Authoress: yosh! I'm back already with chapter nine of Hensou! So, for all my wonderful reviewers…arigatou…and I promise…something will happen in this chapter…(well, pertaining to Sasuke and Naruto's relationship…) so…on to the story! And, of course, I'd like to thank my lovely beta readers for doing such a wonderful job /glomps Sentai-chan/ in only a few hours...they're so niiiiice!
Disclaimer: shhh, don't tell anyone that I don't own Naruto!
Naruto took a deep breath as he stretched his arms over his head, listening for the faint popping sounds his actions received. He smirked evilly as he bent backwards and the cracking noise returned, this time much louder and more frequent, as he doubled over backwards to touch the floor near his ankles.
"That's disgusting!" He could hear Haku's comment through the wall separating their apartments. The blonde chuckled, knowing that any bone cracking grossed Haku out terribly, as he started in on his knuckles. The older teen pounded on the wall before Naruto had even finished his first hand. In retaliation, the boy started twisting his neck. "Stop that!"
"Not until you admit it!"
"Never!" Sometimes his brother could be so stubborn.
"I won't, you pain in my ass!" Naruto laughed out loud at that. It wasn't often he could get Haku to curse at him, which meant he was really annoying his brother with his persistence. That only egged the blond on even more.
"Say it! You want me to move out of my apartment because you and Zabu-chan are getting into some new, kinky stuff!" Naruto finally brought up the subject they had been arguing over for the past day. Haku had 'suggested'-meaning he told Naruto outright-that the blonde had to move into one of the other apartments, which happened to be far enough away from his brother that he wouldn't hear Haku through the walls. Naruto had inwardly danced in joy at the chance to not listen to his brother and his lover's wild sex games, but another part of him wanted to know why. Haku had been the one to insist they live next door to each other.
Something was up and Naruto wanted to know exactly what it was, so he was going to get the information out of his older sibling if it killed Haku-or made the teen finally enlighten him on the situation. "Naruto! I said you should move out so you could get a larger apartment, since your friend is moving in with you!"
"…I don't believe you…" Naruto sang back, smirking as he heard his brother sighing in exasperation on the other side of the thin walls. Almost…the blonde thought to himself slyly as he hummed softly to himself. "Tell me why!"
"…fine! Because Iruka and Kakashi needed the apartment! You happy now?" Naruto stared at the wall, where his brother's voice had come from, and curiously thought over that new piece of information. Kakashi and Iruka had a huge apartment on the ground floor-so they didn't actually need another room. Haku obviously knew what Naruto was thinking about from the deep breath he took-which Naruto could easily hear through the wall. "…they wanted to surprise you…but Tsunade's moving into the apartment complex…"
"…iie! SHIMATTA!" Naruto screamed, flying through his front door and into his brother's apartment in a record five seconds, giving his brother a look that demanded an explanation. If Tsunade was moving in, there would be serious hell to pay. Not that Naruto didn't adore his surrogate aunt/grandmother, but there was only so much of her that the boy could handle. The fact that he found out, through Hinata, that their new principal was a 'Tsunade' with long blonde hair and a massive chest-AKA Tsunade-baa-chan, in Naruto's mind-made things even worse for Naruto. All the woman had to do was put two and two together to figure out her favorite nephew and the blonde troublemaker in her school were one and the same. And Tsunade, even though she didn't look it, was very intuitive when it came to things people were trying their hardest to hide from her.
"What's wrong now?" Haku asked as he looked up from an opened book in his lap. He was sitting in an overstuffed chair resting against the wall between their rooms, with his reading glasses on and all. Here Naruto was, imagining his brother had to be doing something-and reading (especially when talking with the blonde) didn't constitute as 'something' in Naruto's mind.
"…school…she's our new principal…" Naruto whimpered, leaping across the room to land into the chair with his brother. Luckily, Haku knew him well and had fast reflexes, so the glasses and book were sitting on a nearby table long before Naruto landed in his lap, lower lip trembling as he wrapped his arms around his brother. "And she's going to find out I'm cross dressing…and she'll never let me live it down…"
"Her girlfriend's moving in too," Haku commented coolly as he started reaching for his book again. Naruto cursed when he heard that. He really didn't have anything against Shizune, except that the woman was a total bitch to him for so many stupid reasons. Her latest cause was that Naruto didn't show proper respect to Tsunade. That was seriously some bondage relationship there. The black-haired woman worshipped the ground her lover walked on and thought that everyone else should do the same.
Naruto knew he was less than respectful when it came to his elderly (even though she would kill him for even thinking she was old) aunt, always calling her 'old hag' or something to that effect, but it was what she deserved after beating the crap out of him on every given occasion.
"Can my life get any worse?" Naruto wailed, sitting back so he could see the smile he knew was on his brother's pretty face. "And you laugh at me! You sadistic bastard! You helped me get into this, you have to help get me out…or somehow get Tsunade to ignore the fact I'm not here during the day…that there's a girl in my school who looks a hell of a lot like me…and that she and I have all the same friends…Shimatta…she's going to find out. Then Iruka and Kakashi, along with Jiraiya and Zabuza, will know…and I'll never be able to show my face again!"
