Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters and if I did, I probably would be writing the 7th book right now.
A/N: This is my first fic so hope you like!
Chapter 1: Everyone's Got A Problem
I watch the look in his eyes drop, I know he can see the blood on my arm; it's fresh. He moves towards me, but I pull back cautiously. He can sense my fear; he knows me all too well, and he knows I'm scare of what he will think of me. I numbness; all that I can physically fell are my tears running down my pale cheek and the blood trickling down my arm. I want to run away, hide and never come out. He makes me fell so inferior, like I can't do anything right. I want him to hold me and tell me it's going to be alright, but he won't, he's too angry.
"Hermione, what the hell are your doing to yourself?" he said, I could tell he was trying to hide the anger in his voice, yet wasn't succeeding. He was starting at the knife in my hand.
"Harry…I ... I don't know what to say… please don't be mad at me," I cried at him, my eyes were wet, making it hard to see.
"Hermione…HOW CAN YOU FUCKING DO THAT TO YOURSELF?" Harry practically screamed at me, his anger extremely apparent now.
All I was doing now was sob; Harry could make me feel so sad. He was the only person who could really hurt me like this.
Harry saw the increase in my tears and instantly his anger dropped; he looked sadly at me, tears forming in his bright green eyes. Before I could pull back he had wrapped his arms around me, holding me tightly and not letting me go.
"Harry…" I whispered into his chest.
"Yes?" He said back, his lips touching my ear as he spoke.
"Please help me… Harry, I don't know what to do. I just want to run away and never see anyone again," I said to Harry, my voice cracking.
"I wish I could…" He said.
With that, Harry walked out of the room, confused, but leaving me there to continue what I didn't finish.
Damn it! Not again, why do I always end up like this? He lay there asleep on the other side of my bed; he looked harmless enough, but she knew wasn't harmless at all, he could kill.
I need to get the hell out of here. Please god, don't let him wake up. As I woke up, I heard a loud moan came from next to me.
OH FUCK! WHAT THE FUCK DID I JUST DO?
I saw his eyes flutter open softly, but they turned cold as soon as he saw me slipping out of bed.
"Where the fuck do you think you're going bitch? I'm not done with you, so get your bitch ass back in this bed because I am not done with you, you piece of worthless shit," he spat at me, and I could sense that I was going to regret trying to leave. I was right because the next thing I knew, he had grabbed my wrist, twisted it behind me, and slammed me down. I now lay in between him and the hard mattress; my wrist felt like someone was running over it with a bus.
'Let me go! I am not yours to play with. I am not a bitch, slut, whore or whatever else you want to call me; I am a real person with real feelings.' This is what I wanted and intended to say, but I could never say that to him, because I am weak. All I wished was to be able to say that to him and stand up to him, but I can't.
All I managed to say was "Stop. Stop! STOP!" Tears were freely flowing down my cheeks as I stared at him, hoping to see some sort of comfort in his eyes, but all I say was hatred.
Suddenly a sinister grin appeared on his face; he drew his hand back and slapped me as hard as he could across my face. Tears still flowing, I started trying to scream as soon as he started up again, just like he had last night, but my throat had swelled, leaving me there to just take all this shit from as he put me through the most unbearable pain I'd ever experienced. He didn't seem to care what I was feeling or how every single part of my body ached in indescribable pain.
His grin was still plastered on his face as he hit me again and again, as I reached the farthest my body would go, I collapsed on top of my wrist that was still behind my back painfully.
"Get up bitch, we're not done here, and we won't be for a long time," he growled at me. He was hungry, hungry for me, and he wasn't going to stop, like he said, for a long time.
Oh fuck this is disgusting! I was so drunken sick in the bathroom of the Three Broomsticks, kneeling over a toilet, puking my guts out, and wondering what the hell I had just done again. I knew what was going to happen, someone was going to come in, see me throwing up, and take me back to the castle where I would be put in the hospital ward again for obsessive drinking.
I felt the urge to hurl again. I so drunk I couldn't exactly see where I was anymore. I heard the sound of footsteps coming towards my stall and stop in front of me. I couldn't tell who it was until the person spoke.
"Lavender what the fuck have you done to yourself?" Ron said, his eyes peering down at my crouched over figure the sat on the floor.
"What…...what…are you doing….doing here?" I tried as hard as I could not to slur my words but it ended up sounding worse. "In the girls bathroom I mean," I added to make it seem like I still had some sense in my mind.
"I saw you stumble in here, and I was worried about you," Ron said as he leaned down to my face, in his eye I could see he really cared, but I was too drunk to care.
"I don't need you to worry about me; I can take care of myself better than any other motherfucker can! I am not some whore who drinks herself to death, and I certainly don't need your worthless ass looking out for me, because I AM FINE!" I shouted at him, not knowing why I was so pissed off but I felt an instant wave of nausea come over me.
"Lavender…I was just trying to help. You don't have to turn into such a bitch!" Ron shouted back at me. He now towered over me and I could tell he was now angry.
"Get the fuck out of here!" I screamed.
"I am not going to do that because you are not fine!" Ron screamed as loud as he could.
"NOW LISTEN TO ME RON WEASLY, I AM FUCKING FINE! I DON'T KNOW WHAT EVERYONE IS SO FUCKING CONCERNED ABOUT; I AM IN COMPLETE CNTROLL OF EVERYTHING AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO BE MY BABYSITTER!" I yelled at him, tears rolling fast down my cheeks. I just wanted him to leave alone to take care of myself and what I had done.
He just stared at me in shock, processing what I had just said.
"Fine, I'll leave you, but when something happens you can't control, don't come crying to me," Ron spat at me, and just as I had told him to do, he left. For some reason, I now felt even worse.
What the fuck had I done? He just stood there starring lifelessly at me, because I told him. I told him what happened. I told him why he should have listened to me when I said no, but he didn't, and now we have to face this. All I wanted to do was cry my eyes out and have him hold me.
Now he wanted no part of me, because I was dirty to him.
"How could you let this happen?" He said, starring intently at her.
"I didn't you were the one who wanted to so you should have taken care of that and made sure this didn't happen!" I yelled at him. I was not going to be pushed around by him. this was his problem too and I was not going to be left alone in the dark.
"I don't love you Ginny. This was supposed to be just a fling, and that was all it was meant to be. I will not have any part of this mess that is now your reality and I have no intention of marrying you and living happily ever after with you. Please, just get away from me!" he shouted at me.
He pushed me out of the way as he made his way for the door, just as he got there he looked back, leaving me there alone with my problem now, not ours', my problem. He continued his way out the door without a word. All I could do is stand there and watch the first person who I had ever been with, walk away from me. I wanted to cry, but I knew I couldn't give him that satisfaction.
I walked over to the door he had just left and waited there for a while. I didn't even know what I was waiting for but I couldn't move. For hours I stood there, and all I could think was he thinks I'm dirty over and over again.
I finally allowed myself to walk towards the common room, thinking all the way there, I'm not ready to be a mother.
End Chapter 1
A/N: I hope you liked it, this is my first piece of fan fiction and I am SO HAPPY! Ok, please review!