A/N: After much personal deliberation, I have made the decision to reinsert my previous edited out short epilogue into the official body of the story. It's unbetaed but I do think it does round off what is, after all, not primarily a romance, in a more even fashion. I hope this meets with approval. My Annotated story notes can be found underneath it. :)
The next few weeks proved interesting.
Remus had been the first to admit that he was having difficulty adjusting to life without the wolf. For as long as he could remember, it had been there, lurking, watching, waiting to pounce and to be alone in his own mind, to know that every thought and impulse that he felt was all his own… It was different, to say the least. For the first time, he could draw a line, say to himself and others that this was him and him alone. And although so much of his life, his personality had been shaped by what he was, by what he knew lay inside of him, it did not change the fundamental fact of who he was.
It was really rather reassuring.
But it was not until his first post-Kiss full moon that Remus truly came to terms with the new equilibrium of his life. The transformation itself had been much the same, the familiar wrenching tear of his body as it twisted into its wolfish shape. But in his mind, he was alone. There was no roar of the wolf, no battle, no sense of imminent invasion. Even Wolfsbane had never freed him so completely from his now absent other half. But it was on the morning after, waking with the understanding that the wolf was truly gone, that his mind was truly his own, that Remus became comfortable within his own skin once more.
I'm me, he told himself. I was always me. I just didn't realise it.
His emotions settled, falling back into familiar patterns. His father and Tonks, once she was well enough, were heaven sent, reminding him of facts he was vague about, helping him to understand how so little could change when so much within was different. His visiting hours were swamped by a sea of faces; Felisha and Avin, armed with invitations to their Christmas wedding, Harry, Ron and Hermione hurrying his return to school. Half of the Order of the Phoenix appeared at one point or another, mostly bearing gifts; Moody came with a foe glass and dire warnings about watching his back in future, Hestia Jones arrived from upstairs with a smile and chocolate and Dedelus Diggle, inexplicably, gave him a hat. Arthur Weasley brought him a banjo, insisting it would be a fine way to pass the time. Molly Weasley brought him a towering vat of soup.
Albus and Minerva's visit brought the news that his classes were covered until the end of term and that they would see him bright and early next September the first. Remus wasn't sure whether to be relieved or sorry.
Kingsley's visit was more solemn. He brought with him a note from Peter Pettigrew.
Remus had stared at it for a long time, scruffy, familiar writing scribbled on Ministry notepaper. His eyes drifted across the three simple words that made up the sum total of the message.
Please, Remus. Please.
Kingsley offered him the chance to visit Azkaban or send a note in response.
For this time, he had nothing more to say.
Tonks was released three weeks after she had awoken, well but for occasional weariness that eased away as time flew by. She came to see him every day.
And then, six weeks after the chaos of the Institute had changed his life forever, Remus Lupin returned to Winter Hollow.
And Nymphadora Tonks went with him.
Reynard Lupin was not there. Remus had not known what to say that morning as he stepped into his childhood home only to have his father turn to him and press the keys abruptly into his hand.
"It's yours now, Remus," he had said softly. "Rolphe's invited me to live at Greystones and I've decided to accept." He had smiled fondly. "We all have to go home sometime. And somehow I doubt you'll be living here alone."
And he had been right. His tentative invitation for Tonks to move in had been met with a squeal of joy and a very substantial bout of kissing.
There was no doubt about it. His life was going to be very different from now on…
"Are you sure my hair looks all right?"
Remus smiled fondly as he raked his eyes over the insane mass of bright pink curls that nestled on Tonks' head as they glinted brightly in the glowing light of a glorious summer sun. The gentle breeze that drifted down the lane was ruffling them charmingly.
"It looks you," he told her frankly, leaning forward to place a reassuring kiss against her forehead. "And that's fine by me."
He grinned as her eyes burrowed pointedly into his face. "Nicely evasive, Remus. Well done."
"Git." Her hand glanced off his shoulder with more playfulness than malice, but her eyes had drifted over to the vast grey pillars and elegant iron gates that waited just a few yards ahead of them. "But you do see why I'm nervous, don't you? This is the first time I've met your family…"
Remus shrugged slightly. "I didn't have any problems with yours."
Tonks laughed out loud. "Excuse me, you knew Sirius long before I did! And I had to hold your hand under the table the day we had dinner with my parents!"
"I never said that was because I was nervous."
The second blow was rather more forceful. "You're a git, Remus Lupin."
"I thought we'd already established that."
Tonks shook her head, curls bobbing playfully. "Remind me why I risked my life to save you again?"
Remus grinned outright. "We established that too. Because you're stupid."
"Do you want to walk in there with a bloody nose?"
"Do you want to greet my family for the first time with a bloody fist?"
"I might be willing to make the sacrifice."
But behind the banter and the hopefully fake threats, Remus could tell what feelings truly lingered within those dark eyes. Abandoning his playfulness, he reached out and gently pulled her into his arms, allowing his cheek to rest for a moment against the soft mass of pink that cushioned her head. Her chin burrowed into his shoulder.
"You'll know my father," he offered reassuringly. "And Rebekah, of course."
"Rebekah's coming?" Tonks' voice was muffled against the folds of his robes as she buried her nose into his neck. "I wasn't sure if she'd have time. She's been so busy cleaning house at the Institute…"
"She'd have been less busy if you hadn't demolished her ceiling."
A cold and suddenly much longer nose jabbed sharply against the tender skin of his throat. "That wasn't me."
Remus winced slightly at the painful pressure but nonetheless managed a chuckle. "Of course not. But this is a Lupin family gathering; Rebekah wouldn't miss that. And besides, she's finished all the hearings now. It's just a matter of paperwork and logistics."
"What was the verdict?" Tonks' muffled words were somewhat more subdued. "About the residents, I mean."
Remus sighed as he gently tightened his hold. "Obviously, the ferals on Level Six are staying where they are. They're too dangerous to be anywhere else and I agree with that."
"And the others?"
"Twelve have been deemed unsafe for release." Remus was proud of the level tone of his voice. That could have been me. That almost was me. There but for the Grace of God once more… "They'll stay in residence in the Institute. The rest have been given parole. They're free to live in the outside world as long as they spend their full moons at the Institute and report in three times a month at the Registry. Felisha's started a group for them to meet and discuss any difficulties they might be having adjusting. She's invited me to come along." He smiled wryly and with not a little hint of guilt. "However, I strongly suspect I'd get lynched on the spot."
He felt Tonks' arms tighten around him. "You can stop that right now, Remus Lupin. You can't help what happened and I'll be damned if I'm going to let you be miserable about it. War or not, you've got a second chance. And I'll make you enjoy it if it kills us both."
"That's very reassuring."
"Good." He felt Tonks pull a face against his neck. "And speaking of which…"
Remus chuckled once more. "Tonks' you've got nothing to worry about from my family. Trust me…" His mind darted back to the chaos of his first visit to Greystones, of Rufus' daft humour, Thalia's incessant chattering and Ruth's friendly smile all wrapped up in a house full of rushing children and a slightly batty dog. "You'll fit in just fine."
