First of all thankyou to my lovely, violent and threatening reviewers! I love you all! In true Shikamaru fashion I was just going to watch movies and eat 2 minute noodles today, but I went to check my reviews and I got so scared I immediately started writing! Congratulations!
As for why I have school coming up, I live in Australia so school starts soon, and I have to spend the last week of holidays skiing in Falls Creek. (Not that I'm complaining coz I love skiing, there's just no internet!) Now all my valuable and prized reviewers…(the recent ones)
Megagirl14045 Eerily calm threat, had me worried…very creepy…uum, thankyou!
Dagget This takes the prize for best review! I clicked on the page and immediately saw SON OF A BITCH and I thought 'Shit, I'd better continue!' So I did. Thankyou for…inspiring me!
Shiko Just breathe, okay? Try a paper ba maybe! I'm glad you like the story though, and with a 'Sasuke on top'? Most definitely! Mwahahahahaha…
lost complex Head chopping, blood craving, jumping bunny! Aaaiiiee! RUN, RUN WHILE YOU STILL CAN! SAVE THE CHILDREN, WON'T SOMEBODY THINK OF THE CHILDREN! sobs hysterically Thankyou!
AnTiJaKe Well sooorry! If you don't like the story you need to leave 'constructive criticism' which means the review has to be more than one word. I mean seriously, 'Gay.' That's ALL you said! One word! Get a life, if you don't like to read Yaoi, then why'd you read my story? The blurb-thingy was pretty clear. And I looked at your profile…and you say fuck to much. Seriously.
Anei Akuma NOOOO! NOT MY PLUSHIES! cries …your gonna get your dog to pee on the ashes! Nasty!
Naughty Sensei I'm glad you thought it was funny! At first I was worried that the story wouldn't have any humour, then I thought: What's funnier than an insanely jealous/over-protective Sasuke yelling "PROTECT YOUR CARNAL TREASURE!"
Tamara2187 I know, it's so cuuuute! I love a jealous and possessive Sasuke, makes you wanna glomp him! BADLY! smiles They'll be plenty more 'Sasuke inner dialogue' where that came from, so don't worry!
Hakakou I know. sigh I hate school, it takes away precious writing time! I can't even escape class, at my school the teacher has to sign that all students are present at EVERY SESSION. You don't catch the bus, they ring the school, your not at first roll call, they ring your parents. Parents find out, internet privileges taken away indefinitely. And I really really HATE it when I read a good story and it's never been finished, and I REALLY don't want that to happen…I just hope I can keep the updates coming!
Tandakku As for while Neji grope Naruto…I can't believe you guys have never seen the movie! Well then, I won't reveal much except… drum roll there is going to be a Nejinaru make-out-in-the-back-seat-of-a-car scene! Mwahahahaha!
Ly Mizukage Yes there will be some molestation…mwahahaha! Wether they'll be real-life or Sasuke day-dreams remains to be seen…
Princess Kitana That was one of my favourite bits from the movie! As for groping, read my reply to Tandakku!
Naruto stared wide-eyed around the limousine, thinking only one thing: "Holy shit!"
Soon (after many attempts) he figured out which button made the window go down, (He could understand a back massage button, but a drink heater/cooler and then a buttock massager!) and stuck his head out to take a look.
They were now about to enter Hyuuga territory, a huge village-like place full of rich, well-bred, beautiful people.
Naruto spat out some of his Original Pringles as he saw one last hitch-hiker, before the limo pulled into the Hyuuga property.
The hitch-hiker (not only winked at him and blew him a kiss) was wearing a skimpy red bikini with a sign reading: 'Left clothes in Mist Village!'
(Little did he know that she was soon picked up by a famous and perverted director called Jiraiya!)
Oblivious to the disdainful and condescending looks he was getting from others, Naruto gaped open-mouthed at the beauty and splendor, until he was gently guided to his rooms by (one of the many) servants in the Hyuuga villa.
"This is your room, Sir." Naruto could only manage a strangled 'thank you' before he ran screaming to go jump up and down on his bed.
"This room is, is…the most fantastic thing I've ever seen!"
And that wasn't an understatement.
Naruto didn't know, but he was staying in the 'Celebrity Suite', which was used only for important guests, usually there on business.
A large king-sized water bed, 24 hour room service,
("You mean I can have Ramen whenever I want!" Hyperventilates, again.)
also a Jacuzzi/sauna.
There were all the latest gadgets, the latest movies, even the latest music…all Naruto could have possibly needed or wanted was just a button-click away.
"Remind me again why I'm doing this?" Neji snarled for the 67th time.
"Because the guy is wholesome, Neji. And with all the publicity this will bring, Jiraiya will have to stop breathing."
Shikamaru ground his teeth as his troublesome client kept on whining about his 'unfair' and 'stupid' plan.
"…What's the guy's name anyway?" Ino threw another suit at Neji for him to try on before looking down at her clip board.
"Uzamaki Naruto. Lives with his foster father Umino Iruka and his foster father's partner, Hatake Kakashi."
Neji looked in the mirror and smoothed down his already impossibly smooth, long, dark hair. "Uzamaki Naruto? Sounds insanely boring." He snorted sarcastically, and Ino tapped her foot impatiently.
"Hurry up, Neji! You take longer than me to get ready for Christ's sake!"
