I was going to write a different fic, but I decided that my first fic needed to be done justice first. So, without further ado … I present to you the rewrite of "A Historically Inaccurate Story." It won't be exactly the same, and I'm not in the mood to write a sequel or anything fancy … but you'll survive.

Sidenotes: The plot will be totally different from the original, so those of you who think you know what's coming next – you don't (sideways, I've changed the ending as well). I will not post up the ending to the original. I have changed many aspects of the original, because I think the original was lame and stupid. I won't give them their best weapons at first; they will EARN them (few exceptions to some veterans who already have). Also, I will use "the Han" instead of "China." China is a name that we Westerners gave to them. I assume that they called themselves the Han at that time period. I will use mostly the game and some of the novel, and maybe some history when needed … so I apologize in advance for butchering any ages and historic events. Please refer to the title, as always.

Rating: The T is for safety and freedom of speech. It is also for violence and (later) character death.

Warning: Xiao Qiao is not very IC. If you hate anything OOC, then I suggest you not read it (hey, at least I'm warning you). Also, I am terrible at romance. In addition, the fic's not completely Cleantongue, but you will not find any really bad words anywhere in this fic. If you want to flame, go ahead, but don't expect to be paid any attention. Constructive criticism or historical tidbits accepted. And also, the fighting is more descriptive here … sorry … in my earlier fic it was short because it's so easy to kill in the game … but I've been watching more and more historical dramas, and I don't think it's that easy to kill another person. The main pairing is, unsurprisingly, Zhou Yu x Xiao Qiao.

Summary: Love at first sight? Not. How one relationship in particular develops over a long course of battles, conquering evil, annoying each other to death, the like. (ZYxXQ, SCxDQ, GNxSSXxLB)

Style names in this chapter: GONGJIN .Zhou Yu

Disclaimer: Don't own DW, Koei, or the characters.



Chapter One: Damsels in Distress


Sun Ce let his horse, a white mount, skid to a stop as soon as the enemy camp could be seen in the distance, partially concealed by a thick fog. He then swiveled his horse around to face the friend galloping along behind him. "Zhou Yu!"

Zhou Yu also screeched to a halt, though he was still quite a distance behind Sun Ce. "Yes?"

"How can we pull this off?"

Zhou Yu almost smiled. Typical Sun Ce. Save the actual thinking as a last-minute resort. He had known that something of the sort was going to happen as soon as the issue of the Qiaos had been brought up.

"Nothing better than rescuing the damsels in distress," Sun Ce had said with one of his trademark grins.

Zhou Yu shook his head to rid his mind of distractions and thought long and hard about what would be the best tactic.

"Well, the worst-case scenario would be to open the tent flap and find that the Qiaos aren't there. Nothing too dangerous can impede our mission, can it?" Zhou Yu pointed out.

"So what are we waiting for?" asked Sun Ce, dismounting from his horse. "Let's dash out there and go!"

"Wait, Ce! It won't be that simp--"

Too late. Sun Ce was long out of earshot.

x . x . x . x

"HELP!" shrieked Xiao Qiao at the top of her lungs as soon as the guard turned his back on the two Qiao sisters, who were chained together at the wrists and at the ankles. Instantly the man swerved around and gave her a good smack across the face with the end of his spear.

"JUST. SHUT. UP!" he roared.

"Then let us go, you fat, stick-wielding PERVERT!" shot back Xiao Qiao.

"You're crazy!" shouted the guard, threatening to hit her again.

"Well, then I refuse to remain silent!" With that, Xiao Qiao attempted to hit him, but the heavy chains weighed down her attack. Not even a bee would have flinched under such an blow.

Again, she was thwacked for her efforts.

"Foolish girl ... " sneered the guard.

Then, suddenly, there was a sickening crack as a wooden blur made contact with the guard's head.

"Take that!" cried a strange voice.

With that, the guard fell to the ground, either unconscious or dead, to reveal the figure standing behind him. He was a strong man, muscular, clad mostly in red with a goatee and light brown hair tied into a high ponytail with red ribbons. He wielded a pair of tonfas, one of those long, stick-ish weapons that had attacked the guard, and he had a good-natured quality about him … and yet, he seemed strangely noble.

"Sun Ce! Behind you!" cried a voice from outside the tent.

