Authoress' Ramblings:

Ohoho… I'm full of inspiration lately and it's all about angsty stuff… especially Flame of Recca fan fic with my favorite pairing: ToFuu! Hehe… To be honest, I used to support RaiFuu very much, but then, changed into ToFuu, which I think is a lot better than RaiFuu. I mean, Raiha is way too old for Fuuko, don't you agree? Well, no more ramblings or delays… On with the story, please review whether you like it or not, and enjoy… Dozo…

Keys:

"…" speeches

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Beyond Words

by: Shikaido Yuki

I opened my mouth, but closed it again. It was way too early to confess my feelings towards her. Way too early. We hardly knew each other… although that wasn't perfectly true. I mean, we were in this gang, called The Hokage; and she always poked me in the head, or kicked me… or slapped me till I bleed… except those circumstances, we were actually best friends.

Our friendship became closer after we won the final battle in SODOM, but soon, we chose different paths of our lives. I went to Tokyo University after finishing High School, a year early before them because I am their senior. A year later, Fuuko, surprisingly, joined me here. Yanagi who, as I expected to be here, chose to earn a scholarship in America, which was better. Recca went to a nearby college, studying really hard so that he can go to join Yanagi in America for his master degree (he took History for his major, talk about strong memory). And Domon… let's say he became a professional wrestler, and won many belts already, but still not very famous.

I was reaching the age of twenty-one at the moment, almost finishing my terms. It was so fast for me because I took all day school. I didn't have a part-time job. The money I earned when I was in high school was enough to fulfill my needs for at least six years or more. After finishing college, I of course, would work. I loved working, and missed it already. Studying all the time starting to make me boring. Beside, although my earnings in my junior high until high school enough for six years straight… I still needed more. Six years IF nothing bad happened, like sickness or accidents. But something had eventually happened, something real bad, so I needed money – fast. The longer I postponed, the longer was my life at stake. And I wanted to survive, I wanted to live. I wanted to see her smile.

Kirisawa Fuuko. Amazing girl, who was once quite a tomboyish, was now… quite a lady.

"Mi-chan?" her angelic voice ran through my dusty mind. I immediately snapped out from my daydreaming, smiling sheepishly – whoops, wrong thing to do, Mikagami, I thought to myself.

"Why are you smiling?" she said, suppressing giggles that were about to came out from her mouth.

Because you're so beautiful, I was about to answer, but then, replied, "Nothing, Monkey. Now are you going to be stunned just like that or what? People are watching, you know." My coldness took over me. I couldn't possibly be a romance junkie and let all people know about my feelings – true feelings – towards Fuuko, right?

"Monkey! I'm not a monkey, for the one thousand five hundred and seventy-eighth time!"

"So you remember, huh," I retorted sarcastically.

"Who doesn't," she said. I could saw her grip became tightened on her Law, Master to Master book that her nails became white. I had said something real bad to her, I realized, and she was pissed. But then again, Fuuko had become quite a feminine lady, she wouldn't kick or punch me now. Ha. Ha.

"Why are you following me?" I asked after a while of silence between us. I wasn't angry or furious at all, confused would be the word, and I meant it. Why was she following me? We had different classes, different majors too. Was she daydreaming?

"W-Why? Wh – " she stuttered, her face looked horrified. "Oh dear."

I was trying to death not to laugh. She'd be more pissed if I do that, although that was exactly what I wanted. Fuuko looked so CUTE when she was pissed off.

"Why in the hell am I following you!" she shrilled.

"That's exactly the question I asked you just – " I glanced at my watch, " – three seconds ago."

"I'm having a class with Mr. Victor! Oh my God! He's the blabbering teacher who doesn't stop talking until the world ends!" she shouted to herself panicky, then glanced at her Guess? watch (she was quite fashionable, not to mention fabulous nowadays) in the stare of utmost horror, "and the class started three minutes twenty-seven seconds ago!"

