Standard disclaimers apply.
Chapter 6 Everybody Else
Target no. 4 & 5: Yamanaka Ino (love her) and Haruno Sakura (hate her)
(Biased? I know. grins wickedly)
Haruno Sakura was on higher ground than cloud nine. She, along with other girls, quickly left the building to retrieve money and daydream the events likely to happen when she finally had the precious Uchiha in her possession. Even it is for a week.
She swooned. When that week was over, she was more than sure that her Sasuke-kuuun will only have eyes for her and only her.
Her blissful thoughts however, were cut short due to a mass of light blond locks standing a few yards away.
"Ino-pig." she muttered heatedly as she glared at her ex-best friend's back.
The said latter felt someone staring and turned around while raising a perfectly groomed eyebrow. "Forehead-girl." she greeted curtly.
A tense silence enveloped as the two kunoichi stared at each other. A strong gust blew and the onlookers watched with bated breath as they wait for the foreboding catfight to ensue.
A deep breath and then,
"INO-PIG!" the pink haired shouted, pointing a finger with matching vein popping in her forehead.
"FOREHEAD-GIRL!" the blond doing the same.
"YOU ARE SO NOT GOING TO GET SASUKE-KUN!"
"O really? And what makes you so sure, hmm? Sakura-chaaaan?" Ino mimicked Naruto.
A vein popped in amidst the vast pink. "Why you! You want a piece of me, pig?!"
"Yeah! I want a piece of your forehead so people wouldn't be blinded when they look at that massive canvas of yours! Hahaha!" She shrieked in laughter.
Sakura's annoyance was rapidly rising. "That's it!" She lunged at the laughing blond and both were now rolling on the dusty ground, wrestling and giving each other incoherent curses. Loud cheers erupted as the crowd thickened to watch the battle.
"Oi, I bet 500 yen that Yamanaka's gonna win this one." A handsome onlooker told his friend.
"No way man! Haruno's totally kicking her ass!"
"Well that's because she's such a tomboy. My Ino's one of the best kunoichi around and she's still as beautiful and feminine as the lovely flowers she tends to." The fanboy's eyes shone with adoration. His friend was outraged.
"How dare you call my Sakura a tomboy, you bastard!"
"You want one, jerk?!"
And so the riot between the fanboys began. Ninjas all over Konoha tried in vain to settle the crowd but it was pointless. Behind the insanity, a nonchalant Shikamaru and a forever-eating Chouji passed by. They both shook their heads.
"Women are so troublesome."
Target no. 6, 7 & 8: Rock Lee, Ten-ten (just what is her surname?!), Hyuga Neji
"Yosh!" A rather enthusiastic Rock Lee raised his fist in the air. "Finally, a chance to help someone and spread the way of the true Konoha shinobi! If only Gai-sensei could see me now, he would be so proud!" He wept in complete joy. Ten-ten, however, seemed unconvinced.
"Lee, doesn't it bother you that Iruka-sensei never mentioned any incentive or point in all of this?" she asked. But her teammate was too busy seeing stars and daydreaming to pay her any attention. A large vein popped in her forehead.
"Hey! Are you even listening to me?!"
A very adorable and chibified Lee turned his head to her. "No."
She shook in great annoyance. "What?!"
And before he could defend himself, Ten-ten had already sent him flying across town. After a few moments, Rock Lee landed in front of Hinata's teammates, Kiba and Shino. They peered at his unconscious form.
"I'm wildly guessing that this is Ten-ten's doing." Shino remarked.
Kiba nodded. "Yeah. It probably is her time of the month."
"So what are we gonna do to him?"
Back at the other side of town, Ten-ten turned to her other companion, Hyuga Neji and fumed.
"You agree with me don't you?! Well?! What do you have to say for yourself, huh?!"
The usually calm bishounen sweatdropped. Was he the only sane person left on the planet? But not wanting to suffer Lee's fate, he tried to calm the kunoichi.
