Batboy swung across the balcony and landed on the other side of the building.
"Alright, Battiger!" He yelled. "Laughing Moron is usually surrounded by grinning maniacs, and a tall woman that's dressed like a jack!"
"Why are you telling me this?" Battiger asked, leaping over to where Batboy was.
"Because you've never seen the TV show." Batboy said.
"Ah." Battiger said.
"And," Batboy continued. "Laughing Moron, usually is equipped with laughing gas! So be sure to stay on your toes."
"If you think I'm taking on a demented clown with laughing gas, then you don't know my sense of survival well." Battiger said.
"Come on, Hobbes!" Batboy yelled. "Your not going to become a super hero, if your hiding half of the time!"
"That's just fine with me." Battiger said.
"No it's not!" Batboy spat. "Now are you going fight crime with me, or cower under the bed and look simple?"
"Oh, no you aren't!" Batboy snarled. "Now come on!"
Batboy leaned over the building.
"Laughing Moron is in that shack over there. Laughing, no doubt. Now come on! We have to secure the perimeter!"
Batboy leaped off of the building. Battiger sighed, and followed.
Joker was sitting in a tall chair, and was (of corse) Laughing his head off.
"Did you get it!" He grinned.
One of his men dropped a bag of jewels onto the desk.
Joker grabbed one and studied it.
Then he laughed again.
"At this rate, all Gotham's crystals shall be mine in no time!"
"SORRY LAUGHING MORON!" Boomed a voice. "BUT SOMETHING CITY DOESN'T WANT YOU DO WHAT YOU JUST SAID!"
Joker looked up. So did his two men and Harley.
Batboy dropped out of the shadows, and landed on the desk.
"Surrender, Laughing fiend!" Batboy declared. "You can not possibly defeat Batboy and Batt..."
He spun around.
Battiger wasn't there.
He spun back to Joker.
"Defeat Batboy and Batboy! Surrender!"
"Who's this imposter?" He laughed.
"I am Batboy!" Batboy announced. "Defeater of all evil and evil like things. The new form of bat super hero mutant things! The new form of humans who have bat DNA! And you can not possibly..."
"Get him." Joker yawned.
Batboy raised an eyebrow, and turned his head 90 degrees to the left.
His goons were stalking for him.
He whipped out his Transmogrifier gun, and aimed it at one of the gang members.
The member was instantly shrunk down to a mouse.
Then he turned it to the other goon.
He turned into a squirrel.
Batboy blew smoke off the top of his gun, the slipped it back into his pocket.
He turned back to Joker.
"Well, Laughing Moron, it's just you, me, and that weirdo over there dressed in red and black."
He spun around.
"Oh, good grief! I forgot about her!"
Harley made a dive for Batboy.
Batboy took one step to the left, and Harley crashed into Joker.
"Ah, heh heh heh." Batboy chuckled.
Then Battiger finally came into view.
He yawned, and flung a batrang at the ceiling.
It bounced off the ceiling, and zoomed out of the room.
"You missed!" Batboy yelled.
"No I didn't." Battiger said.
"Yeah you did!" Batboy yelled.
"No, I hit just what I wanted." Battiger said.
Joker got up from the ground, and started stalking for Batboy.
"You did miss!" Batboy insisted.
"Well, maybe it was off by three centimeters, but I still hit the area that I wanted, and Joker's about to strangle you."
"That's no excuse, and don't argue with me! The point is that you missed! And furthermore, what did you just say?"
"I said, Joker's about to choke you to death." Battiger said.
Batboy sighed, with Joker only three feet away.
"First off, Hobbes. He's called Laughing Moron, not Joker. Joker is an extremely stupid name, and doesn't compare to... well, my name for him."
Just then a light came on in his eyes.
"Oh. You said he's going to... OHHHHHHHHH!"
Batboy spun around and threw a punch at Joker.
Joker laughed and threw a gas bomb at Batboy.
Batboy leaped from the way, and started pelting Joker with toys he had in his pocket.
"DIE CLOWN GUY! DIE!"
Joker was hit by two pencils, three comic books, and a squirt gun.
He was able to dodge a toy truck though. That truck would've hurt.
Joker made another lunge for Batboy.
"Nighty Night, Kiddo!" He yelled throwing another gas bomb at Calvin.
The gas bomb went off, next to Calvin's feet.
"Nice try, you green haired, white faced, mouth breather!"
Calvin whipped a fan out of his pocket, don't ask me how he fit it in there, and started blowing the gas away.
Battiger, Joker, and Harley Quinn stared at Batboy in disbelief.
"He has everything in there except for the Kitchen sink." Battiger told Joker.
"Actually I have the kitchen sink in the third pocket to the left of the right glove by spike number two in category five in subcategory ten in subsubcategory thirteen in compartment six." Batboy said.
Battiger rolled his eyes.
"Where's the bathroom sink?" He asked.
"I stuffed it in bat ear number one." Batboy said.
Just then, Joker tossed a metal, wild card at Batboy.
It missed, but ripped his cape.
"HEY!" Batboy yelled, spinning around. "Now I have to sew that back before the next scene!"
Batboy held up his gloves.
The turned sharp, as if he were flexing claws.
"Prepare for your unwitting downfall, Laughing Moron!"
Batboy sent a handful of claws at Joker's face.
Joker laughed, and dodged.
"Battiger!" Batboy yelled. "Help!"
"Don't worry. My batrang hit the right spot." Battiger said.
"Your batrang did not hit the right spot!" Batboy screamed. "And do you know why? Because we were not aiming for the ceiling, you dunce!"