"What are you doing here, then?" I asked her. Obviously, my question was quite right. "Go! Run like a wind!"

She nodded, and rushed towards Mr. Victor's class – with high-heels at the height about ten centimeters at least and ankle-length purple skirt.

…unfortunately (and obviously), she tripped over by her own skirt and fell on the floor with a loud 'thud'. She surely had earned a sprained, or worse, broken ankle.

I didn't know what got over me, but I soon found myself helping her out to the Infirmary. I hoped that NO ONE, no one watched us. Maybe I'd die in embarrassment the moment I went out from the Infirmary.

"Are you alright? Can you walk?" I asked her, VERY concerned.

"I'm OK, I don't need your help," she retorted, trying to stand up, but failing. "Ouch, ouch, ouch…" she groaned, holding her ankle slightly.

"I'll take you to the Infirmary," I said to her clearly, moving her right arm around my neck and gripped a hold at her small waist. Have I ever told you that he had the curviest body? Get a hold of yourself, Tokiya, I told myself. I was trying not to blush.

"WHAT! NO! No! You'll be late too! No!" she panicked.

"Your safety is more important, especially that you're an old friend of mine. And missing the class for once is quite OK, I have a friend and I can borrow his notes."

"BUT! No, Mi-chan – "

"Since when do you refuse my help?" I interrupted, still walking with her arm around my neck to the Infirmary. Actually, she always refused my help, but carry on…Luckily, class had already started so practically, nobody was there, except us.

"Since – " she paused and blinked twice, "I guess I got too carried away. Sorry, and thanks for your help."

"That'll do it, now walk carefully…"

I managed not to blush and got her to the Infirmary.

To my realization when I got there, I was perspiring. I hoped dear to God that she wouldn't pass out smelling my scent. But I wasn't filling the air with foul odor, you know. I had my trusty deodorant and I don't smell that bad. I actually think I have never been smelly.

"What happened?" asked the doctor over there, helping Fuuko to get onto bed immediately.

"Her ankle," I replied shortly.

He examined Fuuko's ankle carefully, and told us its condition, "It's broken, I'm afraid. You'll have to go to the nearest hospital. It won't do here, I'm not exactly a doctor. I'm just a trainee and I don't have the nerves to put any bandaged onto it coz it looks pretty bad."

"Trainee?" I repeated, "I don't remember that they put any trainees in the Infirmary. Who are you?" I asked suspiciously. I didn't like the situation and I had this great feeling that he was a criminal. I hadn't lost my touch and I could sense real danger. This was one kind of the situations.

"Mi-chan…" Fuuko whispered weakly from the bed, trying to get up. I approached to her immediately and took her in my arms bride-style. Then, I rushed to the door.

Before I, nor Fuuko, could reach the doorknob, I felt sharp pain on my back. The pain immediately trilled down to my spine and my vision started to blur.

He knows my weakness, I thought, gasping for air. I glanced at Fuuko. She was shocked, her eyes seemed terrified.

And before I lost consciousness, I could hear her calling my name, "Mi-chan!"

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I smelled some kind of strawberry scent the moment I started to regain consciousness. I tried to sprang open my eyelids, but my head protested in pain. I tried to open them slowly, then.

A vision of blurred purple was the only thing I could saw. When my eyes had adjusted to the sudden light, I saw Fuuko. She was smiling at me. I thought I just saw an angel…

"F-Fuuko?" I asked rather surprised, then tried to sit, but another pain jabbed my spine.

"Lay down," she said lovingly (wow, was I imagining that?), and put her hands onto my shoulder to push me down to bed again.

"W-What happened? Who took me here?" I questioned her. I could saw that she had two large sticks under her armpits to make her stand. And further down, I saw that her broken ankle was in plaster cast. I was relieved for the first time of the day, she had been treated correctly.

