Naruto laughed for an unnaturally long time at his joke.
Sasuke knew he should be angry, but he couldn't help smiling at the goofy expression Naruto was making. He really looked cute right then laughing like that.
"I'm going to go get the bottle now," Sasuke announced, feeling a lot hotter then he had been a few moments ago. Why was it so hot, anyway? Someone must've turned up the heater. Yes. That was it.
Sasuke pushed himself off of the ground and tried to stand again. The alcohol made him dizzy as its fuzzy influence went rushing up and down his arms and legs. He started walking as straight as he could towards the area the bottle had gone and made it to the bundle of plastic bags where he thought he saw it roll into. He leaned down and swatted the bags around to see between them. He felt a presence behind him and nearly jumped out of his skin when Naruto grabbed onto his waist hard and used him as a support.
"Lemme help some," Naruto volunteered with a slight slur in is voice. Sasuke didn't care how drunk he felt right now; he was convinced Naruto was more.
"How can you help me when you can barely stand on your own?" he asked, grabbing Naruto's arms and trying to support him in a more comfortable manner.
"I can stand on my own. See." Naruto pushed Sasuke's arms away and stood still for a moment before tottering to the side and stumbling back. He giggled in amusement at himself. "Okay. So I can't stand still for very long, but I can stand."
Sasuke laughed. Sasuke didn't know what was wrong with him or why he laughed exactly. It was just the sight of Naruto's staggering...
"Let's sit down before you break something," he said, taking Naruto's hand in case he fell down and leading him back towards his crate. He didn't feel like sitting down on it anymore, so he sat down on the floor with Naruto. Naruto was leaned up against Sasuke's abandoned seat for a moment then slid down until only his head was propped against it. That seemed uncomfortable for him, so he turned his body and found Sasuke's lap to rest his head on.
Sasuke should have probably minded such an invasion of his personal space, but the usual impulse to push Naruto away was replaced with a strange impulse to stroke Naruto's tangled mass of hair instead. Pointing out to himself that that would be very bad to attempt, Sasuke kept his hands to himself and tolerated Naruto's head on his thigh. It was kind of nice... In a weird sort of way that Sasuke didn't care to explore too deeply.
"Ne, Sasuke," Naruto said after a few moments of silence.
"What?" Sasuke asked.
"You remember that day in class? When we first were assigned teammates together..."
"Yeah. What about it?"
Naruto grew silent for a while. "Actually. No. Never mind... Forget it," he said finally.
"No, what? Tell me."
"No, really. It's stupid. Forget it."
Sasuke smiled again. It felt unnatural but good. "Almost everything you say is stupid, so go ahead and say it anyway."
"It's not important anymore. I shouldn't have brought it up."
"Just tell me already."
Naruto hesitated. "Well, it's just... I never apologized for the, you know... That day. When I—"
"When you what?" Sasuke asked.
"You know," Naruto said in exasperation.
Sasuke reflected back to the day he was talking about before it finally dawned on him what Naruto was talking about.
'Oh… that.' Sasuke thought.
It hadn't really been a kiss, though. It barely counted as one, really. It was an unintentional kiss that had raised the wrath of all the girls in the classroom, including Sasuke. It didn't count for anything. It certainly wasn't something to apologize for...
"Why should you apologize for that?" he asked, feeling suddenly embarrassed that Naruto would bring that up when he was resting on his lap.
"I don't know..." Naruto confessed. "It just suddenly occurred to me I never said sorry for it."
"It wasn't your fault."
"Yeah, but still..."
Another pause. Sasuke shifted his legs slightly. "Why did you bring that up of all things?"
"Cause I'm drunk, I guess," Naruto mumbled. He adjusted his head closer to Sasuke's hip. "You're a very comfortable pillow, Sasuke. Anyone ever tell you that?"
"No. At least, no one comes to mind," Sasuke said, smirking at the thought of anyone else telling him that.
"Well, you are... And I didn't mind the kiss at all. Yours was a lot better then Hinata's kiss. Her's was all awkward and wet..."
"I can't believe you just told me that." Sasuke really couldn't. Should he be flattered? Disturbed? Somehow he wasn't sure what he felt. Neither didn't quiet seem to fit.
"Me too," Naruto admitted. "I'm kind of curious of what it felt like exactly..."
"It's been a long time, you see."
"You really are drunk, aren't you?"
"I'm just curious, that's all."
"Don't call me an idiot, idiot." Naruto was no longer leaning on Sasuke but glaring face to face with him.
Sasuke really couldn't understand what was going on in his brain at the moment. "Idiot," he said again only to be cut off by Naruto kissing him before he could finish the word. The kiss was clumsy at best, but Sasuke found himself responding to it anyway, surprised at just how good it felt. The logical side of him that would have protested to him allowing this seemed to have given up at the moment, and Sasuke was glad for that.
When they broke away from one another, Naruto was grinning. "Yeah. Definitely better then Hinata's..."
Sasuke rolled his eyes. "God, you're so—"
He smiled. "Not quite what I was looking for, no."
Naruto giggled. "Well, now that I know, I guess that I'll—" Naruto made a move to get up.
Sasuke caught his wrist, not quite sure what he was thinking exactly. "And just where do you think you're going?"
"To get the bottle," Naruto said, looking surprised.
"What? I don't I get a turn?" Sasuke asked boldly, surprising himself almost as much as Naruto. He wanted to laugh out loud at the expression on his rival's face when he pulled him back down. Sasuke leaned in and caught the other boys mouth with his own. Naruto made a sound of surprise in his throat that only spurred Sasuke on more. He allowed himself to finally run his hand through Naruto's hair as their lips parted and the kiss deepened. His awareness narrowed to the feel of Naruto's lips and the flush of their faces as their mouths explored one another.
Sasuke wasn't sure how long it had been when Sakura and Ino found them. Obviously trying to take him by surprise, they pushed open the door with a loud bang and leaped into the room.
"We found you, Sasuke-kun!" Sakura said joyously.
"A waitress said she saw you run in here," Ino added.
"Now let us take your picture and be done with—"
Their cameras were already flashing before they realized what they had captured on film. Caught off guard and flustered from the sake, both Sasuke and Naruto were slow in pulling away from each other.
Sakura looked sick. Ino looked in shock. Naruto and Sasuke just looked. It wasn't so surprising when the two girls turned slowly with frozen expressions, cameras still in hand, and left the building without a word, scaring a few pedestrians in the street who mistook them for ghosts as they floated away from the building with white faces.
There was a pause as Sauske and Naruto stare blankly at each other's faces. Both probably were wondering if the girls were going to come back to kill them but then decided it would be best to finish what they started while they still could blame it all on the sake. Besides, if the girls did come back to finish them off, what better way was there to go then this?
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Be sure to tell me what you thought!