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by Susan Friedman (pen name susan friedman)
"What a mess!" the Evil Queen commented, looking around. "It was always so wholesome looking, so clean. "There's going to be a lot of cleaning going on here, Mr. Charming and it's to start as soon as possible. My stepdaughter is unaccustomed to filth such as this. If my brother, Lord Farquaad hadn't left me this castle I would never have come here at all, if you and that mirror hadn't talked me into it."
She turned to look at Prince Charming who was sitting on a folding chair with his head in his hands and a sad look on his face. The talking mirror was propped up at his feet, looking equally as miserable. The Queen frowned. "What's up with you two?"
"I miss Fiona," the Prince said, sadly, staring off into the darkness. "I can't stop thinking about her."
"Yeah, well, you'd better get over it, my son. It's been a whole year."
"Not to mention that little Princess Charming, when she shows up will be the fairest one of all."
"QUIET!" The Prince and the Evil Queen directed their comments to the mirror. "Enough of this whose the fairest one of all crap.'"
"Just trying to help." The Mirror brightened. "After all, Snow is pregnant and we all know that it's a girl."
"Yes, yes, yes." The Evil Queen said. "Due any day, as a matter of fact." She turned back to the darkness of the castle.
"Well, let's get the show on the road, shall we?"
At the Fairy Forest Cabbage Patch Central Headquarters, two new arrivals were attracting a lot of attention and a good deal of talk.
All the storks were gathered around this latest addition, a beautiful baby boy by the name of Maxwell.
"Are you sure that this baby is supposed to go to those two ogres in the swamp?" One of the delivery storks was eyeing the birth certificate with a bit of skepticism. He looked up and gestured to the baby, who had just started to cry. "I mean, does he look anything like an ogre?"
"Well," his co-worker answered, "if you look very closely, especially that nose. And those eyes..."
"Quiet, you two. You are here make your deliveries and return as quickly as possible without question. Is this understood?"
"Yes, Captain." Both of the storks saluted.
"Good," the Captain said. "I would hate to see a black mark on the Fairy Forest Cabbage Patch Flying Feathers Stork Corps. We have performed with exceptional service to the fairy tale community in the past without one bit of trouble and I would appreciate it if we held to our great tradition.'
"Of course, Captain."
"Good, then it is settled. Both have been given the usual blessing and prophecy by our resident Forest Fairy and carries with it the usual warranty and guarantee of a true fairy tale life." The Captain looked at the two storks. "Now get moving, you're late." The one who was looking at the certificate was young and still retained his brown feathers. However, the other worker had his white feathers and had been with the Flying Feathers for two years now.
He pointed to the younger stork. "You are to make your delivery to Shrek and Fiona in the swamp." He turned to older stork. "And you will deliver this bundle of joy to the Charmings at Castle Duloc." He handed the white stork a basket. Inside, was a beautiful and happy baby girl. "Go, get out of here."
Shrek and Fiona had been waiting impatiently for their new bundle for a day and a half. It was quickly approaching evening and there was still no sign.
Fiona had been outside their little tree home watching the skies every ten minutes. This time she had been outside for nearly two hours.
She had been thinking about the events of last year before they rid her father of his frog spell given to him by the Fairy Godmother. Puss had persuaded Brenda the Good, to break the spell and return him to his human form. After a few months to make sure everything was alright, Shrek became homesick and, with a promise from Fiona to return every year, they left Far, Far Away for their little home in the swamp. It wasn't too long after their arrival that Fiona found herself expecting.
"Fiona," Shrek called, opening the door. "It's time for dinner."
"But the baby, Shrek. We are scheduled for delivery. Our little package should have arrived two days ago."
"And it will be here, Fiona. Now come in."
Fiona nodded and reluctantly headed indoors.