Emperor Xander
by Chaoseternus

I do not own, nor do I cliam ownership of characters/concepts from Buffy the Vampire Slayer or Gamesworkshops Warhammer 40,000

Please read and review

Note that due to the sheer 'Deus Ex Machina' represented by the God-Emperor of Mankind, that I will NOT be doing a sequal... sorry if you like this and want one.


Xander snorted, glancing contemptuously at the red dress Buffy and Willow were ohh and ahhing over. It was nice to be sure, but if they wanted to impress Angel that wasn't the way. Sure, he didn't like deadboy but he respected him to a point and had at least bothered to listen to every detail on those few occasions Angel had discussed his past. He knew Angel had hated the ‘vapid airheads' of that period and whilst he might really like the thought of Buffy wearing that, he had little doubt it would be enough to make him renounce spandex, it would do Buffy a disservice to allow her to wear a costume her knew her target would not like.

“"Buffy,”" Xander started, his eyes rolling as he interrupted his friends, “"remember the last time Angel had to talk about his past?”"

He ignored the puzzled and somewhat startled looks from his friends, just waited for their nods.

“"What did he say about the ladies of that” he nodded at the dress “period?”"

"“Well,”" Willow replied, “"that they were useless vapid..."” the penny dropped, “"ohh”"

"“Not such a good idea?”" Buffy asked.

"“Not such a good idea"” Willow confirmed.

“"Thanks Xander”"

Xander shook himself back to the present, Buffy kissed me, Buffy kissed me… Okay, it was a quick thank you peck on the check but… Buffy Kissed Me!

“"So..." Buffy's amused tone snapped him back to the present with a start, "“Any suggestions since you just saved me from a boyfriend related disaster”"

Xander winced at the boyfriend comment, but it was Buffy asking so he considered it seriously, “"well, whatever happens, you have to dress up as somebody strong willed since you wish to impress deadboy and he doesn't like airheads... but" Xander paused, then looked Buffy straight in the eyes, “"we are a team, and I think we should chose costumes that reflect that”"

He grimaced sardonically, "“but it will have to be a five dollar costume for me, I'm a little low on funds”"

Xander caught Willow and Buffy exchanging a significant look and began to worry, “"oh don't worry Xander, I'm sure we can find something suitable..."


Xander smiled at Joyce as he walked into the Summer's house, “"Miss Summers, always a pleasure to see such a vision of beauty and youth”"

She snorted, amused by the flirting, “"you're just after some homemade cookies off the batch I made earlier"

Xanders smiled, “"homemade cookies? New batch? Miss Summer, how many would you give me for my soul? It has to be worth five cookies at...Gagh”!"

Smirking, Joyce glanced up the stairs at her daughter, “"You owe me five bucks lady, his mind has well and truly shut down”"

Buffy stepped down the stairs, followed by Willow, the steps creaking under the heavy weight of their costumes, "“I'll give it you next time I get my allowance... you sure you're okay with me wearing this?”"

“"Well, I don't like it. I think you should have chosen something a little less gothic but its Halloween and at least you're wearing more then I did one year”"

"“Really? How much did you wear? Do tell?”" Buffy practically bounced on her feet at the prospect of some mother related gossip, a difficult feat in such heavy plastic faux-armour but one her slayer strength made look deceptively easy.

Joyce wasn't buying into it though, "“I think you've broken Xander enough, besides, don't you have a school to get to? Kids to lead around”"

“"Don't want to be late”" Willow pointed out.

“"Right..."” Buffy glanced at Xander, who was finally getting his mind back together, "“Xander?”"

“"Have me… I mean, yes?”"

She grinned wickedly, "“heel!”"

Xander's mind was already in a dirty place and the images that one word brought up was enough to send him well and truly over the edge.

“"Aw Buffy, you broke him again”"


Collecting their groups of children was relatively easy, given that for once Snyder gave them no trouble at all. They suspected it had something to do with their costumes and the swords and other weapons with came with them. It was perhaps a good thing for their sanity that they didn't know that Snyder's wet dreams were dressed a lot like Willow and Buffy were.