A heart-shaped face tilted up towards him. "You're sure?"
Softly, he reached down and captured her lips with his. "Utterly," he whispered softly. "I love you. So they'll love you too."
Tonks smiled. Her face brightened like the rising sun.
"Come on." One arm still wrapped snugly around her waist, Remus rested his head against hers and turned her towards the vast and imposing gates. In the distance, across the meadows, Greystones house gleamed invitingly in the beauty of the summer's day. The sound of young Lupins at play echoed on the breeze.
He smiled. She smiled.
And then, together, they pushed open the gates and walked inside.THE END The Imperius Annotations
Well, here we go with the Imperius Annotations. You might notice a slightly different approach this time around – rather than writing the story of the creation of this epic fresh, as I did last time, this time I shall be adding notes and annotations to the original typed up story plan preserved as it was just before I started writing this time last year by virtue of the fact I saved it onto a backup CD which I never saved over with the in-progress plot changes. :) The reason for this change in approach is simple – firstly, all by Oblivious notes were scribbled and scraps of paper and not typed and therefore couldn't be annotated online and secondly, I'm hoping it'll be quicker. :)
The bits in normal text are my original notes. The bits in brackets and bolded like (this) are my annotations. I tend to use initials a lot for conciseness in my notes but I'll put in a translation if it's needed. :) I hope you enjoy this insight into the twisted way my writing mind works. ;)
(My original title was Darkness of the Mind. I dropped it in favour of Imperius because it complimented Oblivious better)
Remus and Rey walking back down to WH (Winter Hollow)– find an anxious Moody at the cottage door – tells them they need to come – something…strange…has happened… (my original idea was to carry Imperius on from exactly where Oblivious left off, with Rey and Remus returning from their walk to find Moody waiting with news of what had happened at Kane's Kiss. But the scene was completely redundant and I quite simply couldn't be bothered to write it and liked the intro with Kingsley and the splinch better without it) CUT to One Month Later – Remus (stands outside for a moment of place he always fervently hoped he'd never see the inside of) (I do have a tendency to have ideas for thoughts and words for characters to say/think and build a scene around them. You'll see many examples of proto-versions of things that appeared in the fic around here) arriving at Feral Institute (with Tonks so that she can be taken as being Felisha?) (You'll notice as the fic goes on – in the original plan Tonks' role was somewhat…smaller… for reasons that will become clear soon!) for meeting with Rebekah Goldstein, thinking back as led inside about Dumbledore taking him aside and assigning this mission and why and what has happened to Kane.
PROLOGUE– An Auror spy in a seedy bar – overhears a conversation we don't hear – he's horrified – stumbles as tries to get out unseen, spotted and chased – attacked viciously – manages to apparate but splinches – Cut to Tonks perspective - his head and a few other parts appears in Ministry cells in front of Kingsley, Dawlish and Tonks – his parts left behind are being destroyed by pursuers, he manages to gasp out Death eaters- Imperius – werewolves- Feral Institute and then dies… (in the very, very beginning, the scene in the bar was Remus overhearing Peter but for reasons that shall become clear later, I both shunted Peter's role into secrecy and gave this job to the Aurors. The splinch idea came once Remus had been ruled out – I had intention of doing that to him! – but Dawlish and later Tonks were dropped to leave the scene in Kingsley's capable hands. Right up until writing it was to be Tonks and Kingsley staking out but I decided at the last minute to have one Auror only. I honestly can't remember what made me chose Kingsley over Tonks but I know I had a good reason.)
DEMENTOR/KANE – Dementor's kiss had a weird effect on Kane (see this in flashback, Moody waiting for Rey and Remus when they returned from walk to tell them, they come and see)(again this was cut – it proved unnecessary) – now locked up and being studied – believed that werewolves may have some kind of soul because feral Kane being ruled by his werewolf half, the Dementor therefore sucked that soul out of him and left the human one, Kane a gibbering wreck with the mind of a ten year old called Abel (still a werewolf changing every month but no wolf behaviour – keeps what's left of human mind)– Dementors cannot consume inhuman souls, the Dementor was consumed by the werewolf soul and collapsed into dust (Later I changed this to two inhuman souls for dramatic effect) - AT THE END – Remus uncovered and trapped with a Dementor – perhaps stopped behind (injured?) to hold it off whilst others escape – - nearly knocked out by flood of bad memories as Dementor goes to kiss him (cliffie!) (As you can see, I knew this one was coming from the start. It was one of three major primary ideas I had for this fic and both of the other two got dropped) he is put under the Imperius curse and his wolf surfaces – the Dementor eats the wolf soul and falls to dust (whoever casts curse is also thrown backwards and severely injured) – R(Remus) VERY ill. (I was determined that Remus would not just get up, shake his head and say – "Oh Gosh, that stung." I wanted the Kiss to have consequences though in the end I paired down what I had planned as a long illness to the eleven memory scenes) Later discovers wolf soul is gone – although still agonising transformation, now alone in his body – keeps human mind without wolfsbane at full moon.
COULD – have Dementor locked up as it has been taken over by feral mind (and therefore has a specific grudge against him) (I never mentioned this possible grudge due to the Dementor have Kane's wolf soul – indeed I admit I forgot all about it until now! But I suppose it could explain why it targeted Remus so specifically in that corridor, hmmm? ;)) – that's the dementor (being held and researched in same institute?) that gets free in chaos at end and attacks Remus – then when it gets two werewolves inside of it, they fight and the dementor is destroyed! (I really liked this idea. I still think it's funky…;))
(say in A/N not a fan of Remus miracle cure fics but this idea would not leave me alone – compromised at still changing but no longer wolf mind) (I'm not sure if I said this but I had no intention of making the Dementor's Kiss into a miracle cure for werewolves so I knew right from the start that the physical change would still happen as it always had – it was only the mind that was affected)
LOSE undercover plot (perhaps use another time) (Ah, the undercover plot. The first of the three original concepts I had for this fic and the first to fall by the wayside in favour of the werewolf conspiracy that later formed the backbone of Imperius. You'll find a summary of the idea I had at the bottom of this plan but basically it was that Remus went undercover with the Death Eaters by pretending to be feral to try and uncover an Order spy. I eventually dropped it because I just couldn't see Remus keeping up a convincing feral act without messing himself up mentally and also I couldn't see him being believed and accepted as a DE under any circumstances. Naturally, I was slightly flabbergasted when a very similar plot then appeared in HBP with the werewolves and Greyback!)
