Disclaimer: Yo. Y'all know the drill. If we owned Star Wars, there would be no prequel trilogy (or if there was it'd be good) and if we owned House…well…I think I only rated this 'T' so I won't describe what we'd do with him…heehee.
A/N: See? We updated! Down angry mob, down! Anyways, sorry for the nine month wait…the story kind of needed a gestation period.
Chapter Seven: Leia turns the tables on Han
It'd been two days since House had (correctly) diagnosed Mr. Dallas with Lyme Disease. He was responding to treatment well and, hopefully, his girlfriend would let him back into the apartment the next day.
The team wasn't sure who they were most annoyed with; House for not treating the patient earlier and risking his life in the process, themselves for not "solving the problem" when it was unlikely they'd get another chance, or John Williams whose music had been BLASTING through House's speakers for the past two days.
Besides annoying them, the goal of this noise pollution seemed to be to keep people from hearing House. The moment it was determined Dallas had Lyme Disease, House had grabbed Wilson, dragged him into his office, and had been ranting to him nonstop. Wilson actually left periodically to keep appointments, but House didn't notice and simply continued rambling.
Despite being in the room with this even-crazier-than-usual House, Wilson seemed cheerful, insisting that they left House to it and that it would "all come out right in the end". These cryptic hints were all that Wilson would impart, leaving three super-curious ducklings.
Cuddy didn't really care, so long as the music was below the maximum noise limit of the hospital and the clinic hours got done. (Wilson filled in for House happily).
Currently, Wilson was in House's office reading a medical journal while House packed back and forth. Cameron sipped her coffee, vaguely wondering how Wilson could possibly read with all that noise and wishing for the billionth time she could read lips.
She sighed as the music segued into the Cantina theme from 'A New Hope'. Normally the morning was her favorite part of the day, when she could have time to herself in the break room. Chase wouldn't arrive for another ten minutes because he always stopped for breakfast at the little patisserie around the corner (House never reported him being late as long as he brought him something sweet as well,) and Foreman liked to get his clinic hours over with first thing.
Wilson was reclining with his feet on the desk and House had finally stopped pacing and was resting his head on the glass wall, banging his cane on the floor in time with the music when something inside Cameron snapped. She rose abruptly, knocking her lukewarm coffee to the floor and began to bang her fists on the connecting door between the break room and House's office. Wilson, grin on his face, grabbed his magazine and backed out of the office before House could stop him. With one final glare after him, House walked over to the door.
"Why are you making that infernal racket?" House said, throwing open the door in exasperation.
"You should talk, why are YOU making THAT infernal racket?" She was smirking peevishly as she said it, but nevertheless she walked briskly into the office, over to the stereo, and turned it off with a switch. Across the hall, nurses visibly sighed with relief, cheered, and one even removed a pair of earplugs. Cameron took a deep, calming breath, seating herself on one of the speakers and visibly reining in her frustration.
"Well, excellent job again Dr. House. You saved that patient's life." Her voice carried only a hint of sarcasm, and she her lips twitched in a smile when he rolled his eyes. "And more importantly to you, you really ticked off Chase and Foreman, solving it in about five seconds." That got a smile, she relaxed a bit and allowed herself to indulge her curiosity. "How did you know so fast? About the tick thing?"
"I was a boy scout when I was about nine," he said matter-of-factly, ignoring her shocked stare, "I may not have been a good one, something about the idea of doing one good deed per day, but I did earn my first aid badge. Lyme Disease, commonly spread by ticks which in turn are fairly common around campgrounds, was on the list of diseases whose symptoms we had to memorize." He plucked a book off his desk and tossed it to her, "Take a look, it's right in the manual. Usually presents with a rash, but 10 percent of the time, it doesn't. If undiagnosed, can cause quickened heart rate, fever, and even partial paralysis and is often mistaken for various other diseases. I would have thought of it earlier, but it was a part of my life that I usually block in my memory. Wouldn't have thought of it at all if there hadn't been this girl scout in the clinic with poison ivy and couldn't even recognize it."
She thumbed through the well worn manual, more shocked that he'd been a boy scout and had kept his old manual than she was at it having been the source of his epiphany. She put it down. He was looking at her out of the corner of his eye. She restrained a sigh and, resolved, launched into the speech she'd prepared while he'd been holed up in his office with Wilson as his hostage.
"House?" He turned to her. "I wanted to apologize for what happened at the movies…"
"Y'know," he cut her off, "I always preferred 'Return of the Jedi' to 'The Empire Strikes Back." She blinked, this was an unexpected course of conversation. "Well sure I may be a cynical bastard, but I'm equally mean to both men and women. No one can claim I'm a misogynist."
"I don't see where you're going with this."
"Well, you see, I always thought it was terribly sexist…those lines right before Han Solo was frozen." He took a step towards her, and her breath caught in her chest. What the hell was he doing?
"I always liked how, in Return of the Jedi, he was the one who had to…" he visibly swallowed as he grabbed her hand, "to gather the courage to lay it all on the line."
Cameron stared from her hand in his up into his eyes; hoping…waiting.
"Do you remember that part? They are cornered at the locked back door of the Empire's hold where the controls for the new death star's generator are. The stormtroopers are firing at them." He pulled her to her feet and set his cane against the now vacant speaker. "They are yelling at them to freeze, and Han Solo turns to Leia."
He lowered his face towards hers, they were barely a hair's breadth apart now. Gently, he brushed a thumb over the lovely faded shiner Wilson had caused the other day.
"I…" he faltered, then with a sudden look of resolve, finished. "I love you."
She looked up, half laughing, half crying.
They didn't even notice Wilson shaking his head and chuckling as House finally closed the space between them and kissed her.
A/N: IT'S FINALLY OVER! I'm terribly sorry to all of our faithful readers who have been waiting for this FOREVER. Please, will the angry mob now extinguish the torches, put the pitchforks back in the barn, find a decrepit road to use the tar on, give the chickens back their feathers, and give the railroad back it's rail? Thanks. Oh, and it's been brought to my attention by my geeky boyfriend that we got the name of what's-his-face wrong. It's Kyle Katarn, not Karl Katarn. Whatever. It's done! Yay! Now if only we can find the time to finish those other ones…
Extended Acknowledgements go to: WebMD for providing information on on Lyme Disease; Jeeves's mother for actually having Lyme Disease (though thankfully, not as bad as Dallas!) and inspiring that portion of the story; the Swiffer-Sweeper people; Wooster's friend Gena, who broke Wooster's ankle, giving us insight into how House moves; the Girl Scouts of America; Coca-Cola; Caffeine in general; The Princess Diaries novels; the torch and pitchfork makers of America; Bond, James Bond; Wooster's geeky boyfriend, the source of all random things Star Wars (but not Jeeves's ex-boyfriend, the dirty commie); anyone ever connected in any way with the original, not the new, Star Wars movies, especially Harrison Ford; and finally, the wonderful brain of David Shore and the wonderful acting skills of Hugh Laurie for creating the indomitable character we all love so much.