The Pros and Cons of Ascension

By Kate O'Riley

Disclaimer: "Stargate" is not mine. This is just a fic where I'm adding in a few thoughts to the episode

Season: 6

Episode: "Abyss"

Codes: S/J

Spoilers: Major, major, major (Carter! J/K) "Abyss" spoilers. Which, in a way, makes it a "Frozen" spoiler too. So, unless you've seen early sixth season, you don't want to read, but you're welcome to cut and paste this onto your computer and save it until such a point that you do see it, and then you want to read it.

A/N: One of two fics I was inspired to write from "Abyss". Spoilers for that ep, don't read unless seen! The other fic is "Something I Had To Do" Takes place during "Abyss"

So. To ascend, or not to ascend?

That is the question.

Never was one for Shakespeare.

All right. So, Danny-boy's wanting me to ascend. Well, I've got some ideas of my own about that. It's kind of hard to keep my mind straight. Probably a side effect of dying a couple times. I have to say, after being killed slowly and painfully a couple times, some things begin to look good.

So…here's my list…the pros and cons of ascension.

The pros…let's see…

1. No more dying.

2. I can kick Baal's wimpy little ass to the next millennium.

3. While I'm at it, I can wreck havoc on the snakeheads as a whole.

4. I can be smarter than Carter for once.

5. I can really stun bocce ball boy when I disappear in a bright flash of light.

The cons…

1. I'd have to die at least once more, slowly and painfully.

2. According to Daniel, I wouldn't be allowed to interfere.

3. Also according to Daniel, if I tried, the others (whoever they are) will try to stop me.

4. White's not really my color.

5. I'd probably end up worrying about universal affairs, when it's hard enough trying to decide if I should have Fruit Loops or Lucky Charms for breakfast.

6. No more fishing.

7. No Carter.

8. No Teal'c or Jonas for that matter either.

9. No more paperwork! (oh, right, that's a pro)

Yeah…well, obviously, the cons outweigh the pros…I think. But if I'm entirely honest with myself, #7 really would weigh heavy. I'd miss her. I'd miss her smile, and the way she gets excited over really technical stuff, and the way she patiently explains things to me. I wouldn't understand half of what I knew if I ascended. That's Sam's department.

So…guess that's a no to the ascension, then.

Time to see what will be behind Death #3…

The End

(well, not really, but you'd have to watch the episode for that…and I suggest reading "Something I Had To Do")

Reviews appreciated. But I'll warn you, flames are used to power enemy Jaffa staff weapons and will be promptly recycled into big-time character whumpin', so if YOU want to be responsible for your favorite character getting hurt, and possibly slightly emotionally scarred…