It Sounds Like Love
By Henrika

Henrika- Yes! I have a Barry the Chopper fic! It's based entirely on the manga scene that sadly wasn't in the anime(divergent plotlines) but is nonetheless hilarious. I included a manga link (the Barry/Riza part is in volume 8)

I love Roy/Riza!

http/groups dot msn dot com/FullMetalAlchemist/whatsnew dot msnw

Anybody else annoyed at having to renew their posting contract every three days? Oh well, small price to pay I guess, though I am slightly annoyed that there are ads on the bottom of the page now too.

If someone had told her that she was going to spend an evening with a soul bound in a suit of armor; she would have laughed. If someone would have told her that that armor would be completely devoted to her at first sight, she would have said they were crazy. But here she was, sitting in the park with said armor; who was continuously declaring his love and affection.

Along with continuously asking her if he could chop people up.

"Let me dissect you Missy."

"No!" Riza said, her legendary patience wearing thin.

"Then those guys who are walking past." He pointed to some drunks.

"Definitely not!" Ack…Please hurry up and come Colonel.

She had called Roy in what now seemed like hours ago(less than a half-hour), saying that she had caught some weirdo. And granted, as she listened to the armor's repeated pleas to slice someone up, she was right on the weirdo part. She sighed. Her one day off she had been forced to use to buy groceries and now she was stuck here watching over a prisoner who was supposed to have been executed.

"Don't be sad Missy. Why don't you let me dice you into pieces and…"

"For the last time; No!" Riza snapped. "And stop calling me Missy."

"But I always call women I love 'Missy'." He insisted. Riza blew his head off with a single shot, taking comfort in the familiar scent of gunpowder. "You can't do that to Barry the Chopper! It's not nice to shoot people Missy, especially scary ones like me!" She aimed again. "Hey!"

"Pick up your head, put it on, and sit quietly until the Colonel comes." She ordered.

The armor scrambled to follow the instructions. "I really like a strong woman who knows how to take charge."

"Quietly." She reminded, waving her firearm in his direction. She sighed again. As creepy as the declarations of love were, it was kind of nice to hear them articulated. She thought of Roy. The Colonel would never say those things. She sighed yet again, realizing she had been doing a lot of that this evening. It'd be nice to hear those words from him, at least once in awhile. She wondered where the man was again as Barry began singing happily to his cleaver.

"Lieutenant!" A voice hailed to her left and she stood, resisting the urge to fly into the man's arms and rage at him for leaving her alone with a lunatic for so long.

Instead, she collected herself as best she could; ignoring the extremely confused look on her superior's face.

"Sorry for bothering you at such a busy time Colonel." She resisted the urge to whack Barry's head off again as his arms snaked around her waist, his cleaver pointing at Mustang.

"Missy, who's this punk?"

"Hey, you be quiet."

"Move aside Lieutenant." Roy pulled on his flint gloves, his eyes glowing evilly. "The flame power tonight is gonna be extra strong."

Ok, so maybe it wasn't an emotion-filled declaration of love. But, Riza decided. Men speak better with actions than words. He was protecting her. And she took a full thirty seconds to revel in that fact before stopping Roy from melting Barry down into a scrap heap.

After all, maybe the colonel could learn something from him.

I LOVE that scene. It is just far too hilarious!