Hey again! Sorry it took so long for me to get this chapter out…I've been in a remote part of Denmark for the past 3 weeks with no laptop or computer access other than public libraries…but I'm back now! Thank you all for the great reviews and support! They make me all warm and fuzzy inside! It was so cool to find out that this story had made it into a C2 group. I never expected THAT to happen :D Here are some responses for those who reviewed:
Fluffys4evr: There are more chapters; but it's the typing them out that takes me a while…I'm a crappy typist. Thanks for reading!
Sesshomaru vs. Inuyasha: Is that how you spell Sesshy's name? There appear to be many variations on it. Oh, whatev, I'm over-obsessing. I'm so glad you like my story! I love it that I'm making people laugh!
Japanimeniac: omg, I LURVE your name!
Maddie: Thank you, thank you, thank you! Hehehehe, I'm glad you liked the fuzzy bunnies. And did your brother ever recover from the pixystick attack?
Brekke rider of gold Wirenth: Don't worry, Jaken got them into water in time.
Bazooie: Hey, it's alright. I got a 91 on the English exam. Woohoo! I'm actually listening to Dragostea Din Tei right now…mwahaha…and I have NO idea if foxes are colorblind. I think all animals are except for some birds. I heard that on a nature show. But it didn't say anything about foxes…hmm…And will you still pick up a hot guy for me? Because I tried my best to get this updated on time! And don't worry, Sesshy will return!
I Know Where You Sleep: Cool, I'm amazing? Cooly cool cool! Except I might not be as amazing as you say I am, since I totally unbalanced the washing machine a little while ago and it's half filled with water and I don't know what to do because it's growling at me and I really really don't want it to explode or something.
Stillcan'tthinkofaname: Thank you for agreeing with me on the raccoon point. There aren't many who agree with me there.
Alrighty, now if I missed anybody, please review and mention that I did and I will send a batch of telepathic cookies to you. And I DID really unbalance the washing machine and I'm hoping that ignoring it will make it better. Do any of you have any advice? HELP HELP HELP!
As a fun bonus type thing, here are some helpful Danish phrases in case you ever go to Denmark, meet someone who only speaks Danish, or just want to confuse your friends and family members.
Jeg er din kaereste (I'm his/her girl/boyfriend)
Han er den aegte vaer (He's the real thing)
Jeg arbejdder i bagelbutikken (I work at the bagel store)
Jeg spildte kaffe i bilen (I spilled coffee in your car)
Hvor pinligt(This is awkward)
Hvem er Daniel?(Who's Daniel?)
Vi spiller kroket(We're playing croquet)
Lavede Peter kyllingetarte?(Peter made a chicken pot pie?)
Han har en vis charme(He's got charm)
Der er kylling!(It's chicken!)
Skal vi danse?(Want to dance/Shall we dance?)
Tak, fordi do forstaar det(Thanks for understanding)
Jeg skal tisse(I need to pee)
Giv mig din skjorte(Give me your shirt)
Jeg laver noget the(I'll make some tea)
Det er utroligt(This is unbelievable)
Lad os pjaekke(Let's play hooky)
Det var min chef…(That was my boss…)
Hvad laver du her?(What're you doing here?)
So use them well! And if there are any native Danish speakers out there who realize that I misspelled anything, I'm apologizing in advance. I was copying them off an English movie that had Danish subtitling and the subtitles were moving fast. But enjoy them anyways!
You know what's a REALLY hard computer game? Minesweeper. There's all this counting and remembering involved. It's a lot more than my summer brain (a/n: BRIAN!) can handle. But I can't back down from a challenge so I keep getting exploded. Pokkers.
So anyhooways, let's move on to the story! I think I've done enough procrastinating for today and I am now fortified with yummy cherry limeade.
Alrighty, so when the story last left off, Miroku and Kagome were valiantly riding (a/n: on the bike, you naughty-minded readers) towards Sesshy's new castle of Hogwarts, Sesshy was passed out on the stairs in drag, and the house elves haven't said whether or not Jaken was alive or not. They still won't acknowledge his presence. Myrtle and Rin had killed the batteries on the iPod by listening to 'Dragostea Din Tei' on repeat. And then, of course, Inuyasha was still asleep and being "guarded" by the still-deaf Sango and the scarred Shippo.
Dawn broke on the clearing slowly. Birds began chirping, trees rustled, and Inuyasha flopped over in his blankets lazily. Blinking his eyes, he realized that he felt better than he had in years. He stretched leisurely and yawned. Sitting up, he yawned again and looked around his campsite. Shippo was still asleep in his blankets, and Sango was humming in her sleep. Inuyasha got up and kicked Shippo in the ribs.
"Wake up, brat. Where're Kagome and Miroku?" he asked, huskily. 'Weird. I must've been sick or something…the voice is all screwy…' he thought.
"Aaaagh! Oh, you're awake!" Shippo yelped, "but what's wrong with your voice? And you have a fluffy tail. And you've got…ohmygod! Those ARE whiskers!"
"What? You're seeing things, brat. I don't have whiskers," Inuyasha scoffed.
"Uh, whatever you say, Inuyasha," Shippo said, jumping up and tweaking Inuyasha's new whiskers.
"OW!" Inuyasha yelled, "What the hell are these? Brat, what happened to me?". He picked up Shippo and shook him upside down while Shippo screeched "I dunno I dunno I dunno! You were asleep and stuff and now you're awake but you have whiskers and a fluffy tail!"