Instantly, the strange man, apparently named Sun Ce, spun around to find five soldiers behind him, lined up neatly with their spears held at ready. Sun Ce took a few steps backward. The soldiers took this as their cue to attack.

"Intruder!" they cried, lunging forward.

Sun Ce tightened his grip on his tonfas, bringing them up in a defensive position.

Behind the soldiers, a sword sliced through the tent flap, cutting it clean off. The men who had been so focused on attacking Sun Ce turned around to face the sudden sound, still holding their weapons a ready-to-attack position, the spearheads all pointing to the door..

"Two-to-five," said the man who had just cut the tent open, flipping his dark, slightly-longer-than-shoulder-length hair casually away from his shoulder. "Better than our last odds, I'd say."

"This is almost too easy, Gongjin," answered Sun Ce, grinning off-handedly.

"Kill them!" cried one soldier.

"Yes! Kill them!" answered another. Instantly, the rest echoed, "Kill them!" in unison.

Da Qiao squealed and scooted back, away from the fighting, prompting Xiao Qiao to roll her eyes and mutter, "Chicken."

Xiao Qiao herself was fascinated, seeing her first battle so up-close. She watched as a soldier charged the stranger called Gongjin, who simply brought up his steel sword to lift the attacker's spear out of the way before harshly bringing it around and back down again, pushing harshly, catching the soldier off balance. Then he lunged forth, burying his blade deep inside the man's stomach. The man lurched, and Gongjin let his blade sit there for a moment before pulling it out. With no further ado, the man crumpled to the floor.

Then she watched as two soldiers leaped in the air with their spears lifted above their heads, about to land by Sun Ce and bring their blades crashing down with them.

Unfortunately for them, Sun Ce foresaw this move and leaped into the air above them, backflipping. As soon as he had completed one rotation through the air, he abruptly brought out his tonfas and gave each soldier's head a good whack at the same time, knocking them to the floor with two painful thumps. If they weren't dead, they were at least brain-dead from the force of the blow. Then he gracefully landed on his own two feet, in a guarded position. Seeing Gongjin's kill, he winked and gave his ally a thumbs-up. "Three down, two to go."

A soldier leaped behind Sun Ce, but Gongjin cried out, "Watch it!" Sun Ce immediately caught the hint and turned around to face the enemy at the same time that a soldier snuck up behind Gongjin and roared a battle cry. Gongjin, caught off guard, managed to sidestep a bit, but not before the spear had bitten his side. Wincing slightly, Gonjin whipped around and sliced straight across. This swift blow was only parried by pure luck as the guard brought his spear around to protect his face instinctively.

"Nice job," called Sun Ce from where he was, observing Gongjin's work. The soldier that had attempted to take on Sun Ce was lying on the ground, completely lifeless.

"Whatever," replied Gongjin, wincing again. He looked rather tired; odd, for such a slight loss of blood, and he staggered to one knee in sheer exhaustion. The soldier sensed the kill and triumphantly closed in with a lazily-aimed blow.

The tiredness evaporated from Gongjin's eyes as he rolled forwards, just barely under the threatening silver arc of the blade, and with a clever maneuver, he knocked the soldier's spear from his hands. The newly-unarmed soldier watched in amazement as Gongjin jumped back to his feet and pinned him to the wall, that steel sword's sinister coolness resting but a hair's width from his delicate neck. He gulped, eyes darting about.

"Surrender or death?" asked Gongin, tilting his head to the side in a cold manner.

"Whaa … ?" The soldier was still confused. "But you were--"

"Idiot. You should have known I was acting. You're lucky if that scratch leaves even a scar. Now to the matter at hand. Surrender or death?"

The guard's features tightened proudly. "Death."

"So be it." With that, the bloodstained silver blade pushed down and quickly ended the man's life.

With that, Gongjin turned to the Qiaos, perfectly gracious and not at all rustled by the fact that he had just beheaded another man. "Good afternoon, ladies. My name is Zhou Yu, and this is Sun Ce."

Xiao Qiao never recalled fainting, but later she was told by Da Qiao that that is exactly what she did.

x . x . x . x

"That was disgusting, Yu," Sun Ce gagged.

"Put it this way," replied Zhou Yu. "If it hadn't been him, it would've been me. And anyway, it's not as if I'm not sickened by all the killing, too."

