Screams in the Sound


Note: Tayuya's alive. I like the idea of Sasuke x Tayuya. Bite me. And perverted too, plus bleeped out Tayuya-talk (despite M rating)and a bit of OOC.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or any characters involved.


"Sasuke-kun is missing." Said Orochimaru plainly. Kabuto looked up from his Icha Icha Paradise Volume Two to his master. "He has been for three days."

"Orochimaru-sama, Tayuya-san is missing too." Said Kabuto. "They could be at the Murderer's Grill again. They go there often."

Orochimaru looked thoughtful for a moment. Then, very out of character for him, he burst out laughing. And not malicious evil laughter either. So it seriously creeped his underling out.

"Ano… Nani, Orochimaru-sama?" questioned Kabuto.

"Go check their rooms…" replied Orochimaru, hints of mirth seeping through. Shrugging, Kabuto walked off in the direction of Sasuke's room.

Orochimaru looked in both directions, then walked over to Kabuto's seat and used his freakishly long tongue to open Icha Icha Paradise.

"Damn you Jiraiya… Why did you have to be such a good author?"


Now, no one slept in the same hallway as Sasuke and Tayuya. They were both temperamental and crazy. And then Tayuya had a really fool tongue, except in the speaking sense and not in the physical sense like Orochimaru's tongue.

Although, much people would rather sleep in the hallway with Tayuya and Sasuke than Orochimaru. So basically, the hallway that Orochimaru's room was in, was empty save Kabuto's room.

Kabuto's eyes widened when he opened the door to that specific hallway. Moans, groans and screams. Slowly he lost his resolve and a little perverted blush grew on his face, very similar to the one Hatake Kakashi has when reading Icha Icha Paradise.

"OH F YEAAAAAAAAH! SASUKE-KUUUUUUUUUUUN!"

Kabuto then sat there for about half an hour, with this sick little perverted grin on his face, his glasses almost falling off his nose, the perverted blush and a bit of drool slipping out. Finally, there was panting and some voices.

"Tayuya-chan…"

"Ha-Ha-Hai…?"

"Are you happy now?"

"Hai."

"Good… I'm glad… I like making you happy…"

"You fg better like making me happy."

"I do."

"Great! Ready for the next three days?"

Kabuto's glasses slid off his nose, the drool dripped onto the floor and the pervy blush grew.

"W-W-What?"

"Uh-huh!"

"B-But… I haven't slept… Three days…"

"You don't think I'm hot? You don't think I'm F---G SEXY ENOUGH FOR YOU? IS THAT IT?"

"I-I love you… You're g-gorgeous… But I'm tired…"

"TOO BAD! I HAVE CHAINS YOU KNOW!"

"… Tie me up then."

Kabuto, in spite of his… State of mind, could literally hear the grin in Sasuke's voice.

"Alright then… If that's what you want…"

Kabuto hadn't been this happy in a long time. And he was happy or the next six hours. Just sitting there listening. Sick bastard.

"H-Hey… Wait… That looks kinda sharp…"

"You fought. You're my little slave for the rest of the day-."

"NO WAY!"

"And then I'm your slave for the next two."

"Deal."

"Good. Now this won't hurt a bit…"

"You're poking it in my as- AAAAAAHHHHHH!"

"YOU F--G WIMP! TAKE IT LIKE A MAN! YOU WANT ME DOING WHATEVER THE F- YOU WANT FOR TWO DAYS?"

"Hai… Itai…"

"THEN FOR THE NEXT… What time is it Sasuke-kun?"

"Um… Itai… Eight?"

"Arigato. FOR THE NEXT F--G FOUR HOURS, YOU DO WHATEVER THE HELL I SAY! AND THEN I DO WHATEVER THE F- YOU WANT FOR 48 HOURS AFTER! NOW SHUT THE F- UP AND- Oooooooohhhh… Good slave…"

Kabuto slid on the wall and listened with his expression growing more perverted by the minute. Without his knowledge, his brain had been writing down what he thought was going on in the room since he showed up, and hadn't stop, creating a dirty little book.

"Yeah… Good sla- OOOOOOOOHHHHHH! F- YEAH!"

Finally, after staying up for three days, Kabuto had made the ultimate porn book. It was all thanks to his closet pervertedness and hormones that had been blocked since childhood. Finally, he would finish the book with the fluff he was hearing.

"I love you."

"No I love you."

"But I love you more."

"I love you more."

"Mmm… Forgetting Itachi is worth staying with you. Very worth it…"

"… I think that's a good thing… Mmm…"

"It is. Want me to show you how good a thing it is?"

"F- yeah."

Kissing noises were heard. Kabuto grinned, pocketed the manuscript, and ran off.


Meanwhile in Konoha, Jiraiya went broke when the hentai book "Screaming Sound Nin" came out, starring Uchiha Sasuke and his lover and girlfriend, Tayuya. Many unimportant fangirls that yelled at Naruto in Chapter 3 of the manga killed themselves, but no one really cared. Ino was too busy cuddling with Gaara to care, and Sakura was trying to hide her uncontrollable goo-goo eyes from her boyfriend Lee. Naruto, who really isn't important to this story, eventually got together with TenTen, and every day at training he would have strange scars littering his body.

All was well.


THE END