Ok, this is a one-shot, and I was inspired by the ending of my other fic, Reflections of a Broken Mind. I hope you like it!
Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon, but I do own some of Chibiusa's friends.
I saw Usagi-chan today. She was out walking with Rei-chan, and they were smiling. Not like me. I don't smile when I'm alone.
I hug Luna-P closer to my body, and feel the soft velvet of her ears against my skin. I can't stay in this tree for long; the branches are scratching my skin. I jump down, and Luna-P becomes an umbrella to help me float.
Luna-P. She's like a best friend to me. I remember when I got her, for my two hundredth birthday. Mommy and Ami-chan worked hard on it, and Puu even gave Luna-P some of her special gifts.
I don't want to turn around. I don't want to see her face. But I do anyway, and there is a fake smile on my face.
"Hi there, Usagi-chan and Rei-chan! How are you?"
Rei-chan looks uneasy. I know she can see I'm faking, but I don't linger on her eyes for long.
"Daijobu. And you, Chibiusa?" Why is she looking at me like that? I smile up at her blue eyes, but I center in on her forehead.
"Daijobu." I have to get her away…and here's my chance, walking back to me. "Mamo-chan and I just came to get some ice cream." Her face crumples, and I see Rei glare at me.
"Have…fun." Her voice is faint, and Rei pulls her away.
"Was that Usako?" Mamorou-san walks up to me and hands me a chocolate cone. I nod.
"Hai. She was just talking to me." He turns around and begins to walk down the park path. I stare at Usagi's retreating back for a little bit longer. "Gomen."
Then I run, and I grab Mamorou-san's hand in my own. I can feel her eyes boring a hole into my back. Never mind. She doesn't understand now, but later…
I am sitting on the floor of my attic room, and I'm looking into Luna-P's eyes.
"I wish I could tell her he still calls her Usako, even when she's not around." It is time for my daily confessions. These are the only ways I can keep the secrets. "I wish I could tell her he still loves her. I wish I could tell her…she's my mommy."
Oh yes. I know. I'm not stupid; I am almost three hundred years old after all! Usagi is my mama, and Mamorou is my papa. But they can't know. Because Puu says they can't.
Puu is another friend of mine. She told me a secret I'm not supposed to tell anyone, not even Luna-P. So I'm gonna hold it in. I'm not gonna tell anyone.
"Chibiusa, you little spore, did you take my stuffed animals again?"
I know Shingo took them. I know he hid them in the washing machine, and I know he's out at baseball practice right now. I don't say anything, and I hear her footsteps coming. I steel myself.
"Alright, hand them over!"
"Usagi no baka!" The words sting my mouth even as I say them. "Why would I want your raggedy old bunnies?"
She pouts, and I see a wrinkle appear in her forehead. "Little Spore, give them back!"
"Iie, baka, I don't want you to have them!" I am not lying; I never said I took them.
'Chibiusa, you little twerp, give them back!"
"Go away!" I run forward and push her, and slam the door in her face. She pounds on it for a few moments, then gives up and leaves. I hold onto Luna-P and will the tears away.
It's raining. Usagi hates rainstorms, and she's staying inside. I hate them too. I don't want to be here.
Ikuko-mama and Kenji-papa took Shingo to his baseball game, but it rained so hard they had to stay at a friends. Usagi and I are alone, for tonight. Luna is at Minako's.
I whimper into the cushions on the couch when lightning strikes. It's dark, and only at six.
"Chibiusa-chan?" She stands over me, and I gulp. Did she hear me whimper?
"I just wanted to say…Gomen for yesterday. I found out Shingo did it."
I nod, and bury myself more into the coverlet on the couch. She stands there, unsure of what to do. I don't want to be alone tonight…not tonight. If I act like I want to act for a while, just until the storm is over, it won't make a big difference.
"Usagi-chan?" I say the name I call her only in my head. She looks over in surprise. "Usagi-chan, how high is the water?"
She shrugs. "I don't know. Let's go see!" I like the way she says let's. Both of us, it means. She and I tiptoe to the other side of the living room, and peer outside. Neither of us says a word. The water is rising, and fast. In a few minutes, it will probably be spilling under the door.
"I'm afraid, Usagi-chan." She puts an arm around my shoulders, and I smile happily.
"It'll be ok, Chibiusa-chan. I'm sure it will be." There is a crack of lightning, and the lights go out. I scream.
