Summary: Kind of like a Prequel to my story "The Marauders Seventh Year". It's the summer before Sirius's seventh year, he comes up with a hex.
Not a slash fic.
Sirius Black sat in a chair in his living room. He was bored to, almost, death, and had nothing to do. And it was hot, and seeing how it is summer it would be hot. No one was at home. No one meaning: James, Remus, or Peter. Yes not even Peter was home. Sirius was at his own place lonely, and hot.
"Okay," Sirius said, jumping from his chair. "I need to find something to do."
He walked around his house searching for oblivious fun things to do. He gave up after awhile. And soon was sunken back into his chair in his living room. He sat, twirling his wand absent-mindedly in his fingers.
While twirling, his fingers got jumbled, and the wand flew out of his hand. He watched as it fell. When it did, it turned his little end stand into a pair of boxers. Sirius cocked his head a little. His mind was buzzing with little calculations. If you could call pranks calculations.
"Yes!" He yelled at once, and grabbed his wand. He turned his nightstand back, and went up to his room.
He was going to create his own hex. He did turn of age to do magic just a month ago. He smiled mischievously and rubbed his hands together. He grabbed his wand and stared at his bed. With a flick of his wand it turned into a bra.
This is when he grabbed his parchment and quill. He started writing down what, and how, to change inanimate objects into undergarments. He practiced, and practiced. By dinnertime he had memorized the flicks and waves of his wand.
"Hmmm…There needs to be more…" Sirius said.
He decided to take a break. No need to waste all your time on one hex. He had all summer. He went downstairs to fix himself something to eat. He also went to bed early. 'I need my rest.' Or so he says.
Remus and James looked at Sirius's house. It has been almost the whole summer, and they haven't seen him.
"I'm afraid he might be dead in there or something." James said, as they walked up his steps.
"I don't think he would be. He is stubborn, and wouldn't let himself die." Remus said.
They knocked on the door. They waited. And waited. Nothing. Not a sound from the house. Finally there was a voice.
"I'm not home! Leave me be!"
Remus gave James a weird look. "Was that like an auto response?"
"Do you think he put it on the door?"
"I don't know, but I wouldn't open it. The doorknob might be cursed."
The two of them left his porch. They decided to go take a visit to Lily. Sirius was inside though. He hadn't heard them come by.
Inside Sirius had created a monster. It was a little test subject. Sirius knew you couldn't test any charms and such on animals. It was against the law. So he created a little monster so he could test his hex.
"Now I want this thing to strip off its clothes." Sirius said to himself. He concentrated on the little monster. The monster had no face, or ears. It had nothing. Sirius didn't even think it had a brain.
He flicked his wand, and the little monster (who he has dubbed Yimik), stripped its clothes off, and then fell dead like.
"Perfect! Now to dress again."
He dressed Yimik again, and practiced. And practiced. And practiced some more. He also got little Yimik to dance around, and do flips. This was a plus to his hex.
"I need a human though…" Sirius said. He thought a little bit, and then he got it. "Remus!"
Sirius apparated, yes he has his license too, to Remus' room. It was two thirty in the morning, and Remus was sound asleep in his bed. Sirius held a little piece of parchment, and a quill. On the piece of parchment he had written:
I (blank, blank, blank) give Sirius Orion Black permission to test his new hex on myself.
He smiled mischievously, and tapped Remus's shoulder. Remus grunted a little, and opened his eyes half way. "What, Sirius?"
"Can you sign something for me?" He asked.
"A consent form saying I can test my hex on you. It would be against the law if I didn't have your consent."
"Yeah sure…where is it."
Remus was only half awake, unaware of what he was getting into. He signed his name (Remus John Lupin) and went right back to sleep. Sirius disapperated to his own home.
Tomorrow was going to be teatime.
Remus sat in Sirius's living room. It was odd. Sirius never had teatime. He looked around his living room and he spotted Yimik in a corner. When Sirius came back in, with their cups of tea, Remus pointed and asked, "Padfoot, what is that?"
"Oh that's Yimik. A test subject." Sirius said, passing him his cup.
Remus took a sip, and Sirius added five cubes of sugar in his tea. "A test subject? There's more?"
"Yes. You're one Moony."
Remus choked on his tea. He wiped his mouth, and stared at Sirius. "Excuse me?"
"You're a test subject!" Sirius said. He gulped his tea down, and set his cup down.
"I am not a test subject Sirius."
"Oh yes you are! I got your consent."
Remus gave him a weird look. Sirius pulled out the parchment. He showed it to him. Remus was confused. "I never signed this!" He cried. "You must have forged it!"
"No I did not. You signed this last night. I was there. I saw it."
"Of course! You did! I was sleeping, wasn't I?"
"No you were semi-asleep."
Remus didn't know what to say. After a long silence, Remus gave in. "Fi…Fine…What do I have to do?"
"Oh nothing that'll kill you. Might harm you a bit."
Remus was in the kitchen, with the window's shut and doors locked. There was underwear on the table next to him. He was scared. Sirius's mind was strange, and he didn't want to be hurt by it.
Sirius swung open the kitchen door, making Remus jump. "I've always wanted to do that! Now down to business. I will do a simple operation--"
"What? Operation?" Remus asked. Sirius waved his hand.
"I've, also, always wanted to say that."
Sirius took out his wand, and held it up. Remus scooted back a little. Sirius flicked his wand a certain way, and Remus could feel his body go out of control.
He got up, tore off his shirt, and put the underwear on his head. This is what was to be expected, but what Remus did next was absolutely hilarious.
"Quack, bark, moo!" Remus yelled. He was jumping up and down, flapping his arms. Sirius just watched.
"Pooh! Dog! Foot! Pad foot! Nooo! Shush!" Remus yelled.
Sirius couldn't take it. He held his sides, and laughed. He laughed until he couldn't breath, and tears were steaming out of his eyes.
Remus did one back flip, and landed on his back. He screamed out in pain, and Sirius helped him up. That was when he was done laughing.
"I swear Sirius you'd better have something to get my back to stop hurting. Or else." Remus growled.
Sirius wiped away the last of his tears, and led him to his bathroom. He had a little pain killer potion, and he gave it to Remus. Remus drank it, and in minutes he could stop bending over.
"Teatime is over!" Sirius said, clapping his hands together. "And will you forgive me?"
Remus thought about it. He sighed, and smiled. "I guess it would be a good prank to pull on Malfoy or Snape."
Sirius smiled, his little bad smile, and followed Remus out of the bathroom. Remus stretched a little, before sitting on the couch.
"Don't tell Lily, Wormtail, and Prongs about this." Sirius said.
"Why don't we visit Prongs? I promise not to tell." He added. Sirius nodded.
"Haven't been out of the house all summer. Sure, it would be nice to visit someone before school."
They grabbed their wands. "By the way, what is the name of this new hex?" Remus asked.
Sirius thought. He smiled. "Kukuclocklikings!"
And they apparated away.
Megumi: Hello ppl! And for those who would like to read The Marauders Seventh Year, it's still there. Although I would like to take it down and re-due it. Anyway leave your comments in a review please!
(BTW: It's Yim-ik)