"Well, when the fake doctor kicked your back and you lost consciousness, I screamed so loud that almost the whole faculty could hear me. On top of that, I hit and kicked him with my healthy parts of the body," she explained cheerfully, "he had been taken care of and carried to the police station, no need to worry. And the teachers helped us to get here. We should thank them the moment we enter college again and perhaps the soonest is… in another two weeks. We obviously need rest, don't we?"

"Yea, obviously," I said. I wondered if she'd known about my illness…?

"Why did you collapsed anyway? Even I wouldn't collapsed if my back was kicked. And he didn't give much of his strength too. What happened?"

Oh… that was the question I feared the most. How in the hell was I suppose to answer that?

"Nothing… I guess it's because I haven't worked out or even gone to the gym for at least four years," I lied.

"But that – "

The door suddenly swung open and a doctor came in. Let's just hope that this one wasn't fake, OK?

"I'm afraid I have a disturbing news for you, Mr. Mikagami," he said in a thick British accent. He was speaking English, everyone at the college was, so we didn't have any difficulty with a foreign doctor at the hospital.

"What is it?" Fuuko said, forehead frowned.

"Your – "

I raised my hand so that he would stop reading the report, and he did. He had questioning look placed upon me and Fuuko.

"I know," I said to him. "I know about that. You don't have to tell me again. I come here at least five days a week, don't you remember me? I knew almost all doctors here."

"Err… I'm new," he said. "Just got employed today," he added immediately with a stupid grin of innocence.

"I see. Can you… leave us alone?"

"Of course. If you need anything, Sir, just – "

I glared at him, and he just closed the door behind him quickly. I could still feel his aura, he was running away like a little girl.

Fuuko and I were alone at last.

"What is it? What? Are you sick?" Fuuko shot me questions.

"Nah. He's just babbling," I lied again with such an innocent face I tried to make.

"He didn't seem like he was babbling. Tell me the truth, Mi-chan," she said, eyeing me. I was a bad liar, wasn't I? Ugh.

I didn't say anything.

Should I?

Should I really tell her the truth?

What if she back from me?

What if… I'd lose her?

I couldn't tell her.

At least,

not now.

She had her hands on my shoulder, shaking me slightly, but I didn't say a word.

Then, she touched my cheek with her smooth right hand. Her left hand lift my face so she could stare right into my eyes.

I couldn't help myself, but every inch of my skin started to grew hot.

Oh crap.

I BLUSHED. B-L-U-S-H-E-D! Need more spelling lessons? I BLUSHED! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…………

And to my surprise, I saw she blushed too!

Okay, didn't expect this…, didn't expect this… I could feel myself grew hotter and hotter… I must looked like a tomato right now, with silver leaves.

"Mi-chan," she said softly, "Tell me the truth. I won't do anything, and I promise, things are going to stay the same."

If she found it confiding, I found it rather disturbing. How could she tell that things are going to stay the same? I'm dying, didn't she know that? Things could not stay the same, they just weren't meant to be, and aren't meant to be, and NOT going to be.

"I…" I started, looking away from her. But she lifted up my face again and stared deep into my eyes with her amethyst ones.

Oh crap, don't stare me like that.

Please, stare at something else!

It seemed that I had lost my tongue and my voice, and my nerves to say 'no'.

"My spinal cord is crushing," I finally found my voice. "That's why I collapsed, it was so painful that I could help it but give up."

Now she was shocked. Her eyes widened, and I could sense that every single inch of her body was tensed.

To my surprise,

she didn't do anything as I expect she would.

Instead,

she hugged me.

"You're the most idiotic person I have ever met, Mi-chan," she said softly. Oh my, was that suppose to be a relieving speech? But never mind, SHE HUGGED ME! FUUKO HUGGED ME! If only I could move my arms, I'd hug her back, but they were kind of paralyzed right now.

Then, she did the most idiotic thing I could have ever imagined.

She gave a soft kiss on my lips.