"Oh, stop being a drama queen!" Haku sighed, patting the blonde's head. "Anyways, if Iruka and Kakashi didn't already notice the eerie similarities between Naruto and Aoi, they don't deserve to be called your fathers…and as for Jiraiya…well, he'd be better off not knowing…and Zabuza already knows…"
"I couldn't lie to him!" Haku tried to defend himself, but lost pitifully when he saw his brother's eyes begin watering. He knew what a good actor the blonde could be (and that Naruto could force himself to cry), but it didn't make it any easier to ignore the fact his baby brother was crying. "Daijoubu, Zabuza knew since the beginning and he hasn't treated you any differently! He actually admires you for going to such lengths for your dream!"
"…honto?" Naruto sniffled softly, giving his brother the puppy dog eyes that he had come to master years ago. It always helped that Haku was so emotional and could be easily swayed, but this just took the fun out of the fight. Haku returned the sniffle and glomped his brother from a sitting position.
"Yes, really! He won't ever admit it, but he does respects you for dealing with all this so you can go to school and achieve your goals!" Since Haku never had the ability to lie, Naruto took the boy's comment at face value and hugged the older teen. The black-haired teen chuckled and tightened his embrace around his brother.
"So…Hinata and I will be moving in a few doors down from you and Zabuza…Tsunade and that witch will be moving into my apartment…and somehow, we're going to have to sneak Sasuke past her door…along with Hinata and, probably, Neji…that is, if I can get those two back together…"
"Sheesh, I get home schooled and miss all this high school drama!" Haku stated sarcastically, laughing when Naruto punched him gently in the chest. "Look, Naruto, you shouldn't meddle in other people's affairs. If your friend Hinata doesn't want to be with her boyfriend…cousin…whatever he is…anymore…then just let it be…"
"But they were meant for each other, I know it! It's like Iruka and Kakashi…you and Zabuza…Ero-sennin and porn! I have to do something about it or else I'll always regret it!" Haku gently smacked his brother at the comment on Jiraiya, his eyes gazing over to the book he had been reading earlier. The young man smirked when Naruto's gaze followed his and the boy squealed when he read the title. "No way! Icha Icha Island! The R-rated, public-display edition? Ero-sennin wouldn't even let me flip through that book! It's not even sold in stores! How did you get it?"
"…Jiraiya owed me…for helping him get out of his latest writer's block…" Naruto gave his brother an incredulous glimpse, inwardly counting how many days it would take Haku to finish the book, then another day before he would let Naruto borrow it…but that meant that Naruto would have to blackmail him into letting his younger brother read it. The blonde watched his brother's face turn all shades of pink, which only got Naruto to wonder what exactly Haku had to do to get this ultra-rare book. "…don't give me that look…all I had to do was play around with Zabuza the other day in the club…and do a few things…Jiraiya happened to be close enough to hear a few things…and…it helped his writer's block.
"You're evil, you know that! What did Zabuza say?" Naruto stared at his brother in amazement. The brunette's lover wasn't exactly known for public displays of affection and, besides Naruto, Iruka, and Kakashi, very few people even knew that Haku and Zabuza were a couple-let alone a 'loud' couple. Before moving here, the neighbors had called the police most nights, telling them that their entire family was 'disturbing the peace' with all their loud parties. It went on for months and the calls to the police didn't stop until after Kakashi-somehow keeping a straight face through the whole ordeal-went over to the neighbors' houses to explain that it wasn't a party, but his best friend and the man's lover making all the noise. After that day, all their neighbors couldn't even look at Zabuza without blushing furiously. A few even went far enough to invest in ear plugs.
"He…didn't know…but I'm sure he won't mind…" Haku smiled in such a way, Naruto wondered what Jiraiya could have put into the book to give his already perverted brother even more ideas. The blond was very glad that he was moving away from the noisy couple. Tsunade and Shizune could sleep through anything, so it was a very good arrangement.
"You're such a perv…"
With that statement, Naruto quickly left his brother's apartment as he went over his future plans for his new home. For the first time in his life, something had gone right. When he first moved to Konoha, Naruto was sure he would be hated by everyone – just like in every other town and city he had ever lived in. Now, not even a year later, he found himself surrounded by friends who were just as close to him as his own mismatched family. Yes, for the first time in a long time, Naruto was happy about his life.
Authoress: …gomen…I know this chapter was short…but I just had to put up a new chapter of Hensou…I've been neglecting this story for so long…I'm sooooo sorry/smiles/ I've been pretty busy with my other Naruto fics (I've even gone so far as to have just added a new story…)…/bows/ I just want to thank everyone for actually waiting for this long overdue chapter and I hope you enjoy future updates (but, I will warn you now…things are going to get hairy in the coming months for our Konoha teens)…so, until then…ja ne…and please review! It really does help inspire an author to write more when they see those lovely numbers shoot upwards…/sighs/ it's a beautiful thing…
Sentai: Wow, I'm impressed. There's rarely any spelling mistakes. xP You're getting better.
Authoress:...ahh, it's so nice to have beta readers.../squeals/ they're so good to me...