WEREWOLF CONSPIRACY – Dumbledore has received a message saying Voldemort-werewolf-Imperius (this plan, you might note, has different parts caught at different stages of development. This is because it evolved and changed as I went along but I didn't always change every reference to altered plot. Originally the message came to Dumbledore but then I adapted my by now discarded but sadly missed undercover prologue idea for Peter and Remus in a pub into the Auror scene instead and showed the spy dying first hand) – then spy died- that's all they know – asks Remus to investigate – it turns out that Rebekah Goldstein (chief werewolf researcher – at the feral institute - senior member of DFRCOMC, Rolphe's daughter) is under Imperius curse (one of assistants is a Polyjuiced or real DE?) (at this stage I had not written Peter back in) and being forced to experiment to find ways in which transformed werewolves can be controlled magically – Kissed Kane is the key as he can be imperiused (no wolf to drive it out) but has no wolfish instincts – like Imping a person – so can make wolf do whatever chose but not as naturally vicious (wondering if sucking out the human of a werewolf, make it pure feral and then can it be controlled too or is wolf mind too strong? That's why experiment) – the plan is to create a pack of controllable werewolves to do V's bidding. – POSSIBLE – Remus discovers its Rebekah Imped and who DE handler is but is caught and locked in a secure cell at FI with the other researchers on the verge of full moon and having not yet had his last dose of Wolfsbane (has it with him but DE smashes the vial). (Boy, did this idea open an epic can of worms…)
POSSIBLE (BLACKMAIL)– Encounter with Fenris and regulars from the Howling sent there after the bust (by single feral incident rule – as well as the nutters, many perfectly sane werewolves in the Institute!) POSSIBLE – Fenris or Friedrek(?) (I never did decide if Friedrek the Howling barman was actually a werewolf or not. I still haven't. But I chose Fenris for pathos in the end) recognises him and "outs" him as having been in the Howling several times. Rebekah threatens to lock him up? Remus explains there for DD (but not the Order, just doing "research") – Rebekah blackmails him (make Rebekah out to be villain – only discover later that she's been controlled the whole time and genuinely did want to help the ferals?) (I fiddled Rebekah later to make the hard edge at least more of a part of her – I didn't want her to come out from under the curse and suddenly be a puppy-hugging saint because I'd had such fun inventing all her antagonisms and besides her family would have noticed far more) – perhaps to get him to come to institute on full moon night? Sends an owl threatening to tell Rita Skeeter about his Howling visits if he doesn't come immediately. (I dropped this and skipped straight to the more potent threat of locking him up as a feral) (tells DD/Tonks about blackmail?) Remus tells them about this attempt at blackmail and tells Rebekah it won't work – then she turns around and says Friedrek told her of an unreported feral incident in his bar – attacked Kane, eyes distinctly yellow for a moment – and if he turned that easily, how many more times has it happened? Unless he does as she says and tells no one about this, she'll have him locked in the institute for life before he can blink… (I decided not to make the blackmail anything specific but more of a power game. I couldn't see Remus standing for it otherwise.)
DISGUISED DEATH EATER – The Death eater on site is Peter Pettigrew polyjuiced as Rebekah's wimpish assistant Cymone. (There is a pretty pathetic reason for using this name – Cymone is a weirdly spelled version of Simone and it was supposed to be a really, really obscure clue since Jesus' disciple Peter was also called Simon… Yeah, I know. But we authors need our sad little in jokes, thank you…;)) "Cymone" always avoids Remus – Felisha confides that she thinks she has a crush on him! MUST have other suspicious researchers about – OR could a different Death Eater be one of the WEREWOLVES???? Bellatrix a red herring! (This was the moment that Dolph came into being. As you can see, I was rather proud of that flash of inspiration! Originally the other DE in the place was going to be Bellatrix but I just couldn't see her being sane enough to keep her cover and I decided to try and falsely imply that Bellatrix was Rebekah instead) Cymone's hair is DYED blonde (this later changed to red) (roots show) – real Cymone's hair same colour as Rebekah's. (Yet another red herring in the making – the origin of the polyjuice hair)
FELISHA –the return of Felisha Hathaway, a magizoologist and involved in researching Kane's case (– first encounter with her at feral insitute, Remus thinks she's Tonks playing silly buggers until Tonks appears behind him, asking whats up, Remus runs) – developed fascination with werewolves when she worked out he was one (the bathroom incident – she accidentally saw him naked and saw the scar too, worked it out later) Both very embarrassed around each other still because of that but Felisha asks him to help on Kane case, start working together, romance – (Felisha – the second original idea for this fic – did survive and make it to the page, but not quite in the role I'd originally intended as this little footnote should imply. Yes, it's true; as several people did guess early on, I had originally intended for Felisha to be the romantic interest in this fic. And indeed, when I started writing, that intention had not changed. This is not because I did not enjoy R/T. I did, in spite of a person resolution never to ship anyone – I blame Lady de Mimsy and Fernwithy for writing such quality R/T fic and the characters themselves for independently developing such a fantastic chemistry in Oblivious without any intentional input from me! – but I was absolutely convinced it wouldn't happen in canon and since I try and keep as close to canon as I can in most respects, I'd decided to go OC for the romantic element. But then, while I was writing chapter 6 – indeed, if you read the first few chapters, you'll probably see the gentle setting up for R/F that I was doing! - a little snippit of a book called The Half-Blood Prince came out and completely blew my shipping ideas out of the water. And after a careful rethink, I decided to change the course of my ship and steer towards the new canon and the ship I'd been so fond of anyway. I do feel a bit sorry for Felisha, relegated as she was by one page of a novel from lead romance to friend and romantic red herring but I hope people still found her enjoyable as a character) Felisha the one to cast the Imperius? - Felisha at some point used as trap for Remus? (This came from the undercover plot and survived for a while into the new direction too – originally Remus didn't have a great deal to do with the Institute and worked on researching Kane's condition at Felisha's flat instead, which would have led to Felisha being used by her manicial boss to blackmail Remus when Felisha innocently let slip that they were seeing each other. This got dropped though when the idea of reintroducing Fenris occurred.)
Tonks as best mate, confidant, advisor – go out for drinks and chat – she gives him advice etc. (This was my original compromise for Tonks – I loved writing them so much as friends and the chemistry they had developed entirely accidentally in Oblivious and since I wasn't going to be able to use her romantically – so I thought – I opted to make her the best friend instead. This was handy as this early chumminess was easily evolvable when I steered my ship on a new course) We first learn about the Bathroom incident when she goads him into telling her the truth. (I later changed this to a private confession between Remus and Felisha because Remus refused to talk!)
Bathroom Incident – Remus bathing naked (had hurt his torso last full moon and trunks rubbed on healing scars) foolishly asked Sirius to stand guard until he was done – but instead Sirius saw Felisha, who he knew Remus had a crush on, pushed her inside and locked the door – Remus doesn't know how much she saw (no bubbles – they were stinging!) as he ducked under, just remembers the look of frozen horror on her face before she managed to turn around – R managed to get out, cover himself with his robe and then they both sat blushing at opposite ends of the room until Lily happened across them the next morning after forcing R's whereabouts from James. Now whenever see each other, all he thinks of is the look on her face, all she thinks of is what she saw! Both blush like mad and can't speak! He thought she was horrified couldn't bear to have it confirmed – she had realised what he was and didn't know what to say or how to bring it up…. (I have this story written out as a short fic idea. I may even get around to writing it someday, if I can ever work up the nerve to play with the Marauders!)