"Wh - ?" I stuttered stupidly. I felt SO idiotic now, and again, I was blushing like mad. I guess, I couldn't be the 'normal' me, the Ice Prince, when Fuuko was around, could I?

She hugged me back, "Thanks for being honest."

Okay, I didn't understand.

"I love you."

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Four years had passed.

Four years.

Fuuko and I had been going out for the last four years.

FOUR YEARS!

It's quite a long time, isn't it?

And not just the 'four years' thingy…

We're engaged!

And getting married next September…

"Good evening, Mi-chan!" Fuuko's voice filled my heart with warmth. I was working as the head of a hospital at the moment, and she was a hard-working lawyer, who had won almost every case given to her, except for one case (it was a divorce and the husband seemed so desperate), she lost. I was behind my working desk, checking the new future-doctors resumes. I was supposed to choose five of the best and interview them, then choose two of the best again. But it all faded when Fuuko came into my office.

"Hi, Fuuko," I replied, smiling widely. We picked each other up from work in rows. Monday is my turn, Tuesday's hers, Wednesday's mine, Thursday's hers, Friday's mine, and so on… Weird, but cute, isn't it? Today was Tuesday, so it was her turn. It was all Fuuko's idea. To save some gasoline, she said defensively when I asked her the reason. Ah well, it's up to you, Fuuko dear.

About my crushing spinal cord. Well, I was on treatment. A doctor could be sick and I was sick before I even be a doctor. My condition was getting better and better quite fast. The doctor, my friend Mary, even admitted that she had never seen someone with such an improvement! I guess it was because the feeling of love… Ahh… Yeah, I'm in love. I'm in love with Fuuko.

"Are you done yet?" she asked in front of me.

I made a few ticks here and there, closed the document as I said, "I'm done now."

"Let's go."

I nodded, then pulled off my white top. I don't need to wear a doctor's uniform while having fun with my fiancé, do I?

We got on her BMW 323 car (it was black colored) and it was her who sat behind the driver's seat.

"How's your spinal cord, Mi-chan?" Fuuko started the conversation.

"Mary said that it's getting so much better," I replied shortly. To be honest, I wasn't in such a talking mood. I was really tired of all day's work and the real thing was… I actually wanted to go home and sleep. But there was Fuuko, so I had to postpone my schedule a bit, and… I didn't mind at all.

"Mary? Who's she?"

"The doctor who's been treating my spinal cord," I replied casually. I wanted to add a 'duh', but Fuuko seemed a little bit pissed. "Are you OK with that? Coz if you don't, I'm going to see another doctor," I said quickly when I saw that Fuuko was driving a little too fast. She was certainly jealous, no need for an expert to solve that. Oh my God. This was baadddddd….

"No, no. It's okay," she said, smiling. Good, her speed was slowing down. It was almost ten at night, but still, it was dangerous for her – US – to drive more than ninety kilometer per hour! And did I mention we're still in TOKYO?

We stayed silent for a few moment. I only stared at her figure.

Then, a thunder struck in the middle of the night, without even a rain.

She wasn't wearing her ring.

You know, the ring that a man ALWAYS gives to a woman to propose her?

I gave her a simple-designed silver ring with a touch of sand diamonds and a ruby stone onto it.

But it just…

Wasn't there, on her ring finger.

I glanced at her right hand, which was on the steering wheel, but saw none.

"Fuuko…" I said carefully and as polite, as NOT PISSED, as possible. "Where's the engagement ring I gave you?"

"Oh, what? I'm sorry. What did you say?" she said, not having the nerves to look straight to my eyes. If I were her, I would not too. She was driving a car, looking straight at my eyes would be a suicide – not to mean a homicide too. But if I were her, I'd hear what I just said… you know what I mean.

"Where's the engagement ring I gave you?" I repeated, trying to sound light and relax… and all… Cool and calm, cool and calm...

She didn't reply.