"Relax, Ten-ten. I admit it seems quite point less but it was Tsunade-sama's orders so we musn't complain about it."
"Hmph! All I know is there should be some reward or prize for putting up with all this insanity! Gah! It's so irritating!" she exclaimed as she marched off leaving Neji behind.
Never did they notice that somebody was watching them from behind the shadows.
Two cloaked figures emerged and leaned close together, whispering. The one with the pink cloak was frantically taking down notes.
"Did you get what she said?" A male voice came from under the blue cloak.
The figure nodded. "Good. This ought to be a decent report. Let's go!"
Quickly as they vanished, the pink and blue cloaked figures reappeared in front of the door of Tsunade's office. Just as they were about to knock, the door opened revealing an exhausted Iruka. Upon seeing who was outside, the shinobi jumped back.
"Gaah!" he shrieked while clutching his chest. Annoyed about the commotion in her office, the Godaime slapped her hand on the table. "Can you cut it down? I'm trying to think here!"
The three became silent and Tsunade sat back down.
"I guess you have something to report?" she asked the cloaked strangers.
The two lowered their hoods. Hatake Kakashi and Tsunade's assistant, Shizune stood in front of the desk.
The female Hokage drummed her fingers, disinterested. "Well, what did you find out?"
Her assistant looked apprehensive. "Anou…"
"They want something in return." Kakashi said frankly.
She raised a quizzical eyebrow. "What?"
The infamous copy ninja shrugged. "They wanted some sort of incentive for, and I quote: 'putting up with this insanity' unquote."
"Really?" Tsunade smirked. "Now that you think about it… I guess I should cut them some slack."
Meanwhile, Iruka finally regained his composure. He cleared his throat.
"Anyway, we should probably go back to the Academy, Tsunade-sama. The kids are probably there already." he said as he stood to leave.
Tsunade followed suit. "Yes, we probably shoud go. Are Kurenai and Anko there with the costumes?"
"Hai, Hokage-sama." Iruka sighed. 'This is much more tiring than a survival mission.' he thought.
The female Hokage smiled happily. "Good, good." And you two," she looked towards Shizune and Kakashi, who both stood more erect. "Keep those reports coming, eh?"
The cloaked ninjas did a mock salute. "Hai!"
Tsunade walked out of her office with extremely high spirits. Even more so when she entered the 'dressing room' and saw Kurenai and Anko arranging the colorful yet revealing garments. She approached them with a big grin on her face.
"Hello, ladies! Are you ready?"
He felt as if he was walking towards his own grave. As the Academy building loomed closer and closer, he took a deep breath and exuded his most calm and collected expression, a stark contrast of what he was actually feeling. He searched the area for any sign of the Hyuga heiress but instead, he caught the attention of someone else.
And for once, Uchiha Sasuke had wished that he had caught the attention of a mob of his rabid fan girls instead.
But fate was cruel. Of all the people right now, he just had to come in contact with Iruka-sensei. The latter, however, was oblivious to the young brunette's subtle death glare.
"Sasuke! There you are. Are you ready?"
The hell I am, you prick. "You can say that sensei."
"That's good to hear. But I suggest that you go inside and get dressed. You guys are to use the room next to the function hall, where the auction will take place. "
I should probably kick your balls right now, Iruka. "Maybe a bit later, sir. I'm still waiting for Hin—somebody."
The elder jounin chuckled. "Come on now, no need to be nervous. It's only for one week. If you want, I'll take you to the dressing room." he placed a firm hand on the young shinobi's shoulder, half-steering him towards the Academy.
At this, Sasuke started to panic inside. Saying no to the jounin would arouse suspicion and he would have to mention Hinata thus leading to the plan's failure. Coming with him would also be a bad idea because he wouldn't be able to give his money to the Hyuga and won't have the chance to do it later. It was one of those priceless lose-lose situations. He prayed so hard that Hinata will appear from behind the gates and save him again from certain doom.
