Disclaimer: I own nothing. CSI belongs to Jerry Bruckheimer and Alliance Atlantic.

Spoilers: Grave Dangers 1&2. If you haven't seen that eppy then you might not want to read this. But it's your choice.

Archive: Ask first please.

Rating: K

I never once thought about what it would be like without Nick. It always was apparent that he was going to be here for a while. Nothing ever happened with him. He was model CSI; a big jump from Warrick who played by his own rules.

I loved him once. 'Once' being the key word. He was always there when I was down. He picked me up piece by piece. What a burden to have on your shoulders but he made it. Made it through bad times-we had plenty-and good times-the rarer kind.

When I watched him in that box I automatically thought, oh lord he's gonna die. If he would have pulled that trigger there would be no more good times; just bad times and one emotionally crashed CSI team. I knew he was a fighter though.

Would I have fought as hard as I did if Warrick was in that box? Probably. If Nicky had won the coin toss that started this all Warrick would have been buried alive. I asked him what he would have done and he said, 'I would have pulled the trigger.' I knew he would. Warrick was weak, but he was stronger than me.

Nick-the poor guy-narrowly escaped being paralyzed and he beat death. What a fighter. He would never be the same and that has become more apparent lately. He snaps at everybody, if a bug goes near him he's in hysterics, and if a light is suddenly switched on in his presence he almost shoots it.

What will become of you Nicky?