Disclaimer: I own nothing; it all belongs to J.K.Rowling. I'm just borrowing the characters to play with for a while. This is for pleasure only, no profit is being made, and no copyright infringement is intended.
Author's Note: This is a sequel to "Where in the World is Harry Potter?" Read that first to make much sense of this story. There will be spoilers for that one.
Harry Potter had soundly defeated the Dark Lady FoxFire and her followers were quickly apprehended as well. Now that the immediate threat had abated, the Ministry was beginning to set up court sessions for all the perpetrators. The many members of the Ministry had begun reparations on all the damaged parts and were preparing statements to address the public. The people from Hogwarts all took this opportunity to head back to the castle and a delicious Leaving Feast.
Professor Hermione Granger, Professor Severus Snape, Headmaster Albus Dumbledore, Caretaker Nymphadora Tonks, and Harry Potter all arrived back in the Headmaster's office at Hogwarts. The public reappearance of Harry Potter seemed less important after the dangers and attack at the Ministry.
"Harry, would you like to join us for the Feast?" Albus asked with a kind smile. "Whether you do or not I would also like you to stay tonight for an emergency Order meeting. This threat may be neutralized but we will at least need to discuss it."
Harry gave Albus a harsh stony-faced stare. He wouldn't break eye contact or blink and the rest of the room just watched them in silence. Finally, Harry just smiled and said, "Yeah, I was planning on the meeting, but eating in the Great Hall in disguise or the kitchens makes no difference to me." Harry smiled and quickly shifted his form into that of Remus Lupin since he was a common visitor to the castle and staff table.
They made their way into the Great Hall, where the meal had begun, and Minerva had already proudly declared Gryffindor the winners of this year's House cup. Seated next to her was Nicholas Flamel, who was carefully watching all the Order members filing into seats at the Staff table.
The Headmaster stood and attracted their attention. "I apologize for interrupting your meal, but I must share some grievous news." He paused and looked over at all the curious faces. "The Ministry of Magic was attacked by a self-proclaimed Dark Lady FoxFire and her own brand of Dark followers. They destroyed a number of areas and there was at least six confirmed fatalities." Albus paused and his eyes lit up with hope and promise. "She was quickly and soundly defeated by the arrival of Harry Potter, and her followers were shortly thereafter subdued. We are not yet sure of all the damage that has been done or how bad it is, but the immediate threat has passed." Albus's eyes twinkled a bit and if you watched closely he was even smirking a little. "I know how much Mr. Potter despises attention and people praising his name, so let us take advantage of his absence and raise our glasses in a toast," Albus lifted his goblet into the air, "To Harry Potter!" He loudly finished with a proud smile.
"To Harry Potter!" was heard loudly echoing all around the Great Hall. A number of people exclaimed "Praise be to Harry!" While others cheered and yelled back, "Praise be to Potter!"
Nicholas was frowning harshly, particularly at Albus when he turned to smirk at Nicholas. Nicholas also noticed Remus was scowling especially harshly though subtly winking at him.
Albus sat back down and the feast continued. Nicholas had slowly and quietly stood up and was sneaking up behind 'Remus Lupin.' When he was directly behind him and at point blank range, he yelled out "Stupefy!" extremely loudly and a vicious stunner slammed into Remus' back. He slumped into unconsciousness and fell face first onto his dinner plate.
Albus and Hermione, the only two who really knew what was going on, just goggled incredulously at Professor Flamel. He smiled broadly at them and gave them a thumbs up. "Finally! We've got the sexy little bugger!" Nicholas exclaimed to his colleagues. He vaguely noticed he had attracted the attention of the entire student body who were watching the head table extremely curiously.
Minerva McGonagall had a worried look at her face, most likely due to Nicholas' interesting choice of descriptive adjectives.
Nicholas smiled to the students and just said, "Don't mind me. Nothing to see here folks. Carry on."
He reached into one of his robe's many pockets and found a couple of dark metal bracelets and attached them to Remus' wrists. He then conjured a leash and collar around Remus' neck and dragged him out of the Hall. The students just seemed to watch this scene and then went back to their meals. They all knew their DADA teacher, Professor Flamel, was a bit peculiar and apparently found this relatively normal behavior. The staff was just watching in shock. Hermione and Albus exchanged several worried glances at each other. Draco and Severus were both smirking victoriously though.