A few moments later, I realize Usagi is rocking me back and forth, whispering to me. Just like Mama does…But she is my mama, right? So it would make sense. We hear a gurgling noise, and with the dim moonlight I can see water coming in under the door.
"The stairs, Chibiusa, the stairs!" Usagi whispers in my ear. We both jump up and run upstairs. Usagi stops in her room to grab a few things, but then we go up to my attic room.
We have tried the phone; it is dead. Usagi holds up the communicator, and I realize she's not as stupid as I thought her to be.
She punches in a few numbers, and I see a fuzzy Minako appear. "Minako-chan, our house is flooding! Where are you?"
I hear her reply, although it is kind of staticky. "We're all at Rei-chan's. Ami was on her way back from the library, and Mako and me were coming from the Crown. Why weren't you there?"
Usagi shakes her head. "Chibiusa would have been by herself. I don't want to leave her alone!"
I want to hug her right then. She really does care for me. Then I realize; she has a communicator! Just like he Sailor Senshi! Could she be…? But soon, I shake the idea away. Japan has a lot of new technology. This could be a really cool walkie-talkie or something.
Then the screen goes blank. I can hear Usagi-chan's moan as she tries desperately to make it work. But there is nothing. We are alone.
She chooses to sit on my bed, and she stares out of the window. I say nothing. Silence is better than our traded insults. As if reading my mind, she turns to me.
"Do you hate me, Chibiusa?" I am almost too shocked to say anything. But I manage to squeak it out.
She doesn't look convinced. "Then why are you so mean to me? The constant harassment about my intelligence, my klutziness, and even about Mamo-chan being gone!"
I try to stop the tears from coming. It's not fair. I can't tell her…
"Why?" She's crying too. This rain is going to drive us crazy. "I'm in enough pain as it is without you making it harder! And it's ever since you came too, that he treats me like this!"
I can't help it. I taste the saltiness on my face, and shudder. "Gomen, Usagi-chan." She hears me, but she is not appeased.
"Chibiusa, that's not enough! I want to know, right now, why do you hate me?"
I can't say. Pluto says I can't say.
"I order you to answer me." I want to smile right now, and laugh loudly. An order from her overrides any of Pluto's. I sit quietly, and watch as her shaking form stills, and she turns back to the window. Then, I start to talk.
"You know I come from the future, right?" She doesn't nod, but I know she knows. She and the others were talking about me before, I heard them. "Well, you know the Sailor Senshi?" She stiffens, and a small nod greets my words.
"In the future, a thousand years from now, they and their leader, my mama, make a new place. It's called Crystal Tokyo, and everyone is at peace. The world looks better, and nicer…" I struggle to find how to explain it, and then I see Luna-P floating in front of Usagi, showing her pictures.
"My mommy and daddy rule the world, Usagi-chan. But they're in trouble, so they sent me away." I pause here, not sure of what to say.
"Is that the reason?" Her voice is quiet, and I almost don't hear it.
"Iie. As the Neo-Princess, I was expected to be a lady…I wasn't good at that. The other kids…they laughed at me. I didn't have any friends." I'm fidgeting now. "And me… my mommy had blond hair, but then it changed kinda silver. My daddy has black, almost purple hair. They both have blue eyes."
'How…?" She is looking at me carefully, in the dark, and then her eyes widen in shock. "Oh…Chibiusa…"
"They said I was not my father's daughter. They said my mommy had had an affair with someone else. They called me names…" A lump rose in my throat, and I pushed it down. "I was so miserable. Then one sailor senshi," Enter Pluto, I thought. "One sailor senshi felt sorry enough for me to show me and explain why I looked so different. But it was awful, and I saw how much pain I caused…"
"W—What do you mean?" Usagi was half crying too. I curled myself into a ball, not wanting to see anyone, especially not her.
"When I was born, I came early. My mommy was dying, and they made my daddy choose whom to save. He couldn't…he was having so much trouble. Then I came out, and my hair was a soft blond, and my eyes were sky blue. But I was dying, and they couldn't save me. My mommy—she took one look at me and said that she would do whatever it took to save me."
There was silence, except for the rain splattering against the window. Usagi prompted me, silently.
"She used her power, she gave me life. But she was giving me so much to stay alive… so all the sailor senshi joined in, giving more power to me. Because I was getting so many different auras, my hair began to change, mixing around. My eyes did the same, and at first they were brown, then they became a deep red. Then, when I started crying, the senshi all fell over. My mommy closed her eyes, and they wouldn't wake up."