Giles unfortunately caught the expression on Snyder's face as the girls walked away and had to go have a swift drink... followed by a swift '‘intimidate the headmaster' session.

Meanwhile, elsewhere Ethan Rayne was casting a spell, summoning forth Janus to wreck chaos on the town.


He felt strange... almost human. He hadn't felt that way in a long time, not since the near mortal blow had confined him to his throne. Strange.

Stranger still, he appeared to be once more bound to a corporeal form and he was inside his ancient Terminator armour.

“"What kind of magic is this? How did I not sense it happening?"” the immortal Emperor of mankind asked, more then a little surprised and annoyed as he realised that for the first time in near twenty millennia, he was truly alive.

He couldn't be, he was humanities guardian, he needed to walk the path of the warp, of the immaterium to guide his mighty servants as they defended humanity from the alien, the demon and the pysker.

How had he been reduced to solid form once more? Not even the chaos powers had strength enough to manage that!

A scrabbling hit his augmented hearing and he glanced down, the gold and precious metals covering his armour glinting in the light from the street lights, the whining of the servos in his massive master-crafted terminator armour sounding faintly through the street, being drown out by creams and the wailing of sirens.

'Demon', was his first thought as he saw the form scratching at his armour, trying to break through. 'Child' was his second as his inner eye told him all was not as it seemed.

Converted by chaos magic… yet it was not the magic of Tzeentch, the Changer of ways, the chaos power most likely to be involved in an act such as this. In fact, the mark was not of any of the chaos powers, major or minor that he knew, and after so many years walking the stars and warp in his astral form, he knew almost all of the powers. But the magic... he could see a tie in it, a link to some distant object.

Maybe... if that object was destroyed, he might be able to change the being back to the innocent he was meant to be, and preservation of the innocent was a laudable goal, there were so few of them in the universe of the 41st millennia.

He kicked the monster away, the force of the servos and hydraulics in his armoured legs throwing the monster a full five hundred feet before it rolled to a stop, unconscious and bleeding, but the Emperor wasn't paying attention, his mind was already elsewhere.

Am I too a child changed by these magic's? Is there another soul whom this body truly belongs too?

He glanced within, and found Alexander Lavelle Harris.


“"In the name of the Emperor, won't you just die?" ” Stern shouted, her bolter slamming against her shoulder as round after round burst from the barrel, tearing through the miniature demons that had suddenly developed an urge to call home to their mummies...

“"Damn nurglings!" she muttered, slamming another clip home as the demons raced out of range, "always so damn small, always to damn nimble to hit cleanly”"

She glanced around, not recognising any of the buildings or the construction methods but that was not a surprise, the worlds of the Empire were many and varied and most seemed to have their own unique way of doing things. No, what she found surprising was no aquilas or alien totems anywhere, either defaced or in use. That meant... well, she wasn't sure what it meant. The worlds of the Empire displayed the aquila, the double headed eagle everywhere and whilst the presence of demons suggested a chaos controlled world, there were no signs of which chaos power controlled the region.

Worse still, she had no idea how she had arrived here or where the rest of her Battlesisters were.

Quickly mouthing the litany of activation, she turned her suit comm on, “"Seraphim Stern reporting”"

She waited a beat, then smiled as a voice broke from the radio, “"Battlesister Thorn, is the Prioress with you?”"

Stern frowned, her bolter spitting fire at a demon that was stupid enough to get to close, “"negative... I have no contact with the convent or any other of our Battlesisters”"

“"Emperor preserve us, the area is swarming with Demons and we are alone”"

“"We must do our duty"” Stern replied, piously, “"if the Emperor demands we die this day, then so be it”"


“"That... won't be necessary. I'm uploading a navigation marker to your suits; make best speed to my location immediately”"

Stern frowned, “"This is a restricted channel, identify yourself immediately or by the Emperors name I will kill you myself”"

A tired chuckle was the response to her words, then a pause, “"Battlebrother... Harris, Grey Knights”"

Stern slammed up straight, a Grey Knight, here?