The Harry Incident! – Harry arrives at empty GP (left Dursleys in a huff early or Christmas hols? ) and finds werewolf Remus resting by the fire with a plate of sandwiches, a book(?) and music playing, under a yellow Mrs Weasley blanket! Or in his office? (I'll have to check my notes online because I'm sure I've said but I think this scene might have come from a dream. I loved it so much though I searched for a place to put it. It eventually ended up happening in Remus' Hogwarts office!)
FAMILY: Rey gets back in contact with Rolphe – awkward – Kane had killed Rolphe's first wife Megara and their son Randolph at their family home in Derbyshire – eventually both Rey and Remus invited back to the old homes in order to meet Rolphe's family – (Much of this plan was already written when Oblivious was completed and hence I managed to set this subplot up in the epilogue there. I originally invented this idea as a way to bring Rey, a character I loved dearly, into the story somehow, even if it was just as a cameo. But it was completely unconnected to the main plot and I really wanted to find a way to bind it in to the plot somehow. I had already drawn up a Lupin family tree and one day the idea occurred to make one of Rolphe's daughters the head of the Feral Institute trapped under an Imperius curse. This idea not only tied Rey's plot into Imperius, it also made even better sense of the title and gave the Institute a bigger profile. My original choice was the eldest daughter Ruth, but when I happened to look up Rebekah (who was already Anthony's mother long before her role was seriously expanded) in a name dictionary, I realised one definition was "bound, trapped" which seemed rather suitable under the circumstances! So Rebekah became not only the Institute's boss but another one of the author's secret and dodgy name jokes…;)) (don't know about Kane being relative) (This changed for necessary reasons later) – Anthony Goldstein is one of Rolphe's grandsons – first discover Rebekah is Rolphe's daughter when sees picture of her at Rolphe's house when invited over (possibly after she's started blackmailing him) (I turned this into a proper face to face confrontation. It seemed more fun that way).
POSSIBILITY – "Rebekah" kills Kane (he seems to die of natural causes) – Remus thinks its because he killed her mother but in fact it is because he was the DE test subject and it was her fight against the Imperius curse to thwart their research, In fact prompts then to put her aside and take over the facility. (I was developing quite a taste for red herrings at this stage!)
POSSIBILITY – Adolphus one of Kane's recruits imprisoned in the Howling raid? (I scrapped this and made Dolph rather more established in the Institute instead)
AFTERMATH – Rebekah and hence Rolphe very grateful, Remus recovers, he finally gets up the nerve to ask Leish out! (Naturally, this was dropped for obvious reasons. For one, Tonks would have gutted him…;))
Rolphe Lupin and Family
Other researchers: One male and nasty. (Arcadius Croll)
Zelia Phelan (an enthusiast)
Alexander Aylward (security chief)
Unwin Dempster (prejudiced)
Favian Haskell (quiet scholar)
(The specific characters of the Institute staff came as I wrote them. Croll was based on my hazy idea of the original head of the Institute, a smug, arrogant bastard. He did turn rather Snapey on me entirely by accident and I was going to make him Snape's cousin to explain the similarity but my beta said that made it look like he was intended to be a Snape clone and so I just made them old friends instead. Zelia was supposed to be young and bubbly but somehow she morphed into an older hippie-esque figure when I came to write her. Aylward was intended to a little more talkative but in the end his grimness worked quite well. I had worried I didn't have enough staff but it turned out that there were actually too many, hence Unwin was little more than a grouchy background character and Favian Haskell was abandoned altogether, at least by name. He was probably about though!)
Werewolf Death Eater – Adolphus (allowed around the compound due to Good Behaviour). (I later expanded this to his being the ombudsman to explain just why on earth even the best behaved werewolf would be allowed to just wander about! My scribbled annotation on my printed notes of this page reads – Dolph listed in Auror notes as expert caster of Imperius curse. I did a lot of scribbling on that print-out as ideas came!)
Ministry Spy – Jago Folke
Fridolf (peaceful wolf)
Ulric (power of the wolf)
Ulmer (fame of the wolf)
Botolph (messenger wolf)
(Ah, yet more name jokes. As you can probably see above, I found a lot of names meaning variations on wolf in my book of names though I never used more than a few of them. But the Institute staff names are also sad private jokes – though Arcadius Croll is a variation on the spelling of a name I saw in real life and knew I had to use, Zelia apparently means "zeal" and Phelan means "wolf" in Irish, Alexander Aylward means "man's defender" and "awesome guardian" which seemed appropriate for the security chief in a werewolf holding area and Unwin Dempster means "nonfriend" and "one who judges". Adolphus Mingan-Moritz, to give Dolph his full name, means "noble wolf" – perhaps not desperately appropriate but still – "gray wolf" and "dark". Folke means "people's guardian" which seemed appropriate for an Auror and Jago? Why, that's just a name I liked…;))
Fenris (real name Daniel Arden) (Yep, this also has hidden meaning – I'm sad like that when it comes to names. Arden means "ardent, fiery, burning with enthusiasm" as reference to his behaviour in The Howling and I chose Daniel as a reference to someone being thrown into a pit of wild beasts, as it were.)
Abraham Kane/Abel Isaacs
COULD – have Remus outside feral institute first – he and Tonks go inside and Remus considers the events that brought him here…. (This was expanded upon at the top)
-Moody and Rey (possibly cut this and have him discuss with Tonks instead
-Pensieve memory of Auror (I dropped the Pensieve memory because frankly it was something I'd already done and besides they could have just walked over and listened to the conversation they needed to hear and bang! No plot…;))
INSTITUTE LAYOUT (These were my cheat notes so I could keep track of just what was where, how many people there were and who was wearing what)
Ground floor – storage and laundry etc
First floor – werewolf transformation cages
Second floor – werewolf living area
Third floor – werewolf sleeping area
Fourth floor – Potions and research labs
Fifth floor – staff offices and archives
Sixth floor – top security prisoners and research subjects
10 support staff including chief caretaker (Dempster) – blue and grey robes
10 security officers (Aylward, Falconer, Selkirk) – red and grey robes
6 researchers (Goldstein, Croll, Hathaway, Phelan, Wrigley and Haskell) – white and grey robes
39 permanent residents and 5 top security prisoners – brown robes
POSSIBLE CHAPTER PLAN (When I wrote this plan, I thought I was being really, almost excessively generous in how much went into each chapter so as to avoid overwriting. Excuse me while I go and head-butt the wall for a moment…;))
PROLOGUE (cut this)
Moody meets Rey and Remus as they leave the woods
1: (I had real trouble with chapter titles in this fic. Most of them I made up when I saw which way the chapter was going rather than planning them out in advance as I did with Oblivious)
(February) (This changed to the end of March in the writing. Keeping track of the time of year proved a bugger. I'd lost it completely by the end so if anyone could let me know what time of year it was when the Institute was taken over to judge by my time jumps per chapter, you get a medal. I couldn't do it!)
