Title: Swapping the World
Adam/Fiona, post-3x10, pg-13
Summary: Fiona can't be strong all the time.
It had been an unfamiliar experience for Fiona Carter. She was a highly trained MI-5 agent, skilled to the highest of levels, able to get herself out of any situation she had so far found herself in. Not this time. This time Fiona had been well and truly stuck, despite a near escape. It had been easier in some ways when Danny was there with her, but equally difficult at the same time. He'd given her the company and the comfort she would never admit she had needed so badly. But he'd been someone else she'd had to look out for; whether he needed her to or not.
She hadn't been able to save him; there was absolutely nothing she could do. She'd lost both a fellow agent and a person swiftly becoming a friend in Danny that day; she had been forced to pull her beloved husband into this sick terrorist's games in order to save the son she sometimes felt she barely knew from terror still unknown to him. She hoped he never grew up to realise the evil present in the world, all the while knowing it naïve and stupid to wish for such an unrealistic thing.
She'd proclaimed her love to her husband in front of others; something she almost never did. She needed him to know that despite her cool exterior he was the one who knew her the best, the only one to know the true Fiona in her entirety. She needed him to know how important he had and always would be to her. She was lucky; she now got to carry on with her life with him knowing that, if he hadn't done already.
She regretted not knowing her son better. She vowed to spend more time with him, while at the same time knowing it unlikely she would change her habits a great deal. She would pick herself up again, she would carry on and put this horrific experience behind her as she had done so previously. But not yet.
She could usually hide everything inside of her, behind steel walls she had learned to build up to reduce the incentive for others to hurt her further. This time she couldn't. As Adam ran to her faster than she'd ever seen him run, she almost collapsed. If asked about it later, she'd say it was due to shock. But it wasn't that alone; it was relief, and hope, and need all mixed in together.
He wrapped his arms around her tightly as she stood revelling in the familiarity.
'Danny,' she whispered, squeezing her eyes shut, releasing a tear to fall down her cheek.
'I know,' he replied, his throat tight. He tightened his hold on her, and started stroking her hair.
'Adam,' she choked, finally wrapping her arms around his waist.
'I'm here, I'm here,' he murmured.
And finally she cried. She let everyone who was there see how much this had affected her, she let fellow officers and police officers she'd probably never see again witness her walls crumble and the pain and fear she'd just been through come pouring out as she clung to her husband. The great Fiona Carter was momentarily broken, and this time it was more than just Adam watching.
Later that night Adam returned from the bathroom to the sight of his wife curled up into a ball in the middle of their bed. He carefully climbed in beside her, stroking her hair and placing a gentle kiss on her forehead.
She appeared fast asleep so he smiled to himself and wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling the cover over them both. 'I wouldn't swap you for the whole world,' he whispered, repeating his words of that morning, seemingly so far away now.
As he settled down behind her he missed the smallest flicker of a smile that illuminated her tired face, before she whispered back to him, 'I wouldn't swap you for two.'