Thoughts on Hitsuzen


Jill Rocca

Disclaimer: Well, the finals are finally over and soon I shall announce my contest winner (for all of you LD fans of mine), SO! Anyway, here's this story I'm thinking of either making a two-parter or a four-parter. I'm kind of becoming a big Yuuko x Watanuki fan, so here's my story. Which is weird since I'm a Kazahaya/Rikuo fan and Watanuki and Doumeki act quite like them. But whatever, first chapter from Watanuki's perspective. I was trying to get a category created for xxxHolic, but sadly...they never got back to me...

A naturally foreordained event...

Part 1: Hitsuzen

I still have no idea on what compelled my legs to enter Yuuko-san's house that day. The day of our hitsuzen. What the hell is hitsuzen anyway? But she has already explained it to me, but I still don't think I get it.

She calls me stupid and I wish that I had just let those spirits molest me more rather than touch that house, but it was an accident that I touched that house anyway, so none of it's really my fault.

But anyway, so when I entered, those weird girls pulled me in and I was trying to explain to them that I was there by accident, but they didn't seem to care. Nor did Yuuko-san, and I guess that's our hitsuzen.

When the two girls pulled back the screen and I see this beautiful woman smoking in a long and elegant-looking chair, I sort of just stop. Stop everything. My mouth stops moving, my feet stop moving, my eyes...fixed onto only her, and my heart stops beating.

But then I suddenly remember my place after she recites her definition on that hitsuzen crap, and I start to explain that I'm not really supposed to be there, and I don't want to be. For some reason the house seems dark, but friendly, and that's sort of scary if I think about how the feeling makes no sense, but for some reason my feet don't seem to want to move. I don't want to be here, I just want to go home, but for some reason, it feels like I should be here. I try to explain to her politely as she is annoying me somewhat with her stupid definitions, but I still don't think I really want to leave.

And so in response to my explanations, she gives me yet another vocabulary word; 'ward'. Like I really care that there's some magic on her weird fence guarding her even weirder house, I just want to get out of there and be home so I can start my homework, but I still don't want to leave. This house must also be some sort of a magnet, not only has it attracted my legs, but it's also strongly pulling them towards the ground.

I tell her that's enough. Or rather yell it at her when I lose my temper. I don't need any of her definitions.

And further insulting me, she says now that I am a 'bad-tempered kid'. As if! She should just stop annoying me...And those damn parrots won't stop mimicking everything she says. And as if I really need her to think I've got a bad temper! Damn parrots...

"Your name?" She asks slowly and suddenly.

Caught off guard, I give it to her. I sort of feel that I can trust her, but I don't think I really want to just yet.

"The Watanuki part, that's spelled with the characters for April 1st, correct?"

"What? How did you know how it was spelled, I didn't even tell you!" I say. She's really starting to catch me off balance. Just who is this woman? Could she be some sort of medium?

Then of course she asks for my birthday. Like I really want to tell a stranger, but I solemnly tell her it's April 1st.

She starts laughing at me and asking why I would tell a complete stranger my name and date of birth. Excuse me! As if I actually wanted to tell you!

And now she's saying, "We aren't connected are we?" And starts rambling on about knowledge of names or birth dates or one another, and I'm just standing there like, 'Hello!' What's her deal anyway. I'm not saying that I want to be connected to her, but isn't that hitsuzen-thing supposed to be all about connection?

Argh! What's the deal!

I'm trying to get her to tell me about what the hell she's going on about, but she responds even more randomly:

"Do you wish to know my name?"

Um...NO! I don't want anything to do with you! No matter how beautiful you are...

And of course, being as random as she can be, she tells me anyway, "It's Yuuko, Yuuko Ichihara, but of course that's an assumed name."

And then she lies about it too...I voice this. She ignores me, then she decides to inform me on the identities of the parrots.

So the pony-tailed one is...Maru. And the short-haired one is Moro. Creative...really creative. And then she goes even further telling me that their full names are,

"Maru-dashi and Moro-dashi. They're cute don't you think?"

"NO, THEY ARE NOT CUTE NAMES!" I yell in exasperation. Will this conversation go anywhere?

But okay, I'm already thoroughly convinced that this woman and her 'children', I think, are insane. I'm already starting to walk to the door. Maru and Moro are calling for me, but I don't really care. I really don't want to be here.

There! Freedom's almost upon me, I reach out for the door handle out of the room, to push i further out, but slams in my face. And I can't lie to myself, that I'm sort of happy it did, because...I can't keep lying to myself. I really don't think I want to leave no matter how many times I tell myself that.

"I told you once. Hitsuzen." She says, and I turn around. "There is no such thing as coincidences in this world. The only hitsuzen!"

Damn. Again with that hitsuzen thing. So was it destiny or fate that we met? She seems to not be able to decide. And I'm not sure if she's trying. And could she stop smoking already?

And now she's finally figured it out that I don't believe any of this, nor do I get it. And then, making me think that she's some medium even more now, she can tell that my watch is hidden in my pocket.