Okay… did something happen to the ring?

Say something, I'd like to hear your POV of the story. Even though the ring was missing or gone, I'd be okay with it, as long as you'd tell me the truth.

"Fuuko dear?"

She stepped on the acceleration pedal even harder.

Something REAL BAADDDDD had happened, I presume.

"Fuuko, if the ring's gone, it's OK," I said a rather terrified of her driving speed.

She stepped harder.

"Fuuko…"

"I lost it," she mumbled.

"It's OK," I said again. "Can you tell me how exactly did you lose it?"

Again, she stayed silent and stepped harder on the acceleration pedal. What? Did I say something wrong? I only asked for the reason, was it wrong?

"Fuuko, please slow down," I said, fearing the worst.

Her eyes started to become watery, a second later, tears were streaming down her face.

"Oh my God, Fuuko, what is it?" I asked worriedly, expecting nothing.

She wiped off her tears with her free hand and with an almost squealing – half screaming voice said, "I cheated on you!" she said between sobs, and continued, still sobbing and still with her sudden weird high-pitched voice, "I cheated on you! I went to a nightclub last night with some friends from work and… and…" she lost her voice again.

I knew it. She had sex with another man. Wait a moment, girls usually don't do such a thing, do they? Boys are the one who are famous of the reputation although few of them don't actually do it. Like me, I'm still a virgin, until I get married (it's a 'must', isn't it, on marriages, I mean?). But… Fuuko? How… how could she? Didn't she realize that we're getting married? Why did she follow her friends? Damn it, even I only went to a nightclub THRICE A YEAR! I sat still, as stiff as a rock, as confused as a lost bird, not knowing what to say, or what to do.

The January's snow rain began to fall delicately. The snow rain wasn't pouring too hard, but at this speed of a car, yea, our lives were at stake – scram it, at demon's stake.

Without realizing it, jealousy began to consume me. I didn't know what had gotten me so angry, but I was more than angry, I was furious. I couldn't believe that she cheated on me. I never cheated on her, why would she do that?

That must be an accident. She must had been drunk, a little voice behind my mind said. I was going to clear my mind when another thunder struck again.

Fuuko was with me yesterday. I was at her house until about one a.m. The nearest nightclub from her house is one and a half hour away. She couldn't have gone to the nightclub.

One conclusion:

Fuuko lied.

"You were with me last night, Fuuko!" I said, surprised that my voice was so loud, high, and so… angry. "We were together, watching a movie until one a.m.! The nearest nightclub is one and a half hour away and it closes at two!" And don't ask me how I know it, I added mentally.

She was driving at the BMW's top speed. Things we passed seemed blurry, but I didn't care a bit.

"I'm sorry… I'm so, so sorry…" she sobs again.

"Whom did you have sex with?" I asked with clenched teeth. My voice was calm as I tried to be, but it was unexpectedly dangerous.

She stayed silent again.

"Cut out the silence, Fuuko. I want you to answer me honestly," I said coldly.

"T-Tanaka S-S-S-S-Shi-Shi-Shishido," she stuttered, trembling hardly.

I knew it. Shishido was one of Fuuko's friends from work. I had been eyeing quite a time, because he had been acting quite funny around Fuuko and me. Especially when I paid a visit once every two days to her office. They all there knew Mikagami-sempai, I even knew him! We were quite close! I couldn't believe of what I just heard from my fiancé's mouth.

I didn't say a word. Instead, I stared out from the window at the passenger's front seat. I needed time to think. To think about what I should do, what I should say, and how should I react. She had sex, and all at once, lost her engagement ring. Was it that bad? Yea, IT WAS.

"Fuuko, please slow down," I pleaded with quite a rude voice. I regretted it the moment I said it.

She was going to slow down, but another thunder struck again. I just hoped it was the last – or so I thought. This one had its friends with it.

"Oh no!" she cried, letting go of the acceleration pedal and kept stomping the break pedal. "It isn't working!"

