He Knows No Bounds in His Admiration
Disclaimer: YYH is not mine, nor do I profit from this.
A/N: The world needs more KxK.
Summary: Love is deaf, blind, and generally oblivious. Karasu doesn't know when to stop.
"Good morning, lovelies!" Karasu trilled as he sailed into the dining area of the hotel suite, his coattails streaming along behind him. He took a seat at the table and beamed at his teammates, who were already halfway through breakfast. Bui had just demolished a mountain of sausages and was moving on to the eggs already. Well, Karasu generally did take longer than his teammates to complete his toilette. "And how are we this fine morning?"
Toguro Otouto grunted. "Enough is enough, Karasu. We don't try to curb your psychotic tendencies, which can be desirable in a fighter--,"
"Ooh, desirable," Karasu smirked. "I know a young, red-headed boy who's desirable."
"But are unfortunately excessive in you," Toguro continued pointedly. "So, damn it, stop going all queer over Urameshi's youko. My brother and I have worked hard to maintain a badass image for the team which you are currently threatening to destabilize."
"Badass," Karasu mused gleefully, apparently oblivious to Toguro's words. "Kurama has a bad ass. It's baaaad . . . if you get my drift." He winked, just in case they hadn't.
Toguro Ani giggled shrilly. Bui actually thought he felt his fork vibrating with the tinny laughter as he brought a lump of scrambled eggs to his mouth. He set the fork down abruptly and shot a put-out look at Toguro Ani, who observed, "I'm afraid you'll have to concentrate your efforts on kicking little Minamino Shuiichi's bad ass if you intend to leave this island. Or just, you know, live."
He giggled again at his own joke. At the head of the table, Toguro Otouto huffed deeply as if to tell his brother that this was a serious issue and he was not helping matters.
Karasu's eyes lit up as he regarded Toguro Ani thoughtfully. "Actually, I'd rather like to sodomize that ass. Tenderize it to the consistency of ground pork. Just pound it, and grind it, and really tear into—."
Bui, who had once again brought his fork to his mouth, let it clatter to the tabletop. He calmly wondered if he was going to retch, then decided he would not.
"Shut up," Toguro Otouto interrupted in a tone that brooked no argument. "Nearly the whole time we've been here, it's been Kurama this, Shuiichi that. You've been acting like a lovesick schoolgirl, and I'm sick of it, you over-sexed homosexual rapist."
"Thank you," Karasu murmured blandly, smiling at no one in particular.
Toguro shot him a withering glare and went on. "You're here to fight, not fuck," Karasu's face fell, "and there isn't going to be another word out of you on that bloody kitsune. Understand?"
"You're going to kill him," Toguro Ani reminded him in a transparent attempt at a concerned, brotherly tone. "You'd kill him no matter what: you destroy both your enemies and those you love." Another high-pitched giggle ruined the effect he was trying for.
"I understand," Karasu said meekly to Toguro the Elder, wearing a thoroughly miserable expression. "I'm sorry."
"Well, that's all right then," Toguro replied sternly. "Just—just behave yourself. If you're good, we'll give you a cookie."
"And if you're bad, we'll hang you from your ankles with chains and whip you raw," Toguro Ani chimed in, grinning wickedly.
Karasu blinked slowly. "Chains and whipping could be fun. As long as Kurama were chained and I got to do the whipping. Oh, and if chocolate syrup was involved, too. Mmm." He licked his lips.
With one swift motion, Toguro Otouto lifted Karasu from his chair by wrapping a hand around his throat.
"You know," he said to his brother, "if we didn't absolutely need him to fight Team Urameshi, I'd snap his neck."
Toguro Ani nodded with impish delight. Karasu was steadily turning blue.
Toguro Otouto reached up with his other hand and tapped Karasu on the head. He was instantly knocked cold.
"That'll keep him quiet for a while," he muttered. He dropped Karasu gracelessly back onto the chair, where he slumped over and his hair fell over his face.
"It's rather cute, actually," Toguro Ani sniggered. "Our little Karasu, all grown up and ready to ravish."
"Ha. Ha," Toguro Otouto said dryly. "I feel exactly like a mother bird who's pushed her fledgling out of the nest."
Bui closed his lips on the forkful of egg he'd managed to convey successfully to his mouth and chewed placidly.
"Good egg," he said to no one in particular.
Without missing a beat, the Toguro brothers picked up their own forks and tucked in.
And visions of scantily clad Kuramas performing burlesque dances swam through Karasu's haze of unconsciousness. His lips curled into a sleepy grin.
You saucy fox, you.