"Did they…die?" Usagi ventured, scared for her friends. I shook her head.
"Iie. But they were asleep for days afterward. When they woke up, they began acted like normal, but they were much weaker then they let on to be. It was my fault…because when the enemy came, they hadn't gotten all their powers back, my mommy was trapped in a huge crystal box, and my daddy fell asleep and wouldn't wake up. He's alive…but I don't know for how long. And it's all my fault."
At this, I began to sob. I was surprised when Usagi suddenly wrapped her arms about me, and hugged me tightly. I snuggled in deeper into her arms.
"Chibiusa?" I looked up. "What about Sailor Moon? Is she in the future?" I could see the fright in her eyes, and I realized why she was so afraid.
"You're Sailor Moon…" She hesitated, and then nodded. My mama was Sailor Moon! That meant my daddy was Tuxedo Kamen! It only made sense… But could I tell her? I looked up into her eyes, shining bright with hope, and I couldn't lie to her.
"Sailor Moon isn't in the future." I heard her sharp intake of breath. "But that's because she's the leader I told you about. She becomes the ruler of the world…and my mama."
There is surprise etched across her features, and I wonder for one moment if she is going to reject me. If she is going to laugh it off and say I'm joking. Then she sweeps me in a hug.
"You're my daughter!" The jubilant cry is echoed loudly, as is our giggles. Her eyes turn serious for a split second. "Who's your father?"
I wink. "He still loves you, you know." She laughs, and we dance together. Our hearts are soaring, and we are joyful. We collapse on my bed, and she squeezes my hand.
"So you thought to distance yourself from me, so you would never be born?" she whispers. I nod. "I can't believe you'd think that way! Listen, Chibiusa, I love you. We're going to get through this, somehow."
I prop my head up on my elbow, ecstatic at those three words. "I love you too Mama." Then I frown. "But everything I told you was supposed to be secret. We can't let anyone know you know!"
A frown settles across her face as well. "I suppose we could act like we don't know. I suppose…"
"But when we're alone…we can have fun." I smile, and she does too. Then she raises her head.
"Look! The rain's stopped!" And it's true. Although the water is still high, it has. We curl up on my bed, and fall asleep.
Usagi-chan woke me up around ten. We put on our rain boots and coats, and ran outside. There were huge puddles, and the whole downstairs was soaked.
We didn't care. We were so happy! We ran in puddles, jumped in puddles, and let our boots squelch in the mud.
We clasped hands and swung in circles inside a rather large puddle, screaming with laughter. We were joyous at our secrets, and the fact that we had survived the weather.
"Wow…Kind of makes you wonder if they're sane." We stopped, frozen, and glanced to our right. The girls were all dressed in rain gear, with umbrellas held over their heads. Mamorou-san was smiling, and leaning on a black umbrella.
Usagi and I shared a secretive glance. We would have to put on a good show.
"Usagi no baka almost got us killed!"
"What? You twerp, I totally saved your life by getting you up those stairs!"
And we ended by sticking our tongues out at each other. There was a stunned silence before they laughed. Except for Rei. She smiled at us, and I shivered slightly. I hate it when she does that.
They explained they had come by to make sure we were ok, and to say that our parents had called at the temple and said they would be home later that day. I saw Usagi looking at Mamorou, and we locked eyes.
Soon, our eyes became crossed, and we burst out laughing. The others regarded us weirdly, and we laughed harder. Mamorou seemed shocked that we weren't fighting over him. I remember Mama saying that he needed his ego deflated every few days or so, so I didn't feel bad in the least.
That is, until Usagi and I lost our balance and toppled into the others, causing them to fall over. They said nothing at first, but soon we were laughing. We were all covered in mud, but laughing. Usagi and I leaned against each other, tears streaming down our faces.
Mamorou looked at me oddly, as if to ask what was going on. I smirked, giving him my "That's for em to know and for you to NEVER find out" look. Because, I realized that for the first time in my life, I could see what Usagi really was.
She wasn't my mother, or an angel in disguise. She wasn't Sailor Moon, or Princess Serenity. She wasn't a klutzy teenager, or one who pigged out. No. She was just, Usagi. She was her own category, and living life to the fullest. I decided I knew exactly what I was doing at that moment, no matter what anyone said. I could always look at Usagi and know see her for what she truly is, and know what I was going on about.
For the first time, I was seeing, really seeing.
Sorry if this confuzzled you, but I love this fic! It makes life a whole lot easier to understand when Chibiusa's around. I hope you all like this fic!