Oh. My. God. Why do all the things similar to that always happen in a time like THIS!

I pulled the hand-break slowly so our bodies wouldn't be thrown out off the window, but it broke too. It suddenly felt so light and weak.

I didn't say anything, but watching in fear as Fuuko trying to control her car. I just wanted to be like Recca and Yanagi… happily married, happily having three cute children…

"Mi-chan," she said, "I knew I lied. I didn't want to tell you at first, but…" her voice trailed off, and I let her talk. I wanted to hear her explanation so bad – and ruined it.

"I didn't mean it. I was drunk. Shishido lured me to drink some beers, and I did. I knew it was my fault too that I fell into his lure," she added immediately when I was about to say something. I shut my mouth again, folding my arms like a stubborn child.

"Then, he started to…" her voice trailed off again, "and we…" she lost her voice for the third time. "Then I couldn't find the ring anywhere in sight…

"I'm sorry, Mi-chan. I'm so sorry! It's a thing that I'd regret the rest of my life! I'm sorry!"

She was about to cry again.

If she thought that tears could softened my heart,

She was wrong.

"Do you think an apologize is enough?" I asked her with my coldest voice. "For what I've done to you, you… cheated on me? Worse, you even lied! How… how could you!" My tone was getting higher and angrier every second.

"Mi-chan…"

"Don't call me by that stupid name!" I snapped. I lost control of myself, but the weird thing was… I enjoyed it.

"Mi-chan, please…"

"NO! How am I able to know that you won't cheat on me anymore!" I yelled at her, my temper was at the surface. "Gosh, I think of you too high, Kirisawa."

BANG!

I didn't see a thing, I only heard noises.

I had Fuuko's hand in mine, but it wasn't as warm as it used to be anymore, it was getting cold.

I too, suddenly felt chilly. I also felt sharp pain from my back and non-existent legs. But the most painful throb was in my chest.

I was scared, I was afraid. I was fearful to look my surroundings, to look at Fuuko's… lifeless body. So I didn't have the dare to open my eyes. I shut them down, not willing to look at anything anymore.

It's funny, I thought. We just had this terrible fight, and we crashed a truck without even having a chance to end it. How stupid could I be? Our lives were fading out, and I hadn't given her my forgiveness. What if she had died, without even knowing that I… had forgiven her? The thought was so painful in my chest.

I heard Fuuko's horrified scream when we were about to crash and immediately held her hand in mine. But eventually, it was no use. I just knew it. It was no use. And it was just a reflect. I didn't mean anything by it.

Am I going to survive?

Am I going to have a family?

No, said a little voice at the back of my mind.

I was hopeless.

"Mi…chan…" Fuuko suddenly let out a cry of whisper.

I was desperate to answer her, but only let out a gasp of blood and a painful groan. Say something, I tried to voice out, but none come.

"I just want you to know…" she whispered weakly, "I'm sorry… I didn't mean to… it was a night of full accident…" she sobbed.

"It's… OK… I… accept your apology…"

"I'm guilty for this accident, Mi-chan. I'm so very sorry too… for what happened last night…" I heard her, inhaling breath with difficulty, "I see golden light, Mi-chan…"

What are you talking about, Fuuko? I surely didn't see any. Fuuko, please don't leave me...

"I want you to know, before I die – "

"You're not – " I let out a gasp of blood, " – going to die." I tightened my grip at her hand, "I was consumed with jealousy the moment you confessed. My mind wasn't clear… I didn't know exactly how to react, how to… answer at this kind of situation…"

"I'm sorry… can I call you Mi-chan again…?"

"I love it, Fuuko… and please, it's a human nature… the good thing is…" I coughed, and felt my voice grew rather husky, "…that you actually… feel guilty about it… you didn't mean to do it, did you?"

"No… it was all pure accident… I'm so sorry… Jeez, I feel so regretful…! How evil of me to betray your love…"

"Fuuko.."