Remus and Tonks standing outside the feral institute (describe) (The Institute, on the exterior at least, is a military base called Fylingdales on the North York Moors. I first spotted the ugly great thing in the distance riding on the very steam railway that often doubles as the Hogwarts express in the films and when I was trying to think of a good location for the Institute, it just sprang to mind!) Remus considering that this is the last place in the world he ever wanted to be (a werewolf's Azkaban) – Tonks beside him heavily disguised, remarks how friendly it looks, Remus shakes his head – says why is he here? Never wanted to be here – Tonks says he's here because the Order need him to be here – the security of the place is tight, can't just stroll in and ask to look around and he's the only one with an invitation – Remus face hardens, says he hasn't used that invitation for a reason – wanted to put it all behind him and let it rest in peace – he doesn't want to see him again – whatever state he's in – Tonks rubs his arm and says she knows – and that's why Dumbledore and everyone in the Order appreciate so much what he's doing – but this is just too important – they have to find out what Folke knew – if Voldemort (You Know Who) (This was a reminber to myself. I continually forget that Remus is one of the few people to actually use this name!) really is up to something in there… - Remus nods, says he knows – it just isn't going to be easy – Tonks nods and they start towards the door as Remus thinks over again the events that had brought him to this place he despises and yet again into the presence of the being that had once been Abraham Kane…
The Aurors mission
Tonks and Kingsley (I switched this all around, as you can see, opening on a more exciting first hand account of Folke's death and then following with the Remus and Tonks scene and scraping the need for the pensieve, any Order meetings and Remus doing extensive flashing back)
(do this meeting and the fact the last bit is a pensieve memory as reported speech- Remus thinking about it as he walks down the corridors of institute)
Emerge from pensieve of Kingsley's memory of event (DD, Minerva, Snape, Moody, Kingsley, Tonks and Remus) either GP or Hogwarts – discuss ramifications, what they know, ends with Remus being asked to accept a certain invitation he refused two months before… (I dropped this chapter completely. I was so proud of myself for saving the length rather than adding it…sigh)
3: THE FERAL INSTITUTE
1st visit to Feral Institute with "Undine" (Remus introduces Tonks as Undine on spur of the moment – she whispers to him afterwards "I have to hand it to you Remus. I didn't think it was possible to find a first name worse than mine but somehow, you've found one.") (Undine is a name I encountered at work. My colleagues and I came to the consensus that it was one of the worst names in the history of ever. I just had to use it under those circumstances…;)) , meet Rebekah (Rebekah pointedly does not offer to shake hands with Remus), Cymone and a few other researchers, see what has happened to Kane – Kane doesn't see him this first time?- and then comes across Felisha (This, I very much hasten to add, was a very rough version of a chapter plan. The larger details, such as Kane's child-like madness, and just how Remus bumped into Felisha were expanded upon in later notes that I worked from on a chapter by chapter basis and then mostly deleted as I went, expanding on the detail as I wrote and or ideas came to me. Apart from a few print-outs that are God-knows-where, those, alas, are lost to posterity)
4: AT THE THREE BROOMSTICKS (This chapter title was possibly the most mobile. It was attached to four different chapters over the course of the fic!)
Drink with Tonks, discussing what happened and his history with Felisha.
(also reported speech about reporting in about his findings – asked to go back and scout out the researchers more…) – happens across Harry and co when goes back to Hogwarts – he has overheard some of what he and Tonks saying? Hermione remembers Goldstein book from Oblivious (this was the origin of Harry and his friends' nosiness regarding Remus' activities, though I brought the invisibility cloak into play to avoid Remus and Tonks looking as though they were discussing Order business where anyone could hear. The old annotation on the printout has Harry snooping as Remus reports to Minerva but the way I chose seemed easier. Also, it was here, as I'm sure you can see, the rot began. By adding Rey into this chapter, it turned into two chapters instead)
(The rot expands. I decided to do the chat with Felisha before the visit rather than after and again, it earned its own chapter. Needless to say, I could already see the ominous clouds of doom gathering over my careful planning and boy did they thunder after this…;)) Second visit to FI – talks to many researchers – is seen and taken to be Rey by Kane – Kane imped (Imperiused) by Reb and Remus realises he's vulnerable– meet Adolphus and Zelia - talks with Felisha afterwards and agree to try and act like grown ups around each other from now on. (Gods, this conversation was tough to write. I don't know what it was but I had terrible trouble getting a decent chemistry going between Felisha and Remus. I think I managed okay in the end but this was the last chapter I wrote before HBP struck. In a way, it was rather a relief to turn back to a chemistry I didn't have to work at! And speaking of which, a chapter I wrote not long after after HBP was the Tonks pov "A Little Entertainment" into which I sowed my first hints of the new ship I was sailing. The whole thing was unplanned and mostly off the cuff, since I'd intended to have Tonks report her activities to Remus on the walk back – they ended up having an explanation chat on the train. Indeed, I wrote the chapter "Back and Forth" with Kane taking Remus for Rey before it and then went back to write Tonks' chapter when the reported speech seemed like a cop out. I knew that I would need her pov later – ironically, I didn't end up using it where I'd originally planned, you'll see why further on – and wanted to try it out. It was tough at first after writing as Remus but I think I got the hang of her. :) Oh and the nervous twitch toilet escape was my beta's idea. I just had her asking where the toilet was…;))
Lesson with the kids (Friday) – Harry reveals he knows something's going on again but Remus puts him off – tells him it really doesn't concern him (I took this opportunity to insert the scene with Harry bursting in to "rescue" his professor and finding him wolfish, wrapped in a blanket and reading a book. It seemed the right place. :) I carried the Trio's nosiness and chat with Remus into the next chapter. By now, I knew I was doomed!)
Later, on Sunday at home with Rey, he reveals he has, as asked, made contact with Rolphe – they have both been invited to a family meal in two weeks time.
