Author's Notes: Yes, everyone, it's back; the infamous The Cat in the Hat parody. For those of you who have gotten used to subliminal morals and lessons in my fanfics... throw that all out the window. We're returning back to the days of '03, when all that mattered was getting a few cheap laughs out of the audience.

Also, I must note that since this fanfic was edited from a script-form story and is a parody of what is basically a long poem, some of the dialogue maybe formatted strangely in order to stay somewhat close to the structure of the original book. Basically, you might have to think a bit to recall who is talking. The original words are in quotes and italics, in poem form, and statements such as "So-and-so said..." in parentheses are generally Metal, acting as the narrator. Of course, things have changed from the original...

Well! It's been a blast rewriting and editing the old parody, and I hope you enjoy it! And hopefully, by the time you get to the "moral" at the end, you'll have figured it out. (sweatdrop)

Oh, for those of you who read the original, there's a brief recap at the beginning. If you haven't read the original and enjoy surprises, you might want to skip over it.

Enjoy!

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A dark stage loomed over the audience, silent and forbidding in its appearance. Suddenly, a spotlight clicked on, illuminating the wooden boards that ran the length of the stage floor. Two shadowy figures shuffled out into the light... One was a black-and-red hedgehog, and the other a blue hedgehog-robot. The robot sighed, while the hedgehog grinned quite cheesily.

"My name is Metal," the robot said flatly. "Metal Sonic."

"And I'm Shadow the Hedgehog!" the hedgehog chimed in.

Metal continued, "And we are here to bring you a remake of a certain parody that we hope you will enjoy very much..."

"But first, we will give tribute to the original!" Shadow added. "In rhyme!"

"Ugh..." Metal rolled his eyes, but held up a sheet of paper nonetheless. The two proceeded to read the rhyme, alternating verses...

The robot started. "It was a time long ago

"In a place far away

"When the Hedgehog in the Hat

"Came over to play."

Shadow grinned. "He had bright blue sharp spikes

"And a red-and-white hat

"So, he was a parody

"Of Dr. Seuss' Cat!"

"He played many bad tricks

"And threw our 'fish' in the air

"We did all we could to

"Get him out of there..."

"Then our mother showed up

"(Amy Rose was her name)

"And the Hedgehog ran off

"To fanfiction fame!"

"But that was in script,

"Which we had to remove

"So now the Author and we

"Are going to prove..."

"That paragraph form is

"Quite funny, you see

"And so we bring to you

"This parody!" Shadow finished by waving his arms around like a maniac.

Metal glared at him. "Don't do that."

"Right!" Shadow gave him a thumbs-up.

"... don't do that either," Metal sweatdropped. Turning to the audience, he put on a fake smile and said, "And now, we bring to you...

"'The Return of the Hedgehog in the Hat'!"

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The Hedgehog in the Hat

(A Parody of Dr. Seuss' "The Cat in the Hat")

(Please read the original source material first!)

(Or else traumatic events may occur!)

(... we warned you.)

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The scene opens on a small house, sitting on a hill, in the midst of a rainy, bleary day. Inside the house, Metal and Shadow sit on small kiddy chairs, feeling slightly depressed by the bad weather and lack of television.

Metal sighed and began to speak aloud. "The sun did not shine

"It was too wet to play

"So we sat in the house

"All that cold, cold, wet day."

Tilting his head to one side, Shadow thought (gasp!). "Hey, Metal..." he said, "aren't you a robot? Robots can't feel hot or cold. How do you know if it's cold today?"

With a slight twitch of annoyance, Metal glared at Shadow. "Well, it's raining, so regardless of the temperature I wouldn't be able to go outside anyway. Eggman's such a cheapskate, he didn't give me any rust-resistant materials."

The black-and-red hedgehog sighed. "Yeah, you're right..."