She asks for it. And unwillingly I give it to her. She takes it and then pulls out some weird circular object. It's got a ton of designs on it and while I'm wondering what it could actually be, Maru and Moro bring out a huge bowl. This Ichihara Yuuko puts the weird object into the bowl before I can really guess what it is and starts some sort of spell casting. Is what I'd guess you'd call it.

She says my name. It actually sounds good to hear her use it. She says it so smoothly, like my name is actually worth hearing to her. I like hearing her use it, I decide.

To bring me out of my reverie, she starts dictation to me about my past. How did she know I've moved several times? How does she know about my family? How does she know about my parents? And where I live...what the hell? Now she's going on about my appearance and work ethics? How does it that thing?

But it doesn't even look like it can predict things, or anything's written in the water...can she really see things that I can't?

And now she chooses this time to bring up those spirits.

Honestly, I had almost forgotten about them. That I could see them, when I was only seeing her...but...just from my name and my birthday...she knows so much.

At least this is what she's telling me now anyway. Apparently, it's written all over my face. I just can't see it.

"And that means...your watch is mine!" She says joyfully.

What? Hold on, wait just a minute! That watch it mine! My parents gave it to me when I was five...I can barely remember the day, but I know they gave it to me...before they...they...

Anyway, the point is, she can't have my watch! Mom and Dad said it was important, and that I should take good care of it. Which was what I had been doing before she's deciding to take it away from me as a payment for telling me about my past.


Thanks, thanks a lot.

You know, I was really fond of that thing. You wonder why it's so nice do you? It's because I took good care of it.

But at least she knows how many centuries it's been passed down with her weird bowl, and I guess it'll be okay, but I don't want her to have it just yet.

"Just what the hell is this place anyway?" I shout looking around.

"It's a shop," comes Ichihara-san's voice. "A shop that sells wishes."

"How do you sell a wish?" I ask, not expecting her to answer me.

"You have a wish do you not?" She asks, completely avoiding the question as I thought. "I can grant it,"

"I don't have any!" I say. Unless you count getting out of here and getting my watch back, I think to myself.

"'I wish I didn't have to see them,' Is what you've thought right? The spirits?"

I'm stunned. Sure I don't want to see those damn things anymore, but how did she...was it that bowl again! What payment does she want now?

"They're attracted to the blood that runs through your veins don't they? If you want, you won't have to see them, nor will they be attracted to your blood." She further explains.

This is so overwhelming, I slump onto the floor. "Are you serious?" I ask, just making sure this isn't all a hoax. This is way to good to be true.

The parrots assure me that she can grant this wish. And finally I believe her. I'll do anything to stop them from coming after me, but then I'm not so sure. It's the only tie I have left to my parents. It's our blood after all.

"Right, so I'll grant your wish," She says taking a long draw on her pipe.

I jump up at this completely taken-aback. She's just going to do it? "Hold on! I haven't even wished for anything yet!"

"It doesn't matter, the bonds of fate are already connected."


"I told you before, we have become involved," She says, mysteriously.

Is she talking about that hitsuzen again? How many definitions is she going to come up with!

"A bond of fate never disappears once tied," She explains.

So are we destined to be together then? This is all happening too fast...what is it that I really want? To be closer to her, or...not?

"But what are you saying?" I ask her.

She smiles at me. She should do it more often. "That everything in a person's lifetime has meaning," She explains still smiling. I really like her smiles, it's genuine. Makes her look even more...beautiful...

She asks me again if I have a wish. I explain to her that it's not really a wish, but more like something I just don't want to see anymore. I'm sorry mom and dad, but I'll never forget you, even without the spirits.

Yuuko Ichihara promises me that she'll grant my wish.

"Now..." She says smiling mischievously and sticking out her hand to me.

What does she want me to take it?

"...About your payment..."

What? That's what she wants! She just sells this stuff?

And of course she chooses now—and the parrots mimic her—that this is a shop. And of course I don't really have anymore watches handy in my pockets, so I tell her that we'd better call it off.

"But your application has been received and accepted, no backing out now," She tells me.

Getting angry at her and about to say more things, she decides that this time, she shall examine me in a mirror. Completely thrown by this, I put my arms down from my rage, and just stare at her.

She starts singing something about a mirror and her parrots join in with new phrases. I don't get them, and she tells me she didn't expect I would. Something about a generation gap or another.

She examines it and says tenderly, " The lines of this run deep,"

What lines?

"You've suffered my pain..."

What? Wasn't that what the bowl was for?

"Now, get to work!" She says snappily.

WHAT THE HELL! Where does this woman get off? I have no idea what she's playing at. Where does she get this idea that I'm about to suit up and start working for her.

But apparently she thinks that I am, because this is my payment...

Payment for that wish...

So now, I'm in her clutches. Great just great, just what I need, more things to put up with. She planned this all along...I KNOW SHE DID!

Why can't she just be nice?

Why can't she see I've already gone through to much?

And now it's bad enough I'm starting to think that I like her...WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?

But how can I get so angry at this woman? Oh right, she's the most random person that I've ever met. But...not only did she steal my feet going in the door, my watch, and my free time, but I think she's stolen my heart too. Just one more look at her beautiful face and that proves it.

I start working right away.

My real wish should be to be with her.

End part 1. Sorry the ending was kind of random. Next part is in Yuuko's perspective.