Disclaimer: I do not own LOST or Whose Line Is It Anyway? I am just having fun, yada yada yada. Anyways onto the story!
AN: I just edited this story a little bit to make things a little easier to understand. I just realized that the reason why this seemed a bit more confusing was because the stars I used to mark actions, don't show up for some reason because of some thing. Anyways, I also added a few things that I've changed due to new information revealed in Exodus Pt. 1. Hope that helps a bit. Oh and ( ) represent actions.
Whose Line Is It Anyway: LOST Style
Chapter 1: Party Quirks
Announcer: This is Whose Line Is It Anyways?
(APPLAUSE sign flashes.)
Announcer: With our host Christina!
(A blonde haired, blue eyed girl goes and sits behind the desk.)
Christina: Welcome to Whose Line Is It Anyway? The show where everything is made up and the points don't matter just like medical insurance on a deserted island…it doesn't matter! We are currently at a undisclosed location on the LOST island, and with us tonight are the castaways from Oceanic Flight 815!
(The audience is composed of all castaways, who don't seem amused in the least being in the room.)
Christina: Now in exchange for them all being gracious enough to be on the show, I promised every survivor a present of some kind that I will give to them. Once every episode someone will get their reward…so stay tuned. Now give it up for our first Panelists!
(There is scattered applause in the audience.)
Christina: C'mon guys…it's not like I'm holding you here against your will or something.
Christina: That wasn't nice Scott…I mean Steve. But anyways here they our panelists Charlie Bloody Rock God Pace…
(There is applause as Charlie takes his seat and smiles at Claire in the audience.)
Christina: Sawyer a.k.a. James The Chain-Smoking Jacka Ford!
(Sawyer rolls his eyes and lights up a cigarette.)
Christina: None of that Sawyer…I don't want my lungs to be poisoned.
Sawyer: And I don't want to be on this retarded show…so we're even.
(Christina rolls her eyes, knowing it's useless when it comes to Sawyer.)
Christina: Our next panelist is Hurley actually Hugo Pee On It Reyes.
(There is applause as Hurley takes his seat.)
Christina: And finally John Don't Tell Me What I Can't Do Locke!
(Locke quietly takes his seat surveying the room.)
Christina: Now our first game tonight is going to be Party Quirks. This is for all four panelists. Hurley is going to be hosting a party and Charlie, Sawyer and Locke are going to be the party guests. Now on their cards they have all been assigned a weird quirk or identity and at the end Hurley is going to try and guess who they are. Now come in one by one when I ring the bell. Ok, anytime your ready Hurley you may begin.
Hurley: Alright, let's party. We've actually survived 40 days on this island…that's something to celebrate. I got all the food here…boar, fish, bananas...and even some of those nasty urchins Jin loves so much.
Hurley: Where that bell came from I have no idea…
(Shrugs and walks to the door to open it.)
Hurley: Hi Charlie…welcome to my new penthouse cave.
(Anonymous red shirt extra holds a sign up so the audience can read it but Hurley can't. It says: Thinks Hurley's eyes have lasers in him and are hurting him every time he looks at him.)
(Charlie screams like a girl.)
Charlie: Oww! It burns! You're hurting me…what did I ever do to you?
Hurley: I'm not even touching you dude.
Charlie: Liar! Help…911!
(Charlie runs to the desk and tries to hide behind it.)
(Hurley opens the "door" and Sawyer walks forward.)
(Red shirt holds up the next sign which says: Mother of the other three.)
Hurley: Hello man, there is plenty of food over there if you want it.
Sawyer: Now Hurley, my little Stay Puff, you really need to loose weight. It's not healthy.
(Pinches his cheek.)
Hurley: Are you ok?
Sawyer: Of course I am!
(Sawyer walks over to Charlie.)
Sawyer: Now if I told you once I've told you a million times, there is no boogieman out to get you Charlie!
Charlie: Yeah whatever…
(Hurley glances at Charlie.)
(Charlie ducks under the desk again.)
Hurley: I'm not trying to kill you or something.
(Hurley opens the door to see Locke standing before him.)
Hurley: Hey Locke! How are you?
(Red shirt sign says: Indiana Jones on a dangerous quest.)
Locke: I would be much better if there weren't….snakes. I HATE snakes!
(Glares at a spot on the ground.)
Locke: You bite me and I'll bite you back!
(Locke shudders and moves to stand upon the empty seats.)
Locke: Something is not right here, not at all. Don't move anyone…you might spring a trap!
Hurley: Alright Indiana Jones, can it!
Christina: Good job.
Charlie: It hurts me, stop please!
Hurley: Alright, my eyes are not burnings holes into you or whatever.
Christina: Close it was actually your eyes are lazers.
Sawyer: So mean to your little brother, what did he ever do to you?
Hurley: You are not our mother Sawyer!
Christina: Right! Good job and I'll give 1,000 points to each of you. And it's present time for one lucky castaway….would Claire Littleton come forward please?
(Claire walks over holding her son.)
Christina: Claire I am giving you a lifetime supply of peanut butter…because I love peanut butter moments. Oh and here is a baby bag of goodies for little Turnip-Head.
(Charlie blushed slightly and Claire smiled and thanked Christina.)
Christina: Well we will go to our break now, but stick around for more Whose Line Is It Anyway?
AN: Alright, as some of you might know I have made Whose Line stories for Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings. Because I have been breathing the best show ever, LOST, it was only necessary for me to make a LOST one. Hope you like, any suggestions for who should get a present next? Until next time, seeya, don't let the "others" bite.