"Tail?" Inuyasha said, dropping Shippo and twisting around. Sure enough, a fluffy white tail was twitching around behind him. "TAIL?" he grabbed at his tail, but it evaded his grasp the more he chased it. Finally, Shippo reached out and snagged it.
"Ooh! It's all soft and pretty!" Shippo said, cuddling it to his face.
"Let go, you little…ooh, that feels nice!" Inuyasha purred. After a couple of seconds, Inuyasha realized the awkwardness of the situation and yanked his tail out of Shippo's hands and held it protectively against his chest. "Don't touch my tail!" he said, pounding Shippo on the head.
"Gah! Ow ow ow!" Shippo yelled, covering his head and running over the the relative safety of Sango's blankets. Sango merely flipped him over and kept humming in her sleep. "Inuyasha, you PURRED!"
"I did NOT! Now, what's for breakfast?" Inuyasha said, avoiding his new problems and rummaging for breakfast. 3 bowls of ramen later, he was ready to face the world. And his tail.
"Now, Shippo, what's wrong with Sango? She's awake now, but she's dancing and won't respond and it looks like her left leg is cramping up," Inuyasha said. Sango had leaped across the clearing several times by now, and her left leg was definitely curling up onto itself, which looked rather painful.
"Don't you remember, Inuyasha? She got blasted with that horrible song and now she's deaf. We also think she might be mute, but that's only because she hasn't talked to anyone in days except to yell at Miroku. Although, that might be just a reflex," Shippo mused, still on the opposite side of the fire from Inuyasha.
"Ooookay…no, I don't remember that…and where are Kagome and Miroku?" Inuyasha asked concernedly.
"Um, they went off to Sesshy's castle to get Kagome's magic music box back before it gets broken. Miroku was also whispering something into Kagome's ear at the time and her face turned red, but I couldn't hear it. But they let me stay here and be in charge of the camp, because I'm a strong man!" Shippo puffed out his little chest. Inuyasha was unimpressed and threw a rock at Shippo, who ducked, letting the rock hit Sango, who yelped, then threw the rock back at Inuyasha, who got confused and was consequently hit by the rock.
"Okay, we're going after all of them after I finish with one last question. Which one of you painted my nails and braided my hair while I was sleeping?" Inuyasha asked menacingly.
"Uh, that was Miroku," Shippo replied shiftily. Luckily for him, Inuyasha didn't catch on and started licking the ramen off his hands. "Uh, Inuyasha?" Shippo asked. "Eh?" Inuyasha paused mid-lick, then glared at Shippo. "You didn't see ANYthing, brat!"
Soon after, Inuyasha had packed up the camp with Shippo, they had collected Sango and more or less told her what they were going to do ("I am NOT a whore!" whack), and set off to rescue Kagome from Sesshy and Miroku.
Meanwhile, back in the forest, Rin and Myrtle were staring at the iPod in befuddlement (a/n: isn't that a cool word? Be-fudd-le-ment!). "What do you mean, it just died?" Myrtle asked, "It can't just DIE like that!"
"Yeah, well it did! I didn't do anything to it; it just stopped making that song!" Rin exclaimed, shaking the iPod in an attempt to revive it.
"Wait, what's that noise? That noise like a train?" Myrtle asked, suddenly listening for the train noise.
"What's a train?" Rin asked, looking around the woods nervously for this 'train' creature that was making the scary choo-choo noise. Suddenly a bright red bubble was seen floating down out of the sky. The bubble drifted its way down to the forest floor, until it was popped by a tree branch and Santa fell twenty feet to the ground.
"Goddamn bubbles. I wish we hadn't eaten the fing reindeer. They smelled, but got you somewhere a lot faster without looking like a goddamn pansy," Santa muttered angrily, brushing off his coat and boots.
"Ohmygod, Santa CUSSED!" Myrtle exclaimed.
"Yeah, and not for the first time neither," Santa belched. "Now, yo ho ho, what's yer prollem?"
Rin looked to Myrtle for assistance. Myrtle merely shrugged, saying "Back in the future, they say he's a jolly old elf. I guess you can't have a children's story about a mean old drunk."
"Thaz right, you can't!" Santa grinned, then stumbled in place. "Now, whaz yer prollem, pretty girls?" Rin shrugged at Myrtle, then said "This magic music box thing won't make music anymore, Mr. Santa. What should we do?"
"Look, I really dunno, pretty girl. I don't do much. We let the slaves…ah mean the 'elves'…do the work around where I'm from. See, ah could take yer iPod back with me, but there's no real guarantee that I'd remember to get it fixed, or even that you'd see it agin," Santa said.
"Oh. Ooookay…" Rin said, glancing at Myrtle with a 'you-can-come-help-me-with-this-loud-drunk-anytime' look. "OH! Right, now, Santa, I think I hear some magical reindeer off in that glade over there," Myrtle said, pointing off to the left.
"Mmmm…ye don't say, pretty ladies," Santa said, waddling off as quick as his reindeer-leather boots would carry his large mass into the woods. As soon as he was gone, Rin and Myrtle darted off in the opposite direction.
"Oh, god, they'll come to LOVE that disgusting old man in the future?" Rin gasped as she dodged trees. "Yeah, his story was created ages ago, but it didn't got spread on until the 1940s by this company named 'Coca-cola' as a trick to get people to buy their drinks and it caught on from there until the whole world believes in this jolly old man who gives presents at Christmas," Myrtle replied. (a/n: it's true!)
"Sad…" Rin said. "Now we really need to find Kagome before he comes back…"