Metal rolled his eyes, then continued. "I sat there with Sally-"

However, he was interrupted by a loud screech of disapproval. "What?" Shadow shrieked. "I am not 'Sally'! I am..." he struck a heroic pose, "the Ultimate Life Form! So don't forget it!" he growled angrily.

The robot sweatdropped at his slightly egotistical acquaintance. "Er... 'I sat there with Shadow,

"We sat there, we two.

"And I said, 'How I wish

"We had something to do!' "

Happily, Shadow grinned. "That's better!"

Metal, had he one, would have raised an eyebrow. "Here I am," he muttered, noting to himself, "trapped in a tiny house, sitting on a tiny chair, right next to the king of all mood swings..."

"That I am!" the hedgehog shook a fist in the air.

"Too wet to go out

"And too cold to play ball.

"So we sat in the house.

"We did nothing at all."

"Um... we're talking, aren't we?" Shadow pointed out. "That's doing something. And we're moving! And breathing! And our hearts are beating! Well, I guess mine is..." he trailed off.

"Not anymore!" Metal jumped up and tackled Shadow, pinning him to the ground and about to Black Shield him into the next life, when Shadow put on the most incredible set of puppy-dog eyes you could imagine...

"But you're my most favorite person in the world...!" Shadow whined in a baby voice.

"Ugh..." Metal muttered, letting Shadow up and going back to his previous spot on the chair. Shadow grinned and did a victory sign.

"Mortals are so easily manipulated!"

The robot rolled his eyes. "So all we could do was to

"Sit!

"Sit!

"Sit!

"Sit!

"And we did not like it.

"Not one little bit."

Suddenly, Shadow jumped up. Metal glanced over, a bit startled. "What now?" the robot asked, although he wasn't really wanting an answer...

"I can't sit! I have to use the bathroom!" Shadow yelped out before dashing down the hallway. Meanwhile, Metal sighed, shaking his head and putting his face into his hands, quite thankful that robots do not possess bladders, and wondered when this whole ordeal would be done...

A few minutes later... Flusshh!

"Okay, I'm back!" Shadow said. "And I washed my hands!"

"That's nice," Metal said dryly.

"And then

"Something went BUMP!

"How that bump made us jump!"

"BUMP!" came the aforementioned noise.

"Aahh!" Shadow yelped, startled, before promptly jumping exactly twenty-five feet into the air. His quills, well-conditioned from years of Homing Attacks, crashed through the ceiling, but unfortunately...

Metal looked upward. "Hey, Shadow? Do you plan on coming down anytime soon?"

"I can't! I'm stuck!" Shadow yelled back, for the long spikes in the back of his head had effectively trapped him, much like when when you attempt to take the last pickle out of the jar, yet your hand, full of pickle, becomes stuck...

Interestedly, Metal continued on. 'Maybe now, things will be a bit quieter...' he thought to himself, while saying, "We looked..."

"Wait!" Shadow yelled. "I can't see anything! How can I 'look' if I can't see anything?"

"Argh!" Metal shouted, frustrated. Finally, he pulled on Shadow's feet, dragging the poor hedgehog down from the ceiling and plopping him back into the kiddy chair. "We looked!

"Then we saw him step in on the mat!

"We looked!

"And we saw him!

"The Hedgehog in the Hat!"

Instantly, one of the walls of the room exploded into a shower of plaster and wood, and standing there was Sonic, with a red-and-white striped hat on his head to match his shoes. "Hey guys!" he said in a very Engrish manner, before doing a double-take at the ceiling. "What the heck did you do?"

Metal stood up and brushed himself off. "And he said to us..."

"Ooh! I know!" Shadow said eagerly, raising his hand like a giddy schoolchild. "He asked us what the heck did we do?" Both Sonic and Metal stared at Shadow dumbly, wondering how on Earth (or on ARK, for that matter) their friend had become so out-of-character. Shadow tilted his head in confusion again. "Did I say something wrong?"

Metal shook his head, wondering how he ever got into this mess. "And he said to us,"

"Why do you sit there like that?" Sonic finished.