Third visit to FI (I hadn't intended to out Rebekah's "motives" for disliking Remus regarding Anthony as I did here in the chapter that became "The Worst Kind of Hypocrite" It was originally planned to happened right at the start, in the second chapter on the way to see Kane, but I quickly realised that was way to soon and cut and pasted the start of that conversation to here, where I expanded it, overly as it turned out, into a new chapter.)– meet Unwin – (originally Remus visited the resident's level with Rebekah's permission but in the writing I just couldn't see that happening so I had them sneak in instead. That sneaking grew into the chapter "At The Gate" which was supposed to be a quick interlude into "Cabin Fever" but of course, that didn't work out…;) The hatch I invented literally on the spur of the moment – I knew I would need a laundry hatch to tip Remus down later and establishing it now seemed a nice set up. It was also here where I first had the spur of the moment idea of using Felisha, the rejected love interest, as a possible suspect by delaying her arrival so that she could have been the one to raise the alarm) encounters Fenris who "outs" him as having been to TH in front of Rebekah (The other werewolves, including Thor and Censermealia, were on the spot inventions. The name Censermealia was yet another I nicked from work. My beta thought I'd made it up!) – Felisha asks to meet him elsewhere (suspicious of things)
8: (The reason for the postponement of the family dinner that appeared here in the chapter I actually ended up calling "At The Three Broomsticks" was that your humble author had messed up her dates regarding the full moon and had to make a hasty correction! The Hermione scene was also an on the spot improvisation when I realised Remus had no way to communicate with Felisha without sending owls and that would have been blatantly obvious for a secret alliance)
Meets Felisha with Tonks, she tells him her concerns - – Felisha also confides that she's worried something strange is happening here – Rebekah behaving quite oddly lately and also many of the werewolves here don't deserve to be – but daren't say anything… (tease Remus about nicknames?) – Felisha's naked comment! (have a quiet talk and discuss their embarrassment – decide to behave like adults and be friends – silly to be awkward – as leaving Felisha says that from now on she won't look at him and picture him naked – just as a silence falls – everyone stares – felisha goes scarlet and flees leaving a blushing Remus to headbutt the doorframe – Tonks, who was at the bar, taps his shoulder and remarks that that went well…. (I later shifted this conversation to a private room because frankly a secret meeting shouldn't take place in a bar but I did maintain this embarrassment by giving poor Remus an audience of passing students instead! This is also the time to admit that Felisha's urgent panic at the split of this chapter that became a small cliffie? Ummmm…. When I wrote it, I hadn't a clue what she was panicked about. The chapter was getting too long and I needed a good split. The feral Dementor stuff was an improvisation to cover for myself the next day but it saved a lot of explanations later in the long run!)
-conversation as walk back
"Why are women so impossible to understand?"
"You don't count. I don't consider you as a woman."
"You're not helping your case, Lupin."
"I meant you're my friend. You don't confuse me in the same way."
"I'm not sure if that's good or bad."
"Oh, it's good, believe me. Why don't the rest if your gender just say what you mean?"
She ruffles his hair
"Because we wouldn't get to see the adorable looks of confusion on your little faces!"
"I take it back. You are a woman."
"Most of the time anyway. Except when duty compels me to take my drag act on the road."
(I ended up moving this whole duel to after the family dinner because it seemed a more appropriate time for Remus to be attacked in the evil scheme of things and gave impetus to the raid) Tonks notices that someone has been watching them in the pub and offers to walk Remus back to the gates (she can apparate from there) (this conversation ended up being expanded upon and inserted two chapters earlier when I realised that they wouldn't have walked back but were far more likely to just apparate!) on the way, spot figures watching them, Tonks pretends to trip and whispers in their ear – they are ambushed, big duel – Remus hit with cruciatus, but walks through it - Harry, Ron and Hermione intervene (they were visiting Hagrid) (I switched this to the Quidditch team – people circling on brooms are more likely to see a battle on the other side of a big wall than those on the ground) then Hagrid and DD (Dumbledore) appear to and the ambushers disapparate – Tonks comments that you always know you are onto something when someone tries to kill you (Yet another scene that got carried away and ended up being cliffied to compensate. You see, I'm not intentionally evil on the cliffie front, most of them were spur of the moment to cut off an overlong chapter! Originally the lead Death Eater was literally just a random Death Eater but that seemed a bit of a cheat so I made it Dolph in hindsight. But the trouble was – why wouldn't they have seen his beard under the mask? That's when a comment from SnorkackCatcher at COS gave me the idea to make it Aylward under the Imperius and thus it became when I explained it later. I really wanted to give Remus a duel in this fic because if the DoM and HBP prove anything, he must be an awesome dueller to walk out of both fights unscathed. Besides, I wanted to try out my short spells theory and I went playing on an online Latin dictionary to find good curses for him to use. I also never intended for Tonks to get hurt as you can see by the fact she got the quip I later gave to Kingsley but the chapter was running long and yet again I needed a dramatic moment. Plus it made a good catalyst from Remus to notice his feelings for her…)
The Family Dinner – meets Rolphe and extended family – threatened by Rebekah regarding TH (The Howling)– says he is to keep his nose out or she'll have him arrested and locked up in the institute so fast it'll make his head spin…(possibly make this two chapters, one ending of Reb's arrival and the other on news of Kane's Death) (I was bowing to the inevitable by this stage as you can see. The Lupin family were all mapped on a family tree but their characters came as I wrote them. This chapter is possibly the most fun I had in writing this fic – I loved the creating the Lupins and their little jokes and bickers. Several of them are based on members of my own extended family…;))
Remus receives word from Felisha that Kane is ill – goes to facility and he dies (This got bumped so as to end a chapter. As a last hurrah, I gave Kane a little pov scene of his own. He'd been such a great character I couldn't just kill him offstage) – Felisha discovers he's been poisoned and made to look natural – Remus suspects Rebekah may have done it as revenge – Remus asks Anthony about his mum – he says she didn't come home for Xmas (very unusual) – he's hardly seen her lately (I scraped the chat with Anthony. Remus had got everything he needed on that front from Ruth)
(The duel comes here in the actual fic. The rumours were a humorous interlude I couldn't resist injecting here while Remus was in the hospital wing) Remus consults with DD and Order – elect to break in and see what they can find out – R and T chosen, over protests of Snape and Moody, also drafts Felisha in to help – she gives them a portkey to take them inside and out in spite of wards – it's used in emergencies by the staff…
They break/portkey in – find Polyjuice ingredients – rush out again… (Felisha says she hasn't seen Rebekah all morning – not like her not to show up… (Tonks has portkey when leave) (Ah, yes. You might observe a small difference to the way this couple of chapters turned out. Since this was literally all I'd come up with to work with on this chapter so far, I had a good think and decided for excitement's sake to have Remus and Tonks locked in a room for a bit. But what to do with them while they were trapped in there? Well, perhaps a heart to heart, the first open acknowledgement of their feelings? That might be good… These musing turned into "Epiphany" which went far further on the chat about feelings front than I'd intended but knowing Remus was about to be abducted, it occurred to me that just before an enforced separation might be a good time to ratchet up the angst quotient. Originally this chat went even deeper into reasons but my beta said it was too much too soon, so I cut half the conversation and inserted it later in Zelia's lab where I originally intended the first confession leading to first kiss to be)
Remus takes it back to Hogwarts whilst Tonks goes to brief the Order – gets Snape to confirm it is indeed Polyjuice (he gives R his WB whilst he's there) – both go to find DD only to be told by MM that he isn't there – called to emergency session of WG because BL has been arrested. (This I actually managed to compress into the next chapter. I'm so proud!)