As luck would have it, Hinata actually appeared from behind the gates. She was surprised when she fixed her eyes on the Academy and saw Iruka dragging Sasuke inside. The Uchiha directed an expression that only screamed one thing:
'HELP ME, DAMNIT!'
The female Hyuga quickened her pace. Sasuke hasn't given her the money yet. Not that she was some charity case or something but whatever.
The young Uchiha was now nearing hysteria. He grabbed his wallet from his pocket and did the only logical way to give it to Hinata.
Uchiha Sasuke threw his wallet at her.
But he threw it at such a force that it caught her off guard and…
Hit the poor girl straight on her forehead, making her an impromptu version of Sleeping Beauty.
They stopped in front of the door labeled 'dressing room'. Iruka took a deep breath and knocked three times. After a few seconds, the jounin Anko answered the door.
"Hai? What do you want?" she asked.
Iruka stepped aside to show a reluctant Sasuke. Anko's face brightened.
"Oho! Wait, don't tell me, don't tell me! He's the first genie, right?"
When she saw Iruka nod and smile, she clasped her hands together.
"That's great! This auction will be more interesting than I thought."
She then grabbed Sasuke by the shoulder and pulled him inside. "We'll be taking care of him for a while. Ja!" With that, she slammed the door shut.
"Oi, Hinata-chan, wake up!"
Hinata felt something lick the back of her hand. She opened her eyes and saw Shino, Kiba and Akamaru kneeling beside her. She sat up.
"What happened?" she asked.
"You tell us, we just found you there on the ground." Kiba shrugged. "By the way," he added, pulling out a familiar object. "Is this yours?"
Hinata immediately recognized it as Sasuke's wallet. She blushed as she realized how ridiculous she must have looked a few moments ago. Her teammates looked at her curiously. She snapped from her daze and nodded.
"Uh, hai, Kiba-kun. It's mine. Arigatou."
Kiba gave her a wolfish grin and handed her 'her' wallet. "Good thing we found it eh, Shino? Some creep might have stolen it."
The bespectacled boy nodded the stood up. "We should get inside now, guys. Everybody's probably there already."
His teammates followed suit. "Yeah, better get this thing over with neh, Akamaru?"
And together, Team 9 went inside the Academy building. As they neared the function hall, they noticed two figures hanging out the corridor. It was Shikamaru and Chouji. What piqued their interest, however, was that they were wearing some sort of armor and were now strapping helmets to their heads. Kiba shrieked with laughter.
"Just what the hell is that?"
The two looked at him seriously.
"It's a full body armor, you ignoramus." Shikamaru replied.
They dog boy gradually ceased in laughing and wiped the tears from his eyes.
"I know what it is." he retorted. "What I meant was, 'what's it for?'."
Without hesitation, the armored two replied in unison.
The members of Team 9 including Akamaru, all raised their eyebrows questioningly.
"R…FG?" they repeated. Chouji nodded.
"Hai. Rabid Fan Girls."
Seeing that their message was not clear, the lazy ninja sighed.
"Long story short. The Uchiha will be up for grabs and he'll be wearing a god-forsaken Arabian Nights costume."
"It's like giving a piece of steak to a den of deranged female lions." Chouji added.
"Precisely." Shikamaru nodded.
The three finally understood the crazy logic of it all. Kiba scratched the back of his head sheepishly.
"Uh, listen. I was just wondering…"
"Nope. We don't have any spare armor left."
"Really? Oh man…"
Shino glanced at Kiba. "Don't worry we can defend ourselves, just in case."
"Are? Daijoubu, Hinata-san? You don't look very well."
All eyes turned to the Hyuga. True enough, she looked paler due to the horrible realization as she listened to Shikamaru and Chouji's explanation.
A den of deranged female lions…
Suddenly, she had the strong urge of throwing Sasuke's wallet out of the window and pretending that she never had it. But as the images of him practically begging her to help, flooded her mind… As she lightly touched the swollen bump where his wallet had collided with her forehead… she sighed, defeated.
