Carrots Are People Too


By Shyro Foxfeather


Beast Boy sat huddled beneath the dark folds of old jackets and the musty scent of dust from the long untouched coats and hats. He had been here for quite some time now and he feared he would never be able to leave the safe confines of the small box-like room—albeit that the room wasn't entirely safe seeing as an enemy attack could knock it to miniscule pieces, but he didn't know that so we won't tell him.

Many times his friends would occasionally open up the door and offer him a plate of food. Starfire had even attempted to get him to eat some of his favorite Udon noodles. He refused as the smiling faces of carrot people haunted his mind in an obscure collaboration of images. He also hadn't seen hide nor hair of Raven and he felt dully miserable about this.

At least he was until she swung open the door and shoved a bowl of Ramen under his nose. "Eat it." She demanded crossly and it seemed to him that someone must've bribed her quite a sum to get her to come here.

He mustered a weak glare and pushed the bowl away. "No because unless this is made of honey or water I'm not eating it."

She sat down meditation style—not that she was meditating or anything— and pushed the bowl back towards him as she raised a fine eyebrow. "You may have to explain the whole honey thing to me…"

He slid the bowl back. "Honey is made by bees and not a cute fluffy animal or plant or anything else."

"That's nice…" She replied and pushed the bowl towards him again. "Now eat."

"No." He muttered darkly.

Thus the awkward pause.

"…I lied."

A blank look crossed his face. "Huh?"

Raven shrugged and found the dusty walls of the closet quite interesting as her eyes lined the dark wood. "I typed the whole thing myself. The planet doesn't exist and the people there aren't real. You can safely eat vegetables without fear that you're a cannibal."

"Oh…" He looked a little bitter. "Why didn't you tell me this three days ago?"

She rose and dusted herself off. "It was funny." She said simply and walked out of the dark room and out of sight.

"Funny?" He muttered dismally. "Stupid…girl." He paused and looked down at the enticing bowl of Ramen. "Maybe I'll just die her hair pink after I eat this."

And with that he binged on instant noodles and a mountainous amount of tofu goodness.


Disclaimer: Don't look now; the fruit bats will slay your soul with their rolls of duct tape of doom! Beware the elongated ostrich! Despite what release forms the albino cat demons may have sent to by mail of carries pigeon, I do not own Teen Titans, which means we will be busy trying not to be the meal of the flying purple alligators or any sort of unpleasant bird of poetry.

I think I can update now… maybe.

Everyone who's slightly mad and wants me to update say aye!


My Newest Quote: Our hunk a junk car sounds like a boat that kept going when it got to shore and had its anchor down. The people on board are all screaming 'Land ho, already! You can stop now!' and the driver's just shaking his head and going 'I've seen land hoes, they're not that great, and we ain't stoppin' for any of 'em!' –Me

Sadly, our breaks are going out. XD