"I was." Battiger said.
"No you weren't!" Batboy said, tossing another toy truck at Joker. "And even if you did, it would prove what a moron you are!"
Joker laughed, and held a giant mallet over his head.
"HA HA!" He screamed.
Just then, a batrang flew into the room, and hit Joker in the head.
He dropped the mallet, and fainted.
"Right on time. one batrang around Gothom in three minutes."
Batboy stared at Battiger, trying to figure out what to say. He decided to say nothing.
"Alright, Hardly Quinn!" Batboy said, whirling around. "You will now face your inadvertent end!"
Batboy handcuffed Harley.
"Calling all units!" Batboy said into a microphone. "We have one demented moron here, who thinks he's a circus, and another whack who thinks she's a jack. requesting backup, over."
And with that, Batboy flew off.
"Who's next?" Battiger asked.
"Counter Clockwise guy." Batboy said.
"Who?" Battiger asked.
"Or as you amateurs say, The Clock King." Batboy said.
"Oh great. Somebody who thinks he's a clock. Just what I need." Battiger said.
Batboy and Battiger flew over the building in search of their new victim.
They soon came to the Clock King's secret hide out, as all evil masterminds have.
Can you guess what it was stuffed with?
Clocks. Hundreds of them. Thousands of them. Each one ticking.
"Gee, this guy's obsessed." Batboy said.
"That ticking's going to drive me insane!" Battiger mumbled
He grabbed a clock off the wall, and started shaking it, violently.
Well, it was no longer going "Tick tick, tick." Now it was going "tolk, tolk, tolk."
Battiger squeezed his eyes shut, and threw the clock onto the ground with a SMASH!
"That's it, Hobbes!" Batboy said. "We'll have to destroy every clock in this hideout!"
"That could take years." Battiger sighed.
"Not with my amazing inventions!"
Batboy held up his Time Pauser.
"We can do it all in a second!"
"You have got to be kidding me." Battiger said.
Batboy shrugged, and hit the button.
CRASH! SHINGLE! BOOM! KING! SMASH! WHAM! CSSSSSH!
Batboy grinned over at Battiger, who rolled his eyes.
"Now, to find Schedule Man! Ready?"
"It's Clock King." Battiger said.
"No need." Said a voice.
Batboy and Battiger spun around.
Um... correction. Batboy spun around. Battiger turned his head, and stared in the direction of the voice.
It was, of corse, the Clock King. Wearing his ridicules clock goggles, and that flawless brown suit.
"AH HA!" Batboy declared. "You have entered the hideout of Batboy and Battiger! Now you will suffer!"
"This is my hideout." Clock King said.
"Yeah, well nobody cares about the opinion of a clock!"
Batboy glanced at his watch.
"Good grief! It's already Five o'clock! Where does the Time go?"
"Dad usually gets to the house at five o'clock." Batboy said.
Battiger's eyes blanked out.
"The house is five o'clock?" He asked.
"No. The house is where he lives."
"Oh. I guess that fits but how..."
"The clock says five."
He glanced around. "where's the clock?"
"The clock is... it doesn't matter, Hobbes. Any clock would say it is five o'clock, because it is five o'clock."
"How does a clock know what time it is?" Battiger asked.
"That's what clocks do, Battiger. They tell time."
"What do they tell it?"
"They tell it that it's five o'clock!"
"But wouldn't time already know what time it is? Why would it need a clock?"
"It needs a clock because...are you trying to make this complicated? I made the simple statement that it's five o'clock. Do you believe that or not?"
"Well... What about yesterday? Wasn't it five o'clock yesterday?"
Batboy stuck his nose in Battiger's face.
"Hobbes! Sometimes I think you're trying to make a mockery of my life's work. And furthermore, We're out of time for your foolish questions!"
"Well, it's about time!"
"Exactly." Batboy said.
Batboy whirled around to Clock King.
"Now then! You will now face dire consequences! Any last words?"
Clock King tossed a pocket watch at Batboy.
Batboy caught it.
"What's this supposed to do?" He asked.
"I think it's a bomb." Battiger said.
Batboy turned a murderous glare on Battiger.
"Who's in charge around here?" He demanded.
"Exactly! I am! Thus, I'll make the startling revelations!"
Battiger rolled his eyes.
"And I can now point out that this clock is actually A BOMB!"
"Oh my gosh."
"Exactly!" Batboy said. "Now I shall tosseth the bomb away, capture Mr Clock, and everything will be hunky dory."
"Well, you better hurry before it explodes." Battiger said.
Batboy tossed the clock away.
It hit the floor, and exploded.
Batboy then turned his attention back to... Hmmm. Clock King had vanished.
"Stupid idiot." Batboy muttered. "He thinks he's a sneaky clock! Well he's gotta another think coming! Come on, Battiger, before he escapes!"
With a woosh of Batboy's cape, he vanished.
Battiger sighed, and followed.
Clock King was strolling towards one of those giant clock towers.
"HALT!" Batboy screamed. "Sorry schedule Guy! But your Family Reunion is canceled!"
It was then that Batboy realized that Battiger was staring at him.
"What?" He asked.
"Family Reunion?" He asked.
"Well, yeah." Batboy said. "He thinks he's a clock, and that's a clock tower and... don't you get it?"
Battiger gave Batboy a blank stare.
"Never mind. Let's get him!"
Batboy and Battiger zoomed in after What ever his name was.
"Prepare to be fried, Clock Guy!" Batboy called.
"This is about to much action for me." Battiger said. "I'll wait outside."