"And that's saying something…" Shikamaru muttered, before feeling a sharp pain at the back of his head.
"WHAT! HOW DARE YOU INSULT YOUR OWN GIRLFRIEND?"
Ino soon stormed out of the room with a snickering Neji, who threw a cast-off tuxedo jacket at his poor manager.
Sighing, Shikamaru pulled the jacket off his head. "Too troublesome…"
"It's very nice to meet you, Neji. …no wait, It's very nice to meet you, Neji.
Uuuum…It's very nice to meet you, Neji. Excellent! Okay…"
Naruto cleared his throat and looked his reflection in the eye. He was sitting in front of a mirror practicing for the moment when he would come face to face with the Hyuuga heart-throb, Neji.
"Your films will stand the test of time. Your films will stand the test of time. Your films will stand the test of time. Your films will stand the test of time. Your-"
Suddenly there was a knock at the door of Naruto's room.
Ohmygod Ohmygod Ohmygod Ohmygod Ohmygod Ohmygod…THAT'S HYUUGA NEJI!
Slowly Naruto shyly opened the door, only to feel like his heart had not only skipped a beat, but stopped all-together.
Dear God, he's even more handsome in real life...
Naruto felt rather faint as he looked over the gorgeous movie star, not noticing Neji himself looked rather shell-shocked.
Silky, dark, shoulder lengthy hair framed a pale skinned face. He had lavender coloured eyes, and a really really good looking mouth…suddenly the mouth moved.
Neji gawked at the stunning creature that had opened the door. This was the Win a Date guy! He was heavenly…
Lightly tanned skin with three whisker marks on each cheek, giving him a rather fox-like look…
Sun-kissed hair and luscious candy-pink lips…and then those eyes!
Never had Neji seen such deep, deep cerulean eyes…they pulled him into their depths and suddenly Neji felt like he couldn't breathe.
"I'm drowning..." he thought vaguely, and before he could stop himself he blurted out in shock:
BACK 2 GENERAL POV:
Naruto felt his head spin, Neji thought he was attractive!
Give the guy a bowl of Ramen and he could have died happy.
Say something Uzamaki, you've been waiting for this moment your entire life…this is it…
"Your standing films will test themselves time again."
There I said it! I actually complimented Neji…!
"…What the hell?...oh no! He's the most beautiful person I've ever seen, but quite possibly mentally retarded! NOOOOOOO!"
Neji felt like crying, his perfect guy couldn't even talk normally!
"So…Naruto…how was your flight?"
Naruto continued to stare dazedly at those lovely lips, wait…did they just move again!
Dammit! What'd he say…God those lips…mmm…NO! Snap put of it! Say something…
"Your films will stand the test of time."
D'oh! I've already said that!
"What…?OH! YEEESS! He's not crazy! …just a little star-struck! Thank god!"
"Eeerm, thankyou…so, you ready?"
Finally Naruto snapped back to reality, and looked up in bewilderment. "Ready for what?"
Neji gave knowing smirk, and linking arms with Naruto pulled the blonde down towards him.
Gasping Naruto leant back against his chair in the limo, finding hard to breathe in the aftermath.
Still rather taken aback, Naruto looked over at the smug Neji. "Uh…wow…I mean….is it always like that?" He asked breathlessly, "I mean, that's my first time doing anything like that…is it?"
Neji laughed at the blue-eyed boy's child-like curiosity and winked. "With me it is."
"Oh…okay…" Naruto gave out a sigh and (still shocked) thought back to what happened.
"For this…" Neji pulled Naruto down the stairs, and then all the fun began.
Media was everywhere, the paparazzi swarming like bees to honey…after all, the public liked nothing more than a reformed sinner!
Naruto felt dizzy as all the cameras flashed in his faces, voices all yelling and shouting at him for comments, each news reporter clamoring to get a closer look at the winner of the 'Win a Date' contest.
He was pushed and prodded, had complete strangers bellowing in his ears and all he could see was bright white flashes everywhere.
Meanwhile Neji, cool as can be, was smiling and posing for the cameras, lightly pulling the befuddled blonde-haired boy towards their waiting limousine.
End Flashback POV
A/N: And you thought Neji had done something else to our poor Naruto, didn't you! Mwahahahaha….!
And so started Uzamaki Naruto's date with Hyuuga Neji.
Meanwhile a half-drunken Sakura and a miserable Sasuke sat at the bar, drinking Tequila. Sasuke (who was attempting to drown his sorrows in alcohol) looked over at the intoxicated check out chick.
"Sakura…what do you think they're doing right now?
Sakura pondered this question for a moment, and then her eyes took on a glass-like quality.
"I'll bet they're both at her hotel room, straining for breath…Neji's manhood yearning to be free…Naruto's hands rubbing over the ripples in Neji's abdomen…Naruto, crying out in ecstasy…." Sakura gave a longing sigh and then returned to her drink.
Sasuke, now very disturbed, turned back to his drink.
Downing the last of the Tequila, Sasuke motioned to one of the bartenders.
"Keep 'em coming…" Sasuke said bitterly, then continued to hit his head against the bar table.
End! Sorry if it's kinda short but I have to pack, and wanted to write before I left! I'll be skiing for about a week….so I don't know when the next update will be! But have faith reviewers, and keep threatening me, it helps!
Mwa! Love you all!