"Because... I poured Superglue on my chair," Shadow grinned.

It was Metal's turn for a double-take. "What!"

"Yeah... and it only comes off with nail-polish remover," Shadow sighed. "At first, it was all squishy and stuff, but now..."

"I don't want to hear it," Sonic said quite firmly.

"What do we do now?" Metal asked his rival. "I mean, he's stuck to his chair..."

"Yes, but... the show must go on!" Sonic yelled. Metal shook his head.

"I know it is wet

"And the sun is not sunny.

"But we can have

"Lots of good fun that is funny!" the "Hedgehog in the Hat" said triumphantly.

"You know what's funny? How you look in that hat," Shadow said, pointing at Sonic's hat. Sonic glared back at the black hedgehog.

The blue blur coughed, then continued, "I know some good games we could play,"

"Said the hedgie," Metal finished.

"I know some new tricks,"

"Said the hedgie... with a wedgie!" Metal and Shadow burst out laughing at their less-than-mature rhyme, while Sonic fumed at them.

"Now, exactly how can I have a 'wedgie'," Sonic did the 'quote-fingers', "when I don't even have any pants?" Sonic shouted. "It's not funny!"

"Yes. It is," Shadow said matter-of-factly.

Sonic rolled his eyes, then continued. "A lot of good tricks.

"I will show them to you.

"Your mother

"Will not mind at all if I do."

Promptly, Metal and Shadow's eyes bugged out. "Our what?" Shadow shrieked. "We don't have a mother! We don't have parents!"

"He's right!" Metal pointed out. "I'm a robot, and Shadow was created on the Space Colony ARK by renowned scientist Professor Gerald Robotnik..."

"You know, you don't have to go into the details," Shadow said flatly.

Metal pointed at Sonic. "The closest thing I've got to parental units is Eggman (him being my creator and all) and you, Sonic!"

Sonic face faulted. "What!"

"Doesn't the whole 'steal Sonic's life data to transplant into a robot' thing sound familiar?"

Shadow looked back and forth between Metal and Sonic. "Yeah, I see the resemblance..." Both the blue hedgehog and the robot glared at Shadow. "Heehee!" Shadow started laughing. " 'Are You My Mother?' "

"That's a different book! Now hurry up!" Sonic shouted at Metal, shoving the script into the robot's face. "This hat weighs a ton!"

"Then Shadow and I

"Did not know what to say.

"Our mother... um... Our mother was nonexistent

"Anyway...

"But our fish..."

"That's me!" came a very familiar, very annoying voice...

"Omochao!" everyone present shouted, quite afraid. "You're the fish?"

"Of course not!" Omochao said, irritated. "How many times must I say it? I'm Omochao! I'm here to help..."

"Yeah, yeah, please hurry up, Metal," Sonic said, pleading, while covering Omochao's mouth with his hands.

"But Omochao said,"

"No! No!

"Make that hedgie go away!

"Tell that hedgie in the hat

"You do NOT want to play!" Omochao cried.

"He should not be here

"He should not be about.

"He should not be here

"While your mother is out!"

"What mother?" Shadow pointed out. "You know something? That's an empty threat. I don't have to listen to you," the hedgehog folded his arms. Everyone sighed.

Sonic continued. "Now! Now! Have no fear.

"Have no fear!"

"Said he who's not a cat," said Metal.

"My tricks are not bad,"

"Said the hedgie in the hat."

"Why, we can have

"Lots of good fun, and right now,

"With a game that I call

"UP-UP-UP with Omochao!" Sonic grinned.

"Put me down!" ("said Omochao")

"This is no fun at all!

"Put me down!" ("said Omochao")

"I do NOT wish to fall!"

"Hey, I'm on your side!" Omochao said, wriggling from side to side as Sonic continued to restrain the robot.

"Or is he?" Shadow mused aloud.

"Have no fear!" ("said the hedgie")

"I will not let you fall.