"You just don't show it." Sun Ce rolled his eyes. "But you could've been less violent with the last man … "

"Ce, he was trying to kill me," Zhou Yu pointed out.

"That's besides the point!" exclaimed Sun Ce.

Zhou Yu crossed his arms. "Must we continue to bicker? Or shall we free the Qiao sisters?"

Sun Ce nodded. "You're right." Then he leaned in towards the only conscious girl sitting there, with coal-black hair and fear-filled eyes. "What's your name?" he asked kindly.

The girl blushed nervously and backed away, scooting into the tent wall.

"We're not going to hurt you," added Sun Ce. "We're friends. Here to set you free. So, what's your name?"

She met Sun Ce's eyes shyly. "I-I don't quite remember."

Sun Ce was incredulous. "What?"

The Qiao blushed harder. "We haven't been called anything but Elder Qiao and Younger Qiao for as long as I can remember … we once had other names, but no more. Thus, I have been called Da Qiao (Big Qiao) and my younger sister here has been called Xiao Qiao (Small Qiao)."

Zhou Yu found his glance shifting briefly to the younger Qiao, whose cheeks were marred with striped bruises. His eyes flickered with what could have been compassion before his eyes darted back to the elder Qiao.

"But that's humiliating! To be called 'Big' and 'Small' for the rest of your lives!" Sun Ce was reddening, as he often did when he was arguing for something he was passionate about.

"Never mind," said Zhou Yu, interrupting before Sun Ce could get really heated up. "Is your sister ill?"

"What?" asked Da Qiao, blushing again. "I'm sorry, no, I don't think so."

"Then why has she fainted?"

"I don't think she's ever seen so much blood up close," answered Da Qiao shakily.

Zhou Yu eyed her oddly. "And you have?"

Again, Da Qiao took to blushing. "I'm used to bloodshed. I shielded Xiao's eyes from it when we were younger, and since then there's been nothing much except for Dong Zhuo, and even he disappeared a while ago. B-but she's never … actually … "

Zhou Yu pressed his lips together. Those who knew him well, like Sun Ce, knew that this was a sign of one of three things. He could either be suppressing laughter, be expressing distaste, or be at a loss for words. In this case, it was the third option.

"Dong Zhuo receded because he was killed," he informed them.

"What?" Da Qiao blushed again, realizing how impudent she had sounded. "I mean, he's dead? We're free?"

"Not quite," said Zhou Yu, spinning around and slicing downwards neatly to swiftly eliminate yet another soldier that had been running up behind him. Da Qiao stared nervously at his bloodstained sword. "That should be the last of them. I don't detect anymore footsteps; do you, Ce?"

"How did you know that the soldier was … ?" asked Da Qiao, curious.

Zhou Yu shrugged. "That is not important. What we must do now is get you two back to our home."

"You can take the younger sister," said Sun Ce, delegating responsibility as always. "She's unconscious. Can't you use your magic to heal her?"

Zhou Yu gritted his teeth together. "For the last time. It is not magic. It is energy that we draw from our surroundings to--"

"Forget the lecture," laughed Sun Ce. "We'll be late! What shall Father think?"

"Nothing appropriate for children's ears, that's for sure," agreed Zhou Yu, also laughing. He turned to Da Qiao. "Do you agree with these arrangements?"

Da Qiao nodded. "I-I do not mind."

"Then let us get going!" cried Sun Ce, grabbing Da Qiao's arm and running forth. Squealing in surprise, Da Qiao struggled to keep up with Sun Ce's strenuous pace.

"Hurry up, Yu!" Sun Ce exclaimed once he had reached his horse, not noticing how hard Da Qiao was puffing to catch her breath.

"You are murdering the Lady Qiao," Zhou Yu called in reply, walking out of the tent with the unconscious Xiao Qiao in his arms. "They are dignified ladies, unused to such exercise."

"It is fine," whispered Da Qiao.

Sun Ce grinned broadly. "For that, I am glad."


End of Damsels in Distress


A/N: Wow, this was short … not even two thousand words! I promise the next chapter will be longer! Anyway, read and review! Tell me what you think and stuff (Gosh, I can NEVER be serious). This is rather awkward, so I guess I'll be making my stately departure about now.