Sleepless in Domino

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Warnings/notes : Seto/Joey, dialogue-only, major silly, ooc, hints at (phone-)sex, one word of very bad language.

Disclaimer : I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh. The movie 'Sleepless in Seattle' obviously isn't mine either.

written at 19th may 2004, by Misura, in reply to a post in the livejournal-community 400words by Jess, which offered as a line:

"The idea that I might get some sleep tonight deeply offends you, doesn't it?"

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

(23:04)

"Mutt, this had better be something very important."

"Hey, how did you know it was me?"

"I saw the number on my display, of course."

"You know my number by heart? Aww. That's so cute! It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside."

x-click-x

"Yeah, I love you too, Kaiba."

(23:15)

"Have you gathered enough brain-cells to figure out what it was you needed to call me about?"

"Geez, Kaiba, if it wasn't in the middle of the night, I'd swear you're having a morning-temper."

x-click-x

"Some people really don't have any sense of humor."

(23:29)

"What?"

"Are you going to stay on the line long enough for me to finish talking? Because if you don't, I'm not going to bother wasting my time."

x-click-x

"Hmm. Guess that counts as a 'no'."

(23:34)

"You're persistent, I'll give you that."

"Hey, you know what they say: third time's the charm."

"This is the fourth time."

"... I knew that."

x-click-x

"What did I say -now-?"

(23:41)

"Is there anything in particular you want, aside from harassing me?"

" 'Harassing you'? Is that what you call it? That hurts, Kaiba."

"I'm oh-so sorry to hear that."

"No, seriously. I thought you -liked- it. In fact, I seem to remember you liking it quite a lot."

"What are you garbling about?"

"Me harassing you. You know, that day in the office, and that time in the elevator, and - "

x-click-x

"Did I say something wrong?"

(23:56)

"This is the last time."

"I should hope so. If you didn't keep hanging up on me, I wouldn't need to call you time and time again, you know."

"I suppose it would be too much to expect of you to conclude from my actions that I am in no mood to have a conversation with you."

"Yup. Playing dumb's something I'm really good at."

"Probably because you have such a rich, first-hand experience with the real thing."

"Are we going to trade insults? Because I came up with some really good ones during these past three days that you have been gone."

"No, we are -not- going to trade insults. -You- are going to tell me why you feel you have the right to rob me from my well-deserved night-rest, after which -I- will prove to you that you were wrong."

"Well ... I can't sleep."

Silence.

"And it's -your- fault."

"-My- fault? Oh, I see. The puppy misses its master so badly that it's unable to depart to the land of dreams."

"... I would prefer not being referred to as an 'it'. 'Puppy', I can handle, but not 'it'."

"Very well, the puppy misses -his- master. And what, pray, am I to do about that? You can hardly expect me to drop everything and take the first flight back home."

"A guy can hope, right?"

Silence.

"Don't hang up! I was only kidding."

"I am waiting, pup."

"First of all, I'm not missing you. That is: me missing you isn't why I can't fall asleep."

"So ... what -is- the reason?"

"I ... can't sleep."

"You already informed me of that fact. I thought we'd agreed to get to the point so that we could both enjoy a good night's rest."

"Well, I hoped that maybe you'd help me."

"Provided I'd even want to, how can I, if you refuse to tell me the problem?"

"Aww, come on, Seto. You -know- there's one thing that always leaves me feeling very tired and sleepy afterwards."

Silence.

"Don't you care about me at all?"

"Don't try using emotional blackmail on me, mutt. It doesn't work."

"Too much exposure to Mokuba, I suppose."

"And don't interrupt me when I'm thinking."

Silence.

"Amazing. You're actually able to keep your mouth shut if someone orders you to do so."

"Doesn't that deserve a reward?"

"Hmm. Maybe. But ... you'd really want to do -that- with me? By phone, in the middle of the night? I mean, I've heard of it being done that way, yet I've never done it myself. How do you know if it's going to be any good?"

"I don't. Still ... no harm in trying, is there? Come on, Kaiba, where's your sense of adventure?"

"Oh, all right. You'd probably bug me until I'd give in anyway."

" ... No comment."

"Smart puppy. Give me a few moments to ... there, that's better."

"Do you think we could start this some time -tonight-?"

"Patience, patience. Do you have your maths-book nearby?"

" ... what would I need -that- for?"

"You requested to do something, I quote, 'that always leaves you feeling very tired and sleepy afterwards'. It's a terrible drain on me to help you with maths too, but I guess the sacrifice is necessary."

"I did -not- mean maths-homework when I said that!"

"I cannot think of anything else fitting the description."

" ... I hate you."

"Does that mean you'll stop calling me?"

"Why did I ever think -you- were going to get any nicer after becoming my boyfriend?"

"Because you lack a brain? It's late, puppy. Go back to bed."

"(beep) you."

"Such language. You really need someone to teach you manners."

x-click-x

"Sweet dreams, Joey."

x-beeeeeeep-x

"I miss you too."

OWARI