"I will hold you up high

"As I stand on a ball.

"With a book in one hand!

"And I HAVE NO WEDGIE!

"But that is not ALL I can do!" ("said the hedgie...")

"Look at me!

"Look at me now!" ("said the hedgie.")

"With a cup and a cake

"On the top of my hat!

"I can hold up TWO books!

"I can hold up Omochao!

"And a little toy ship!

"And some milk... uh... from a cow!

"And look!

"I can hop up and down on the ball!

"But that is not all!

"Oh, no.

"That is not all...

"Look at me!

"Look at me!

"Look at me NOW!"

"I'm sensing a need for attention, Sonic..." Shadow said plainly.

"Can it, Shadow," Sonic muttered. "It is fun to have fun

"But you have to know how.

"I can hold up the cup

"And the milk and the cake!

"I can hold up these books!

"And Omochao on a rake!

"I can hold the toy ship

"And a small toy Eggman!

"And look! With my tail

"I can hold a red fan!"

"You barely have a tail," Metal said.

"Will you stop pointing out the deficiencies in this poem?" Sonic sweatdropped as he balanced on the ball. "It's not my fault that this is how it's written! It's a classic! What do you expect me to do about it?" Angrily, he continued, "I can fan with the fan

"As I hop on the ball!

"But that is not all.

"Oh, no.

"That is not all..."

"Why do you keep repeating yourself?" Shadow shouted. "It's very annoying!"

Sonic grinned mischievously. "That is not all! I repeat! That is not all!"

"Aargh!" Shadow yelled, frustrated. In his blind anger, he kicked the ball that Sonic was standing upon...

Metal watched interestedly. "That is what the hedgehog said...

"Then he fell on his head!

"He came down with a bump

"From up there on the ball.

"And Shadow and I,

"We saw ALL the things fall!

"And Omochao came down, too.

"He fell into a pot!

"He said"

"Do I like this?" Omochao ranted,

"Oh, no! I do not!

"This is not a good game,"

"Said Omochao as he... lit?" Metal glanced at the line. "Interesting choice of words there..."

"No, I do not like it,

"Not one little bit!" yelled Omochao.

"Now look what you did!"

("Said Omochao to the hedgie.")

"Now look at this house!

"Look at this! You've got a wedgie!" Omochao pointed, before falling to the ground with laughter.

"I... do... not!" Sonic hissed.

"You sank our toy ship,

"Sank it deep in the cake.

"You shook up our house

"And you bent our new rake.

"You SHOULD NOT be here

"When our mother is not.

"You get out of this house!"

"Said Omochao in the pot," Metal finished. "And for the last time! We don't have a mother!"

But Sonic merely put on a pouty face. "But I like to be here.

"Oh, I like it a lot!"

Metal sighed, "Said the Hedgehog in the Hat

"To the Omochao in the pot."

"I will NOT go away.

"I do NOT wish to go!

"And so,"

("Said the Hedgehog...")

"So

"so

"so...

"I will show you

"Another good game that I know!" Sonic grinned.

"Oh no..." Shadow hung his head sadly.

"And then he ran out.

"And, then, fast as a fox..." Metal found himself interrupted by several loud shouts...

"I resent that!" Sonic yelled.

Another voice chimed in, slightly muffled; "Are you saying that I'm slow?"

"Slower than me!"

"Maybe at running... but mentally, I'm the fastest thing alive!"

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah!"

"Guys, hush!" Metal shouted. "And, then, FASTER than the fox,

"The Hedgehog in the Hat

"Came back in with a box.

"A big red wood box.

"It was shut with a hook."

"Now look at this trick," ("said the hedgehog.")

"Take a look!"

"Then he got up on top

"Of the box, like a frog..."

"I call this game FUN-IN-A-BOX," ("said the hedgehog.")

"In this box are two things

"I will show to you now.

"You will like these two things,"

("Said the hedgehog with a bow.")

Sonic performed said bow. "I will pick up the hook.

