A Second Chance


Hello, my name is Ruthie Camden, I am 15 years old and I am a sophomore. I always loved Martin Brewer, but I don't think he really loved me. We dated once for a week, just to get back at my ex-boyfriend. However, now, I am falling for him, not as a friend, more, like a boyfriend, and a person I would like to date. Sometimes, I think I am dreaming, he is like my brother, I used to live with, and no he's not. I know he's not my brother, but yet it seems like he is. I have known him for a while, I have falling for him for a long time and now I do not know how I can explain this to him. I love him, I hated him, and I like him. Now, I am older, more mature, and well not more mature. I see the more I fall for boys the less and less mature I get. I most likely act immature, I do not know, it is strange when you look at it. I am in love, deeply in love. Um, I do not know, I do not know, I no longer know what I should do, baffling through my feelings form one extent to the next. I want to tell him, but I also do not. I do not want to loose him as a friend, and yet I want to date him before I loose my chance. God, why did you make life so hard?

Hi, my name is Martin Brewer, my dad is a marine and my mom had died a couple years ago from cancer. I really miss her; I wish I had a sibling of some sort. I want to tell you that I am in love, in love with a girl I thought I would never have loved in my life. I love her so much, it drives me insane. Ruthie Camden, Ruthie Camden, Ruthie Camden, gosh, I cannot get that name out of my head. Each time I daydream, loose contact of any sort, my mind goes wondering about Ruthie. I know she does not love me or even like me. I remember last year she told me she would never date me or like me because I am just like her brother. Right now, I wish I were not her brother; I really want a chance with her. Last year she told me she only went out with me was because she wanted to get back at Vincent for dumping her, and yet I loved that she hated him. Now, I really hate him, I hate him for loving her. I hate him for being with her; I just hate everything about him. I know I am crazy, but this is life, life I have to face alone next year. Ruthie, that name is so beautiful. I love her; my dear heart cannot go on with out her. I told my self many times that she does not like me, and yet, my heart fights against that. I do not know why, but it just does. I really need to find a new girl, a girl I know that will like me back.

Okay, here is my plan, I am going to go and tell Martin today, I have to, he has the right to know, and I have to tell him. Today after school, when he is driving me home.

As I walk to my locker, I see my friend Shannon, I go up to her and talk to her. "Shannon I can't do this, I know I cant. I can't, I can't" I told her putting my head in my hands. "Ruthie, yes you can, you can do it. Be brave Ruth, be brave." She told me. "Who-what if I can't, what if I can't. I do not think I have enough courage to do this. I know I cannot. He is my brother for god sakes, okay maybe not, but still same thing. "

I got into the car with Martin; I smiled awkwardly knowing I have to get it over.

I see Ruthie, she is acting odd, and I know it. I smile at her. "Martin, Martin, I have to tell you something." She told me and I smiled and looked at her. "Okay here goes nothing." I said under my breath. "I know we've know each other for a while now, we're like brother and sister. However, we really are not brother and sister. That is not my point though, Martin, I want to tell you, I always wanted to tell you, and yet each time I try I cannot let it out. Martin, what I am trying to say is that I like you. I know you may think I am stupid, but I understand. It is just, the more I get to know you, the more I love you. The more I hang out with you, the more I fall. The more and more I spend with you the more I fall for you, Martin brewer." I smile, and hug her.

I smile again." Ruthie does not be sad, I like you, and I like you a lot. I know we were just friends at first, but I fell in love with you too Ruthie. Not fast, it took time, but I fell for you. You are the one my heart wants. All I do all day is think about you, if I am not reading, listing to music, something my mind is on you, for some odd reason. I just thought it was for some other reason, but now I see it, and my heart wants you in my life. I know, its weird that we lived in the same house, but we dated before, well, that was just to get back at your ex-boyfriend, but we still dated,"

I was happy, and then I went in for a kiss, I kissed her, it felt good. It felt like no other kiss before. This kiss was deep, and had feeling, I loved it.

When Martin kissed me, I loved it, I liked it so much. It was the best I ever felt. I have never kissed or have been kissed by a person like this before. It feels different, but in a good way. When he kissed me, I swear I could see fire works, heaven, angels and everything else. I do not know, I am really, deeply in love, and there not doubt about that. Thanks for having me be with Martin, god, thanks, god, thanks.

"Hey you two, how was your day?" Annie asked. "It was great, wonderful." Ruthie said while grabbing a cookie off the counter. "That's good, how was yours Martin?" She asked. "It was great, the best day I have ever had for a long time. Annie smiled awkwardly. "Mom, I'm going up stairs bye." "Yeah, I'm going to go too."

Next chapter is Called "Secrets Spills," or "Living a Lie." That chapter is going to be about how people find out about their little relationship, but they do not like how they lied about dating.

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