MM says they can't afford to attract suspicion – says they'll go to meet the Order after dinner - During Great Hall dinner, Hagrid rushes in saying he tried to stop them – it's one of the FI researchers and WCU members, here with arrest warrant for Remus Lupin – proof that he has been to subversive werewolf club TH on more than one occasion and that have eyewitness proof that had a feral incident whilst there – try to arrest him, M tries to intervene but nothing can do – R taken (see ENDING for later chapter breakdown.) (I did have fun writing Minerva's rant at the Werewolf Capture Unit men – another one of my beta's fine ideas - but I have to admit, much to my irritation, this chapter was the start of a long difficult period of writing for me. Perhaps it was because I'd planned the long run at the end before the beginning and had such a vivid idea of it that it was hard to live up to; perhaps it was because I was so tired from work and not feeling at my best at the time. But whatever the reason, chapters I had looked forward to writing became a real slog. I very much hope this didn't show in the writing but unfortunately this part of this fic does not raise happy memories of easy writing…:()
14 – 22 – FINALE CHAPTERS – perhaps have Tonks trapped inside as well? Or involve Harry and the kids – have them go after Remus perhaps and get stuck inside as well? (This shows you just how much things changed with the ship change and as I wrote. When I first planned this section, it was only Remus and Felisha trapped inside. Indeed Felisha stayed on the raiding party right up until the actually writing of the chapter where they became trapped.)
ENDING – (I wrote this as a plot plan like those at the beginning but later transferred it to the chapter plan wholesale. That's why some of the plot repeats itself here) Remus becomes suspicious after Rebekah tries to blackmail him (perhaps she thinks he's seen a file that he hasn't, or knows something he doesn't – perhaps he tried to bluff information out of her?) – persuades Felisha to sneak him inside the institute (she says hasn't seen Rebekah all morning – not like her not to show up) and breaks into her office. He finds incriminating documents about her Imperius and other illegal control research on werewolves and then finds a vial of polyjuice potion and a clump of hair (Cymone and Rebekah MUST have the same hair colour!) – rushes back to Hogwarts to tell DD – meets Minerva in the entrance hall, asks where DD is, she says hasn't he heard? Bellatrix Lestrange has been arrested – DD has been called to an emergency session of the Wizengamot. Remus accepts this, tells Minerva to get Severus, he has important info when suddenly WCU operatives enter along with one of lesser researchers from Feral Institute (must have a not at all nice one) (Ah, the beginnings of Croll. I created him to do this job) – he announces that Remus is under arrest regarding an unrecorded Feral Incident in the werewolf club The Howling (in front of half the school!) – Minerva tries to stall or stop it but nothing they can do, Remus taken away and locked up (the day before full moon – Remus does raid then because won't be expected to work)(I later changed this to the morning of the full moon because I couldn't believe the Order was the slow to react) (14) Felisha comes to see him says she doesn't know what's going on – the arrest order is Rebekah's but no one can find her to confirm it – she risks her career to try and sneak him out – has a vial of wolfsbane for him (I scrapped the wolfsbane to make the impact of the later revelation stronger) – but before he can drink it, are found by "Cymone" – (you might notice the lack of Avin here. That's because at this stage he didn't exist. I invented him later, using the young man Falconer I'd made off the cuff in the second chapter, to both give Felisha a link to security and as compensation for taking Remus off her ;)) (15)Felisha tries to persuade Cymone to help them escape and she seems to agree – (I inserted the Dementor here as yet another chapter splitter cliffie, adapting the chapter slightly to turn Remus' twitchiness into early warning. I also invented the candles because I needed a way to knock a roomful of people out without leaving evidence of a fight!) takes them to a chute that she says is used for laundry and will take them to laundry room and out – they thank her – (since Remus knew the chute was suspicious, I changed this later) are about to climb down when she cries "Accio wands" and shoves them down – they tumble into a confinement cell and the overhead bars clang shut – all the other researchers are locked in the room, including to their shock, a battered and shaken Rebekah ( I was bad at spotting dramatic moments to stop these chapters when I made this plan, wasn't I? Ah well, I got it sorted on the fly…;)) .who they discover has been held under the Imperius curse apparently by "Cymone" – real Cymone in there too unconscious? She says she did kill Kane – but not as revenge but in a rebellion against the research – he was their only suitable test subject – but her actions prompted them to act sooner. Remus finds his vial of wolfsbane is smashed – he's locked in a room full of people with the moon due to rise in a couple of hours – he's frantic, says before the moon rises, one of them will have to kill him…. (16) Tonks POV (the Tonks chapter expanded into several Tonks' chapters interspersed with Remus' chapters and I'm glad they did – it gave her a bigger role in the fic and I'm glad of that)– trying to find out what's happened to Remus – chasing around – at Hogwarts speaks to trio– decides to go up to FI and see what she can find – takes Felisha's portkey -about to go when Harry and co insist they want to come too – Tonks says absolutely not – activates portkey, feels her robes being grabbed and lands in a heap with trio (and Ginny?) (I dropped Ginny. Way too many cooks about spoiling that broth…)– lands on portkey and breaks it – charm broken so can't send them back – inside the institute and swarming with DEs – Tonks angry but tells them to say close to her and they set out…(17 Then suddenly a rope slithers down and hear a voice calling them – Tonks! ) (As you might be able to tell from this abrupt cut, the idea of having a Tonks chapter at all was a late addition. Originally she just showed up out of the blue! Also, the idea of Rebekah actually trying to kill Remus at his request was another on the spot invention. I had some good ones, didn't I:)) Minerva called the Order to say what happened but with Kingsley caught up in the Lestrange case – she came down to see what she could find out only to find the gates locked – snuck around and saw a couple of known DEs outside. She's put in a call for back up but was worried about Remus at FM so knocked out and disguised herself as one of the DEs and snuck in (this was clearly a pile of pants of an idea. Hence her having the portkey…)– she overheard a DE saying an "accident" had been arranged for the researchers – the new mad feral brought in today was going to have escaped and killed them all. They all climb out – Trio and Ginny present – Remus asks why the hell they are there, Tonks explains then says something big is going on – place is swarming with DEs – Remus says its more important they get out and wait for backup – gives him Wolfsbane – (note the anticlimax here. I corrected that somewhat…;)) start to sneak out but then wash of cold – dementors! (I dropped the Dementors to downstairs. Having them just wander about seemed counterproductive) – (18)they hide and overhear Cymone and to their astonishment one of the werewolves talking (I chose to do the reveal on Dolph earlier, since Rebekah would have obviously mentioned it and by doing it through Tonks, it was more dramatic) - Remus realises what they are planning to do – they are going to feed the ferals that still have human minds to the dementors and then set a controllable werewolf army loose on the wizarding world - (commenting on how it shouldn't be much longer until Cymone's polyjuice wears off – she says I hope so, being a woman has turned him funny! Makes some joke and Remus realises - PETER (Aha. The big reveal…;) I wasn't sure about writing Peter, he's such a difficult character to get to grips with. I couldn't make him all weasel-ish weed or why would the Marauders have ever been friends with him? But at the same time, he is a coward and a traitor…)– (19 (have to hold Harry back!) )Felisha says (By this stage I had swapped Felisha for Rebekah. I was fairly ruthless to poor Felisha