"You will see something new.

"Two things. And I call them

"Tail One and Tail Two.

"These Tails will not bite you.

"They want to have fun."

Metal blinked at the script. "Then, out of the box

"Came... Tails... er... Tail Two and Tail One!

"And they... Tails... he... yeah... ran to us fast.

"Tails said,"

"How do you do?

"Would you like to shake... tails...

"With Tail One and Tail Two?"

Shadow sweatdropped at Tails. "How embarrassing..." For Tails' tails were marked with signs, "Tail One" and "Tail Two."

Metal scratched his head. "I can't shake tails... I don't have one."

Tails' ears drooped in humiliation. "Please... let's move on..."

"And Shadow and I

"Did not know what to do.

"So we had to shake tails

"With Tail One and Tail Two." Metal shrugged. "I've got a rocket booster... will that work?"

"I... do not... care," Tails hissed. "Please... move on..."

Metal shrugged again. "We (sort of) shook their two... tails...

"But Omochao said"

"No! No!

"Those Tails should not be

"In this house! Make them go!

"They should not be here

"When your mother is not!

"Put them out! Put them out!" Omochao said firmly, arms folded.

"Your 'mother'?" Tails blinked in confusion. "I thought you guys..." the fox was interrupted by a cloud of doom that suddenly appeared over Shadow's head. "... um... okay... And," he continued, "what do you mean by 'put them out'?"

Shadow suddenly grinned ("Another sudden shift of emotions... dear me, he seems unstable," Metal noted) and pulled out the flamethrower from the as-of-now unreleased video game, 'Shadow the Hedgehog.' ("Hero or Villain? You decide!" the title character said proudly. "Winter 2005! Don't miss it!")

Tails gawked at the ultimate life form. "Shadow... don't you dare..." he muttered, backing away slowly.

Sonic ignored the rather off-track conversation and continued. "Have no fear, little Omochao,"

("Said the Hedgehog in the Hat.")

"These Tails are good Tails,"

("And he gave them a pat.")

Tails twitched. Sonic raised an eyebrow, then stepped away. "Sorry, little buddy..."

"You'd better be..."

"They are tame. Oh, so tame!

"They have come here to play.

"They will give you some fun

"On this wet, wet, wet day." Sonic said.

"Now, here is a game that they like,"

("Said the hedgie who's not a cat.")

"They like to fly kites,"

("Said the Hedgehog in the Hat.")

"No! Not in the house!"

("Said Omochao in the pot.")

"They should not fly kites

"In a house! They should not.

"Oh, the things they will bump!

"Oh, the things they will hit!

"Oh, I do not like it!

"Not one little bit!"

Tails, however, ignored the little robot's complaining, and proceeded to run about the house with two kites tied to his tails, regardless of how embarrassing it was...

Metal said, "Then Shadow and I

"Saw them run down the hall.

"We saw those two Tails

"Bump their kites on the wall!

"Bump! Thump! Thump! Bump!

"Down the wall in the hall.

"Tail Two and Tail One!

"They ran up! They ran down!

"On the string of one kite

"We saw Mother's new gown!

"Her gown with the dots that are pink, white and red.

"Then we saw one kite bump

"On the head of her bed!

"Then those Tails ran about

"With big bumps, jumps and kicks

"And with hops and big thumps

"And all kinds of bad tricks.

"And I said,

" 'I do NOT like the way they play!

" 'If my nonexistent Mother could see this,

" 'Oh, what would she say!' "

Tails paused. " 'Nonexistent'?"

Metal shrugged. "Well, it's true. 'Then Omochao said,"

"Look! Look!"

("And our Omochao shook with fear.")

"Your mother is on her way home!

"Do you hear?

"Oh, what will she do to us?

"What will she say?

"Oh, she will not like it

"To find us this way!

"So, DO something! Fast!" ("said Omochao.")

"Do you hear?

"I saw her. Your mother!