"Fine. I'll help him." she said.
The four blinked. "Help who, Hinata-chan?" Shino asked.
The shy kunoichi blushed from embarrassment. Was she thinking aloud again?
"Uh, no one, Shino-kun. Shall we now go on inside?" she asked, hoping that they'll drop the subject.
Chouji grinned and slammed his fist on his steel-covered chest as if to test its strength.
"Yosh! Let's go!"
Sasuke took the moment to observe the room. It was bare except for a couple of chairs and table where a bunch of various Arabian Nights costumes were neatly piled. What intrigued him most, however, was the large circle drawn at the center of the floor.
"So… The Uchiha, eh?"
Tsunade's voice rang across the room. He looked up and saw the Godaime standing a few feet away from him, the circle right between them. She took a step closer to him and he saw both Anko and Kurenai do the same. Soon, they were circling around him, observing him from head to foot. He gulped. Were they going to assault him? Is this some sick twisted joke? Or worse… Were they secretly members of his fan club out to pursue him? His fears worsened when all three then stood back just outside the circle and kneeled as if preparing to do some jutsu.
Kurenai sensed his tension.
"We're not gonna do anything bad Sasuke-san. Just stand in the center of that circle and relax."
"I think he'll look good in maroon." Tsunade remarked.
"I agree." Anko smirked. "Ready?"
"Okay, now!" Simultaneously, all three women drove their palms to the floor. Sasuke vanished behind a puff of smoke and when he reemerged, he was now wearing a different set of clothes. His blue shirt and white shorts were now gone and instead, he was clad in a maroon vest (with no undershirt or whatsoever) and matching maroon balloon pants. (I don't know exactly how to describe them but if you've seen the movie Aladdin, you'll understand. Work with me, people. I've just recently recovered from writer's block.)
The three seemed satisfied. "Well that's that." You may now go to the auction Uchiha." Tsunade said.
Anko giggled and slapped her hand at Sasuke's back. "The auction's in the next room. And to prevent you from escaping," she added "you are going to use this door." She led him to the door that connected both the function hall and 'dressing room'.
As the five adolescents entered the function hall, they were not surprised to see almost all females sat at the front row with the exception of Ten-Ten, Temari, and the girl whom Team 9 recognized as Kurenai's little sister. She waved at them from the back. As they sat beside her, she glanced over to Chouji and Shikamaru, eyeing their armor. She grinned.
"Rabid fan girl armor. Cool." She dug in her pockets, "I brought my own patented RFG repelling apparatus too, you know." She held out a thin leather bound object.
Kiba raised an amused eyebrow.
"Oh really? What is it, Natsumi-chan?"
"Gai-sensei's picture." She replied as she showed them the photo showing Gai in his full 'suave' glory (basically his 'Mr. Nice Guy Pose'). All of them noticeably winced and leaned away.
"I've got to say that it is certainly effective." Chouji remarked.
"Really? Thanks!" Natsumi giggled, making the chubby shinobi turn a tinge of pink.
As they were about to engage in another conversation, the room was then interrupted by a certain someone's arrival.
As Sasuke disappeared behind the door, Tsunade held out three fingers.
"Three… Two… One."
Multiple screams suddenly erupted from the next room. The Hokage looked at Kurenai and Anko then smirked.
"Told you, he'll look good in maroon."
Meanwhile, amidst the riot in the front part of the function hall, Iruka and the rest could only sweatdrop. But the jounin has to admit, Sasuke looked much better-looking than ever but… never mind. He sighed exasperatedly.
"And so the auction begins." he muttered.
End of Chapter 6
Yuri-chan's note: Ha! She finally updates this chapter after the longest time. Hehe. Sorry for taking so long you guys. I made this chapter extra long to make it up to you people.
You will review this chapter, right?