Professor Flamel arrived back in the Great Hall just as the students were all leaving, and after a brief discussion with Albus found out about the Order meeting that would be in his office in just two hours.
The Order had assembled in the Headmaster's office and Nicholas Flamel was there with his 'prisoner' Remus Lupin, who was still unconscious. He was attracting some odd looks from most members, particularly after Remus arrived and saw him. Remus just shook his head and had a feeling Harry probably deserved whatever Nicholas had in store for him.
Albus stood and began the meeting. "As you all have heard, the Ministry was attacked this afternoon. Seven people were killed, though two of those were followers of this Dark Lady FoxFire. Additionally, another nine members of the Ministry were loyal followers of her as well. Several other members were put under the Imperius curse for the purposes of today's attack by some of her loyal followers. She was swiftly and soundly defeated by the ubiquitous Mr. Potter. Who is, it appears, a current prisoner of Nicholas' at the moment."
The entire Order shifted their heads to look at the widely smiling kooky old man, and his unconscious prisoner to whom all signs pointed to him being Harry Potter, despite appearing to be Remus Lupin. Or at least one of the two in the room.
Nicholas smugly explained, "Caught me a big one boys. This one's a keeper. At least 80 kilos-"
"Oi! I'll have you know I weigh 77, thank you very much." And very quickly the room realized Harry was not quite as unconscious as they thought.
Nicholas smirked at the man who morphed back into his more familiar appearance as Harry Potter. "You might want to check your scale, because I think all this inactivity has left you a bit soft. You've spent too much time sitting down researching and stuffing your craw full of sweets."
The Order was looking a little worried when Harry just growled back at Nicholas.
Harry shook his bound wrists in front of him. "And what's with the bracelets? You think just by binding my wandless magic you can keep a hold of me?"
Severus Snape smiled at his so-called Master's predicament. "We can certainly try."
Harry snapped his head towards the Slytherin Head of House. He stared at him defiantly. When Severus responded with a smirk, Harry just smiled. And with no warning of sound a red colored spell shot out of what appeared to be Harry's eyes and was headed straight at the Potions Master. Severus jumped out of his seat with a yelp and took cover on the floor. The spell smacked into the back of Snape's now vacant chair and left it slightly singed.
"Well you keep on trying now Severus. And later you can let me know how that worked out." Harry said with a smile as the slightly embarrassed man got back into his seat as he was grumbling to himself.
Harry's smile went away as his attention became directed on Professor Flamel. "And you, you old crackpot! If you'd taken the time to ask someone, you'd know I already had agreed to come to this meeting. No kidnapping and pointless shackling necessary."
Nicholas shrugged. "Oops?"
Harry rolled his eyes. "Lunatic. So what's up? Everyone know what happened? Get some information from Ms. FoxFire?"
Albus felt a bit scared with both Nicholas and Harry in this meeting. Particularly since they spent most of it arguing. That and the fact that they were the same person left him feeling like his abilities as an armchair psychiatrist would be insufficient and Harry needs to seek professional help. Perhaps a group session or couples counseling with Harry and Nicholas together. Albus quickly remembered he had been asked a question before his daydream got too far into uncharted territories. "Ahh yes. The Dark Lady FoxFire. She wasn't quite so homicidally psychopathic as Tom, but she wanted to try and pull the Wizarding World even further from the muggle world and felt a revolution was the easiest way. She assumed you were gone or she would never have acted." Albus' eyes twinkled. "Apparently Mr. Potter, just your reappearance was enough to essentially break her spirit. I doubt she will be any sort of threat and expect any more of her followers will be even more scared of you."
"At least some people want to leave me alone." Harry mumbled.
"Oh come on, Harry," Nicholas smiled. "You're among friends. You can admit you love the attention."
Harry got up and looked at Nicholas furiously for even suggesting such a thing.
Severus' eyes went wide. "I knew it!"
