Disclaimers: Not mine...yet. Mwhahahahaha.
Author's Notes: This is my first fic ever so be kind please. I'm not sure if this is going to Ryan/Marissa or Alex/Marissa. I'm a hardcore RM fan but I'll do anything for reviews. lol :)

Alex couldn't stop the tears that ran down her face. She hadn't cried since third grade, but yet again, here she was, crying, as she packed all her belongings into her bags.

She wanted to stop crying; she really did. Only weak people cried. She wasn't weak. She was strong. But she couldn't help the tears that fell.

Stop, Alex told herself. Stop. It's only Marissa. She's not worth crying over.

Oh, but yes, she was. Marissa was worth everything. Every single, fucking thing was worth it if it meant Marissa would love her.

She wanted to stop bawling like a child.

But she didn't.

She couldn't.

What the fuck made Ryan so special anyway? What did he have that she didn't? What the fuck was wrong with her, Alex? She fucking loved her more than Ryan would ever. She would fucking love her more'n anyone would ever. Including Ryan.

Marissa Cooper was broken inside. And she, Alex, could mend that broken heart. She could love Marissa. She could be Marissa's one and only.

Stop it, Alex told herself. It's over. Marissa wants Ryan.

Oh, but she couldn't help loving Marissa. She could feel her heart shattering. Why can't you love me, Marissa?

Alex stopped packing and her tears held back for a minute. She collapsed onto Marissa's bed. She clutched Marissa's pillow to her chest. She could smell Marissa's scent. Her beautiful scent. She smelt like apricots and pears. She smelt like love. She smelt like...Marissa.

Oh, why don't you love me, 'Rissa? she thought to herself, clutching the pillow as more tears tumbled down Alex's cheeks.

Alex needed Marissa. Alex needed Marissa so bad.

And then Alex sat up. Why hadn't she thought of it before? She brushed her tears harshly from her face and went to the bathroom. She washed her face and looked up at her reflection in the mirror. She could see Marissa's reflection there as well. Her arms were wrapped around Alex's waist and her face was so close to Alex's. Alex could feel her soft touch move in slow circles on her stomach. And then, Marissa disappeared. Gone.

"'Rissa?" Alex whimpered. "Don't go. No, please. Don't go!"

But she didn't come back.

Alex felt the tears rushing back. But Alex wasn't going to give up now. Alex loved Marissa and she wasn't going to let go of her that fast.

She was going to pay Ryan a little visit.

Author's Notes: I'm not sure if this is going to be an RM or AM so if you have a suggestion, tell me if you prefer Ryan or Alex with sweet little 'Rissa.