in these later stages – her character was originally major back here but ended up kind of fizzling out as Rebekah and Tonks usurped her plot. The problem was I didn't have time or plot left to use her any better. I felt bad but it was necessary and she had been a big help previously after all so it's not like the character was a waste) there's a magical override on the institute in case of a break out – if they can activate that – nothing and no one will be able to get in or out of the Institute until midday tomorrow – it has a time delay to allow the setter to escape down a passage – they manage to set it off and they and researchers make a run down the passage (I later made this safety device more of a threat to create a race against time. I strongly suspect in real minutes that the time had elapsed long before I said it did, but what the hell – that's fic!) – Tonks leading, Felisha at back helping Remus NO WANDS! (This was to remind myself that their wands had been taken. I'd forgotten Tonks would have hers!) – almost out when suddenly the change takes hold of Remus – Tonks starts to come back – Remus shouts at her and Felisha to go but the door slams down – he and Felisha sealed inside(when full moon rises building fills with shrieks and howls)…. (Again… note the tiny, tiny differences. For one, a certain massive angst filled conversation is conspicuously absent. It's present in a few rough annotations on the print-out but originally of course, it was all about Remus and Felisha and Tonks wasn't even inside when the door slammed down, let alone the Trio. It was only at this late stage, writing this scene for real that Felisha got cut and left behind the door – the scene was just too busy already. The reason I waited so long was that she was intended to have something very important to do – a job that I, for angst reasons, switched to Tonks at the last minute. I imagine you can guess what I mean!) (20)DEs chasing them – have to run, chase in corridors, manage to lock the dementors in a room (with the DEs) but those wolves like Kane that are already vulnerable are set free (I left the werewolves caged. Death Eaters are not that stupid and the Kiss wouldn't happen until morning anyway) – not under DE control – rogue DE werewolf hunts them – manage to kill somehow (Note the quite astonishing vagueness here. This turned out to be quite a pit I had to dig myself out of in terms of working out what actually happened that night! This led to Death Eater battles in a werewolf chamber, Remus and Dolph falling down a lift and Tonks getting buried under a ceiling. I also took Dolph's fate out of their hands to make it more poetic. Not bad for a few really, really vague words!) – encounter a now himself Peter who turns into a rat and vanishes into the woodwork(21) – chases in corridors survive until morning when Remus changes back, weak and exhausted –only need hold out a few more hours until spell lifts (Felisha finds their wands) but then suddenly Peter appears – tells Remus he's sorry, didn't want to do this – he was always the Marauder that treated him best but has to be done – he unlocks a door, rats and scarpers, out comes Feralised Dementor (I felt the need to corner Peter rather more for this scene to work. The forgiveness idea is annotated but only came quite late on when I was plotting his motivations) – Remus too weak to run, tells Felisha to go - The Dementor-Cliffie! (As you can see, this had loomed large in my mind for some time…;)) (22) Hears cry of Imperius – feels wolf rise as Dementor clamps down, hears Leish scream (You might observe a slight change of protagonist on the Imperius cursing front – it was Felisha not Tonks but the reasoning for the choice was the same when I wrote this) – Dementor suddenly reels back and combusts as two wolves fight for dominance, Remus catches a glimpse of Felisha bleeding an unconscious before everything fades out….Shift to perspective of Tonks, finds them both almost dead and dementor remains – catches Peter! Takes them to hospital…..AFTERMATH….:) (Now, this was where I originally intended my only other Tonks POV to be. But as it turned out, I had to switch to Kingsley!)
23 – Remus wakes up in hospital – feels strange –told what has happened and though still a ww – wolf mind is gone – Felisha still very ill (As you can see, a few changes here! The idea of Remus' mind resetting and running through his life three years at a time occurred in bed late on the night before I was intending to write this scene. I forced myself to wake up and scribble down the good idea before it was gone and the next morning I got down to it. Originally, as I said at the time, I wrote it in alternating scenes between Remus and Rey but at my beta's suggestion, I split the two. The Remus scenes stayed almost exactly as they were but I created many new scenes to expand the alternative perspective, including the two scenes at Greystones and the bit from Rita's perspective. The rest had mostly existed before, although I greatly expanded on Harry's scene and the Rita trap. :))
24 – meets Rolphe and Rebekah properly – sees his father – Felisha still ill (I always intended to leave Felisha/Tonks in hospital much longer than Remus to really lay on the guilt, but in the end I preferred to have them wake up the same day)
25 – back at school though F still in hospital – several months maybe – FI been overhauled and examined – Rebekah trying to get things on a proper track– calls in to see F and she comes round – finally asks her out? (Yes, my intention for Remus and Felisha's romance was that slow moving. By the last chapter, he asks her out. Aren't you glad I switched to Tonks instead? She'd never have put up with such faff and indeed she didn't. When I first switched, their romance was going to wait until the last chapter too. But it just kept advancing forward to Zelia's lab and then "Epiphany" because Tonks just wouldn't have it…;))
DROPPED: (And here, finally, is the undercover plot that didn't quite make it…)
(Opening chapter, (beginning of summer) two figures in an obscure bar, (Remus and Pettigrew but don't say this straight away- only refer to Lupin as the werewolf and don't overtly reveal who he is) Peter approaches Remus, Remus says it took him long enough – was expecting him or one of his kind months ago – Peter admits they've been watching him since Sirius' death and the business with Kane – noticing how he's been spending more and more time in places like this – received intelligence that he's argued and fallen out with other Order members (fed from Snape)– Remus says he's tired of the war, tired of being the good one, tired of behaving and trying to conform to human standards (glint of yellow in his eyes) – wants to do something for himself – Peter says they could help with that – gives him a way to get in touch if he decides and leaves hurriedly – Remus leaves too and meets Tonks outside (no names until now. "Remus Lupin smiled." She asks how Peter was, Remus says "Gullible." (he should be a bit uncomfortable though) (This scene was the distant inspiration for what became Folke's death. I felt sorry to lose it but it couldn't have fitted anywhere in my new plans)
UNDERCOVER - Remus tries to go undercover with DEs by pretending to be going feral – starts spending time in obscure bars etc, Snape feeds in info that he's argued with DD and friends a lot and been out of sorts, though hides it well at the school to keep his job – a member of the Order is believed to be under the Imperius curse and feeding info to VD unwillingly – R's job is to find out who but only he and DD know about this part of the mission, everyone else who knows (only Tonks, Snape and Moody who DD believes are all clean) believes just undercover - R chosen because only one who can't be Imperius'ed. (turns out to be false information – are in fact getting info from portrait of Mrs Black who has a second picture at the Malfoys OR Imperiusing Snape and using him as a double agent but wiping his memory of it) Remus also takes wolfsbane on these missions which makes him a bit sick at that time of month but prevents any recurrence of feral incidents under stress.) (This was the basic summary of what Imperius could have been. It later changed out of all recognition, as I'm sure you noticed, until this plot just didn't have a place. And since HBP, I doubt I'll use it now – parts of it just ran JKR too close again…;))
Well there you have it. The story of the Evolution of Imperius from start to finish. I hope you found it interesting and enlightening and once again thanks for reading:)