Buffy the Vampire Slayer

In A Fan Fiction Crossover with


Crypt Forty-Seven


S. T. Farnham

Disclaimer: Most of this stuff was created by and is owned by J. J. Abrams or Joss Whedon and their respective production companies. ABC, UPN, WB, and the incompetents who run Fox also claim certain specific rights to some of the works of Abrams and Whedon. I claim only the broad constitutionally protected right of parody and Fair Use.

Spoilers: If you're reasonably familiar with both series, I doubt you'll be spoiled by anything here.

Rating: T (PG-13)

Summary: What if Sloane found out about a Rambaldi artifact located in Sunnydale, and sent Sydney and Dixon to retrieve it?

Author's Notes: This takes place during Season 4 of Buffy and before the murder of Daniel on Alias (which was simultaneous with Season 6 of BtVS).

To be precise: after The Harsh Light of Day (and after Angel's In The Dark) but before The Initiative. Sydney Bristow is working in a state of bliss, still believing SD-6 to be part of the CIA and unaware that her father is anything but an airplane parts exporter. I have endeavored to keep the timelines accurate, but I may not have been entirely successful.

Actually, right off the bat, Sydney and Dixon shouldn't know about Rambaldi because they were introduced to this concept in the first Season of Alias. But, since we now know that Sloane has been chasing Rambaldi artifacts for at least thirty years, I think that JJ Abrams just threw in that introduction for the benefit of viewers.

Sydney has known Will for a year, and hasn't met Daniel. Oh yeah, those pesky monks inserted the memory of Dawn here too.

Cast of Characters:

From Buffy The Vampire Slayer:

Buffy Summers...Sarah Michelle Gellar

Dawn Summers...Michelle Trachtenberg

Joyce Summers...Kristine Sutherland

Alexander (Xander) Harris...Nicholas Brendon

Willow Rosenberg...Alyson Hannigan

Rupert Giles...Anthony Stewart Head

Spike, (AKA William the Bloody)...James Marsters

Harmony Kendall...Mercedes McNab

From Alias:

Sydney Bristow...Jennifer Garner

Jack Bristow...Victor Garber

Marcus Dixon...Carl Lumbly

Diane Dixon...Yvonne Farrow

Arvin Sloane...Ron Rifkin

Francie...Merrin Dungey

Marshall Flinkman...Kevin Weisman

Original Characters:

Able Montague...Dan Hedaya

Ingraham...Hey,it's that guy!

Security Section Agent 1...John Turturro

The novelist, afraid his ideas may be foolish, slyly puts them in the mouth of some other fool and reserves the right to disavow them.

--Diane Johnson


'Whatever is not nailed down is mine. Whatever I can pry loose is not nailed down'.–-Collis P. Huntington (1821 – 1900)

Able Montague walked slowly and cautiously down the tunnel. It was dimly lit, with odd furniture scattered about – there was dresser, a king-size bed, clothing scattered about the rock floor, and old rusty chandelier (he wondered where the power came from) – all told the effect was hideous. He couldn't imagine what kind of person would want to live in such a dank, dark, rat-infested, and generally inhospitable place, much less sleep here. He stiffened involuntarily when he spotted a corpse chained to the wall; apparently the poor guy had been tortured to death. He checked his Smith & Wesson .38, making certain it was loaded, safety off, and loose in its holster. Looking ahead in the uncertain light, he could see evidence of digging. Hell and damnation, he thought, all the goodies will be gone. Oh, well, I've come this far, I might as have a look anyway.

Stepping carefully up a side tunnel, he was amazed to see that someone had cut through the concrete and stone ceiling of the tunnel into an old crypt above. What a lot of work just to loot crypts! He easily suppressed his excitement because he fully expected to find an empty chamber, but he climbed up anyway, just in case something was left behind. As he got to his feet and shined his light around, he was utterly dumbfounded. He couldn't believe his eyes as he took in glorious piles of jewels, gold, silver trinkets … this was the discovery of a lifetime! He almost wished he were a real archaeologist instead of a looter, but that feeling passed quickly when he started to add up the meltdown worth of the gold alone. If he couldn't get at least a hundred thousand dollars out of this, his name wasn't Able! But first, he needed to do a careful cataloging to see if there was anything he could sell to his special customers.

The discovery left Able so full of energy that he didn't even notice the passage of time, and he hadn't had more than six hours sleep in the previous forty-eight hours. But he felt preternaturally awake when he picked up an ancient iron box that had been hidden under some jewel-encrusted robes and an old corpse. He nonchalantly broke the old iron lock with his rock hammer and applied force to the lid, which opened with a loud creak. He looked inside – at first he was terribly disappointed, it was just a junky old clock built on a music box base. But, he looked a little closer and noticed there were some nice jewels decorating the hands and tick marks. And some old writing. He paused, he felt his heart almost stop when he recognized the symbol engraved on the back: a pair of French brackets with a capitol 'O' in between.

He actually stopped breathing for a moment and then got out his loupe for a closer look. Then he frantically grabbed his cell phone and hit the speed dial, he was so excited he didn't even wonder that it worked from this far underground.