TaraYuki-Uesugi here with yet another fic. And yes, it's another fic with children but this fic dosen't circle around any children, this is all YukixShu. I must say that this is a colaboration with my friend Delia, who totally rocks because she came up with the idea and asked me to write it:blushes: . Thanks Delia! I Love You, MWA. Well, we hope you enjoy because we do! Enjoy!
Disclaimer: Ok look, Do I look like Maki Murakami! I don't think so!
And now...on with the show...
My rock, my strength, my concience, my back-bone. My light, my sun, my world, my everything. That's what he is to me, my everything. Without him I'd be lost. There would be no point in me living. No point in me waking to face another day. I wouldn't know how. He has worked his way into my world, my universe, and I can't see my life without him. I can't lose him, I just can't.
Tears. I've shed alot of tears since I've met him, and thats saying something coming from me. I've never loved anyone so much in my entire life. It hurts. It hurts so bad. I'm just so tired of it. I'm sick of it all. Why? Why does life have to be so difficult, like we haven't been through enough? I stay by his side day after day. I have never cheated on him and never has the thought crossed my mind. He is the only one that owns my heart, but why can't it be the same for me? Why can't I be the only one he sees? Why can't he tell me he loves sometimes? I'm not asking him to say it everyday, just sometimes, just once I'd like to hear those words leave his mouth. "I love you Shuichi" How hard is it? Why can't he just say it?
We were actually making progress. We've been through so much together but we were progressing. He would smile more and laugh and just did little things to show me he cared. But now, now it's like we're starting all over again. We're back to where he locks himself in that damn room for hours on end . We're back to him barely even acknowledging my presence in the house again. Back to him not smiling, not laughing and barely even speaking. Maybe he doesn't love me anymore. He told me once that he loved me and needed me and that he didn't want me to put anyone above him. Maybe now he doesn't feel that way.
I've noticed the change in him. The distance, the silence, that woman. Yes, that woman. I don't know who she is and I'm too afraid to ask. Why? I don't know. Maybe I'm afraid he'll get angry. Maybe I'm afriad of the answer. I don't know. She's beautiful, how can I compete? She's a woman. A woman. She can bear children for him, give him a family. Something I can't. I'm a guy. A guy. But I love him. I can't lose him.
I've been losing alot of weight lately. Atleast that's what everyone tells me. Not that I'm surprised, I barely eat. I can't help it, once I get home I don't have much of an appetite. Most of the time I just go to bed. I don't have the energy most nights to go and try to talk to him or pry him away from that computer screen. I just wish he'd talk to me. I know we can get through anything if he'd just talk to me. I love him more than anything in the world and if there's a problem, I will help him, no matter what. I'd die for him if I had to. I love him.
I can't have him leave me. I'd be completely lost without him. He is my whole world. I'd die without him. That's why I have to do this. That's why I have to go through with this. It will be better for both of us in the end. I know it will be. We just need something that will bring us back together. Something that will be a part of both of us and that we'll love, cherish and care for together. Something that he thinks only a woman can give him. Maybe then he'll see I can to.
Yup, this is the place. I hold a flyer in my hand as I stand outside a red brick building. I look up at the sign that reads "Private Practices" as the rain beats down on me, shielding my tears from view, not that anyone can see them. No one knows I'm here and who could I tell, really? They'd all think I'm crazy. No, no one must know. Not yet. They'd try to tell me it wouldn't work but I know it will. There's nothing else I can do. This is my last resot and there's no way I'm backing down now.
I love him and I will do anything to keep him by my side. Anything.
End of Chapter 1
Well that's chapter one. What do you think? The next will be Yuki's POV but for the most part, the fic is narrational. Please Review and tell us what you think. Chapter 2 should be up real soon. Thanks for reading!
Until next time...