She hesitated, but knew her duty. She would have to approach cautiously just in case he was not what he claimed to be, but if he was then she was his to Command. Grey Knights were an Elite Chapter even for the Space Marines, dedicated demon hunters and it was rumoured that the entire chapter was psychic.

“"In his name, I am coming”"

She flicked the transmitter off, nodding as she heard Thorn respond, and then began running towards the marker now displayed on her helmet.


“"You lied about who you were”" she said simply, amazed that she could do even that much. What she saw was impossible, yet her heart and mind were both shouting at her that the man she saw in front of her was truly her Lord, the Emperor.

“"If I had told you whom I truly was, would you have believed me?”"

"“No"” Stern replied, glancing bemused at the still kneeling Thorn, “"but then, I believe you have guided me before”"

"“I have guided you many times Seraphim; only rarely did I feel you needed the assurance of knowing I was there however”"

He sighed, “"Thorn, would you ever disobey an order from your Emperor?”"

“"No, my Lord, I would rather Die!”"

“"As you should, but right now I need you on overwatch”"

Thorn slammed up, the Servo's in her Power Armour whining for a moment as she went in the blink of an eye from kneeling, to overwatch, gun hold level as she began searching for any threats to her God.

The Emperor resisted the urge to roll his eyes, but with difficulty, “"I also need you both to listen”"

“"We are not meant to be here, these are not our bodies, we have merely been forced into these shells by a chaos mage”"

“"My Lord, we are going to kill this mage are we not?"” Thorn asked.

“"Of course, but first, I have a question for the two of you about a volunteer only mission”"

“"My Lord, you do not have to ask”" Stern replied.

“"Yes, I was almost afraid that would be your reply"” the Emperor glanced up, “"but for now... the young lady being chased by those demons has not been tainted, save her”"


A volley of bolter fire filled the air, and with a not-so muffled shriek Cordelia dived for cover, her mind frantically trying to cope with the fact that not only did Buffy and Willow apparently have guns and were using them, but that Dweeb boy did too.. and that scared her. If there was one person who should never be handed a gun, it was Xander. And where did that armour come from anyway?

“"Miss, you will come with us”" Cordelia glanced up at Willow, more then a little apprehensive. It was Willows body, Willows voice, but the tone, the expectation of being obeyed, the assurance and strength of will behind it was not Willow.

“"Thorn, if you have to, threaten her"” Buffy said, and Cordelia was suddenly afraid, that didn't sound like Buffy at all, that voice sounded like a soldier, “"but we must leave, we have a mission to accomplish”"

A small geyser of dirt sprang up as Willow, no Thorn fired a single round into the ground mere inches in front of her, "get up and stay with us. If you do not, we will abandon you to the hosts of chaos”"

Cordelia shivered, and swiftly got up.


Ethan groaned, shifting painful as he tried to rise to his feet, his body aching and pained. Something had gone wrong with the spell, something had cause far far more energy to be expended then he had expected and damn did it hurt. Not that the energy had come from him of course, that was the point of using Janus, he could and would provide the needed energy but he was the caster. That meant that some of the energy would pass through him, a mere small fraction compared to what would pass through the bust.

But that fraction had proven enough to flatten him, and it shouldn't have. Something had pulled more energy through the bust, forcing more energy to pass through him then he had prepared for.

That meant just one thing, and it could be summoned up in one word, trouble.

Unfortunately for Ethan, trouble was standing outside the door, swapping their Bolters for close combat weapons.


Xander came to slowly, his mind screaming and pained as he tried to force the memories of being the Emperor, of all that the Emperor had known and done, of the Emperor's betrayal and near death at the hands of his most trusted warlord to a distant corner of his mind.

He felt a shift within his mind, and his eyes snapped open, terrified as a voice within him said, “"Don't worry my child, I am with you”"

In front of him stood a massive suit of armour, empty with a helmet set to one side. It was painted white and embossed with gold and precious metals and blazed across the front was the Imperial Aquila, the two headed eagle standard of the Empire of mankind.

And unlike the suit he had bought, it was all so obviously real.

A distant part of Xander's mind wondered oh so briefly as Xander fell back into unconsciousness if Buffy and Willow were taking it any better.