Harry turned around to face Snape. "Severus, I don't think you want to make me angry right now."
Nicholas mocked, "Oh yes. Merlin forbid you look flustered in your next photo opportunity."
Harry whipped his head around quickly to Nicholas and a red spell flew out his eyes again. Nicholas calmly reinforced his shield and sent the spell straight back at Harry. Harry fell to the floor and ducked with a smile on his face while the spell flew over his head. Severus felt a jolt of pleasure explode through his arm and jumped up out of his seat. Just in time to catch the red spell, which as it turned out was a tickling charm, right in the crotch.
The Potions Master collapsed on the floor letting out a continuous moan while his thighs and upper legs convulsed from the charm. Harry was just cracking up, laughing out loud, and the humor seemed to spread as others were now too laughing at the strange movements and sounds the former spy was making on the floor.
Nicholas looked a bit indignant despite smiling and exclaimed, "You did that on purpose!"
Harry smiled and retorted, "So did you!"
Severus slowly wheezed out, "I'm… going… to… kill… you… both."
Less than a minute later, Professor Snape's spasms seemed to have passed and he just lay there breathing deeply.
The real Remus Lupin spoke up. "Umm, Harry? I know you can probably still do thought magic beyond just wandless right now, but are you really shooting spells out your eyes?"
Harry smiled and turned towards Remus. "To be honest, I've never tried. If it didn't work, I'd probably fry my eyeballs so I think I'll put off trying for a while." Harry scrunched his eyes briefly and his eyeglasses reappeared on his face. "I keep an invisibility charm on the glasses most of the time, even though I don't need them anymore. But you may recognize the round metal of the frames as being remarkably similar to the rings I showed most of you at Christmas."
More people were now catching onto the usefulness of the rings.
Nicholas continued. "Anyways, as you may know, if you've been talking to Hogwarts, I'm not coming back as Defense Professor, and we think you should take the job."
"Why would I want to do that? From what I hear the job is cursed."
Snape grumbled out "How much more cursed can you get than Harry Potter taking the job."
A number of people laughed at that. Even Harry was chuckling. "I'll let that one slide, Sevvie. Seeing as you've already provided me with enough entertainment for the day." Harry turned his attention to the Headmaster. "But before I agree, I just want to make sure you all realize what you're signing up for."
Albus looked a bit shocked. He thought Harry had already agreed. And then he realized that that too had been bound by the knowledge suppression hex. Albus smiled. "I think we have a pretty good idea."
"Really?" Harry stated with wide eyes. "Because I'm a bit unhinged. And you have to be getting barmier with age if you are asking me to corrupt young children."
Albus was beginning to agree a bit with Harry and decided to squelch that line of thinking quickly. "I'm well aware we may be sorting students with more maturity than you, Mr. Potter, but I have complete faith in your abilities to teach the subject."
Harry frowned at the dig before thinking about it and agreeing to a point. "Alright." He then smirked victoriously. "But remember, you asked for this."
Albus' age was clearly showing and he nodded with a weak smile.
Harry looked around. "Anything else you need from me tonight? I used a fair amount of magic earlier and would like a good night's sleep. Never tried turning into a nundu before."
No one spoke up, though a few people seemed jealous and wished they could turn into a nundu.
Albus looked down at his hands in surprise. "Where did these handcuffs come from?"
Harry smiled brightly and raised his bracelet free hand. "Right here old man. I'll be in touch with you soon. Toodles all." And with a pop Harry disappeared from the Headmaster's office.
Nicholas jumped up from his seat. "How the heck did he get rid of those bracelets? They had been keyed in specifically to my magic!"
Albus frustratingly exhaled. "I wonder."
Nicholas winced. "Oh dear. I suppose he's changed the password counter-curse."
Albus frowned. "Are you sure you don't know the password counter?" He pleaded, "Are you really sure?"
Nicholas tapped his chin thoughtfully. "I feel like I should know it." He sighed and just shook his head.
Hermione was struggling in her chair and managed to say "urgh" a few times.
A grumpy, handcuffed Albus Dumbledore leaned back and sighed loudly. "This year is going to suck."