Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, I do own the right to entertain ya all with my more fun stories XP...Enjoy the things that happen when Jiraiya finds himself in really awkward events and both Naruto and Neji as well. And now on with the story...Warning for first chapter about Sakura gettin bashed more or less...XP
Icha Icha Paradise The True Story
Chapter 1: Hatred brings Love
Our friend, Jiraiya was out on his average day of gathering information for his novels.
As he was spying on the nurses changing outfits in the hospital he suddenly sensed Naruto's chakra in action.
Normally it wouldn't trouble him but he felt it from the top of the hospital roof and decided to check it out.
There he was surprised to see a raging inferno and he decided to hide somewhere among the shadows.
The flames of Sasuke's Goukakyou no jutsu destroyed most of Naruto's Kage Bunshin.
As the flames disappeared, Naruto was standing in the middle of it, with a Kage Bunshin, charging his Rasengan.
"What the...Is that Jutsu?" Sasuke said surprised.
Naruto held his Rasengan up and his Kage bunshin disappeared.
"Shit..." Sasuke snarled as he held his hand in front of him.
"Chidori!" Sasuke yelled.
"I'll definitely win!" Naruto yelled as he charged towards Sasuke with his Rasengan.
"Don't be so confident!" Sasuke yelled charging in with his Chidori.
"Stop it!" Sakura screamed and ran towards the middle of them.
"Shit..." Sasuke cursed as he saw Sakura standing between them.
"I can't..." Naruto said to himself.
A second later Sakura was hit by both the Rasengan and the Chidori.
Sakura's body fell down on the floor with a large hole in her body and circular wounds of the Rasengan.
Both Sasuke and Naruto looked shocked.
"So where were we?" Sasuke asked as he looked away from Sakura's body.
"Eh...I don't know...We just basically killed Sakura-chan..." Naruto said confused and plain and looking back at Sasuke.
"Point being, dobe?" Sasuke asked.
"Shouldn't we feel sad or something because our hatred and actions killed her?" Naruto asked in return.
Both of them were silent.
"Well then shall we get out of this hospital then and like...Train more?" Sasuke asked randomly.
"Ehm...Yeah I guess so...No one saw this so I guess they'd think Sakura got killed by some foreign nin or so...Let's go and train! Your Goukakyou no Jutsu is kind of weak you know, Sasuke." Naruto said cheerful.
"What did you say! It's not like your Rendan is flawless either you know!" Sasuke said.
"It beats your Shishi Rendan!" Naruto replied.
"We shall see that at the training grounds!" Sasuke replied in return
"Race you to it!" Naruto said as he started running away.
Sasuke looked pissed off and quickly tried to catch up on Naruto.
Jiraiya was shocked by all of this and wanted to go and pick up Sakura and bring her to Tsunade.
But all of a sudden he sensed someone else coming and thus he stayed in the shadows.
Kakashi jumped down and found Sakura.
"What the...This is horrible...Who did this..." Kakashi said.
"...She's still breathing!" Kakashi said out loud when he softly heard Sakura breathing with his ever sharp hearing.
Kakashi quickly picked her up and went of to Tsunade's place to get her healed.
Jiraiya decided to follow Kakashi and tried to catch up with him.
However, Kakashi was faster then usual and Jiraiya couldn't catch up.
Kakashi arrived real soon at Tsunade's place and instantly brought Sakura in.
Tsunade was shocked to see the wounds on Sakura but she didn't wait for Kakashi to say something and instantly started using her full medical skills.
After a minute or two her largest wounds were closed and starting to heal.
"Her wounds are healing...Tsunade-sama's healing skills are amazing." Kakashi thought as he moved his eyes away from Sakura's body and up to Tsunade.
Kakashi was a bit shocked and gained a slight blush on his face, because he got quite the view from Tsunade.
"...I never realised how hot she actually is..." Kakashi thought then as he stared at Tsunade.
Jiraiya looked trough the window into the room and saw that Tsunade did doing a great job on healing Sakura from both of Sasuke and Naruto's attacks.
He was about to turn around and go away when he suddenly heared things moving in the room.
Jiraiya turned around and was shocked by what he saw in the room.
Jiraiya never expected so see such a thing going on the medical table near the door.
"Kakashi what are you doing!" Tsunade yelled.
"Wow...now this is something you don't see every day." Jiraiya said to himself with a grin on his face as he continued watching.
Just as Kakashi and Tsunade were in the middle of their little getting to know eachother the door opened.
"Tsunade-sama I got the..." Shizune said who walked in but stopped talking as she saw Kakashi and Tsunade.
"Tsu...Tsunade-same...you..." Shizune stuttered.
"Shut up Shizune and join in." Tsunade said as she grabbed Shizune and practically made her join.
Jiraiya couldn't believe what he was seeing.
He couldn't help it but watch.
Then all of the sudden, Sakura slowly lifted her body up.
Tsunade saw this in the corner of her eye and instantly moved away from Kakashi and Shizune.
She then gave Sakura a punch to her head sending her flying against the wall near the window that Jiraiya was peeking trough.
Jiraiya was afraid to be got peeking and quickly got away.
"Tsunade-chan! Why did you do that! She might be really dead now!" Kakashi said a bit confused at the moment.
"Shizune! Keep Kakashi busy for now!" Tsuande ordered.
Shizune nodded as she grabbed Kakashi and pulled him away.
Tsunade quickly started healing Sakura again from any brain fractures she just received.
Jiraiya, however, now had the hugest inspiration for his novels and decided to use this in his latest Icha Icha Paradise novel.
He thought it couldn't get any better today.
As he was heading to his secret shelter near the edge of Konoha he noticed everyone's favorite Hyuuga walking on the streets not really paying attention to his envirement.
Jiraiya for some reason felt he like spying on our friend Neji today to see if some other crazy things might happen today.
Just then he noticed Anko walking a bit drunk over the road on a collision course with Neji, who for once was enjoying the birds in the sky.
"Hmmm...Let's see what happens..." Jiraiya thought as he stopped to look at the two of them.
Author Notes: Mysterious music plays What will happen XP? Next chapter brings the start of the match-ups and all, the more romance starts later tho. Please R&R !