"My love to you…" her breathing started to become harder and louder, "is beyond anything is life. We shall meet again, Mi-chan… in the next life…"

"No, Fuuko – "

She continued, "And fall in love, married, then have lots of children… I've always wanted three, Mi-chan…" She seemed so happy when she talked about it.

I felt hot knives on my eyes, and a tear escaped my eyelids, then another, and another… I was crying, but it didn't hurt my high ego at all.

"It's a completely hopeless dream right now, isn't it?" she said under her breath, cheerfulness had faded.

"No, Fuuko… you're going to survive… we're going to have three awesome children…"

Hot knives were stabbing my whole body like mad now. Every inch of my body parts were throbbing like hell. I was weakly paralyzed. I could only hear, couldn't move, and couldn't see because of my fear.

"Mi-chan… it isn't my wish that we should be apart from each other…"

"We're going to be together. Forever," I assured her, but me myself wonder… how? I sniffed. "Oh God, please don't leave me, Fuuko…"

Her grip started to become weaker.

"We shall meet again, Mi-chan… in the next life… remember me always, ne?" she coughed, "Even if you're in the South Pole and I'm in the North Pole…" It was a silly thing for her to say, but I got the meaning.

"We will, Fuuko… how can we ever forget each other…? No matter how far we're going to separate… we would always find out love back…"

"Thank you…"

Her grip existed no more.

"Fuuko?" I called, shaking her hand a bit with all the strength I had left.

"Fuuko!" I cried, tears streaming down my face.

I lost her.

My worst fear had come true.

I lost my love, my angel, my goddess, my life… Kirisawa Fuuko.

Then, I saw golden light. There was a beautiful angel in it.

It was… - I blinked twice - Fuuko.

I reached out my hand, and touched hers.

A smile crept into my face, and for what I saw, she too, smiled.

Our love is eternity.

And we are destined to be together.

Even death will not separated me from my angel, nor she to her prince.

Our love is beyond words.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

.owari.

ANGSTY! AAAAARRGGHH…. I don't know why I feel so angsty at this very moment! And it's 12.09 a.m. I thought that I just HAVE TO finish this fan fic today, and I did! I mean, before I go to bed… At least Fuuko and Tokiya are reunited, right? I pitied him, especially when he stayed alive at my previous one-shot angsty fan fic: My Confession, My Regrets. I thought that I just HAVE TO let him die. Sometimes, being alive is worse than being dead, isn't it? Some things in this fic seemed too… drastic and impossible, right? I mean, trainee doctor… HAH! I just could thing of anything else. And a BMW, crashing a truck… well, I assure you, they shouldn't have died if they were riding a BMW, but I love it when my characters die. Hahaha… let out an evil maniac laugh

At first, I wanted this story to go based on my friend's quote: True love stays eternity, even inseparable by death but then again it doesn't hold too much 'lessons', and angst. So I just make the story based on my quote:. You'll find something important, dear to your heart, when you've lost it…They crashed before Tokiya had forgiven Fuuko, right? Although both of the story IS based on both of the quotes… hmm.. I felt such pity on Tokiya so I just had to make him forgive Fuuko when they were about to die. Ah well, such a romance junkie I am! (and proud of it!) Beside, the longer the fan fic is, the more I like it… although it's not quite a good principal.. hmm… It has nothing to do with the plot, swear.

Thanks to Yanagi-chyan, who actually, requested this fic (to let Tokiya die). Ohoho… don't know where I got this, but torturing my favorite character seems to be a habit of me now. Maybe from psychedelic aya? She mentioned it in her profile… and don't you just think she's a really cool author? (No offense for the other authors who are reading my confusing, seems-like-endless note now). YOU GUYS ROCK! Thankies for reading, I hope you'll read my next one, or my other fan fics in my profile page.

One last thing:

PLEASE REVIEW!