"Your mother is near!

"So, as fast as you can,

"Think of something to do!

"You will have to get rid of

"Tail One and Tail Two!"

Suddenly, Shadow grabbed Omochao and shook him roughly. "You actually saw my mother? What does she look like? Do I look like her? I actually have a mother!"

Frustrated, Metal whacked Shadow over the head. "No, stupid! He's just following the story! I don't have a mother, you don't have a mother, so get over it!"

Shocked and deeply saddened, Shadow stepped backward. "Wh... what...?" he whispered, tears starting to well up in his eyes...

Metal sighed. "Hey, buddy, this is a humor story. We're supposed to make the readers laugh, not cry their hearts out..." But this did nothing to alleviate Shadow's latest mood swing. Finally, Metal rolled his eyes. "Fine. You need a shoulder to cry on? Right..." the robot sweatdropped to see Shadow already leaning on him for support while he cried, "... here."

Meanwhile, Tails was a bit alarmed about the "get rid of" line. "You... you're not really going to get rid of my tails, are you?"

Sonic smirked jokingly. "Yeah. We're going to cut them off." He sniggered and made a 'scissors' motion in the air with his fingers. "Snip."

However, Tails is not a person to catch sarcasm. "Aahh!" he shrieked. "You can't be serious! It's bad enough having two tails, but none? You wouldn't be able to call me 'Tails' anymore! You'd have to call me... Miles!" he shouted hysterically.

Sonic blinked. "Calm down, I was joking. No one's cutting off your tails."

Tails glared at Sonic. "That wasn't very nice..." Sonic sweatdropped.

Metal glanced at Shadow, then at a nearby clock, wondering exactly how long the Ultimate Life was capable of crying. He sighed, then said, "So, as fast as I could,

"I went after my net.

"And I said, 'With my net

" 'I can get them I bet.

" 'I bet, with my net,

" 'I can get those Tails yet!'

"Then I let down my net.

"It came down with a PLOP!

"And I had them! At last!

"Those two Tails had to stop."

"Sh... Shadow?" Metal said, gently tapping the hedgehog on the back. "I... I gotta go catch Tails now... are you going to be all right...?"

Shadow sniffled. "I... I guess..."

Metal breathed out in relief. "That's good."

But the worst wasn't over yet. Much to Metal's shock and embarrassment, Shadow reached out for the robot (with his behind still glued to his chair), hugged him, and shouted, "I love you big brother!"

Metal twitched, then pushed Shadow away. "Will you be quiet! And I'm not your brother!" Without a moment's hesitation, Metal dashed away, grabbed a large butterfly net, and smacked it down over Tails.

Completely tangled in the net, Tails tried his hardest to claw his way out. "Augh! I'm trapped! Sonic!" he yelled for help.

Quite red in the face, Metal pointed at Sonic and shouted, "Then I said to the hedgie,

" 'Now you do as I say.

" 'You pack up those Tails

" 'And you take them away!' "

Sonic shook his head sadly. "Oh dear!" ("said the hedgie.")

"You did not like our game...

"Oh dear.

"What a shame!

"What a shame!

"What a shaaame!"

"Stop repeating yourself!" Shadow yelled, apparently recovered from his earlier breakdown.

"Then he shut up those Tails

"In the box with the hook," Metal said.

"Bye everyone!" Tails waved.

"And the hedgie went away

"With a sad kind of look."

"That is good," ("said Omochao.")

"He has gone away. Yes.

"But your mother will come.

"She will find this big mess!

"And this mess is so big

"And so deep and so tall,

"We can not pick it up.

"There is no way at all!"

Glancing at said mess, Metal folded his arms. "I could blast it with missiles or something..." he started, but trailed off when he noticed everyone staring oddly at him. "... what?"

"And THEN!

"Who was back in the house?

"Why, the hedgie!"

"Have no fear of this mess," ("Said the Hedgie with no Wedgie.")

