ACT ONE: An Ominous Start


CAMERA: Overhead shot of the hospital.

VOICE OVER: Today isn't just another day at Princeton Plainsboro Teaching Hospital. It's Friday the 13th, and tonight is a full moon. All signs are pointing to this being one Freaky Friday.

CAMERA: Zooms through the doors and into the bustling hospital.

VOICE OVER: But let us look in on the fine staff at PPTH. Everything seems normal enough. Ah, here comes Dr. House now.

HOUSE: (Walks in from corridor stage left) CUDDY!

(CUDDY bends down behind nurses station, pretending to pick something up.)

HOUSE: (peers over the desk) I know you're back there.

CUDDY: (straightens up) What is it Dr. House? (reluctance in her voice)

HOUSE: I want to go home.

CUDDY: I want $100,000,000. I think we will both have to live with our disappointment. (She heads off down a hallway. House follows)

HOUSE: I'm not feeling too hot.

CUDDY: (gives him once over) You look fine to me.

HOUSE: Back off. (He fakes like he's pushing her off him) Keep your dirty mind away from me.

CUDDY: (not amused) Funny. Now get back to work.

HOUSE: There really is something wrong with me.

CUDDY: You're a diagnostician. Go figure it out, in the clinic, while working on your patient.

HOUSE walks off as CUDDY continues in her original direction.

VOICE OVER: Little does House know that he is not the only one feeling a little out of it.

CAMERA: Fade out.


CAMERA: Fade in to Cameron and Foreman standing in the lab, taking turns looking into a microscope.

FOREMAN: I think we should run the test one more time.

CAMERON: Do you really think that's necessary.

FOREMAN: House could have made the wrong diagnosis. (Backs away, afraid Cameron will hit him)

CAMERON: When are you going to just back off? House knows what he's doing. (she holds her head as if in pain.)

FOREMAN: (Concern in his voice.) Is everything alright?

CAMERON: Yeah, I just, haven't been feeling myself today.

FOREMAN: You should get checked out. I heard House say he wasn't feeling too well either. Something might be going around.

CAMERON: It's probably nothing. Let's just run the tests one more time.

FOREMAN looks at her questioningly as she sets up the test again.

VOICEOVER: Something funny is going on with the staff of Princeton Plainsboro Teaching Hospital. Can they figure out what it is before it's too late?

MUSIC: Ominous Dun Dun Dun as Camera fades to black.