This is a one shot based on my poem A Soul Worn Thin. It's from Raven's point of view in her diary at first then blah and is just a quick little thing.
Blaze- I usually don't like it when she commits suicide too but I made an exception with that but the story mite be different
Had to clear that up. Anyway, so ya. You might want to read the poem but its not necessary I just want ppl to read it hehe.
Disclaimer: don't own em, never will, SHUT UP!
This story is dedicated to evilsangle.
I might make one more chapter for this if people want that clarifies if she did commit suicide or not and that sort of stuff. If the reviews tell me. I give you three days after this is posted to decide mwahahaha! On with the story!
Raven walked into her room, eyes weary and soul worn. The battle against Dr. Light had drained her of her power; he had been much stronger than before. The healing of the team though had really exhausted her. Starfire's bruises, Beast Boy's broken arm, Cyborg's cuts, and Robin's head. She had almost lost it again against him, Robin was sure to be by later to ask her about it. Raven flopped down on her bed and took her diary out from under her pillow.
'Everyday it grows harder to keep up this stony façade. Trigon is growing stronger, and my rage is close to breaking out. Damn this battle inside of my mind, damn Trigon, and curse the day I was born, Azar! Today in our battle against Dr. Light, I nearly lost it. He made me angrier than before, insulting me and calling me names I shall not repeat. This anger is sure to be the end of me, and of the others. I'm so tired inside. It's not a physical tired, but an emotional tired. It's like I'm too tired to go on in life, too weary.' She wrote. 'I'm beyond depression, now it's just a giant sinkhole I keep sinking into. My hold on reality is slipping…' Raven put her pen down and sighed, long and despairingly. She thought about the past, and how she had always managed to keep her depression at a tolerable level. Robin.
That one guy who's smile and face had sent butterflies to her stomach and who understood her. He could always tell if something was wrong just by looking into her eyes. He was her best friend, and yet he knew nothing about her despair. Sure, he could see something was wrong. But he was not one to pry. That's what made him such a good friend.
She had been okay for a time. It was Christmas Eve and they had been caught under the mistletoe. He had kissed her, and that kiss had lasted longer for her than any smile. But the effect was wearing off, and her shield was fading. He had once said something to her after that Christmas Eve. They had been on the roof, just talking, as they usually did. He had prolonged her shield, strengthened the effects of the kiss.
New Years Eve
It was cold outside, and the night clear. Raven sat on the snow covered roof alone. The footsteps of someone interrupted her thinking.
"Hey, Rae. Can I join you?" Robin had asked.
"Sure Robin." He had sat down, and they talked. During one of their long pauses, never awkward, just silent, he brought up a subject so close to her depression that it was almost uncomfortable.
"I've really noticed a change lately, Raven. You seem, I dunno, happier. More at ease with the world around you. What's going on?" He had asked her.
"Don't know. How have you noticed a change?" She asked suspiciously.
"Eyes can be the portal to one's soul. Yours used to always be a little dimmer, a little more distraught then now. Now they shine bright and are clear, almost happy." He had said softly. She nodded in understanding. They sat in silence again, before a brisk wind blew through and chilled her to the bone. Raven had shivered under her cloak. And Robin took notice. "Cold night. We should head inside soon." He had told her gently. But Raven just shook her head and wrapped her cloak tighter around her.
"I like it out here." She had stated. Robin had shrugged and scooted over towards her. She eyed him suspiciously. Robin wrapped his arms around her, sharing his warmth with her. She melted into his warm embrace. They stayed like that for the rest of their time out there before going back in.
Back to Present
That act of Robin's had strengthened the shield of the kiss. But the protection it had given her was waning.
Then when Slade had come for her, Robin had been there. Everyone else was frozen in time, only Robin was there. When she had been falling to a probable death, Robin caught her. He had always been there to offer a hand, and pull her back out of her pit of depression. But now, she had fallen beyond his reach. She couldn't stretch enough to grasp his hand. All those times he had stopped her from committing suicide, and he never knew.
She needed him the most now. But she could have no help without pulling them into her problems. Raven wasn't one to drag other people down, which was why she never told Robin about her depression and strengthening rage. She had tried to fight Trigon, but each time he had shown her visions of Robin dying, and she had lost it. Every time she had been able to escape from Nevermore, but that luck was sure to run out soon.
'I need to end this before Rage obtains total control. I am too dangerous here.' Raven thought sadly. Raven had always thought that suicide was a selfish act, hurting others to put yourself out of pain. But this was different. Her existence already endangered the lives of millions everyday, but that was when she could control her emotions better. She had had hope of a future, a future with one person she loved. Because if she loved and was truly loved back, she didn't have to contain rage herself. There would be another emotion, stronger than the rest. But that hope was crushed when she had seen Starfire kissing Robin a few days ago. Now, there was no reason to try and live. It was too dangerous.
Raven pulled out her dagger. It was old, but the blade was still sharp. Raven wrote a quick note to her friends and left it on her desk.
I am sorry I had to do this. But it is for the good of everyone.
My emotions have gotten out of control, and all of you are in grave danger.
I would rather die than be responsible for the deaths of the ones I love.
Robin, check our special spot for something that I need to tell you.
Raven grabbed another piece of paper for another note.
I love you more than you will ever know.
You are my best friend, and you kept me going.
I would be long dead if it weren't for your friendship.
Be there for the others.
I love you.
She hid this note under the floorboards of her bed, a place she and Robin only knew of. And with all her preparations done, Raven grasped the ebony handle. She could hear her broken soul straining to break free, and her heart started to beat faster.
'It won't be beating for long…' Raven thought to herself sadly. 'I am so sorry Robin. Sorry that you couldn't last.' The dagger positioned, Raven thought her final goodbyes.
The bond between the birds was strong, and Raven had unintentionally sent her message to Robin. He had heard. Heart and mind fearing the worst, he rushed to her room, hoping he was not too late.
If you want her to die, leave a review saying so. All those for her to live, tell me by a review!