Sonic glared at Metal. "I told you, that's not funny! Anyway... 'I always pick up all my playthings

"And so...

"I will show you another

"Good trick that I know!"

Shadow folded his arms again. "Don't you think you've helped enough?"

Eager for the end, Metal said, "Then we saw him pick up

"All the things that were down.

"He picked up the cake,

"And the rake, and the gown,

"And the milk, and the strings,

"And the books, and the milk's from a cow!

"And the fan, and the cup,

"And the ship, and Omochao.

"And he put them away.

"Then he said,"

"That is that." Sonic nodded.

"And then he was gone

"With a tip of his hat.

"Then our mother... came in?" Metal looked up in surprise.

Much to everyone's surprise, Amy walked in the door! "Hey guys!" she said, emulating her favorite hedgehog.

But Shadow and Metal merely gaped, finally managing to sputter out, "You're our mother?"

"What? No, I'm just pretending for right now!" Amy sweatdropped.

"Phew..." Metal muttered.

"Darn!" Shadow snapped his fingers and frowned. Metal sweatdropped.

"You've gotta be kidding."

Shaking his head, the robot continued. "Then our 'mother' came in

"And she said to us two,"

Amy giggled at the rhymes, "Did you have any fun?

"Tell me. What did you do?"

"And Shadow and I did not know

"What to say.

"Should we tell her

"The things that went on there that day?

"Should we tell her about it?

"Now, what SHOULD we do?

"Well...

"What would YOU do

"If your mother asked you?"

.

.

.

"The End!" Metal proudly proclaimed.

"Whew..." Sonic whistled, pulling the hat off his head. "Jeez, that thing's heavy..."

"Aww, does Sonic have a booboo?" Amy said sweetly. "Let me kiss it and make it all better!"

"Wh... whaa? No!" Sonic yelped, running back out through the hole in the wall he made at the beginning.

"I don't think so!" Amy shouted, pulling out a jet pack and following him at top speed.

Metal watched Sonic and Amy disappear into the horizon. "Somehow, I don't think he'll ever be able to get away from her..."

Meanwhile, Shadow was attempting to stand up... and failing. Metal blinked. "What's wrong with you?"

Shadow laughed sheepishly. "Hehe..."

Flatly, Metal remarked, "You're still Superglued to your chair, huh."

Tails sweatdropped. "Shadow's Superglued to his chair?"

"You don't have to repeat it," Metal said. "Tails... go get a giant vat of nail-polish remover."

"Uh... sure," Tails said before running off.

"So, Shadow... just you and me left," Metal said as the two stood in the three-walled room.

"Um..." Shadow tried to stand up again, but the chair persisted in sticking to his bottom. "... yeah."

Metal twitched for the last time. "I'm outta' here." Activating his rocket boosters, the robot flew out through the open wall.

That left Shadow, still stuck in the house. "Um... hello? Anybody out there?" he called. Thankfully, Tails showed up at just that moment!

"Here you go, Shadow!" Tails said, smiling. "I'm sure you can... unglue yourself, right?"

"Yeah, okay!" Shadow grinned. "Thanks, Tails!"

"No problem!" Tails responded before also leaving.

Shadow reached out for the nail-polish remover... and found it to be exactly three inches too far away from his hand. He sweatdropped. "Uh... can someone help me?" But all that replied was an echo of his own voice. "Uhh... guys? Help me? Help me...!"

.

.

.

The scene changes back to the stage. Metal and Shadow shuffle out into the light again, ready for the closer...

Metal cleared his throat, then recited: "And so, through our fanfic

"We hope that you can see

"That Dr. Seuss doesn't mix

"With Sonic and company."

Shadow added, "The lesson we learned

"Is nothing at all

"Except that you should not

"Blast a hole in the wall!"

Metal blinked. "Shadow...?"

"Yeah?"

"... what was that?"

Shadow grinned. "That's all folks!"

"Shadow! Wait! What are you saying-"

.

.

.

The End!